Home Original Content Funny Pictures Funny GIFs YouTube Funny Text Funny Movies Channels Search
Buy your amazon goods through FJ's link.
Just click this link and search for any product you want. FJ gets a 6% commission on everything you buy.

niceguyguy    

Rank #14152 on Comments
niceguyguy Avatar Level 213 Comments: Comedic Genius
Offline
Send mail to niceguyguy Block niceguyguy Invite niceguyguy to be your friend flag avatar
Last status update:
-
Personal Info
Gender: male
Consoles Owned: PS3
Video Games Played: Red Alert, TF2,Gmod,Left 4 Dead
Interests: Cooking, Exercise, Anime,
Date Signed Up:1/10/2012
Last Login:8/20/2014
Location:Location Location
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#14152
Highest Content Rank:#4683
Highest Comment Rank:#5600
Content Thumbs: 396 total,  506 ,  110
Comment Thumbs: 1400 total,  1573 ,  173
Content Level Progress: 40% (4/10)
Level 39 Content: Peasant → Level 40 Content: Sammich eater
Comment Level Progress: 20% (20/100)
Level 213 Comments: Comedic Genius → Level 214 Comments: Comedic Genius
Subscribers:1
Content Views:35056
Times Content Favorited:49 times
Total Comments Made:768
FJ Points:1768
Welcome to my profile, looking Fuhrer good time? You came to the Reich place!

Show:
Sort by:
Order:

funny text/links

Show:
Sort by:
Order:

funny pictures

  • Views: 24350
    Thumbs Up 397 Thumbs Down 67 Total: +330
    Comments: 35
    Favorites: 44
    Uploaded: 09/06/13
    The longer you stare, the funnier it get The longer you stare, the...
  • Views: 2668
    Thumbs Up 27 Thumbs Down 5 Total: +22
    Comments: 1
    Favorites: 1
    Uploaded: 02/11/14
    Well If You Insist Well If You Insist
  • Views: 1459
    Thumbs Up 33 Thumbs Down 14 Total: +19
    Comments: 5
    Favorites: 0
    Uploaded: 04/22/12
    Guess who! Guess who!
  • Views: 825
    Thumbs Up 6 Thumbs Down 1 Total: +5
    Comments: 0
    Favorites: 0
    Uploaded: 12/14/13
    Dick Caught In Zip Dick Caught In Zip
  • Views: 574
    Thumbs Up 7 Thumbs Down 11 Total: -4
    Comments: 0
    Favorites: 0
    Uploaded: 05/05/12
    Meanwhile On 9fag Meanwhile On 9fag
Show:
Sort by:
Order:

funny gifs

latest user's comments

#366 - New series that I was able to make due to a friend gifting me … 9 hours ago on niceguyguy's profile 0
#16 - Looks like the dad couldn't either. 08/09/2014 on monster in the closet +26
#164 - I only stuck with the Red Alert and Tiberian series myself wou…  [+] (2 new replies) 08/07/2014 on What games have aged... 0
User avatar #1396 - SirMartin (08/07/2014) [-]
Yeah. It is the most serious C&C game. But still really fun to play
#782 - rothingham (08/07/2014) [-]
Meh, It's okay I guess. But Red Alert 2 was (imo) the best c&c.
#360 - Big Update Hi guys long time, first thing is. …  [+] (5 new replies) 08/07/2014 on niceguyguy's profile 0
User avatar #365 - muffinzexe (08/07/2014) [-]
NIce, I will support it.
User avatar #364 - tiagodisouza (08/07/2014) [-]
awesome man
User avatar #363 - feelythefeel (08/07/2014) [-]
Jeez, that's some serious commitment. Go get 'em.
User avatar #362 - sonnyboii (08/07/2014) [-]
Sounds coolio
User avatar #361 - MrDeadiron (08/07/2014) [-]
I believe in you.
#113 - I could argue any command and conquer game that was developed …  [+] (7 new replies) 08/07/2014 on What games have aged... +9
#1060 - anonymous (08/07/2014) [-]
Top 3: 1.Tiberian Sun
2. C&C 3:Tiberium Wars
3. Red Alert 2

On a different note, C&C 4: Tiberium Twilight? Fuck you EA.
User avatar #979 - wunderlichh (08/07/2014) [-]
Tiberian sun and red alert 2
But I also enjoyed "Earth 2140" and "Total annihilation" as non-westwood RTS games, they were also very enjoyable and spent lots and lots of time in those games.
#793 - ghostp (08/07/2014) [-]
Red Alert 2/YR

Didn't like Red alert 3 that much.
User avatar #120 - SirMartin (08/07/2014) [-]
Generels !!!!
User avatar #164 - niceguyguy (08/07/2014) [-]
I only stuck with the Red Alert and Tiberian series myself would you recommend it?
User avatar #1396 - SirMartin (08/07/2014) [-]
Yeah. It is the most serious C&C game. But still really fun to play
#782 - rothingham (08/07/2014) [-]
Meh, It's okay I guess. But Red Alert 2 was (imo) the best c&c.
#292 - Comment deleted 08/04/2014 on Free 1600 XBOX points 0
#33 - You and me both brother. You stay classy you adorable hunk of a man. 08/04/2014 on Playing Dwarf Fortress +1
#74 - Comment deleted 08/04/2014 on get shit done 0
#19 - When necromancers come and you forgot about a pile of corpses.  [+] (2 new replies) 08/04/2014 on Playing Dwarf Fortress +13
#24 - harrywarden (08/04/2014) [-]
I used to dump all the corpses that I had outside in a big pile, until a necromancer attacked. Now I use the airlock system.
#33 - niceguyguy (08/04/2014) [-]
You and me both brother. You stay classy you adorable hunk of a man.
#18 - It's alright, it took me a good week to get used to the contro… 08/04/2014 on Playing Dwarf Fortress +1

user's channels

Join Subscribe gif-channel
Join Subscribe morbid-channel
Join Subscribe ragecomics
Join Subscribe skyrim
Show:
Sort by:
Order:

items

Total unique items point value: 3050 / Total items point value: 3300

Comments(351):

 

Show All Replies Show Shortcuts
Per page:
Order:
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #366 - niceguyguy (9 hours ago) [-]
New series that I was able to make due to a friend gifting me the game. Papers please!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=iu_uxyUOY28&feature=youtu.be

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #360 - niceguyguy (08/07/2014) [-]
Big Update

Hi guys long time, first thing is.

I'm looking to take youtube more seriously and start producing some high-quality content. By that I don't mean me shouting "Oh baby its a triple!" But providing some well edited and decent commentary. I'm going to uploading the mass amount of videos that I have pre-recorded in the coming weeks to give me some time to work on another project.

I'm going to be making a community channel with a close friend of mine. We're currently in the stages of setting up an office and decking it out with some professional equipment. We're talking anechoic foam, custom built PCs and some proper microphones for the job.

At the moment the channel has not been made as we're not looking to upload anything until the office is fixed up and we can produce some good content. However I intend to keep you guys updated on the progress. I will continue to make videos on my own channel so you'll all experience dwarf fortress still.

Thanks for the support and constructive feedback you have all given me. I hope to entertain you all soon.

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #365 to #360 - muffinzexe (08/07/2014) [-]
NIce, I will support it.
User avatar #364 to #360 - tiagodisouza (08/07/2014) [-]
awesome man
User avatar #363 to #360 - feelythefeel (08/07/2014) [-]
Jeez, that's some serious commitment. Go get 'em.
User avatar #362 to #360 - sonnyboii (08/07/2014) [-]
Sounds coolio
User avatar #361 to #360 - MrDeadiron (08/07/2014) [-]
I believe in you.
User avatar #348 - niceguyguy (06/12/2014) [-]
Currently working on dwarf fortress episodes at the moment, meanwhile enjoy some space engineers!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUx1HpEta2w

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #352 to #348 - muffinzexe (06/12/2014) [-]
It's fun to watch. MORE!
User avatar #353 to #352 - niceguyguy (06/12/2014) [-]
Thanks man, will make more for you guys, if it made anyone laugh it's all worth it
User avatar #357 to #353 - muffinzexe (06/13/2014) [-]
Yeah, it's fun to watch, I love your videos and your jokes are funny.
Can I become a weaponsmith?
User avatar #358 to #357 - niceguyguy (06/13/2014) [-]
Sure man, you're currently a fisherdwarf so when you're not supplying the fortress with fresh fish I'm going to make you work the forge to make us some kickass weapons. Make them sharp because I want to make a pile of goblin limbs for the kids to play in.
User avatar #359 to #358 - muffinzexe (06/14/2014) [-]
Alrighty then, will be done.
#351 to #348 - kosmic ONLINE (06/12/2014) [-]
Love your voice and videos brochacho
#354 to #351 - niceguyguy (06/12/2014) [-]
Well, I love you! Yeah that was pretty Alpha of me, today I become a man!
User avatar #350 to #348 - feelythefeel (06/12/2014) [-]
Thanks.
User avatar #355 to #350 - niceguyguy (06/12/2014) [-]
Anytime man! Thanks for watching
#356 to #349 - niceguyguy (06/12/2014) [-]
I love David Mitchell. And I love you bbe ;)
I love David Mitchell. And I love you bbe ;)
User avatar #345 - niceguyguy (05/21/2014) [-]
Hi guys!

Not dead just yet! Finals are almost over so I can start making more videos! Which also involves teaching you how to play dwarf fortress! Look out for videos to come!

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #346 to #345 - tiagodisouza (05/21/2014) [-]
Guess i need to redownload it because i kinda miss playign it
User avatar #347 to #346 - niceguyguy (05/21/2014) [-]
Here's the link should you need it: www.bay12forums.com/smf/?topic=59026.0
User avatar #343 - niceguyguy (04/30/2014) [-]
Episode 4 is here!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8H_p0CCjSI&feature=youtu.be

Any feedback/suggestions are welcome also town names!

