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#106 - hateandwhiskey (01/26/2012) [-]
I realize that you have BARELY ANY comments on your profile.

Allow me to not be an asshole for a while, and change that.
#107 to #108 - thepandaofdarkness (01/26/2012) [-]
Oh why thank you :D
#108 to #109 - hateandwhiskey (01/26/2012) [-]
Yes, yes, I tend to be more generous than I'd like.

Well, while I'm here...how are you, and ****.
#109 to #110 - thepandaofdarkness (01/26/2012) [-]
I'm fine. Well as fine as a person spiraling downward into insanity can be. How about you?
#110 to #111 - hateandwhiskey (01/26/2012) [-]
If that's the case, I'm hoping we'll get along just fine.

Looking past everything else that's horribly wrong with my world, I'm...alright.
#111 to #112 - thepandaofdarkness (01/26/2012) [-]
well its better to be alright then to be dead. Whats been going on in your life? Anything good?
#112 to #113 - hateandwhiskey (01/26/2012) [-]
Lately, not really. But I don't whine, I don't complain. Regret, maybe, but at least I'm not a bitch. That's something.

Though, it's a long story really. Especially for someone I've barely gotten to know. I just Hate adding someone and never talking to them again. Kinda defeats the purpose, y'know?
#113 to #114 - thepandaofdarkness (01/26/2012) [-]
Thats very true. I've been dealing with a few people at school who have decided to target me as a outlet for their own insecurity. And recently a few younger kids have been modling themselves after me. While flattering, its a bit unsettling and saddening. I wish they would get better role models. A hopeless insane freak isnt the best person to model yourself after.
#114 to #115 - hateandwhiskey (01/26/2012) [-]
Hell, you sound too much like me right now. My little brother can't help but carve a Hero out of me, and I've been trying to convince him about how much of a bad idea being like me is. I don't want him to live a life like I did. I don't want him doing the things I do.

There don't need to be another me. And it'll take a long time to explain all that to you.

As for the getting picked on thing, that's not really much of a problem for me. Since my first fight back in my Freshman year, people tend to leave me alone. And that's just how I like it.
#115 to #116 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
Sadly where I live, people dont like to fight fair. I've tried and always gotten my ass kicked. After a few black eyes and broken noses, i learned to just keep quiet. Recently though i've been writing pretty amazing...Well not exactly stories, more of muses. But they're true either way. When i finish typing my most recent one, i'll send you a link to read it. If you would like.
#116 to #117 - hateandwhiskey (01/27/2012) [-]
I Hate how rare it is to find a girl that can fight. And, y'know, know what she's talking about.

But I know what you mean about 'fighting fair'. The fight I was referring to the first time I ever been stabbed, let alone 4 times. I don't enjoy being stabbed. That actually made me quite furious.

And yes, I'd like that. Maybe whenever I can get back on drawing ****, I'll show you.
#117 to #118 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
Oh sounds fun. Here is the link to my muse. www.wattpad.com/3259905-you... I have a lot of other works you can look at too.
#118 to #119 - hateandwhiskey (01/27/2012) [-]
I liked the part where you said my name-...I mean, Hate. Yeah.

I'm willing to see whatever you have to offer. I think it's a pleasant change from looking at my own works or listening to myself talk even moreso, seeing as how my bearded-dragon virtually killed itself. But, once again, long story.

Hell, I have a few drawings saved on my laptop, if show-and-tell's still on.
#119 to #120 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
I would love to see them. I have lots of my own works you might be interested in. Including a few about JTHM. Its called Johnny and his daughter. Its quite sad really. The main character is my own creation. Out of my own image. Its quite sad and actually a bit heart-warming.
#120 to #121 - hateandwhiskey (01/27/2012) [-]
Goddammit, stop being so much like me.

****, I have to find something relevant. I guess I'll just start from my folder of reaction pictures I used to make.

Granted, resolution is low as **** thanks to an 8.0 megapixel phone camera. I'll be sure to rectify all that when I get it back.

#121 to #122 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
Heh sorry. those who connect eventually find eachother. And thats really good. I really like it. I would love to see more of your drawings whenever you can. One story of mine that you may like is this: www.wattpad.com/3260262-the... You might enjoy it.
#122 to #123 - hateandwhiskey (01/27/2012) [-]
Ah I didn't mean it as a bad thing. More of a little inside joke with...an acquaintance of mine.

Oh, and I have, like, 50 of these things. Some of which involve suits. I ******* love drawing suits. And I'll get to reading it right away, when I have the time.
#123 to #124 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
Oh that is a great picture. Suits always look good, no matter who they're on. I sadly dont have any drawing talent. I'm lucky to have any writing talent. Its pretty much all I can do anymore. Cant sing, dance or draw. Or anything else for that matter. Lost most of those talents as i got older.
#124 to #125 - hateandwhiskey (01/27/2012) [-]
For the longest time, drawing was all I really had to do in my spare time, which would explain my progress. I never really took any classes or lessons outside of Art classes in school, which didn't really teach me ****.

