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shrapnelleader

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Age: 24
Date Signed Up:1/31/2013
Last Login:6/24/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#16508
Highest Comment Rank:#118
Content Thumbs: 2 total,  0 ,  2
Comment Thumbs: 14886 total,  15222 ,  336
Content Level Progress: 3.38% (2/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 30.3% (303/1000)
Level 314 Comments: Wizard → Level 315 Comments: Wizard
Subscribers:0
Content Views:46
Total Comments Made:1054
FJ Points:14374

latest user's comments

#94 - It didn't really matter, though, because the game was already … 10/03/2013 on Amazing! 0
#14 - Seems legit. 10/03/2013 on Master of Disguise +13
#61 - Comment deleted  [+] (2 new replies) 10/03/2013 on Amazing! 0
User avatar #89 - piratechicken (10/03/2013) [-]
The penalty flag was thrown because he kicked the ball though.
User avatar #94 - shrapnelleader (10/03/2013) [-]
It didn't really matter, though, because the game was already lost at that point. This gif was the last few seconds of the game.
#17 - The timing of the song I'm listening to right now could NOT be… 10/02/2013 on Attack on Arin. +2
#2 - Above the law? I AM the law.  [+] (1 new reply) 10/02/2013 on safety first +4
User avatar #4 - usernamecannotload (10/03/2013) [-]
#6 - FITLER 10/02/2013 on From Hamburger, Germany +3
#5 - Comment deleted 10/02/2013 on From Hamburger, Germany 0
#67 - Game Grumps taught me well.  [+] (2 new replies) 10/02/2013 on Decisions +47
#114 - atma (10/02/2013) [-]
pic related: it's a Pumbloom
#77 - twobeanersonetaco (10/02/2013) [-]
My 7 year old brother chose to be a boy in Black 2, so I chose a girl so we could both get different Pokemon from the celebrity in Nimbasa City and trade. Pic kinda semi-in a way sorta relatably on topic for the most part.
#7 - Dis gon be good! 10/01/2013 on Crazy, waterbending, ex... +1
#6 - Comment deleted 10/01/2013 on Crazy, waterbending, ex... 0
#69 - Gotcha covered. 10/01/2013 on Coolest thing to waste my... +1
#9 - I know that, since I'm a Christian, I'm expected to get mad ov… 10/01/2013 on Well if he said so it must... +2
#11 - This moment broke my heart. I'm really hoping they co… 10/01/2013 on Some feels +6
#28 - One of my favorites.  [+] (3 new replies) 10/01/2013 on Coolest thing to waste my... +11
User avatar #74 - zenet (10/01/2013) [-]
That reminds me of the never ending stairway in Super Mario 64 if you didn't have enough stars to progress.
User avatar #67 - rainiar (10/01/2013) [-]
Anyone have the original without the text?
#69 - shrapnelleader (10/01/2013) [-]
Gotcha covered.
#7 - Nowadays, when I want to hear a video game review, I go to Ang… 09/29/2013 on GTA in real life +3
#2 - Picture 09/28/2013 on South Butt +17
#3 - Comment deleted  [+] (3 new replies) 09/28/2013 on Leka lekar 0
#21 - thenerdachi Comment deleted by shrapnelleader
#8 - peridot Comment deleted by shrapnelleader
#4 - thetom Comment deleted by shrapnelleader
#6 - "I'm going to use the glass door." - said n… 09/28/2013 on Trust +1
#16 - Thorny Dragon, meet the Horned Lizard from North America. …  [+] (3 new replies) 09/28/2013 on Australian Thorny Dragon +11
#48 - tonkkax (09/28/2013) [-]
God damn this makes me so grateful that women don't shoot period blood out of their you-know-whats.
User avatar #31 - egosumproxi (09/28/2013) [-]
"Ick factor"? "weirded out"? Wtf is wrong with Nat Geo narrators nowadays. I watched a documentary about man eating tigers in Bangladesh and the narrator sounded as if he had cystic fibrosis the entire way through the documentary with the amount of "dramatic pauses" he used. The narrator didn't say one sentence in the entire documentary where he didn't pause at least twice for effect. At least when Attenborough did that it was because he was about as close as he could get to bloody thing he was talking about, the narrator in the documentary I watched wasn't in a single shot.
#30 - askinnywhiteboy has deleted their comment.
#8 - She committed suicide by throwing herself into the sea and dis…  [+] (2 new replies) 09/26/2013 on Now you know. +4
User avatar #16 - useroftheLOLZ (09/27/2013) [-]
I seem to remember a really fucked up version where she gets her wish of having legs, but instead on getting legs, her tail just splits, or something like that, and the prince is cursed so that he will die, if she doesn't stop singing, but if she sings, she slowly kills her self... I don't know, it was just fucked up, I think it was the Grimm fairy tails version.