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #344 to #343 - freedomreturns (04/30/2014) [-]
Damn dirty hippies.
User avatar #338 - niceguyguy (04/01/2014) [-]
Hi guys just a quick update, I hope to make a video for tomorrow if I feel well enough.

I have struggling from some mental issues **** lately as I have been on and off tablets so I'm trying my best for videos as they take a while to make due to the fact that dwarf fortress is a long game so it takes a while for something to happen. But fear not! I shall record our quest for glory for the mountain-homes!

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #341 to #338 - feferest (04/02/2014) [-]
Yo dont have to record
User avatar #340 to #338 - fillelindome (04/01/2014) [-]
Dont pressuree yourself to put out videos if you dont have the capacity to put them out.
User avatar #339 to #338 - MrDeadiron (04/01/2014) [-]
your beautiful even if your on drugs
User avatar #333 - niceguyguy (03/19/2014) [-]
Episode 3 is now up! www.youtube.com/watch?v=JMsrAohL1PA&feature=youtu.be

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
#334 to #333 - freedomreturns (03/19/2014) [-]
Maybe I am American, you wanna fight about it?
#329 - samous ONLINE (03/19/2014) [-]
#330 to #329 - niceguyguy (03/19/2014) [-]
Hello there, lad.
Hello there, lad.
#331 to #330 - samous ONLINE (03/19/2014) [-]
gib ur skip name and I might call
#332 to #331 - niceguyguy (03/19/2014) [-]
Same as the youtube. If I'm online I'll say hello.
User avatar #326 - niceguyguy (03/16/2014) [-]
No video today I'm afraid! University work has decided to be bothersome. Expect one next Wednesday, good news is that the holidays are coming! So plenty of videos will be made for you all.

I was thinking of making some project zomboid videos alongside dwarf fortress, what do you guys think?

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #327 to #326 - ghostninja ONLINE (03/16/2014) [-]
Sure on the zombiod. Doesn't it have mp?
User avatar #328 to #327 - niceguyguy (03/16/2014) [-]
Good good, I'll make a video on it asap, same schedule though. Wednesdays and Sundayswarf fortress, thinking of Fridays for other games. It does but it's in Alpha, tried to download it wouldn't work
User avatar #323 - niceguyguy (03/12/2014) [-]
It's here! We met some really polite traders this time around... nothing odd about them at all... nope!

Turn your volume up this time, there were some errors!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=HH2eyxWEVJE&feature=youtu.be

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #325 to #323 - feelythefeel (03/12/2014) [-]
Thanks.
User avatar #324 to #323 - desacabose (03/12/2014) [-]
This is lewd
User avatar #315 - niceguyguy (03/10/2014) [-]
Episode 2 is in the works, had to do work for uni and what not. However I have made a schedule for when videos will be released, here's the current schedule:

Wednesday: Dwarf fortress adventure mode! (This Wednesday I will release the fortress mode video)
Sunday: Dwarf fortress, fortress mode.

Games/projects for the future:
Project zomboid.
No more room in hell.
Civ v.
Medieval total war 2.
Guide for dwarf fortress.
Garrys mod.

Possible games for the future:
Towns.
WoW
Planet side 2.
Left 4 dead 2

I love involving you guys in my games and I like getting feedback from you all. At this point in time I'm going to do the fortress and adventure modes on dwarf fortress, hopefully in the future I'll branch out to other games. I would love to make videos with you guys as well so if you want to join me on anything just add me on steam: idiedie2.

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #322 to #315 - ghostninja ONLINE (03/10/2014) [-]
Woudnl't playing mind Civ 5 or tf2 or L4d 2 or No more room in hell
User avatar #318 to #315 - mindsculptorjace (03/10/2014) [-]
I have Civ V but can't seem to get into it...
User avatar #319 to #318 - niceguyguy (03/10/2014) [-]
Its quite a fun game, it's really great once you have people to play with.
User avatar #317 to #315 - feelythefeel (03/10/2014) [-]
Thanks.
User avatar #321 to #317 - niceguyguy (03/10/2014) [-]
Anytime
User avatar #316 to #315 - fillelindome (03/10/2014) [-]
Planet side 2 would be pretty cool, since I am horrible at that game :/
User avatar #320 to #316 - niceguyguy (03/10/2014) [-]
It does have a learning curve but you get better over time
User avatar #263 - muffinzexe (11/13/2013) [-]
So... Whats with your fort?
User avatar #264 to #263 - niceguyguy (11/13/2013) [-]
Had no motivation to do the fort, however I got free time now so I'll hope to start it up again soon.
User avatar #265 to #264 - muffinzexe (11/13/2013) [-]
Woooooo!
It was really awesome to read those.
User avatar #266 to #265 - niceguyguy (11/13/2013) [-]
Thank you, I enjoy making them it's just it takes almost an entire day to get some noteworthy events take place, that and university work makes it hard to produce reports. However, I have a ******** of time tomorrow so expect a post ;)
User avatar #267 to #266 - muffinzexe (11/13/2013) [-]
Aw yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaah
Happy to hear!
#106 - feelythefeel (10/15/2013) [-]
So I've finally gotten the embarking process figured out, and now I'm wondering what to do, if anything. This place seems awfully... gray. Is it habitable? Should I try somewhere else?
User avatar #109 to #106 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
It seems like a good place to just get the hang of the controls and start to get the feel of the game
User avatar #110 to #109 - feelythefeel (10/15/2013) [-]
I was told that I wouldn't be able to farm here unless I dug for clay.
User avatar #111 to #110 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
The first thing to do when you embark is to get some staircases leading down into the earth, do this by pressing d (lower case) then select the "Build downward staircase option" which should be j.
User avatar #112 to #111 - feelythefeel (10/15/2013) [-]
So would you say that this is an easy place to start?
User avatar #113 to #112 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
To learn the controls sure but to survive a long time not really. But I have survived in a place like that for a long time when I first started so who knows
User avatar #114 to #113 - feelythefeel (10/15/2013) [-]
Alright, thanks. I've loaded at least five worlds and I swear I've never found a decent map.
User avatar #115 to #114 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
There is an article on world generation in the link I sent if you want to read up on creating an easier world.
#73 - feelythefeel (10/13/2013) [-]
So I have DF's Lazy Newb Pack installed, now I don't know where to go from here. What graphics pack would you recommend? Any specific settings changes? Anything else I should know?
#75 to #73 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
Fantastic! I'm always happy when more people take up dwarf fortress! You wont regret it

Anyhow, I would recommend to use the ironhand graphics pack which you will find under "Graphics", click ironhand once so that it is selected then click install graphics.

See the picture provided for extra help.

Yes there is another thing I would recommend to do which is under the "Options" tab which is top left of the application interface You can see it in the picture Look for "Modifications" You should see an option saying "Aquifers:YES", click this option once to set it to "NO" this is really important for beginners as what an Aquifer is, is basicly underground water, and I'm pretty sure you can imagine all types of fun if a dwarf mines into an underground river haha.

Best of luck on your games, please note that you need to make a world After you have made changes to the aquifer option.
User avatar #79 to #75 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
Alright, thanks. Continuing your story today?
User avatar #80 to #79 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
Yeah currently writing the next entry right now stay tuned
User avatar #82 to #80 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
So I have the map loaded, but I have no idea what I should be looking for in an embark location. What is an ideal place to embark?
User avatar #83 to #82 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
I'll provide some links for you to look at, and they should explain things better than I could haha.
Here is a really in depth guide on fortress mode it should help with anything that you may want to know.
dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/Fortress_mode
If you're more of a visual learner then here is a good series of videos that are really good.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=4g_SaPQpKbU

I would suggest to read/watch these links I sent as they helped me learn to play in about a week only basically though.
#85 to #83 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
Is this a good embark location?
User avatar #86 to #85 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
I would choose one with a "Flux stone" as this will allow you to create steel in the future which is the second best metal to have, I wont tell you the first. That's a spoiler ;) But other than that it is a good location.
User avatar #87 to #86 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
I can't find any good place with flux. Would you embark anyways?
User avatar #88 to #87 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
I would as I don't often use steel as it takes too long to produce, I like my iron ;)
#91 to #88 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
I found a better one, but it's cold. It's also a swamp. Worth it? If not, I think I'll generate a new map. I don't think I waited long enough for terrain generation anyways. What's a good amount of time to wait? I think I waited 90-100 years.
User avatar #92 to #91 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
It would be challenging, but what you can do is press f and select different options, I think it was said in the video I sent you, he does go through finding a decent embarking location. I would use that location if you don't mind a bit of a challenge
#102 to #92 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
So I've created multiple worlds with various setting, looking for a good embark location. I think I may have found it, the only problem that I can see being that the trees are sparse. Is this embark location worth it?
#105 to #102 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
Or possibly this.
#104 to #102 - feelythefeel has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #84 to #83 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
Thanks.
#89 to #84 - feelythefeel has deleted their comment [-]
#90 to #89 - feelythefeel has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #81 to #80 - feelythefeel (10/14/2013) [-]
Awesome.
#14 - niceguyguy (10/12/2013) [-]
It begins!
The first year has been quite tough on you all but you all pulled through the weather has been constant rain since the start. Here is an update:
Arrival
Our seven main dwarfs arrived to their new home, tarekmig and ferrettamer wasted no time in digging the main entrance, while kosmic started to chop down trees for beds. ajjurgens observed the whole operation while picking berries and other edibles with mrperyite. The two gained a lot of fruit in the process which kept the fort fed for a while until they both started the farms. sonnyboii and feferest where busy stocking items back onto the wagon.

