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ritzrules

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Date Signed Up:10/21/2010
Last Login:7/06/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Ranking:#7778
Comment Ranking:#1199
Highest Content Rank:#4674
Highest Comment Rank:#439
Content Thumbs: 522 total,  809 ,  287
Comment Thumbs: 15243 total,  16366 ,  1123
Content Level Progress: 20% (2/10)
Level 44 Content: Sammich eater → Level 45 Content: Sammich eater
Comment Level Progress: 11.1% (111/1000)
Level 312 Comments: Wizard → Level 313 Comments: Wizard
Subscribers:1
Content Views:57791
Times Content Favorited:25 times
Total Comments Made:2983
FJ Points:12572
Favorite Tags: Go (3) | Business (2) | it (2) | tags (2) | You (2) | your (2)

latest user's comments

#3 - JOHN CENA 06/28/2015 on Deez Nuts +2
#254 - Girlfrand, high school marching band, her mom asked me to give… 06/28/2015 on Do you have a girlfrand? +1
#84 - ************ 06/27/2015 on Tootsie Pop 0
#101 - Oh look 06/25/2015 on how i feel when playing... +4
#23 - educate yourselves 06/25/2015 on Newborn snake +37
#9 - thank mr skeltal 06/25/2015 on I loved this Show +1
#86 - Go back to Python fucboi 06/25/2015 on homers a genius 0
#5 - hollaback girl had me like 06/22/2015 on Stealing Cars +16
#26 - Picture  [+] (1 new reply) 06/22/2015 on Nice +1
#35 - AnonsForSure (06/22/2015) [-]
#21 - That's why my parents made it a rule to not have phones out at… 06/22/2015 on That's sad 0
#16 - Apparently the guy who founded TED Talks is the father of one … 06/21/2015 on 25 Killer Websites that... 0
#30 - fluffy milk horse 06/21/2015 on Aww Yiss Cow +2
#137 - THIS is what curvy means 06/21/2015 on Dear Tumblr, THIS is what... +1
#36 - He's either playing NBA 2K12 or watching tv in his room. If he… 06/20/2015 on Game of Thrones Pin Up Girls 0
#35 - I don't know. I'm really paranoid he'll walk by and hear me. T… 06/20/2015 on Game of Thrones Pin Up Girls 0
#34 - He wasn't for a while. When he came back I thought that meant …  [+] (1 new reply) 06/20/2015 on Game of Thrones Pin Up Girls 0
#37 - micekill (06/20/2015) [-]
also, true bonding comes from understanding
true understanding means he knows you and knows he also is somewhat like you
first, masturbate silently
next day, talk about what type of chicks you like
next time masturbate very loud
then ask him how he was the day before
finally go to his room and tell him "i gotta show you this" use your before aquired information to find the best porn for him and masturbate to it in front of him, he will be forced to participate or else he would make things awkward
#21 - Look ************ , I'm housesitting for my girlfriend's…  [+] (7 new replies) 06/20/2015 on Game of Thrones Pin Up Girls -3
#30 - micekill (06/20/2015) [-]
why are you housesitting if her older brother is there?
User avatar #34 - ritzrules (06/20/2015) [-]
He wasn't for a while. When he came back I thought that meant I was supposed to leave. But they want me to stay until everyone gets home.

When I'm not here in a bed, I'm in my friend's run-down house on a really shitty futon. I think they're letting me stay out of pity.
#37 - micekill (06/20/2015) [-]
also, true bonding comes from understanding
true understanding means he knows you and knows he also is somewhat like you
first, masturbate silently
next day, talk about what type of chicks you like
next time masturbate very loud
then ask him how he was the day before
finally go to his room and tell him "i gotta show you this" use your before aquired information to find the best porn for him and masturbate to it in front of him, he will be forced to participate or else he would make things awkward
User avatar #29 - saxong (06/20/2015) [-]
How loud do you even jerk it that people can hear you 2 rooms over?
User avatar #35 - ritzrules (06/20/2015) [-]
I don't know. I'm really paranoid he'll walk by and hear me. These doors are thin.
User avatar #23 - pedokuma (06/20/2015) [-]
masturbate when he masturbate, his noise will cover yours
User avatar #36 - ritzrules (06/20/2015) [-]
He's either playing NBA 2K12 or watching tv in his room. If he is, I can't tell.
#19 - 's cute tho  [+] (1 new reply) 06/20/2015 on Me too +20
#25 - newdevyx (06/20/2015) [-]
#45 - I know all about that food, man. HEB-brand was killer. 06/20/2015 on Random Comp 0
#43 - I live in KY right now. We have Kroger, and it's such a huge s… 06/20/2015 on Random Comp 0
#88 - working security at the kentucky derby, a woman asked to see J… 06/20/2015 on Boring celebrity encounters +1
#34 - Silly name aside, I ******* love HEB. That place is awe…  [+] (5 new replies) 06/20/2015 on Random Comp 0
User avatar #44 - PFCMadness (06/20/2015) [-]
Working at HEB has provided me with a strange sensation: I think it's called... satisfaction? Being actually appreciated for my work?

