FJ Nation 25: Funny Accents & PhonesshirigamiRank: #3897 FunisvotingBlocksBlocks prevnext Prev Next Well, I said that this post would be vertical since I’m on mobile. So, heeeeeere it iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisssssssssssssssss… join list: FunnyStates (51 subs)Mention History RESULTS: Issue No. 1108: A Whiskey Rebellion Brewing “Many whiskies taste suspiciously like automobile radiators.”Issue No. 993: Drug Deal “Doctors accused of having no heart reply that cardiology isn’t their specialty.”Issue No. 55: Bigtopian Protesters Cry for Full Integration “Minority children spend hours bussing to schools miles away from home.” ISSUES:Issue No. 1445: The Diaclectics of Dialects The Issue: A few days ago, a tourist from Brancaland was hospitalized due to a severe allergic reaction after ingesting street food in Goose City. It turned out he had asked the local vendor about the ingredients, but had been unable to understand her heavily accented reply. The incident has stirred up a debate over what to do about the wildly different dialects of the People’s Republic of FunnyJunk. Debate Points: 1. “Everywhere I go, I see tourists struggling to understand the many different dialects in use in this country,” moans Rajesh Nahasapeemapetilon, your Tourism Minister. “So, how about we help them by printing a guidebook? That way, the tourists and the locals can communicate with each other more easily. Plus, profits from the sale of the book would obviously benefit the national treasury, right?” 2. “Och, awa’ ye go wi’ that rubbish!” scoffs Yoko Thiesen, a resident of a city in the far north of Peoples Republic of FunnyJunk. “We dinnae need tae be panderin’ tae yon tourists; if they cannae understaund wit it is we’re saying, then dae ye really think they shid be comin’ here tae begin with?” She taps her head with a finger. “Think on, Leader, think on.” 3. “I reckon banning tourists for not being able to speak the dialects is a downright preposterous idea,” splutters Daenerys Chen, your Minister of Education. “It is high time that we formed a committee of linguists and dialectologists to develop a new curriculum to make sure every citizen ditches their vernacular language and learns the standard variety instead. This will make language instruction much easier, both for our own students and for foreign learners.” 4. Dismiss the Issue Dinnae Let ‘em Speak tae Y’all? Make ourselves clear. Maehk arrselves clee’r. Make’rselves clear. Dismiss. Vote! (View results) Issue No. 180: Mobile Maladies The Issue: Recent technological developments in mobile phones are raising concerns from your citizens about the possible harm they are doing to the modern generation. Debate Points: 1. “Everyone is just staring at their phone screens these days!” messages anti-mobile lobbyist Ingrid Goff, via the WotsOn chat service. “Between social media, augmented reality games and personal assistant software, people now spend more time looking at and talking to their phones than they do interacting with real people! Let’s not forget the dangers of these distracting devices either: inattentive driving, pedestrian collisions, eye strain, repetitive strain injuries... They’ve caused more deaths than exploding cupboards, the ironing board, and Godzilla put together. I say we create just one hour every lunchtime where everybody is obliged to keep their phones off. Let’s rediscover the art of conversation!” 2. “This is utter nonsense. Mobile phones are nothing other than beneficial to society! I’ll have you know that not one of our privately-funded studies has found the slightest bit of evidence to the contrary!” argues Milhouse Montgomery, CEO of Amber Phones, gesturing towards a wiggly line on a clipboard as he nonchalantly slips a wad of thumbs into your back pocket. “Have you ever seen anyone drop dead in the street just because they were chatting on one of our new uPhone85 models for sale now at low, low prices? No! It’s just blatant scaremongering! I implore the government to dismiss these crackpots’ complaints.” 3. “I don’t believe they’re harmful either,” says Sonequa Suzuki, a teacher. “But it’s obvious to everyone what a detrimental effect it has on our children! Everywhere I look, I’m seeing children as young as four tapping away at the blasted things! Do you know how many lessons I’ve had interrupted by the ‘Crazy Goose’ ringtone, or by little Timmy saying there’s a collectable Pokeachew under my desk? Do you know how many of my pupils think ‘great’ is spelled with a number? Too many! Only adults should be allowed to own and use mobile phones!” 4. Dismiss the Issue Eyes on iPhones? Back in my day, kids actually talked to each other! Ok, boomer. You’ll understand when you’re older. Dismiss. Vote! (View results) prevnext +9 -Favorite +Favorite Unblock User's Content Block User's Content Sub/Block Channels Funisvoting:UploadUnblockBlockSubUnsubsubs: 290