**Noticeable Events*
The groups pair of dogs conceived four puppies which of course made you all insanely happy despite the harsh weather.
Thief! A kobold thief tried to steal items from the wagon but sonnyboii and feferest chased it off with help from the two adult dogs.

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza, ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace
User avatar #127 to #14 - mindsculptorjace (10/15/2013) [-]
Could you give me a few tips on how to get a foothold into the game?

So far I know to:
>cut up some trees
>mine into a nearby cliff
>make a farm

then I don't know what to do, and I abandon my attempt at playing.
User avatar #128 to #127 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
First thing to do is to make some workshops in a cave you have mined out and make some beds, read through this link, it helped me a lot

dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/DF2012:Quickstart_guide
#135 to #128 - mindsculptorjace (10/15/2013) [-]
Thanks.

guyguy confirmed for dwarven god.
User avatar #143 to #135 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
Anytime, if you need any more help at all just leave me a comment and I'll do my best. Dwarven god of tits and wine I hope.
User avatar #69 to #14 - rossthefaggot (10/13/2013) [-]
awwww I did nothing helpful
User avatar #70 to #69 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
Well you shot a titan through the neck I'd say that's pretty helpful.
User avatar #58 to #14 - mindsculptorjace (10/13/2013) [-]
What would you tell someone who waned to try DF but thought the learning curve wouldbe too hard?
User avatar #60 to #58 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
To keep trying to learn as it is so worth it, this game is just amazing with the amount of silly and random stuff that can happen I mean just look at the case of rossthefaggot trying to tame a fish.
User avatar #62 to #60 - mindsculptorjace (10/13/2013) [-]
Which tile set should I use?
User avatar #63 to #62 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
I use the ironhand set as it makes it look a lot better a big plus side is that the icons are really easy to learn. Good luck with your games! If you need any help please contact me I may not know much but I have the basics down to a tee.
User avatar #64 to #63 - mindsculptorjace (10/13/2013) [-]
Ok....made a world. hit start now it says "dwarf fortress" "adventure" or "legends" which should I choose?
User avatar #65 to #64 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
Well dwarf fortress is what I am playing at the moment, it is where you control a fort. Adventure mode is where you take control of a single hero and go on adventures. Legends mode details the history of your world, famous beasts and battles are detailed there. I would start in adventure mode so you can get used to the tileset and the mechanics of the game before you start fortress mode. Here is a couple of links to help you out.

dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/DF2012:Adventurer_mode

And

dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/DF2012:Fortress_mode
User avatar #74 to #65 - mindsculptorjace (10/14/2013) [-]
What skills should I give my dwarfs?
User avatar #76 to #74 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
You should use the lazy newb pack, this will enable you to have pre-set embark options which makes it a HELL of a lot easier to pick the game up faster.

If you have any issues with the pack or dwarf fortress in general then please contact me ASAP.
User avatar #77 to #76 - mindsculptorjace (10/14/2013) [-]
Well I was a few seconds into a world, but if it makes it that much easier, I can restart
User avatar #78 to #77 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
It makes it a lot easier
User avatar #159 to #78 - mindsculptorjace (10/16/2013) [-]
Apparently my embark spot has an adamantite sword buried hella deep.
How should I feel about this?
User avatar #160 to #159 - niceguyguy (10/16/2013) [-]
Should feel good, thats the best metal in the game. Don't know how you found out about the sword though? That's a new one to me haha.
User avatar #161 to #160 - mindsculptorjace (10/16/2013) [-]
I hit something like "view buildings" and it had my farm plot, my stockpile and then the sword. which is like 100 levels deep. I don't think I'll be reaching it soon.
User avatar #162 to #161 - niceguyguy (10/16/2013) [-]
Oh right, well good luck finding it. Maybe if you pull it out of the ground you will be the next king of dwarf fortress
User avatar #99 to #78 - mindsculptorjace (10/14/2013) [-]
How important is flux stone?
#20 to #14 - niceguyguy (10/12/2013) [-]
Hard Work!
After the first embark, you all set to work to get the basics of the fort up and running.
Main Hall
Both tarekmig and ferrettamer mined out the main hall then passed out on dwarven beer and ale. kosmic ordered that there should be a stockpile of wood next to his workshop, this was granted by ajjurgens. kosmic spent the next month building beds for the rest of the fort. Meanwhile both sonnyboii and ajjurgens created the farm and started to farm plumphelmets Mushrooms that can be eaten or brewed into beer which they then made meals from. The harvest was stored next to the farm in wooden barrels made by kosmic. feferest created his own workshop and pumped out doors and statues for the fort.

Migrants
Some migrants made it to the fort and were put to good use the list of migrants follows:
tiagodisouza - Metal worker.
ghostninja - Militla commander Was a fish dissector previously.
desacabose - Farmer
feelythefeel - Farmer
mindsculptorjace - Dwarven child

After this migrant wave kosmic made some extra beds for the new arrivals while tarekmig and ferrettamer mined out some sleeping quarters for them, feferest made them doors for their rooms.

It's cold to the touch
Well the mining duo tarekmig/ferrettamer found a lot of metals while mining out the dining hall and bedrooms, they have found hematie Iron And some rare native platinum which tiagodisouza creamed over as he can now make some really decent crafts. The rest of you helped in the construction of the metal industry which contains:
One wooden furnace.
One Metalworkers workshop.
Not much but it's a start, no one has yet to burn wood to make fuel for the workshop yet so ghostninja is pretty bored doe to the fact that he does not have any Armour to wear.

Just a side note, I might not be able to mention you all in the events that occur and that is why I'm putting the names at the bottom, if you wish for me to stop this please contact me so I can remove your name from the bottom of my posts.

Noticeable Events
tarekmig passed out again on ale.
feferest became a mason and created a masterpiece which was a table, I placed it in the dining hall More about that in the next post.
Another Kobold thief! This time it was chased off by a cat?

Posting part three straight after this, stay tuned!

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza, ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace
#25 to #20 - niceguyguy (10/12/2013) [-]
Dine In Style
Dining Hall
Well the dining hall is almost done, the mining duo mined out quite of a lot here and made the hall huge. Both kosmic and feferest made masterpiece tables Wooden and stone tables. Which the rest of you all admired their craftsmanship. feferest with the help of feelythefeel and desacabose placed his statues into the hall to act as a decoration, this resulted in all of you being immensely happy to be dining in a high-value dining room.
Think we should be playing some Barry White music right out now
As I was assigning beds to the new migrants that arrived I noticed something, desacabose and tiagodisouza are sleeping together. So I checked the relationship page and it conformed my suspicions . They're married, and the best bit is... they have four children which are currently unnamed Waiting for more FJ users to join in the fun. I did find out while in the relationship page that ghostninja is the father of mindsculptorjace, keep it up ghostninja You love machine

Get Your Hands Dirty
desacabose, feelythefeel and our dear leader ajjurgens are working really hard on the farms this autumn their yield is not much but damn if they're not trying. Seriously like every time I look for them they're rolling around in the dirt begging for the plump helmets to grow so that tarekmig can get wasted again You have a massive problem, you went through three barrels of wine. It also appears that sonnyboii just loves his ale, it's the only thing I see him drink! He also hid a barrel in his room... naughty! Let's just hope ghostninja does not catch him.
The supplies at the moment are holding out but we're expecting a dwarven caravan from the capital.
Deport? What deport?
At last! Supplies that we can trade for! At least that's what I thought until I noticed we didn't have a trade deport to trade in, feferest and kosmic quickly changed that in time for the caravan to set up shop. sonnyboii was promoted to the forts broker and handles all of the trade. Good thing too really as he has been making stone crafts in his spare time from robbing barrels of ale.
I'm afraid I can't let you do that dwarf
The merchants from the capital are being a bit of a dick to sonnyboii by declaring that his goods are not worth about 10 barrels of alcohol, a steel short sword For ghostninja and a crapton of meat. Offended, sonnyboii brings another one of his trade baskets filled with some extra rock crafts, these were of high quality and enabled the fort to get more ale and wine! Good on you sonnyboii! ghost ninja is very happy with his new steel sword and carries it with him everywhere.

Can I haz promotion?
So it may be a bit confusing as to what your job is from time to time so I'm going to post them once in awhile. Both mrperyite and sonnyboii have gained themselves promotions. Promotions are based on your dwarves skill set, if you fit the role you're given the position.

[Key: # = dead @= Alive]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ Miner
ferrettamer @ Miner
kosmic @ Woodworker/lumberjack
feferest @ Mason
sonnyboii @ Broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ Leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ Metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitilacommander
desacabose @ Farmer
feelythefeel @ Farmer
mindsculptorjace @ Dwarven Child
Copied and pasted from my notebook file.

The promotion of mrperyite required me to give him an office so that he may keep track of all of the stocks of the fort. I gave him one of the noble rooms located just right of the dining hall See the picture provided. He has been sitting in his office for a good month just reading over the books and making sure that everything is up to date. Keep up the good work mrperyite you're making it a hell of a lot easier for me to keep track of the amount of ale that sonnyboii keeps ******* stealing, typical capitalist broker!

Noticeable Events:
ghostninja is the best father ever! He watched over his son (mindsculptorjace) while he slept. Not without some dwarven rum in his hand during that time but still.

That kobold came back again but instead of cats he got chased off by our four hero puppies, I had to pause the game as I was laughing too much. I mean seriously he was holding a large iron dagger while wearing copper Armour and he ran from four puppies?

One of the caravan guards got pecked to death by a group of ravens for no apparent reason? I'm still trying to find his corpse to give his smelly Armour to ghostninja to wear for my amusement.