'Nother suit.
#141 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/28/2012) [-]
Ah I see. I basically killed my father and my brother. See when i was young my mother used to beat me and abuse me. She would choke me and kick me and pretty much hurt me any way she could. I used to cry, sit in my room, and barely eat. One day i found my brother convulsing in his room after overdosing on pills. I didn't call my dad fast enough and so he died in my arms. Then a year later my father couldn't take seeing me hurt and couldn't take my mother controlling his life. So he ended it. I walked in on him hanging from the rafters. But he had already been dead. My mom died in jail after a friend of mines dad arrested her for child abuse. My new family is ok. but my dad is an ass as i said before.
#142 to #143 - hateandwhiskey
(01/28/2012) [-]
Sometimes, the things in life can be a real bitch. It's wonder how I'm still alive. Sometimes, anyway.

But I'm never really one for depression. More akin to anger. I feel better that way. It's about the only emotion I ever show.
#139 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/28/2012) [-]
normally what keeps me awake is knowing that if i go to sleep, the nightmares return to haunt me and steal away more of my sanity. And my father is an asshole too, he tries making my life horrible. And sadly, most of the time he succeeds
#140 to #141 - hateandwhiskey
(01/28/2012) [-]
Well, I say that because he brought me into the world in bad blood. Through the first 7 years of my childhood, he reminded me about how much of an abomination I was to him. As the records show, the result of both a broken condom and a failed abortion.

Come the 8th year, I got sick of his ****. I didn't have many more options, but I knew I wasn't going to grow up with that rat bastard around. 'Round then, he'd already contracted throat cancer and Pneumonia, so that made it a bit easier for me.

Long story short, I killed my father. 8 years later, and I'm still paying for it. Along with the...'deaths' of two others.

It's brought me to not like myself very much.
#137 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/28/2012) [-]
Ah well thats good. I've tried drinking, but I've never acquired the taste for it. Smoking is easier for me then drinking. but anything i do to try and take away pain always ends up putting a knot in my stomach. Also, I detest sleep. I only get about a hour of it each night. I always wake up knowing i have better things to do.
#138 to #139 - hateandwhiskey
(01/28/2012) [-]
There's plenty of things that keep me awake, other than the fact that I'm a Monster addict.

Mostly my father. Long story about that asshole.

Other times, it's something in my head that ain't working right.

But overall, it's because I don't like sleep. It keeps me from doing more important things.
#135 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/28/2012) [-]
Oh, my condolences. Its never easy to bury something you truly love. I know from a bit too much past experience. Life hasn't been too nice to me. But I've learned to take The few good things that happen in my life and keep them close to my heart. So when the bad things come I have a bit of protection against them. Makes the emotional trauma less painful.
#136 to #137 - hateandwhiskey
(01/28/2012) [-]
I just drink, really. Specially seeing as how I haven't done so in a few days. Same could be said for sleeping, I was never a big fan of sleeping.

But I've gotten my mourning out of the way.
#133 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/28/2012) [-]
Very true. So how was your day? Mine was quite tiresome. Few kids tried fighting me, and a few middle schoolers tried asking me for cigarettes. Made me feel really bad for them. I hate when kids model themselves after people like me. And when kids try and grow up too fast. I did that and look where i've ended up.
#134 to #135 - hateandwhiskey
(01/28/2012) [-]
I can relate.

Though I'll probably hit the bottle before the smokes. That's what my brothers are around for.

Well, I started my day off with burying my pet - virtually one of the only things I didn't Hate in this world. The rest of it was rather dull, since I didn't have school today. I forget why, but I'm not one to question things like that.
#131 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
Sadly most of FJ are children. Or at least, they act that way.
#132 to #133 - hateandwhiskey
(01/27/2012) [-]
As well with the rest of the internet, but at the most you can associate yourself with those you relate to. That's something, though I don't know what.
#129 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
Oh no no. I've had it happen before. Just doesnt happen very often. Once most people find out i'm a girl on fj they start asking lots of questions and for pics and ****.
#130 to #131 - hateandwhiskey
(01/27/2012) [-]
That's usually how the internet works.

For children, anyway.
#127 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
Ah, I hate school too. So im the same way. Also its funny, we've been talking so long that we've gotten to too many purple lines
#128 to #129 - hateandwhiskey
(01/27/2012) [-]
You've never talked this long with the same person before?

You must be new here.
#125 to #126 - thepandaofdarkness (01/27/2012) [-]
I've taken lots of classes. But none of them ever taught me what i wanted to know. I once took a creative writing class. Did not end well. i just think then type up whats on my mind. Ends up good in the end.
#126 to #127 - hateandwhiskey
(01/27/2012) [-]
I've never really been a big fan of writing or reading, really. I always Hated school for too many reasons to count. Can't wait 'til I'm done with the ****.