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#34 - anon id: ececef21

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#30 - smithybfc

Reply+44

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#28 - riefenstahl

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I would buy a house with stairs just for the sake of that situation

#26 - muffcabage

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Seen this so many times...

#25 - themastertroller

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sort of like saying "come in" when someone knocks on your bathroom stall and you're taking a dump

#19 - cannonofanon

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This is almost like when the cop said MARCO and whoever he was looking for said POLO

#21 to #19 - Bruda

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I heard the same thing but it was an army guy trying to save his buddy who was captured in a POW camp and another about a Fireman trying to get someone out of a burning building

#18 - severepwner

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Red Robins.

#16 - anon id: d91036b4

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#13 - jwash

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**jwash rolled a random image posted in comment #252 at WTF Ronaldo ** joke related to picture

#10 - vedgetable

Reply+232

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imagine them telling a ------ joke and hearing "------S!" from upstairs

#62 to #10 - klondikemonster

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#22 to #10 - finni

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#20 to #10 - redflame

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What if someone would open the door and said, I brought the KFC!

#8 - Exem

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this repoast is becoming burnt

#7 - tannertheguy

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>couple comes home
>man tells joke
>lolololol
>waiti heard 3 people laugh
>me you but who is the other
> Wife: honey ill go see
>walks upstairs
sees a man with a square body and head and white eyes
>Who are you
>I Ma Ohw?
>---- ----- dis guy serious
>HONEY I THINK I KNOW THIS GUY
>no it cant be tue, he was killed!
>in the backround you can faintly hear a song
>"In the default skin"
>"roams your world in the default skin"
>---- ---- ---- NOPE
>man: whats wrong?
> ITS HEROBRINE
>----- you lyin, its just some nooby griefer
>lady: Dayummmmm i swear
and thats how my dog learned to fly

#47 to #7 - lulzchap

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#41 to #7 - spidermanrapeskids

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>Profile says aged 40
>Profile picture says "Boom, Headshot"
>Just typed that 'joke'

#29 to #7 - thegreentext

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#24 to #7 - therealslim

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What are you 5

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#5 - twistedmedics

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#4 - gianttroll

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That ---- was the first thing i uploaded on fj. It's ----ing hilarious.

#2 - wigwig

+54

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#23 to #2 - moustacha

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

Not sure, he couldn't open it.

#49 to #23 - syntheticsubstitut

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names!

#97 to #49 - bakerbabymonkey

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#3 to #2 - DingoJ

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whatd he get for his birthday?

nothing, he didnt live that long

#1 - carlose

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"

#40 to #1 - funnyjunktitan

Reply+4

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson went on a camping trip. After sharing a good meal and a bottle of Petrie wine, they retire to their tent for the ---ht.

At about 3 AM, Holmes nudges Watson and asks, "Watson, look up into the sky and tell me what you see?"

Watson said, "I see millions of stars."

Holmes asks, "And, what does that tell you?"

Watson replies, "Astronomically, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and we are small and insignificant. Horologically, it tells me that it's about 3 AM. Meteorologically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you, Holmes?"

Holmes retorts, "Someone stole our tent."

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