With ghostninja becoming the miltia captain we have our first squad called "The Junk Squad" This will be the main squad equipped with metal Armour and weapons. mindsculptorjace will be assigned to this squad as he is the son of ghostninja what better thing is there than brother and son snapping the necks of kobolds?

Planned projects
Going to make a expensive room for ajjurgens as he will become the mayor soon after the fort gains some more members.
Dining room is to be smoothed out and engraved with the history of the fort, this will be done by feferest.
kosmic will make high quality beds for nobles in the future.
When a dwarf starts to make some fuel, tiagodisouza will start to make Armour for our first squad of military dwarves.

This will be the last post on the fort in general for today I'm afraid. I'm going to try and post some more tomorrow. Will try my best to post everyday, weekdays will be quite late to post as university eats up most of my time.
But please if you have any requests or want to see any particular thing of the fort (Such as your own bedroom) or if you wish to see what your dwarf's likes/dislikes and thoughts are just comment on this post and I'll post what I can to your profiles.
#49 to #25 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
Just a side note music is included in this report to add to the overall events that occur. Click the first link and read the paragraph it is above, when you're done reading stop the music and carry on.

**** Just Got Real Son!
Well it has happened, dwarf fortress has at last become dwarf fortress, you think all I was going to do was report on the amount of beds made? **** no, it's time for Brutal carnage!
Preparing For Trouble
Is it was evident that we would get attacked soon with the amount of goods feferest was making, our fortress became a prime location for any confident raiders. So I had our mining duo of ferrettamer and tarekmig mine out an area for a barracks See picture provided on the second level of the fort, near the entrance so that if we are attacked we can get a fast response out. This was a life saving idea, however before I indulge in what I can't only say is the carnage of Satan I must provide a list of our victi- I mean dwarves.

[Key: # = dead @= Alive]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
[ADDED]
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker
rosethefaggot @ Military squad leader/ranger
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Dwarven child (Both parents are military commanders - brother of mindsculptor)
MrDeadiron @ Recruit
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Recruit

www.youtube.com/watch?v=xaRNvJLKP1E
The Calm Before The Storm
The fortress was going extremely well, our harvest collected in by feelythefeel, mrperyite, desacabose, thycupcake and ajjurgens enabled a party to be thrown! This was organised by kosmic. Everyone joined in which resulted in a loss of work, apart from feferest who was smoothing out the dining hall. Of course, all of the booze that the farmers made was quickly consumed in an orgy of happiness and dancing. This party was also used to celebrate two births! rosethefaggot gave birth to a boy, who I will train to become a royal guard. And the baby girl of desacabose who I will train to become a queen when the time is right.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=mML2fPec7xU
It's Ross Time! And Crossbow Time!
Of all of the dwarves I have ever had while playing this game rossthefaggot is by far the most confusing thing I have encountered. First let me go into some background on him, he is a ranger you know the outdoorsman who could hunt anything. Well I put his skills to good use and made him hunt for small animals incase we get hungry for meat or just need some cute pets. He captured a live ******* fish... These animal traps are designed for bunnies or other small mammals, he placed the trap in a field with no water around it and captured a fish... HOW? He spent the next month trying to tame it? It was still alive in the trap for months. However he was extremely good with a crossbow Let's hope he doesn't shoot himself with it. So I made a new squad, "The Repost Team" these were archers as you might have guessed, you can see their area on the picture provided. I added the following people to this squad: freedomreturns and a nameless dwarf. Will be named soon.

More to come!
#55 to #49 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
www.youtube.com/watch?v=_k4IRRpE5zA
He Had The Rumbles That Only Hands Could Satisfy
I knew it, a titan is at our gates. We didn't really have an armed squad or a populated squad for that matter due to the pressing need for crafts and the party. There was a small child of desacabose next to it. It loomed over her then proceeded to bite a chunk out of its head! Then it bum-rushed to the migrants that just arrived. Some of them were quickly slaughtered.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=UY81yYFzgiU
The Junk Guard lead by ghostninja quickly rushed outside from hearing the screams of dwarves being brutally slaughtered, there was blood everywhere and pieces of dwarves littered the field. Luckily rossthefaggot took his fish inside with him after fruitless attempts to make it do a backflip. ghostninja armed with a steel short sword, alongside enviousjellyfish robotvoice muffinzexe and MrDeadiron ran towards the beast attacking it, ghostninja kept stabbing it until his sword got stuck into its side which he then proceeded to try and pull the thing out. robotvoice went into a trance and kept kicking and punching the huge titan along side muffinzexe, they managed to break its leg by kicking its kneecap the thing shattered into pieces. MrDeadiron was biting chunks of flesh out of the monsters arms, while enviousjellyfish was trying to tear its scales off with wrestling.

Part three is coming!
#56 to #55 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
www.youtube.com/watch?v=XzpYXtEnBgs
!!Archers At The Ready!!!
The Repost Team that consisted of rossthefaggot and freedomreturns rushed out of the barracks as The Junk Guard where trying to kick this huge satanic monster to death. They quickly rushed to get within range of this beast and proceeded to keep firing bolt after bolt at it, the monster was quickly being shot down. It then did something which surprised me, it morphed into a child See picture provided. This small child was running from a horde of seriously pissed off dwarves, ghostninja kept on trying to swing at it but missed as this ****** was Fast!!! But it didn't run fast enough to escape from rossthefaggot and freedomreturns crossbow bolts and received a bolt straight through it's neck, before I could see if it had lived or died it ran off the edge of the map which resulted in all of the military dwarves returning to their bedrooms/jobs.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=67bZGL3hMnI
!!Victory!

Despite our poorly equipped soldiers we made it through this horrific nightmare of tortoise children. As I checked on the inside of the fort to make sure there was no other threats I noticed that desacaboses child was lying dead on the floor of the bedroom areas. She had bled to death which to me is pretty ******* hardcore she made it back inside despite having half her brain missing.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3a-5AITqMo
End Result
We may have won and it was a thing to be proud of considering that we were practically defenseless. Yet many had died during this battle, the corpses of the young and old laid bare for the crows across the field. But I think the saddest thing I have seen is desacabose burying her child in the catacombs I made. She is seriously depressed and the rest of the fort is "Content" which is bad news, I can only hope to Amok that one of you doesn't go insane and start a tantrum spiral.

Noticable Events
sonnyboii has gone into a secretive mood and has begun constructing something at the craft-dwarfs workshop.
I have renamed the field outside of the fort to "Fishland"
We have a total of 58 dwarfs which means I need a lot more names so if you have anyone who would like to join in, please send me a message!

Note
If you have any requests such as seeing your dwarfs likes/dislikes and thoughts please send me a message or comment so I can post them.

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite,
tiagodisouza, ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome, rosethefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice, freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish
#93 to #56 - niceguyguy (10/14/2013) [-]
Current Dwarfs
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker
rosethefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Dwarven child (Both parents are military commanders - brother of mindsculptor)
MrDeadiron @ Recruit
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Recruit
[ADDED]
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=xaRNvJLKP1E
It Was Crafted By Sonnyboii
So we find out what sonnyboii our local ale stealing broker was up to, he made a hematite bracelet It's basically a bracelet made from iron ore. It is named Nogleshvukcas and has been logged in the history of the world. I kept this in cabinet for the future King/Queen. [spoiler] If we get one.

Improvements Are Made
We have been very busy lately, thycupcake, desacabose, feelythefeel, ajjurgens and mrperyite have made an above ground farm which has resulted in a new drink for us all! Dwarven wine! Made from strawberries, they also worked on "Sewer brew" Which is made from rat weeds. I'm not sure how it tastes but I should ask tarekmig as he is normally passed out on god knows what. Any-who the metal industry is a success! We have iron being produced by tiagodisouza, this is then sent to the junk guard which consists of enviousjellyfish, muffinzexe, MrDeadiron and feelythefeel lead by ghostninja. You're all armed with some basic weapons but no Armour just yet. You do however make good use of your weapons with ghostninja providing classes in the use of these weapons in the barracks.

A Spanner In The Works
Damn migrants and their migrantness. How dare they come to our outpost seeking shelter because of the tales that spread throughout the land of the fortress that fended off a huge tortoise from hell with a squad of seriously pissed off unarmed dwarfs and two crossbows? Yes that's right we have more victims to play with, however I was too busy fixing the damage after the attack, by this I mean making you all happy as a large number was seriously depressed which would have ended up in you all killing each-other. So I have kosmic shooting out beds from his workshop while tarekmig and ferrettame mine out a lot of rooms for some useless mouths to feed.

Changes To Squads
I noticed that rossthefaggot didn't really like the responsibility of being a captain in the military and it was seriously affecting his mental health so I just made him a regular marksdwarf he seems to really like it now. The new leader of the "Repost Team" is hunterhunting More about him later. The Junk Guard are doing extremely well with their training at the moment they have gained some skills in their basic training and are now able to survive for more than just a couple of minutes. phantomeins also grew up and I assigned him to the Junk Guard, he will make a good recruit with his experience in wrestling.

Wood? No thanks.
Elves! Those pointy eared hippies decide to come to our gates wishing to trade! God I hate them. I resist the urge of letting the Junk Guard slaughter them as we have too many overpopulation problems at the moment, I trade them some simple arts and crafts that feferest made and got a Giant War Tiger Yep that's right, the next time something attacks us a huge ******* tiger is going to be let loose. I decide to call him "Fluffy" I assign him to hunterhunting.

Our Own Deity
hunterhunting has become the god of bacon trinkets, may his porkness protect us all in these dark times! Thought it would be fun to add in a god under a FJ users name he is captain of the "Repost Team" and is currently training the giant tiger for war.

