FJ Nation 23: Entering without Consent and a Big WeddingshirigamiRank: #3897 FunisvotingBlocksBlocks prevnext Prev Next Alright, no impromptu parties, no proximal car crashes, no anime night, I've got my focusing music, and I've got Forged in Fire reruns on TV. This post should release on time tonight. It's RESULTS first, then we have two Issues, No. 645 and No. 541. Focussssssssssssssss. join list: FunnyStates (51 subs)Mention History RESULTS: Issue No. 698: I Shot the Sheriff "People who have had childhood imaginary friends are told they can't ever be trusted with guns."Issue No. 60: Supreme Court Nomination "The people elect Supreme Court justices directly."Issue No. 1106: Some Body to Love "Customer satisfaction with online delivery services is at an all time high." ISSUES:Issue No. 645: An Unwarranted Intrusion The Issue: When maverick cop Ellie Gutenberg suspected that city worker T'Challa Navarrete had kidnapped 13-year-old Yoko with murderous intentions, she knew that by the time she applied for a search warrant the poor teen could already be dead. She kicked the door down, and saved the day. In the aftermath, many are asking if she did the right thing, and what lessons the People's Republic of FunnyJunk could learn here. Debate Points: 1. “Why do we even need search warrants anyways?” asks gung-ho police officer Daisy Chew, grizzled long-time partner of the hero cop. “All this bureaucracy does is make it harder for us to find the people responsible for crimes. If you have nothing to hide, then what’s the problem?” 2. “That’s typical police state thinking! Proper procedure protects the populace!” exclaims Inigo Jamieson, a representative of anti-corruption foundation World Of Watchdog. “We need to make it clear that a search warrant must be obtained before forced entry, and we should prosecute this officer for breach of procedure! Can you imagine the police busting in while you’re sharing an intimate moment with your partner? Can you imagine if a cop with a grudge against you decides to break in and wreak havoc with your house on a whim? Is that what you want?” 3. “We do need warrants for sure, but sometimes officers see something that causes them to make a split second decision, when they have to act immediately for the common good, without going through all the proper steps first,” says Chief Miley Powers of the Peoples Republic of FunnyJunk City Police Department. “I think we should judge breaks in protocol by the results. If the suspects were hiding something, then no problem. But if the officer finds nothing, then we have to judge whether their actions were reasonable, or illegal.” 4. Dismiss the Issue Cops or Robbers? Little pig, little pig, let me in. Papers, please. Police police Police police police police Police police. Dismiss. Vote! (View results) Issue No. 551: The Big Fat Junky Wedding The Issue: During the preparations of your niece’s wedding, you publicly announced the government would be paying for the massive and public event, as fulfillment of a promise made to her when she was six years old. A bucketful of economists, a gaggle of giggling advisers, a susurration of confused affiliates, and an infestation of wedding planners are presently debating this matter of ‘national importance’... and are forcing you to join in. Debate Points: 1. “You promised!” screeches your visibly upset niece who has turned into a bridezilla. “I deserve a proper marriage! By proper, I mean all princess-like and suitable for someone of such affluence! So what if the money for that comes from the treasury? It is a TREASURE-y right? That money should be spent on important occasions, like this one! It’s not like I’m going to have another wedding, unless, you know. Besides, you’re the People's Republic of FunnyJunk’s leader. Family occasions matter!” 2. “Why not let us do all the work?” suggests Michelle Humperdink, the People's Republic of FunnyJunk’s top wedding planner and chief editor of Bonjour Magazine. “We’ll do everything necessary for the wedding, cakes, wedding gowns, the flowers, you name it! Sponsoring your niece’s wedding will be the greatest endorsement we could ask for. All you need to do is broadcast the wedding all over the Backend of the Internet. The profits will be through the roof! It’s a win-win!” 3. “This looks like an excellent diplomatic opportunity, Leader,” muses obnoxious Maxtopian diplomat Wangchu Plantagenet, who has been stuffing his face with hors d’oeuvre all day. “The leaders of Maxtopia and Blackacre would love the chance for some civil and peaceful discussion. We’re talking about major conflict resolutions and a few trade agreements. This could all be done with a couple simple arranged marriages, as we noticed you have other nieces and nephews at the right age. They may not like marrying into our royalty, but don’t you want to be remembered as the leader who helped bring about global peace and stability?” 4. “Nobody asked me whether I wanna pay for this!” exclaims disgruntled baker, Bharatendu Weber, who is using a piping bag to write anti-government messages on the cake. “The answer is: I don’t! I pay taxes for important things like police, education, and fixing potholes. If you want a wedding, spend your own damn money. Oh wait, I forgot, the people pay your salary. So quit wastin’ our money on this load of hokey and spend it where it really matters. I think it’s time we people know where we’re putting our labor, and who’s gettin’ what in return!” 5. Dismiss the Issue First Comes Executive Responsibility, then Comes Marriage? Nepotist nuptials. It's a public affair. International interest in a personal union. I now pronounce you a waste of time and money. Dismiss. Vote! (View results) There, that wasn't so hard. And I'm mostly on time, too! I guess it just goes to show that if you really buckle down and work, you can place the blame entirely on other people. Speaking of shifting the blame, we're looking to those crazy Floridians for our legal fun fact today: If on their premises there is a sign that clearly and openly indicates that a dog is a "Bad Dog", the owner mostly isn't liable for any damages caused by the dog. Pay attention to those "BEWARE OF DOG" signs in the Sunshine State, everyone. He was a good boy, he din du nuffin! prevnext +12 -Favorite +Favorite Unblock User's Content Block User's Content Sub/Block Channels Funisvoting:UploadUnblockBlockSubUnsubsubs: 288