16 ' epinsi% pa
Since she deleted it, here it is:
TLDR - Before my vacation i  asked my boyfriend  to open our relationship temporarily. hes regularly having sex
with some girl in our apartment and heartbroken
pretty fucking upset rigth now , going to do my best to explain everything as happen ed.
we had an extended holiday (3 months} planned with my best friend How} for years. We have always talked about it and my
boyfriend (Daniel) knew we were going to do it. She fin ally finished college this December and we put our plan into action.
An oth er friend [Mich elle) went on a similar trip years ago. She and her friend both had Ion glam boyfriends at the time, and they both
ended up ch eating on the trip. A while later their friendship fell apart, and they both revealed each others in fidelity. It got ugly. Michelle
and her boyfriend broke up, her (ex) friend stayed with her boyfriend but from the sounds of it their relationship was severely
At first ithought they were absolutely horrible for doing it, but after talking to her i could see their side of things - months of no sexual
t: , being in a party atmosphere, of course there would be temptation. She' s young, attractive and gets lots of male
attention. The encounter was purely sexual, she was drunk, and they used protection. The next day the boy was out of her life
completely and that was it. Oyeh eventuly disagreed with doing all this behind her boyfriends back though.
Talking with Michelle about a mo nth ago, she asked what going to do about Daniel. I honestly hadnt thought about it like that, i felt
like i could easily go El months with out having sex. And id never want to betray Daniels trust. But Michelle made a good case for
openin o' our relationship while i was away - she said (paraphrasing): "Of course you Ieye Daniel. But traveling is about experiencing
new thin gs, and that includes sex. "mull say it wont happen now, but you just have to trust me that once you re eir youll feel
different. Daniel is going to wonder either way if you re fucking other guys on your trip. Just be upfront with him and see what he
And so that night stalked to him about it. I explained that i wasnt going to be looking to fuck Mew guy isee that attracted to, and
that my Ieye for him was as strong as Her, but i also wanted to be able act freely and party like other girls my age. It was more
contingency if anything - idont plan on fucking other guys, but if it happens it happens. A nigh of partying havethe world away with
people ill never see again sh M ltnt ruin what we had here. Id insist on using protection. And of course he would have the same
opportunity as me, he would be able to freely see girls if he chose to. He wasnt happy, but said he understood. He said "Youve tied
my hands. If it'll you i forbid it, ill still be worried if you re being true to your word. By expressing that this is what you want, eres
nothing i can do to stop you".
Daniels a bit of a homebody - he goes out with his friends on occassion, but most nights he spends in our apartment playing bideo
games or watching netflix. Given his lifestyle i wasnt overly worried hed be hooking up with all these random girls.
Me and Tory left on February IT. Its been and a ton of fun. But its also been stressful. We habent done any partying,
we talked to some guys one night but nothing ca me of it. Tonight i checked my email at an internet cafe and there was a message
from Kay, a sweet old lady who abobe us in our apartment complex.
n have debated for days whether to send this to you and potentially ruin your vacation. But you deserve to kn ow the truth. Daniel
has been seeing another woman since you left. Th ere is no doubt that he is seeing her, she has come ayer most nights and I have
heard them being intimate. You deserve so mu ch better. I' m so sorry.“
ith M ght i could handle this open relationship arrangement. I cant. This message shattered my heart into a million pieces. This isnt
what i intended at all, i wanted the freedom to act in the moment. He is ta king this as a free pass to regularly fuck some girl. And i
have a feeling i kn ow exactly who it is, a girl from his work who was always overly flirty with him.
I regret ever taking Mich elles advice and opening my stupid mouth. Idont want him to fuck other girls, idont want to fuck other guys. I
want this slut out of my apartment Note I am a fucking wreck and need other womens opinions. Tory has been so unhelpful,
basically telling me to grow up and that i got what i asked for. Ho sh it?! People arent allowed to change their minds or regret their
How do I go about contacting him and expressing that this needs to stop NOW with out coming across like a crazy hypocritical bitch?
And let him kn ow that i will be " faithful on my trip? Idont wen kn ow how i am going to look at him when i get home. I am beyond
hurt, this feels so wrong and so sick.
I am going to bed now to try and get some sleep, i will check and respond to all comments tomorrow morning. Thank you I
EDIT: guys, seriously stop it. I know i fucked up, i brought it all on myself. Kicking me while down isnt helping. not asking for your
opinion on my stupid selfish decision, asking the best way to approach this and fix it.
Tory says i should email him saying "what isaid before about opening our relationship was a mistake. I habent slept with anyone
here and idont want to. You re my parter and idont want to compromise what we have. Please be faithful as I will be to you. I Ieye
you." Simply dont tell him about Kay' s email or that i kn ow there' s another woman. Thoughts?