Noticeable Events
I saw desacabose carrying around a dead wild boar while carrying her child, I think that kid is going to need therapy.
Both the Junk Squad and the Repost Team have done well in their training to become decent enough soldiers.
So many migrants...

I apologize to you all for what may seem to be a short and quite boring post on the happenings in game I have not had much time to play it today for any real events to happen. Univeristy work has been quite stressful these days so I can't be 100% commited to this as I would like to be. I also apologize to those I don't mention that much during posts, I try to mention everyone and what you have been doing but it is harder as time goes on as the fort keeps growing in size. You also may be wondering why hunterhunting has been made into a god/given a tiger. Well he has helped me IRL through some seriously dark times and to make a long story short he helped save my life , wanted to repay him in a silly way.

Planned projects
I plan to post the list of pets that you all have and assign some of you some war pets! That's right folks grizzly bears giant tigers, and most ferocious of all.... War kittens! Beware!
Going to post some stuff of you individually, once the fort settles down a bit. This means I'll post some updates on your dwarfs doings on your profile as per request so if you want to know what your dwarf has been doing please send me a message, same goes for if you want to know your dwarfs likes/dislikes. Going to try my best to post it when I have the time.

Thank you all for playing this game it's been really fun and I'm glad I was able to provide some laughs along the way, especially when ross tried to tame a fish. When this fort falls I'll make another one in a new area, so if you want to join in the fun a second time around send me a message as I'm making the list of people now.
#116 to #93 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rosethefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Dwarven child (Both parents are military commanders - brother of mindsculptor)
MrDeadiron @ Recruit
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Recruit
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcn6FV1HDLQ I was playing with this music in the background, oh god it fit so perfectly.
Mistakes Were Infact Made
As hunterhunting said in his posts I did make a forge out of charcoal then released how stupid that was as the thing would just burst into flames. Another mistake was not preparing for migrants, they just keep coming worst of all they keep being completely useless. Seriously the amount of peasants and other useless dwarves I got is unreal, I might just start a war so I can get most of them killed then again with the way things have been going with our exports goblins will soon ambush us.

In Soviet Russia, Ore Smelts You
tiagodisouza has been smelting a lot of ore and has made a ton of iron bars. The whole stockpile is just full of bars at the moment, so I'm making some iron Armour for the "Junk Guard" hopefully you will all be fully equipped for the oncoming slaughter I have planned for our green friends. Also planning to have a wall and a moat with archery towers so the Repost Team can rain down a hail of crossbow bolts I'm also currently making some traps specifically cage traps, so I can create an arena where some of you will be picked to battle it out with any captured foes.

Mayor Gets An Upgrade
I totally forgot about the ajjurgens requirements as mayor, so I decided to smooth his room out and place some statues in there to make it even better, he seems to really like his new grand bedroom. He has banned an export on toys though... Guess he doesn't want other races to have fun with toys crafted by tarekmig/feferest spreaking of crafts!

Fire Bones At them, The Irony Will Be Hilarious
So I was making Armour and weapons using tisgodisouza and I thought it would be an idea to start making some ammunition for The Repost Team, since they didn't have a lot between them all. In this game you can make bone crossbow bolts which I find super funny, I mean come on you're literally firing death at people! They're also extremely good to use in training considering the mass amount of corpses that our cats have been collecting See picture, it's the pile of purple on the right side Seriously these cats have been killing so many rats. I made mrperyite, sonnyboii, desacabose, thycupcake and filleindome start to make crossbow bolts to aid in the war effort against any goblins that will attack soon.

Please Sir, May I Have Some More?
No Oliver you can't, no seriously you can't we have no food! That's right the food has started to run out due to the amount of migrants They took our JERRBS the fort is doing a lot better after I started to use the extra hands we have to collect wild food or though I didn't notice how many people were doing nothing until I looked outside. See Picture We had A lot of Hungry, hungry dwarves Thank god they're not hippos. We collected in so much fruit and wild meat that was left by hunters that our food stocks exploded which resulted in mrperyite freaking out and I quote "Going ******* crazy" - muffinzexe who saw mrperyite flying into a rage over how much work he now had to do counting the harvest.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jcBPPD1fuZY
Wow, This Is A Lot Of Incest
No there is no incest before the lannisters start getting excited, but I was looking through the relationships of mindsculptorjace who is still a child and it turns out that almost all of you are related in one way or another for instance mindsculptorjace's family consists of the following Named FJ users ghostninja - Father rossthefaggot Fishman - Mother, phantomeins - Older brother, Gonnafly - Older brother, freedomreturns - Aunt. So a lot of you are brothers and sisters or aunts and uncles and so forth which I thought was quite interesting as if one of you dies then your dwarfs will react in a much more serious way.

Noticeable Events
Not much to report so far today has been just regaining our fort from the hordes of migrants however there were some funny things.
hunterhunting has a Liama following him around everywhere it looks like it's constantly chasing him.
I found out today that kosmic really loves fish, like seriously he was carrying around huge chunks of fish meat and eating them RAW like a boss!
We have so many dogs now, a lot of you seem disintrested in them though but I'm going to assign some dogs to you all if I have enough animal trainers.

Future Projects
1) Still working on getting enough blocks to make a wall quickly as well as getting our mining duo Who by the way have become legendary miners. tarekmig and ferretamer to dig out some more stone and to dig out a moat which I will leave empty as it makes it easier to funnel them into range of the archery towers.
2) Expecting a human caravan soon which will be great news for us as we can trade our arts and crafts for some much needed seeds and fine weapons and alcohol!
3) Once both the Junk Guard and Repost Team have had enough training and are equipped enough to last in a fight for some time. I'm going to keep digging deeper to hopefully find a cave to get some rare jewels or some rare metals like gold or silver to use for some fancy Armour to those who are lucky.
4) Need to make a screw pump for the stagnant water outside of the fort to make it into fresh clean water for you all to use in the hospital which I'm in the process of building.

A Big Thank You, To You All
This is quite possibly been the most fun I have had on dwarf fortress so far so I'd like to thank you all for playing. I'm really glad that some of you have chosen to take up dwarf fortress for yourselves, if you need any help with dwarf fortress in any aspect please contact me and I'll try my best to explain anything or recommend some sources to use that helped me when I was trying to learn.
#155 to #116 - niceguyguy (10/16/2013) [-]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rossthefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Sword-dwarf
MrDeadiron @ Axedwarf
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Recruit
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

Humans Have Arrived
The trade caravan has finally came and has brought with it some useful items, we traded some ore and crafts for some seeds and food. Yet the titan came back and it has grown from being a child into a peasant it was chased off by the junk guard. We are still a bit light on food but we have got enough to last. We're going to go full Stalinist on our food production, so almost all of you will be slaves if you're a farmer. But be happy! You're doing it for mother Russi- Our fortress. This doesn't mean that you will be neglecting your military duties.

It's farming time.
The farms above ground have improved greatly, we're producing a lot more strawberry wine and rat sewer broth Whatever the hell that is Thanks to feelythefeel, mrperyite, desacabose, and thycupcake we have more booze than sense, a lot of ale which sonnyboii is going to love to steal when he has the chance. We're going to be farming pickle berries soon which means more alcohol! The farms above ground are unprotected which was quickly solved by building a nice wall around it and a moat to add to the defense. See picture provided

That's It! We're Eating The Children
More migrants! These people don't know when to piss off do they? tarekmig and ferrettamer were quickly sent to mine out more rooms with kosmic sighing at the thought of making more beds. feferest will be spending the next month making doors and trap components for what I have planned. The Military is too over crowded and tisgodisouza can't keep up with the amount of weapons that are needed as well as Armour. However this migrant wave does enable me to use these poor fools to keep gathering plants in the rain while the rest of you do important work, if they're working they don't need to eat!

Rich! I Tell You
So I noticed we have a lot of gems just lying around, so I decided it would be an idea to have them cut. Made a workshop for any dwarfs with the gem cutting skill enabled and boy was it a good investment we have loads of rare cut gems just lying around at the moment, I'm expecting a goblin raid soon our fort is getting richer by the day and yet we have not been attacked just yet which has me extremely worried.

Hello Fellow Dwarves
So for some reason the dwarves came a bit early this year, either that or I was playing for a long time without noticing. Any-who, with the cut gems and some extra ore we have lying around on-top of the crafts made by sonnyboii, kosmic, and feferest we gained a lot of stuff. Mainly about 20 barrels of more wine,ale etc. We almost missed an opportunity to trade with the caravan as our broker, sonnyboii wouldn't stop partying and drinking and passed out, I couldn't use anyone else as he was the only dwarf with the skill to judge how much something is worth which stops us from being ripped off. But in the end we have more food and drink for everyone including the migrants that arrived.

The Repost Team
The team have had a lot of "Live practice" if you can call it that, normal dwarf-folk call it hunting though, hunterhunting brought in a boar which resulted in mrperyite, slicing it into bits so that we can use every part of it. The repost team have been training using some new wooden crossbow bolts. This will make them great sentries when I post them in the archery towers. rossthefaggot seems to like an iron crossbow now which he can use to bash in some skulls when the time comes.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK6TXMsvgQg
Hide Yo Kids
Snatcher! I knew it those damn goblins are trying to take our children, I would seriously let them if it didn't upset the parents. But on the other hand, when these goblins take the children they do some kind of brainwashing so anyone that's kidnapped will more than likely be firing arrows at us in some years down the line. I got the Junk Guard to chase him off, not before the goblin just ******* shanked a mason in the hand, how is he suppose to work now? Well guess we're eating mason tonight. Meat's back on the menu boys! but guess what, rossthefaggot shot him in the kneecaps and made him pass out not long before a seriously pissed off phantomeins sliced his head off with an iron short sword. Talk about overkill!

