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[ 97 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
#5 - roguetrooper
Reply +91 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
What an uncreative way to kill yourself.   
   
 I would make some bird wings I could wear, set myself on fire, then jump off a really high building while shouting,"I am the Phoenix! I will return!" Then as I fell to the ground and my body burned to ash, I would have my identical twin brother create a smoke screen to distract people, then take my place.   
   
People would say,"Oh my god sir, are you okay? Can I get you something?"   
   
Then my brother would stand up, turn to the crowd, and say,"I need about tree fiddy."   
   
It was about that time that everyone noticed that my identical twin brother was 500 feet tall and from the paleolithic era.
What an uncreative way to kill yourself.

I would make some bird wings I could wear, set myself on fire, then jump off a really high building while shouting,"I am the Phoenix! I will return!" Then as I fell to the ground and my body burned to ash, I would have my identical twin brother create a smoke screen to distract people, then take my place.

People would say,"Oh my god sir, are you okay? Can I get you something?"

Then my brother would stand up, turn to the crowd, and say,"I need about tree fiddy."

It was about that time that everyone noticed that my identical twin brother was 500 feet tall and from the paleolithic era.

#68 to #5 - anon id: d4b8f8da
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
oh god that tree fiddy really fukin got me
User avatar #69 to #5 - dmagen
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
this is about 1.5 cuil
#96 to #5 - anon id: f9158cee
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/20/2013) [-]
"identical twin"
I'm sure they'd notice if Nessy took a nosedive while on fire off a skyscraper.

They'd miss the wings though.
User avatar #97 to #96 - roguetrooper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/20/2013) [-]
Oh you clever clogs you.
User avatar #17 to #5 - ctenop
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
I have sulphagenic medication, meaning if I take 6 my blood will turn green/black. Carve into my chest "We have come", tie razor wire round my neck, superglue hands to head, jump of building...land on the floor in a pool of green/black blood with my hands in my own head.
#15 to #5 - sommerli
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
#25 - connorsg
Reply +46 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
good on that truck driver, those are some legit reflexes, aint no one killing themselves on his watch. he aint got time for dat ****.
good on that truck driver, those are some legit reflexes, aint no one killing themselves on his watch. he aint got time for dat ****.
User avatar #19 - killerofmuffins
Reply +25 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
What an asshole, if the driver hadn't noticed him and ran that prick over that would be forever on his conscience.
#45 to #19 - anon id: 6a23e623
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
I've heard a lot about train drivers who suffer mental distress after people throw themselves in front of their trains, most of them quit after the 1st time and then spend their life scarred :/
#37 - anon id: 68bc12d9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
hes not trying to kill himself, hes trying to get money out of an insurance scam
#57 to #37 - anon id: 5b78a705
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
I disagree with you therefore I had to award you with one red thumb.
User avatar #66 to #37 - moldybreadcrumb
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
I don't know, jumping under the tires of a big-ass truck tends to kill people.
User avatar #39 to #37 - einhetvin
Reply +22 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
"Hey they squashed my entire body and my guts are on the street, gimme money please."
#58 to #39 - anon id: 4bf14694
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
you and all the FJers who thumbed this up are ******* retarded. insurance claims are HUGE in russia and anyone will do anything for it. the dude would only have his legs hit. you ******* retard.
#59 to #58 - einhetvin
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
White people so angry these days
White people so angry these days
#23 - mrswagly
Reply +15 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
I don't know if that was a suicide attempt or insurance fraud. Pic unrelated.
#44 - eruptinganus
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
He wasn't trying to kill himself, he was trying to injure himself for insurance money. It happens in the uk as well. People intentionally get into car crashes to claim insurance cash.
#64 to #44 - alexhill
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
You are actually more stupid than the guy in the video. Injure? That would definitely kill him which the guy in the video was trying to do. Please refrain from posting ******** in the future
You are actually more stupid than the guy in the video. Injure? That would definitely kill him which the guy in the video was trying to do. Please refrain from posting ******** in the future
#77 to #64 - tehrealfluttershy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
He jumped under it to where the truck would just hit his legs...   
   
So this gif is more appropriate here.
He jumped under it to where the truck would just hit his legs...

So this gif is more appropriate here.
#56 to #44 - Rellikthebrit
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
I'm sorry but what is the point of that. As I'm 18 my insurance is ridiculously high.  but also your insurance goes up, if you claim. I'm sorry I'm calling ******** on this one. maybe in Russia but not the UK.
I'm sorry but what is the point of that. As I'm 18 my insurance is ridiculously high. but also your insurance goes up, if you claim. I'm sorry I'm calling ******** on this one. maybe in Russia but not the UK.
#63 to #56 - anon id: 74ea5a74
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
You do realize how much money you'd make in a lawsuit?
User avatar #65 to #63 - Rellikthebrit
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
yes but you don't get any money if it's your own fault. This isn't america.
User avatar #52 to #44 - furrypuppy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Well this is a fairly stupid way to get 'injured'. A truck like that is an instant-kill so far I know o.o
User avatar #55 to #52 - bluenapalm
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Yeah Ive seen tons of these Russian car cams where people do **** like that, the guy was trying to get his legs crushed so he could sue the company, I guess a few months in the hospital and horrible pain is worth half a million dollars to some people :I
User avatar #24 - sinonyx
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
i prefer the one where the driver gets out and beats them
User avatar #7 - lordmoldywart
Reply -36 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
I'd beat the **** out of that guy, just enough so that he's in agony but doesn't die as a result of his injuries

Selfish, low-life ****
User avatar #46 to #7 - ffx
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Yes. Beat the crap out of the man who's so depressed he just tried to commit suicide. You're one of the things wrong with the world. Learn to consider what the man is going through (i.e. he might have lost his job and family and thought it was all over) before resorting to such hateful and ignorant thoughts.
User avatar #48 to #46 - lordmoldywart
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Want to take your own life? Fine.

