At last... the cane that I got for free from ene of these government
websites arrived in the mail. It to be about a feet long to put away when
not in use,
I knew it was a good chance for a joke, just wasn' t sure what. Then my friend called
me up to know if I' d go with him to do some Christmas shopping, and it finally hit
We' re at the mall and I tell him we' re grabbing something to eat and he just needs to
play alang; if sameone is getting angry with me, that he should consider it rude en
their part. He' s used to my games and knews that something epic will happen if he
So we' re sitting in the feed court, when the perfect target takes a seat a couple
tables in front of us:
Tatally hot chick with rack; low cut shirt that says to the entire world that
she knows she has great breasts; and doubt a superior "fuck you for trying to talk
to me" attitude as is typical for a tital bitch.
I just blankly stare at her chest the entire time I' m eating my food, never breaking my
eyes from her direction no matter what expression appears en her face.
My buddy notices this and asks, "Hey, what' re you planning? You know this won' t
get you laid."
I tell him to shut up and to be ready to became as angry as she does, should things
So finally, she gets up and walks up to me, I just keep looking in the same direction
until she' s right in frend of me and asks, "What the hell are you staring at??"
I leek up and stare at her threat to threw her off a little.
You! Yeu' been staring at my tits for god knows how long I' been sitting here!"
Listen, I' m serry if it seemed like that, buil aisu-"
BULLSHITE You were staring at my tits Constantin for mere than five minutes!"
My buddy interjects with the perfect timing, "Hey, what the hell is your problem?"
I say, "hey, don' t worry about it man. You done eating?"
I stand up, "let' s just get what we came here for, You want to take me to find that
I can tell she' s a bit cinfused by the last sentence, but my buddy says, "Sure,"
At that point, I put en my sunglasses, and then pull the cane from my cead packet
whipping it to , making it look like a maneuver.
I say, "let' s get geing."
I turn to my side - not quite facing the girl - and see her entire face go white as
bystanders her with disapproving gazes.
Again, I' m sorry for any misgivings,"
My buddy grabs my arm and starts to walk me away.
As we start to move off, he has to keep himself from bursting out in laughter as all
the people around us say things like, "what a stuck up bitch,"
Who the hell does she think she is?''
If she works at this mall, we' re talking to her manager and having her fired!"
Knowing we accomplished the perfect lulz, and booked ourselves a ticket
en the to Hell, we strutted off triumphantly, with a leek en em faces that
yeu' d only ever see en a successful IRL hell.