We asked what phantomeins said to the goblin before he killed him his response was this: "www.youtube.com/watch?v=3WSe9ugpXIw"

Noticeable Events
1) sonnyboii created a masterpiece pot which goes for about 2500* which means this pot is pretty damn good so I might sell it when the elves get here so we can get some really kick-arse pets!
2) thycupcake gave birth to a boy! Which means another mouth to feed, no matter we will have him in a uniform soon enough.
3) sonnyboii is finding another excuse to drink ale, he organised a party! Most of you joined in which resulted in you all having happy thoughts.
4) phantomeins has become a herbalist and a ******* badass

I at last get to start our kill counter! Remember kids, Blood For The Blood God You can see the pool of blood in the picture.
**Kill Count*
phantomeins - One Goblin snatcher. (Decapitated)
#170 to #155 - niceguyguy (10/17/2013) [-]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rossthefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Sword-dwarf
MrDeadiron @ Axedwarf
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Speardwarf
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJuz7_ngu_w
An Odd Kind Of Attack
Straight after phantomeins murder of a child snatcher two more came with a kobold thief. phantomeins attacked a kobold thief but lost his foot in the fight, the kobold thief attempted to escape not before an enraged phantomeins was crawling after it. It was intercepted by feelythefeel who bashed its guts in with a war hammer, muffinzexe finished it off with a quick chop to the neck with an iron battleaxe. By this point things are starting to get serious non-combat dwarfs are cuaght in the cross-fire, plant gathers are getting sliced and having their skulls cracked in by the snatchers as they try to make their escape. The repost team are sent in to clean the mess, while the Junk Guard are positioned to protect their wounded who are at this point, ghostninja and phantomeins who by this time is loosing a lot of blood. hunterhunting along side freedomreturns and rossthefaggot rush outside firing a hail of crossbow bolts towards the fleeing goblins. One goblin had his hand ripped to shreads by a bolt fired by freedomreturns, at this point the goblins turn around and start to bum rush towards the repost team. hunterhunting is caught in a close-encounter with a mad goblin who is wildly swinging around a dagger, luckily hunterhunting had a heavy crossbow (bronze) which he bashed in the goblins skull, at this point both rossthefaggot and freedomreturns are fighting with the other remaining goblin snatcher. They both get some lucky hits in seriously smashing the goblins ribcage with their crossbows before hunterhunting rips apart the goblins skull with his hands. MrDeadiron, robot voice and thycupcake guarded the bridge to protect the fleeing dwarves I sent out to collect food.

The end result was about seven wounded, two serious cases. At least we can feast upon the flesh of the goblins to gain their strength. Just kidding only elves do that.

Eh, What's Up Doc?
With about seven bleeding dwarves I needed to create a hospital quickly I get tarekmig and ferrettamer to mine out an area for one next to the barracks so I can get the soldiers used to seeing blood and gore as well as seeing their comrades in pain. I want to make them all emotionless killing machines, on another note I sent everyone who was injured into the newly made hospital and appointed a nameless dwarf to be the chief medical officer. Now I just needed to find some worthy dwarves to be doctors.

Beware! I live.
You love him, you love to hate him! That's right folks he's back! That god damn titan wont quit he just ran up to a nameless dwarf and bit into his kneecaps before running off.... I seriously wish I was making this up. I sent the Repost team to gun that annoying turtle...child? thing! down but they couldn't find him. Not until he cropped up again and killed two nameless dwarves, by this point he's now a medium level threat And a good tool for population control. I sent the Junk Guard to chase after him which resulted in another dwarf being killed. But I have prepared a little something for him next time..

Speaking Of Monsters
Oh god their hideous and downright awful, yeah that's right their back yet again. Damn elves and their smug faces. Traded some crafts made by feferest and some cut gems that we collected over the year for some ale and wine they didn't have any animals this time which made me question why they even came at all. Their response was "I only shop at organic stores as to not beef up the capitalist pigs" I didn't understand a word of their gibberish and was quite offended at the lack of ale. So I sent them on their way, the dwarven way! As they were leaving I sent murrinzexe and MrDeadiron to chop down some trees on their way out. In this game the elves get wood over well... wood so if you chop down too much or try to trade wooden items with them, they get pissed and start a war so a lot of DF players have a vendetta against them.

fillelindome Wants This
Well now that we have some extra wood let's craft some wooden bolts and shields for the military to use! Or not... fillelindome took over the dwarven craft workshop declaring that he needed a number of different items. He waited around before crafting a bone pickaxe named robernish. I'm sure that tarekmig and ferrettamer are just dying to use this bone pickaxe. Pun intended

Archers At The Ready
Both of the archery towers are now complete and will now be manned by the Repost team, this will enable us to scout out any attacks long before they can do any real damage it also allows us to rain down bolts to any snatchers or skilled kobold dagger uses. Going to try and make walkways across the walls to enable archers to move from tower to tower to maximize the effectiveness of our archery team.

Noticeable Events
1) None so far, many of you have just been working non-stop.

#192 to #170 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rossthefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Sword-dwarf
MrDeadiron @ Axedwarf
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Speardwarf
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

More To Add To The Flames
Again... it happened again... I mean really you would think goblin attacks and kobold thiefs as well as a giant tortoise-man-child-thing. Would deter people coming to settle here, nope. More migrants! Just great.... well it is great! They have useful jobs like mason and siege operator but this does not mean that they wont cause us problems, you know the drill, tarekmig and ferrettamer mined out the area needed while kosmic is pumping out beds during which feferest is making doors for their rooms. Our fortress contains 157 dwarves now, mostly comprised of useless children who sit around all day and eat up all of the food and drink all of the drink. This is causing a major strain on the food industry, thycupcake, feelythefeel desacabose, mrperyite and ajjurgens are working around the clock getting their hands dirty farming extra crops to accommodate for these parasites. With extra people around I didn't even notice that the drink storage was practically empty which made a lot of you almost dying of thirst I quickly got feferest and sonnyboii to make some extra stills so I could pump out a whole lot of drink for everyone. Only a baby died of thirst but at least it's one less mouth to feed.

Full Metal tiagodisouza
Due to the high amount of dwarves I thought it would be a good idea to create a fortress guard to punish criminals, with a hammer of course, to control the population. This newly created squad is a ranged unit due to the fact that when they issue beatings they use whatever weapon they have on them so I assigned them to have crossbows to use for the beatings, they wont fire on dwarves but they can use their wooden crossbows which will be a lot safer than a iron sword. I had mrperyite check the stocks again and found that we were lacking in metal bolts, so tiagodisouza spent the next months smelting ore and creating streams of bolts to use in our new towers created by sonnyboii and feferest. He also made a number of different iron Armour and weapons for a new melee squad I created entirely out of unnamed dwarves to use as a metal shield to protect the Junk Guard.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4sNBfbbBDg
This Is Our Finest Hour
Another titan, but not one I have ever seen before. It appears to be the Greek mythical creature "Minotaur" scary stuff. At this point I'm getting kind of sick at how we keep getting attacked, so I mobilize the army, only this time we're not loosing a single man. I first send all of the dwarves outside of the fort to quickly run inside with the Junk Guard covering the main entrance while the newly created squad is holding the front of the fortress, the repost team are sent into the archery towers, before everyone can get inside the Minotaur is at the gates, the first squad goes in and begins to battle with the massive creature. As soon as the monster was sighted the repost team filled it with iron bolts, this slowed it down but not for long.

One spear dwarf was badly beaten but not long before muffinzexe came into the picture. He was the first one to respond out of the Junk Guard, the rest of you were training and took some time arriving to the gate, muffinzexe hacked the minotaur in the arm with his iron battle axe tearing the beasts muscle, an artery was opened by the attack, this made the Minotaur enraged. muffinzexe responded with smashing his axe into the side of the beasts foot which caused the ankles bone to shatter. After this, muffinzexe hacks into the other foot resulting in the beast having two broken and seriously cut hooves and a cut open arm. Before an enraged muffinzexe could do any more damage a spear-dwarf stabbed it through the skull.

Time To Get Serious
I noticed our defense is a bit lacking and it is relying a lot of dwarves which anyone should know you shouldn't trust to do a good job. So I'm extending our defenses to that you have to cross three bridges to get inside or you'll land in a pit where you can't escape and eventually starve to death. tarekmig and ferrettamer are mining out the areas and feferest is making some blocks to use in the construction of the bridges. Might place some metal spikes down their if I have some spare iron for tisgodisouza to use.

Ah Humans
Well the humans arrived and bypassed our inaccessible site and sure enough there was one single tree in the way of our new entrance. Bet those elves put it there. So the humans didn't have a lot to trade, they had some food and a lot of leather which is useful as I can use it to make Armour for the respost team, so I traded kosmic, sonnyboii and feferests goods to get some leather and food.

Noticeable Events
1) For some reason a female nameless dwarf slept in the blood of the slain Minotaur with her infant child... I don't really have a response to this.
2) A child snatcher got a parasite, good luck with that goblin they do nothing but eat and drink then sleep.
User avatar #222 to #192 - niceguyguy (10/19/2013) [-]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rossthefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Sword-dwarf
MrDeadiron @ Axedwarf
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Speardwarf
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

An Apology
I notice a lot of you are asking about if you have a purpose in the fort and or if you're important at all, my response is this: Yes, you're all important, every dwarf in this fort Apart from those parasitic kids is important. I'm trying to post each day to keep you all updated and I realize that some dwarfs are mentioned more than others. This is due to the fact that their jobs are related to what I'm doing at that point in time such as building a new area. At the moment the fort consists of 154 dwarfs and those who have tried the game out can understand this is quite hectic to manage. So I am sorry that I can't mention you all in a post as it's quite hard to do at this stage Anyways, I don't think I will be able to post a full report today Due to Uni work I will attempt to make up for this tomorrow.

