British rescue operation.
Use stealth tactics to get into the enemy building. Use silenced
weapons and gas to disable combatants and avoid detection.
Rescue victim quickly and without taking any casualties.
American rescue operation.
Roll up in Hummers, because they are cool. Throw grenades at
building until everyone inside is dead, because explosions are
fucking cool. Drag corpse of person you Just 'rescued' out of the
rubble and stick American flag in them. High five anyone in your
platoon still alive.
An American walked into an English pub and asked for a
pint of Budweiser.
The barman replied "You' re American aren' t you'?"
The man says, "Yeah. Could you tell by the drink I ordered,
or the accent?"
The barman replied. "Neither, you are the fattest fuck I
have ever seen."
America: a country where people believe the moon landing is
fake, but wrestling is real.
Statistically EH , Americans won' t get this.
How do you convince Americans to get involved in a
America: putting the oops
Tell them it' s nearby finished.
into troops.
What' s the best way to pick " aliens are looking
up American girls'? for intelligent life,
why are Americans
a crane. so fucking worried?
Simple test to know if you' re American
1 " If you pronunciation is, like, you know, like, this,
you know what I' m saying'?
2 " " you are reading this while eating a
hamburger.
3 " " you say can I get, instead of may I have.
It " " you play "football" with your hands. (and
you' re not Maradonna.
5 " " you' re morbidly obese.
E " " you' re obsessed with waving fucking flags.
T - " you' re gramp was Scottish, you think I fucking
know him.
Here you go America! This one' s for you. AND you' ll be
able to understand it?’
Yo momma' s so fat...
she must be American.
...