Page yourself over the intercom. [Don' t disguise your voice.)
Find out where your boss shops and buy exaactly the same
outfits. Always wear them one day after your boss does. (This
is especially effective if your boss is a different gender than you
Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refered them
only by liaise names. Whats a good point, Sparky." “No I' m
sonar I' m going to have to disagree wilie you there, Chachi.“
Send email to the rest of the company telling them what you' re
doing. For example “If anyone needs me, I' ll be in the
bathroom.“
Hoplite" your shoes. Tell people that you haven' t lost your
shoes since you did this.
While siding at your desk, soak your fingers in "Palmolive."
Put up mosquito netting around your cubicle.
Put a chair facing a printer, sit there all day and tell people
you' re waiting for your document.
Arrive at a meeting late, say you' re sorry, but you didn' t have
lime for lunch, and you' re going to be nibbling during the
meeting. During the meeting eat 5 entire raw potatoes.
Insist that your femail address be
zena_ goddess_ of_ ftrw@ . com"
Every lime someone asks you to do something, ask them if
they want fries With that.
Send em all to yourself engaging yourself in an intelligent
debate about the direct on of one of your company' s products.
Forward the mail to a and ask her to settle the
disagreement.
Encourage your colleagues to join you in a lime synchronized
chair dancing.
Put your garbage can on your desk. Label it "IN."
Determine how many cups of coffee is “too many."
Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
Decorate your office with picrures of Cindy Brady and Danny
Partridge, Try to pass them off as your children.
For a relaxing break, get away from it all with a mask and
snorkel in the fish tank. If no one nolifes, take out your snorkel
and see how many you can catch in your moulin.
Send femail messages saying free pizza, free donuts etc... in
the lunchroom, when people complain that there was none...
Just lean back, pat your stomach, and say, "Oh you' got to
be faster than that."
Put decaf in the coffeemaker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has
gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
...