All the best.
#235 to #222 - niceguyguy (10/21/2013) [-]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rossthefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Sword-dwarf
MrDeadiron @ Axedwarf
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Speardwarf
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

Wave Goodbye
Well the humans are off on their journey to whichever land they came from, sent sonnyboii to make more rock crafts for the dwarves when they arrive in autumn. Got tarekimig and ferrettamer to mine further into the earth to see if we can find a cavern to explore and to use for underground farming of fungi trees so it reduces the time we spend outside. kosmic has been busy making splints and crutches for the newly And make shift Hospital where ghostninja and phantomeins is still resting from their wounds from the rather odd attack of the child snatchers.

Clear
Phantomeins is back and is ready to kick... punch some ass? Both ghostninja and phantomeins were assessed by our medical team Who kept suggesting we smother them with pillows Now both are back on their feet with the help of crutches crafted by kosmic. I noticed that some dwarfs were not getting proper treatment due to the lack of soap. So I sent some off duty dwarves to make the workshops needed, enviousjellyfish and MrDeadiron both built an ashery and a soapmakers workshop. This will provide many of you with happy thoughts from using said soap, it also provides the wounded with a way to rid themselves of infections.

Well You Got To Have An Opinion
I constructed a danger room which is basically a room with wooden spikes inside of it that I place military dwarves into to train them in whatever they use to block the said spikes. Some consider this an exploit however this being dwarf fortress I'm pretty sure that it wont change how brutally hard this game is. The first squad that's up is the Junk Guard, that means that feelythefeel, ghostninja, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, phantomeins, freedomreturns and enviousjellyfish are sent into the danger room to train their skills against those really painful wooden spikes. Well at least phantomeins wont hurt his leg, too soon? The results where that all dwarfs gained a lot of skill in Armour and shield.

Oh For The Love Of Satan
More useless mouths to feed.... seriously who keeps sending these people to this death trap? Well I have feferest, ferretamer, tarekmig and kosmic do their thing and accommodate for these people. We have a total of 171 dwarves now, the total cap is at 200 and I can increase it if we require more people yet I don't think that will happen quite soon. Due to the increase in people I can only fear an attack is going to follow as it seems to be the pattern, so I am making feferest, mrperyite and desacabose make some traps around the stairwell that goes throughout the fort in hopes that this will kill anything that gets past our front line defenses and patrols. Also set up a little scouting operation.. I tied a donkey up to the entance of our fort as they can detect raiders who try to sneak into the fort. Fear the all seeing Ass! Good thing I set the donkey up as after I tied it to the entrance it detected a kobold thief and one of our marksdwarves shot it in the lower body tearing its pancreas apart with a single shot, straight after this shot our marksdwarf fired another shot and stuck the kobold thief in the kidney knocking it into the moat. After this our squad of meat shield dwarves went down into the moat and hacked it into pieces. The moat is filled with body parts and blood of a kobold thief.. that should make goblins think twice. Or not...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZkPTjIZG97A
Dwarves Have Arrived
Ah, at last time to send sonnyboii to trade with the dwarves and hope to god that they don't try to con us into selling useful stuff, however as soon as they arrive a goblin ambush as been deployed. These goblins are lightly armoured with only copper breastplates Which are really bad and iron helmets, their weapons are quite good so this should be interesting. As soon as all of the squads clash another ambush is deployed just north of the entrance, I sent the archers to their towers to counter attack these new goblins. Here are the highlights of our named military dwarves:

Muffinaxe: Blocks a flying arrow then slices a goblins arm off. After he smashes a goblin in the ankle which causes the bone to come out. Then proceeds to cut the mentioned foot off. Knocks a goblin to the ground from a charge then stamps his foot through its skull.
enviousjellyfish: Stabs a goblin in the hand with his spear then tries to stab a goblin in the head three times but each time the attack is deflected by a iron helmet. Stabbed a goblin in the lung and thrusted upwards twisting the spear in the goblin before the goblin was decapitated by an unnamed dwarf from the meat shield squad.
thycupcake: Was shot in the arm and collapsed from the pain but got back up and beat a goblin to death with his iron war hammer.
robotvoice: Smashes a goblins arm causing his bone to burst out, gets hit in the leg and his hip bone receives damage. Gets angry then bashes in the goblins skull with his war hammer.
phantomeins: Slashes a goblin in the leg with his sword and cuts it clean off, tries to slash a goblin in the head by the attack is deflected by a helmet. Proceeds to stab a goblin through his eyelid jamming his sword through its skull and helmet.
MrDeadiron: Sliced a goblins leg off then proceeded to wildly swing at a goblin bowman.

The rest of you were away from the battle, some of you were sleeping others got their when it was too late. As for the marksmen you fired into the battle but non of the named dwarves hit anything due to arriving late and that there were not many goblins left.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-MINfVtYik
End Result
We lost a single unamed dwarf from the meat shield squad, as you can see from the picture we have a entire field of goblin corpses and ligaments. I think I even saw some goblin teeth knocked out.

Noticeable Events
1) A stray goat stared at phantomeins while he was resting at the hospital, checked the animals screen and it was not owned by anyone, creepy.
2) A nanny goat kicked a baby-lama in the face.
3) Our dwarves had nanny goat for lunch today!

Sorry about the wait on this one, but I sure hope it was worth it considering the true nature of dwarf fortress showing itself.
#246 to #235 - niceguyguy (10/22/2013) [-]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker/full metal.
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter/arrowman
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rossthefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Sword-dwarf
MrDeadiron @ Axedwarf
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf/goblin slayer.
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Speardwarf
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

Aftermath
Well after that bloody battle we received a lot of new weapons and Armour which is going to do us a lot of good. We obtained a lot of copper breastplates, which are useless really so we can trade these with the dwarf caravans that arrived during the attack They sure know when to crash a party. We also received a lot of iron helmets that can be given to the meat shield squad, we also received a lot of decent weapons for you all to use. As the battle was waging on some of you like thycupcake had an unlucky time and gained some war wounds. robot voice has his leg and hipbone broken, thycupcake seems to be in his room with a broken arm with an arrow stuck inside it.

Trading Is Fun
I got sonnyboii to trade all of the copper weapons and Armour that we have to get a lot of seeds to help us survive the winter. We also got some more food to help us during the winter. Snatchers arrived just after the dwarves start to embark on their journey. They kidnapped two babies Thank god The parents are not happy, let's hope that they will hold a grudge when the goblins come back again so that we can use that anger to kill them more quickly. Set some cage traps around the fort to ensure that we have a steady supply of goblins so that I can start some work on the arena.

Winter Is Coming
Woh chill out edd stark... don't loose your head! Yeah that's right good old winter is here which means that only plump helmets can be farmed by thycupcake Who still has an arrow in him. ajjurgens, mrperyite and feelythefeel in this month which is kinda bad considering that I bought a lot of pig tail seeds. Oh well have to wait until spring until those elves Hippes come again and offer nothing but leather. A goblin snatcher was detected again by the almighty ass, unlucky for him he was standing next to a ranger who shot him full of iron bolts, the first bolt ripped through his leg causing him to crawl before the ranger shot his arms causing the bolt to push out the bone causing the goblin to give into the pain. The muffinaxe came out of no where and slashed his limbs off before punching the goblins legs? This caused the goblin to bleed out and die. Due to muffinaxes brutal execution of goblins I'm promoting him to goblin slayer.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDQ7hXMLxGc
Comrades! Band Together For Stalin
I sent tiagodisouza the full metal down to the blacksmith forge to spend the winter producing arms for the glorious Red Dwarf army! He made a total of:
500 Iron bolts.
3 Iron Battle Axes.
2 pairs of iron gauntlets.
2 pairs of iron high boots.

That may not sound a lot but you only get 25 bolts from a single iron bar, so Comrade tiagodisouza made a hell of a lot of ammo for the repost team. However during this time I send tarekmig and ferrettamer down into the mines to explore for a cavern if we find one this will be great for our farmers. Great news! Gonnafly has grown to become a peasant after all these years spent as a child, I made him the mitila captain of the meat Shield squad so I can keep a close eye on him while they explore any caverns. If we find some.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ag1o3koTLWM
Ross Is At It Again
So I notice that we have low stocks on small animals so I send out ross to try and capture us some more... he got a fish again, I order it to be killed so we can eat but for the love of god I don't know how he still manages to catch a fish in the middle of a dry field. Anywho, I send the repost team to try out the archery range, they use simple wooden bolts but their skills are increasing, let's just hope that they will be able to hit moving targets when the next attack comes. While bolts are being fired ajjugens conducted a meeting with the diplomat from the homeland it seems they want a lot of toys and simple rock crafts which is fantastic as sonnyboii and feferest have been making trade-able items as well as improving the dining room with extra tables and chairs. As Gonnafly had no military skills I sent him into the danger room and he became a legendary knife user in just seconds.

Slay The Green Plague
More goblins, but this time it's a siege! Good thing I trained up Gonnafly! I quickly send the repost team to their archery towers and the Junk Guard and the Meat shield down to defend the trade deport. I notice that the goblins have by-passed the fort to attack a single lone hammer dwarf left over from the caravan that just left. The green horde kept stabbing him and pushing him back until he left a line of blood and turned into a pile of limbs and broken teeth. The gate remains closed and the goblins seem to be doing nothing but standing around, so I send the Junk Guard to the danger room to make sure that they're ready to take on this filth that has entered our fort. So everyone in the Junk Guard has become a lord of their weapon this should be good enough for us to take on these goblins.