Just don't ruin other people's lives while doing it, ie. like how this guy did, imagine how that truck driver would've felt if he'd killed the man.

I admit I approached my point aggressively, but it's the least someone as low as that deserves, trying to pull that **** on a random, innocent civilian
User avatar #50 to #48 - ffx
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
What makes him low? Maybe he didn't think it through? Have you ever been depressed man? I don't think so. Let me give you an idea. When you're depressed, you don't think things through properly, your judgement and perception gets clouded, everything begins to become meaningless and you begin not to care. Not because you choose to not care for no reason, but because by not caring it makes the pain just slightly less dull. I'm not here to try to change you, that's your own choice. I'm just trying to inform you that my opinion on your reaction doesn't seem as the best way. What if you manage to be depressed as much as this man? You just decide life completely sucks and you want to end it right now but have nothing around to kill yourself except that truck. You think getting whacked on the forehead with a wrench will make it better? No, in fact it'll motivate you to kill himself more. You'll just go home and finish the job with anything you find at home.
User avatar #54 to #50 - lordmoldywart
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
I don't care how low you get, there is no reason EVER to bring innocent people into your problems

You deserve all the hate in the world if you do that
#9 to #7 - anon id: e196efb3
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
No you wouldn't, i bet you're a typical nerdy middle-class white american who wears glasses and works in an office or school, you cant hurt anyone you soft cunt.
User avatar #60 to #9 - imnotkickthecat
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
What the **** did you just ******* say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ******* words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ******. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re ******* dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ******* tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re ******* dead, kiddo.
#41 to #9 - anon id: 1943d2b5
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
And I bet you too are the same person you stereotyped, you soft cunt.
#35 to #9 - anon id: e4ec637f
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Man white people have been so mean since they became the new minority.
User avatar #10 to #9 - lordmoldywart
Reply -24 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Never have I seen such a misjudged characterisation. I'm a mechanic, so I'd probably use my 10" iron to beat him with, and you for being a daft prick while I'm at it

Get out from behind your anonymity, pussy
User avatar #47 to #10 - ffx
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Yes, use a weapon to beat some sense out of a depressed person. Because he's so much of a threat to you, you can't use your hands. Seeing these 2 posts of yours I'm beginning to think you're a troll, like come on no one can be this arrogant.... If you aren't a troll, I recommend spaying yourself.
User avatar #49 to #47 - lordmoldywart
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
A tire iron would do much more damage than my fists, but with less effort from myself. He doesn't deserve punches, he deserves to be beaten with as little effort as possible

Low-life scum trying to ruin another person's life (the truck driver's, it's obvious you haven't watched the video anyway). You're just another generic 'oh nooo don't blame the depressed person, imagine what he's gone through'. Go **** yourself, you socially inept coward
User avatar #51 to #49 - ffx
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Yes man, please resort to swearing. It shows your actual intelligence. Oh I'm a coward? Says who, you? You're just a mechanic. Be a police officer in New York, and work more hours than I do. I work the worst shifts (overnight). Do that and you have my permission to call me a coward.
#53 to #51 - lordmoldywart
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#11 to #10 - anon id: e196efb3
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Need to use a weapon faggot, also what would using an account do to make me tougher? Dont thumb me down bro please no ill do anything.
User avatar #12 to #11 - sixfivefourtwoone
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
For once, Anon was not a faggot and completely correct.
User avatar #13 to #11 - lordmoldywart
Reply -17 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Why waste my knuckles on this piece of trash in the video? Let me guess, you're a kick boxer right, or a martial artist? You'd never need to use a weapon....Nope, probably just a 12 year old sat at home on his computer acting tough knowing that he can't be traced because of his anonymity.
User avatar #21 to #13 - garaichu
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
"Traced".
Hah!
Why don't you trace me instead? Pretend I'm him, take it out on me.

Seriously, stop being such a tremendous douchenozzle, no one likes a douchenozzle.
User avatar #22 to #21 - lordmoldywart
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
How am I being a douchenozzle in the first place?

Want to take your own life? Fine. Just don't ruin other people's lives while doing it, ie. like how this guy did, imagine how that truck driver would've felt if he'd killed the man.

I don't see what's wrong with that point, I approached it aggressively I'll admit, but the anon started being a cunt by sticking up for the guy in the video - which I found amazing, I didn't know the stereotype about anons being socially-inept was true....
User avatar #30 to #22 - charkoal
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
While I agree with your point, I see no need for you to turn the cuntwad meter up to 11.
User avatar #40 to #30 - lordmoldywart
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
If my cuntwad meter was at 11, the anon was at 15
User avatar #32 to #21 - mussyo
Reply -4 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
This comment alone is correct, faunnyjunk don't like it when you disagree with them. I agree with this comment however.
#16 to #7 - ctenop
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Wow, he's so depressed and in such a bad place he is desperate to take his life.... "L0L faggit 1v1 ******* asshole"   
A lot of cunts in this world, you're one of the bigger ones...
Wow, he's so depressed and in such a bad place he is desperate to take his life.... "L0L faggit 1v1 ******* asshole"
A lot of cunts in this world, you're one of the bigger ones...
User avatar #20 to #16 - lordmoldywart
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
Want to take your own life? Fine.

Just don't ruin other people's lives while doing it, ie. like how this guy did, imagine how that truck driver would've felt if he'd killed the man.

It's as if you lot didn't even watch the freakin' video
#36 - desa
Reply +10 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
His face after.
User avatar #2 - happygrowman
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
bad luck brian tries to suicide, the truck stops and he get sued for life insurance fraud
#6 to #2 - Barinade
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(03/19/2013) [-]
My Skype pic, lol.