Oh yeah, sleeping beauty was raped in her sleep, gave birth, and didn't wake up until one of her children sucked on her finger, thinking it was a nipple, and ended up taking out the thorn that was poisoning her. You want to talk about a ruinedchildhood, look no further.
User avatar #10 - arkanios (09/27/2013) [-]
Ah, thank you kindly for the information.

Also, indeed it is rather bleak, but the Fox and the Hound seems to strike home for me more than the Little Mermaid does.
#2 - Picture 09/26/2013 on 2loopy4me +1
#6 - *I meant to write Andersen, not Anderson. 09/26/2013 on Now you know. +1
#5 - Hercules brutally murdered his children with arrows, with some…  [+] (36 new replies) 09/26/2013 on Now you know. +252
User avatar #144 - lot (09/27/2013) [-]
Actually, Pinocchio doesn't really die. They did turn him into a real boy, even in the original stories by Collodi.
#114 - erpetrich (09/27/2013) [-]
Original Pinocchio is depressing as hell, I had to read the original book in old fuck off Italian, it drags on for ages, Geppeto gets sick, Pinocchio is basically forced into slave labour, gets arrested a couple of times, he killed Jiminy Cricket in anger, but he comes back as a ghost anyway,and then he's hanged for being "too mischievous"
User avatar #110 - xXCorpitoXx (09/27/2013) [-]
From what i remember Hera hated all of Zeus's Human offspring so she used some spell on Hercules that enraged him making him kill his family. Then he had to do all these missions as recompence for what he did. After many years he finished his duties and started another family and Hera being a bitch did it again. More recompence. Hercules saves Olympus from Gaia's minions. Then he Becomes a Denizen of Olympus.
User avatar #104 - IamSofaKingdom (09/27/2013) [-]
Hercules was cursed by his mother Hera into seeing his family as monsters and didn't realize it was his family until after they were dead and Ariel didn't commit suicide, she turned into sea foam and was forced to live in lament forever.
User avatar #126 - TheCanadianPatriot (09/27/2013) [-]
Hera wasn't his mother. His mother was human making him a demi-god. Hera just hated all of Zues' demi-god children and proceeded to do what you said she did.
User avatar #179 - IamSofaKingdom (09/27/2013) [-]
Yea, sorry I worded it poorly. She is the step mother of sorts since she is the official wife of Zeus but yea I knew Hercules was part human. Nearly every character in that mythology is an offspring of Zeus' flirtatious encounters and rapes.
#56 - gerfox (09/27/2013) [-]
I have some other facts about the Grimm adventures.

The original Sleeping Beauty. The first Grimm edition involved princes trying to reach her and dying from loss of blood trying to reach her through bushes of thorns (I have no clue what that's called in English). A previous edition of this tale was however depiced by Giambattista Basile in the 1630s. Here Sleeping Beauty gets a splinter in her finger, causing her to fall asleep. Then she gets raped by a King who's passing by while she is sleeping. She is impregnated and later gives birth to twins, one of them thinking the splinter is a nipple and sucking it out - thus making Sleeping Beauty awake.

Soon enough the Queen notices that the King has been cheating on her, and she orders the royal chef to kill, cook, and serve the two bastard sons to the king - and she also wishes to burn Sleeping Beauty alive. (However, the King notices, kills the Queen. Then he and Sleeping Beauty lived happily ever after).

A lot of these stories have really horrific earlier versions.
In a depiction of Little Red Riding Hood by Charles Perrault the wolf cooks grandma, and make sausages out of her, which he forces LRRH to eat - and flush it down with wine made out of her Grandmas blood.