It's surreal. Also, the food is much better.
User avatar #45 - ritzrules (06/20/2015) [-]
I know all about that food, man. HEB-brand was killer.
User avatar #43 - ritzrules (06/20/2015) [-]
I live in KY right now. We have Kroger, and it's such a huge step down. No homemade tortillas, our beef comes from much further away, things only got better when they built a Wal-Mart right next door so now there's a bunch of new stuff. Still not the same.

AND THERE ARE STILL NO MEXICAN LADIES MAKING FRESH TORTILLAS. WE ARE ABLE TO HIRE PROFESSIONAL SUSHI CHEFS FROM JAPAN BUT NO TORTILLA-MAKING GODDESSES
#37 - alarubra (06/20/2015) [-]
I lived in GA with my dad for a while. The equivalent there was Publix. It was not the same. Not even close.
#36 - alarubra (06/20/2015) [-]
Yeah, it's a wonderful store.
#197 - I'm an American and a civilian with military family. I have no… 06/20/2015 on Job Experiences - London... 0
#795 - **ritzrules used "*roll picture*"** **ritzrules rolled image ** 06/19/2015 on *roll picture* to fight off... 0
#25 - "Cover all 9000 taste buds..." 06/19/2015 on Howling Wolf Mouse +6

items

Total unique items point value: 550 / Total items point value: 650
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #19 - SirVladimir (02/15/2015) [-]
Only commenting here because I used to go to Berea and you're one town over. To think we could have been friends...
User avatar #20 to #19 - ritzrules (02/15/2015) [-]
Well. I only live in Richmond right now because I go to EKU.

Before that I lived in Louisville, KY; Abilene/San Antonio/Houson/Austin, TX; and Suffolk, VA. I've been to 10 different schools before graduating from high school in Louisville.

So yeah, our chances of meeting were slim to none.

But I've been to Berea once. Nice place.
#17 - giffythetoad (01/01/2015) [-]
Doot doot, 			************		  I loved your godzilla one. Thank you for sharing :3  Also I mistakenly thought dogziller was you, so he got some doot too.
Doot doot, ************ I loved your godzilla one. Thank you for sharing :3 Also I mistakenly thought dogziller was you, so he got some doot too.
User avatar #18 to #17 - ritzrules (01/01/2015) [-]
's alright. he got the godzilla version.

doot the **** outa that doot.
User avatar #15 - gugek (11/22/2014) [-]
Good morning! I hope you have a fantastic day my friend .
User avatar #16 to #15 - ritzrules (11/23/2014) [-]
Thank you, my good man.
#14 - datgrass (06/25/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#10 - anon (02/16/2014) [-]
**anonymous rolls 96** 19
#9 - anon (02/16/2014) [-]
u r useless
User avatar #8 - ritzrules (06/25/2013) [-]
**ritzrules rolled a random comment #3937048 posted by MrMysteriousMagic at MMORPG ITEM COLLECTIVE EXPERIENCE ** :
quick poll guys goo.gl/i0ZZ7
User avatar #7 - ritzrules (06/25/2013) [-]
**ritzrules rolled user bladeboy **
#6 - ittroll **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#1 - BakaGirl (11/25/2010) [-]
Who rules?
User avatar #2 to #1 - Dymentia (12/08/2010) [-]
I thought the same thing.
User avatar #3 to #2 - ritzrules (12/08/2010) [-]
wat?
#4 to #3 - Dymentia (12/08/2010) [-]
Rittz from Boxer Hockey.
Your name made me think of him, and I think she thought the same thing.
User avatar #5 to #4 - ritzrules (12/08/2010) [-]
hmm
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