In Cinderella her step sisters cut off parts of their feet to fit in the shoe in earlier versions, and in Snow White her own mother envy her beauty so much that she orders a hunter to kill her and bring back her liver and lungs so that she can eat them.
User avatar #159 - wtfduud (09/27/2013) [-]
The Snow White story is pretty similar to the original, but that might be because the movie is like 90 years old, reality was harsher back then.
#150 - ojezcola (09/27/2013) [-]
No, the original story of Girmm's "Little Red Riding Hood", at least in my collection of the Grimm's Fairy Tales, the Wolf eats both the Grandmother and Red, the Hunter passing by the cottage hears the wolf snoring, breaks into the house, and sees a wolf with a huge belly and thinks: "That wolf ate the old lady who lives here!". He cuts open the wolfs stomach and pulls the Grand Mother and Little Red out. While the wolf is still asleep, Grandma then tells Red to go and gathers some rocks and she will then fill the wolf's belly with them and sew him back up. When the Wolf wakes up he knows something is up. *ahem* He can... feel it in his gut. Frightened, he runs away and is weighed down by the rocks and dies in the forest.

A year latter, Red's doing the same thing going to grandmas house, but while visiting, a new wolf jumps onto the roof to try and eat Red when she leaves. The Grandma instructs Little Red to taunt the Wolf to come down and just eat her already, but to come down the side of the cottage that has a trough with leftover hot oil she had used earlier to cook some sausages. The plan works and the wolf if cooked alive.

The one about Cinderella is true. The step-sisters could not fit their feet into the shoe and the step-mother tells them to cut off a part of their heels so they would fit saying, "When you are a queen, you will not need to walk again.". Also, the dumb Prince fell for this... twice. A bird flies in and lands by a window and tells him "Don't you see? There is blood on her foot! She has cut off part so she could be Queen!"
#176 - gerfox (09/27/2013) [-]
Yeh, I knew about the other versions you mentioned as well - I read about these stories in a popular scientific magazine where I live, and they mentioned all these + some others

Also, in the original Hansel and Gretel the kids were left in the woods by their parents because they couldn't afford to have them anymore.

Damn, fairy tales can be harsh
#162 - danilorossetto (09/27/2013) [-]
the original Little Red Riding Hood is not from the Grimm Brothers, it's from Charles Perrault and he is right about the end... (and, in my interpretation (it is not explicit), the wolf has sex with her before killing her....)
The Grimm version came a hundread years AFTER the Perrault version.....
#165 - ojezcola (09/27/2013) [-]
User avatar #168 - instakill (09/27/2013) [-]
my mom used to tell me a version of Rapunzel back when I was very little as a bedtime story, one where Rapunzel was the daughter of two poor farmers, and when her mother is pregnant with her they didn't have any food, so the farmer stole a cabbage from the witches garden, and the witch found out so she made a deal that they can eat their fill of the witches garden however when the girl turned 3 she would be taken from her parents and live in servitude of the witch, thinking that in that time they would be able to outwit the witch they accept, and quickly forgot about the deal, and on Rapunzel's third birthday the witch came to collect her new servant, however the farmers had forgotten and quickly tried to attack the witch, which proved to be a bad idea since the witch killed them and took Rapunzel anyway, years passed and Rapunzel grew, however one day a prince was traveling in the woods, and when he heard Rapunzel sing he fell in love, so the two visited every day while the witch was away from the castle, however one day the witch came back early and caught the prince, throwing magic sand into his eyes causing them to melt from his skull, in retaliation Rapunzel uses her hair to strangle the witch to death and brings the prince on his horse back to the kingdom where they lived together for the rest of their lives
#177 - gerfox (09/27/2013) [-]
That's one I never heard before.

In one of the stories closer to the original he also is blinded, because the witch pushes him off the tower and into a bush of thorns - however, the tears of Rapunzel heals him and gives him his sight back.

In the original however, they address forbidden sex - where the prince and Rapunzel live for a long time happily in the tower. However, one day the witch comes along and Rapunzel mentions her pregnancy by mistake. "How come the clothes doesn't fit anymore".
User avatar #178 - instakill (09/27/2013) [-]
yeah, but it doesn't suprise me that she told me stories like that
User avatar #52 - DWalk (09/27/2013) [-]
Could anyone provide a source to these? I've never heard of any of these variations
User avatar #151 - nogphille (09/27/2013) [-]
just look up the original writers, grimm or andersen..
User avatar #48 - mrbuu (09/27/2013) [-]
cinderela's sisters cut off thier toes to fit into the glass slipper. in beauty and the beast. is somewhat accurate except her two sisters where turned to stone because they never saw the beauty on the inside like she did on beast.
User avatar #43 - buddhadom (09/27/2013) [-]
Pinocchio didn't die as he was made from wood... He was just hanging there until a lady puts him down i read the book in primary and i don't remember who the lady was but I think she dies as well at some point
User avatar #36 - TheFixer (09/27/2013) [-]
also didnt ariel have to murder someone to return to being a mermaid?
#53 - deckbox (09/27/2013) [-]
the prince, who ditched her for another girl. tbh woulda done it the cunt.
User avatar #19 - painispleasure (09/27/2013) [-]
the Hunchback of Notre Dame, the woman was murdered, by the villian, and the hunch back went to her tomb, and stayed there till he starved, and was found as a skeleton.
#15 - whatamidoingwithme (09/27/2013) [-]
Hercules was tricked by Hera to murder his family and after that he done so much deed to clean himself.
#14 - whatamidoingwithme (09/27/2013) [-]
Well Greek mythology is brutal. Hercules isn't really disney made you know.

However, what rustles me the most is the fact that they made Hades evil.
User avatar #82 - rockamekishiko (09/27/2013) [-]
i don't think any of them were made up by disney, they just made movies about them
#96 - jakols (09/27/2013) [-]
None of the stories were originally made by Disney.
Disney rewrote the ending of the stories they liked to make it Child friendly and then proceeded to make movies of them.
Almost every Disney movie like that (not counting mickey mouse, Donald an co.) is based on stories from mythology or stories that was written hundreds of years ago, to bring new life to old tales.
Tarzan, The little Mermaid, Pinocchio, The Hunchback and Pocahontas just to take a few of them, were all originally written between the 1700s to the 1850s.

gif semirelated
#12 - Rascal (09/27/2013) [-]
Well the only reason Hercules murdered his children was he was poisoned by Hera. I know its still not PG, but he was never portrayed as wicked. Thus the labors and whatnot
User avatar #11 - thebestpieever (09/27/2013) [-]
Let us not forget that Hercules then gouged his eyes out.
User avatar #105 - IamSofaKingdom (09/27/2013) [-]
Are you thinking of Oedipus?
User avatar #175 - thebestpieever (09/27/2013) [-]
No, Hercules did too. Right after killing his children and Megara.
#9 - CHODYTHEBLAKGUY (09/27/2013) [-]
everything I grew up loving is all a lie!
User avatar #7 - arkanios (09/26/2013) [-]
I thought that Ariel was turned into sea foam and was cursed to do good deeds for a long amount of time, but a child's tears adds a day to her time.

I'm assuming there's more than one version of the Little Mermaid book?
User avatar #8 - shrapnelleader (09/26/2013) [-]
She committed suicide by throwing herself into the sea and dissolving into sea foam. You're also thinking Andersen's tale.

However, there was another "mermaid" story that most likely inspired "The Little Mermaid" called "Undine," which was written by Friedrich de la Motte Fouqué (1811). In that story, Undine, a water spirit, is forced to kill the prince. She also commits suicide.

Bleak, ain't it?
User avatar #16 - useroftheLOLZ (09/27/2013) [-]
I seem to remember a really fucked up version where she gets her wish of having legs, but instead on getting legs, her tail just splits, or something like that, and the prince is cursed so that he will die, if she doesn't stop singing, but if she sings, she slowly kills her self... I don't know, it was just fucked up, I think it was the Grimm fairy tails version.

Oh yeah, sleeping beauty was raped in her sleep, gave birth, and didn't wake up until one of her children sucked on her finger, thinking it was a nipple, and ended up taking out the thorn that was poisoning her. You want to talk about a ruinedchildhood, look no further.
User avatar #10 - arkanios (09/27/2013) [-]
Ah, thank you kindly for the information.

Also, indeed it is rather bleak, but the Fox and the Hound seems to strike home for me more than the Little Mermaid does.
User avatar #6 - shrapnelleader (09/26/2013) [-]
*I meant to write Andersen, not Anderson.
#5 - Dog's face when he finds a cat... 09/26/2013 on Hide your cats +1
#5 - This is one of the things I miss about childhood. You could fi… 09/26/2013 on Nothing to see here, move... +3
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #2 - thatoldhorse ONLINE (04/23/2013) [-]
you look nice in that picture of you from 2009
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