The Attack
I send out the Meat Shield squad out in front of the archery towers, the goblins came rushing to the gates and were met with a hail of bolts, many of them piercing the arms and hands of the goblin filth, most of the squad were wiped out quickly due to the large numbers of goblins This is why I didn't send in the Junk Squad The repost team kept on shooting after the battle at the goblins resulting in a lot of wounded invaders who attempted to flee from the map but were met with more crossbow bolts. Gonnafly was running around the map for a good while before having his head slashed off by a goblin. He went down fighting, he stabbed two goblins in the chest piecing their lungs and he also knocked some teeth out with his boots. After the barrage of bolts by the repost team I sent out the Junk guard to finish the rest, Muffinaxe got a couple of kills, MrDeadiron kicked a goblin to death, ghostninja let his war dogs do his work and watched a goblin get eaten alive.

Noticeable Events
1) Saw two baby dwarfs at the bottom of a lake... I have no idea how they even got there.
#268 to #246 - niceguyguy (11/14/2013) [-]
[DWARVES]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker/full metal.
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter/arrowman
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rossthefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Sword-dwarf
MrDeadiron @ Axedwarf
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf/goblin slayer.
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Speardwarf
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qkuu0Lwb5EM
Oh Dwarf Fortress, How I Missed You
So I decided to post again today as I have quite a lot of spare time on my hands, I'm not five seconds into the game and dwarf fortress decides to show its true colours again. Some nameless farmer-dwarf in the meeting hall went berserk causing him to become hostile to the entire fort. Little did he know that there are 13 war dogs in the meeting directly next to him as well as a Giant ******* tiger! The dogs swarm the farmer and start to bite at his limbs causing the fat to become bruised and some minor bleeding, then the tiger decides to take things up a notch BAM He first slashes the farmers hand causing it to break and the fingers to detach, the muscle is completely destroyed at this point next he proceeds to bite into the farmers upper-arm and shake violently ripping the arm from the shoulders socket. This action alone drenches the statue next to this carnage in blood. Finally the tiger ends the maddness by mauling the farmer in the head by smashing its paw through his skull. The end result is 1 fourth of the meeting hall is covered in blood and there are teeth and limbs scattered around.

Communists Will Be Eradicated
A vile force of darkness has arrived! More green scourge to riddle with crossbow bolts. They seem to have brought out the big guns on this siege, an army of trolls has arrived alongside the green scum, they're all mounted on different animals as well, I fear that this may be the end of the fort. I send the repost team up to the towers and close the bridge, the meat shield and the Junk Guard are sent behind the bridge to guard it. A miner and a child are caught outside, one of the trolls grabs the child and strangles it to death before being riddled with bolts by the repost team. The goblins that are on mounts are all bowmen and rush to the entrance of the fort to find the miner trapped outside, they waste no time in gunning him down in a shower of arrows. What happens next looks just like D-Day with the trolls attempting to get into the fort only to be shot down by the repost team in the archery towers, one crossbow bolt strikes a troll in the leg causing it to fall into the moat resulting in its skull to be caved in by the fall.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsx2vdn7gpY
The End Game
I checked the reports of the battle to find that tarekmig was the miner that was trapped outside, muffinzexe was chopping trees down during the invasion and was also caught outside. He rushed towards the mounted bowmen however he was unable to reach them as he was riddled with arrows. Muffinzexe fell to the ground in pain before being shot through the chest and killed. This of course seriously pissed me off as I have now lost two of my named dwarves. These green scum will pay. I send out the Junk Guard and the meat shield to battle the filth the result was they retreated however fillelindome was shot and killed during the chasing.

This will be a short post today as I have to do some work for an exam.

RIP
muffinzexe (axe lord)
tarekmig (drunk)
fillelindome (Fisherman)
User avatar #273 to #268 - niceguyguy (12/06/2013) [-]
tarekmig @ miner
ferrettamer @ miner
kosmic @ woodworker
feferest @ mason
sonnyboii @ broker/stonecrafter
ajjurgens @ leader/farmer
mrperyite @ Farmer/bookkeeper
tiagodisouza @ metalworker
ghostninja @ Mitila-commander
desacabose @ farmer
feelythefeel @ farmer/hammerdwarf
mindsculptorjace @ child
thycupcake @ Planter
fillelindome @ Fishery worker/Soldier
rossthefaggot @ Marksdwarf
Gonnafly @ Dwarven child
phantomeins @ Sword-dwarf
MrDeadiron @ Axedwarf
muffinzexe @ Axedwarf
robotvoice @ Hammerdwarf
freedomreturns @ Marksdwarf
enviousjellyfish @ Speardwarf
hunterhunting @ God of bacon trinkets/captain of the Repost Team.

Update
Due to the long time of typing up the information to describe the events of the fort I am going to start to make videos on dwarf fortress! This also includes guides on how to play both modes in adventure mode and fortress mode! If you have any requests then just send me a message and I'll do my best to help in anyway I can. I will make another fort in the near future where you're all subjugated to the hell that is dwarf fortress! ... again!
#275 to #273 - niceguyguy (02/24/2014) [-]
The new dwarf fortress videos are now being made, here are the following victims.

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.

All videos will be uploaded to my channel, www.youtube.com/user/idiedie2. If you don't want to be part of this please send me a message. If you have any questions just ask in the comment section. Updates will be sporadic due to university work but will make answering questions and replying a top priority.
User avatar #287 to #275 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
First episode is now up! www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRqk0oh79lc&feature=youtu.be Was quite nervous recording as never done this before, will be better over time.

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.

Any questions, reply to this or post a comment.
User avatar #311 to #287 - mindsculptorjace (03/07/2014) [-]
Are you aware of a game called Towns?
User avatar #312 to #311 - niceguyguy (03/10/2014) [-]
I took a quick look at it, I might give it a go but I wouldn't feel right cheating on my babe dwarf fortress
#310 to #287 - tarekmig (02/28/2014) [-]
MFW the farm
MFW the farm
User avatar #309 to #287 - freedomreturns (02/27/2014) [-]
I'm liking it.
User avatar #306 to #287 - ghostninja ONLINE (02/27/2014) [-]
Holy **** that voice
User avatar #307 to #306 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
Is it good or bad? I'm generally confused.
User avatar #308 to #307 - ghostninja ONLINE (02/27/2014) [-]
damn damn goood good
User avatar #305 to #287 - tiagodisouza (02/27/2014) [-]
also its Tiago di Souza as in Ti-A-gou di So-u-za
User avatar #304 to #287 - tiagodisouza (02/27/2014) [-]
dat voice
User avatar #293 to #287 - feelythefeel (02/27/2014) [-]
I want to cuddle your voice.
User avatar #302 to #293 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
Damn these purple lines!
User avatar #300 to #293 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
Thank you, was quite nervous about my voice so it's a great pick me up, FJ wont let me reply to your other comment
User avatar #301 to #300 - feelythefeel (02/27/2014) [-]
It's the limit to prevent too many purple lines.
User avatar #295 to #293 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
B..but why?
User avatar #299 to #295 - feelythefeel (02/27/2014) [-]
I was joking, but you sound nice
User avatar #292 to #287 - sonnyboii (02/27/2014) [-]
Pretty good, id watch more. However the music was a lot louder than your voice at some points, lower that a bit and it would be quite entertaining
User avatar #296 to #292 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
Yeah I noticed that when I was editing, I lower it next time
User avatar #291 to #287 - muffinzexe (02/27/2014) [-]
**** yeah. Why only 4 minutes?
User avatar #294 to #291 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
Was testing the software that I had to download to make the video so only wanted it to be short, they're going to be longer videos in the future.
User avatar #290 to #287 - fillelindome (02/27/2014) [-]
If possible I think that increase the volime for your voice and lower the music a little bit, other than that, the quality was good, and fairly intresting to listen too
User avatar #297 to #290 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
Thank you for the feedback
User avatar #289 to #287 - desacabose (02/27/2014) [-]
is day sa ca bow sa though
#288 to #287 - desacabose (02/27/2014) [-]
Why doesn't anyone pronounce my name correctly
User avatar #303 to #288 - MrDeadiron (02/27/2014) [-]
Because its a stupid ass name honkey.
User avatar #298 to #288 - niceguyguy (02/27/2014) [-]
I'm really sorry, I can't pronounce stuff well haha, I'll try next video.
User avatar #285 to #275 - MrDeadiron (02/24/2014) [-]
where did you go?
User avatar #286 to #285 - niceguyguy (02/24/2014) [-]
Had a lot of work/personal stuff to deal with but I have a set schedule now to make videos whenever I can
User avatar #284 to #275 - feferest (02/24/2014) [-]
I forgot about dis
#283 to #275 - feferest has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #282 to #275 - tiagodisouza (02/24/2014) [-]
awwww yeah
User avatar #279 to #275 - niceguyguy (02/24/2014) [-]
Mistake in the link good old full stops to ruin your day. www.youtube.com/user/idiedie2

tarekmig, ferrettamer, kosmic, feferest, sonnyboii, ajjurgens, mrperyite, tiagodisouza ghostninja, desacabose, feelythefeel, mindsculptorjace, thycupcake, fillelindome rossthefaggot, Gonnafly, phantomeins, MrDeadiron, muffinzexe, robotvoice freedomreturns, enviousjellyfish, hunterhunting, mayron, outvalid.
User avatar #281 to #279 - sonnyboii (02/24/2014) [-]
yay!
User avatar #280 to #279 - desacabose (02/24/2014) [-]
aw yiss.png
#278 to #275 - desacabose has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #277 to #275 - tarekmig (02/24/2014) [-]
btw the channel does not exist?
User avatar #276 to #275 - tarekmig (02/24/2014) [-]
yus
#272 to #268 - muffinzexe (11/14/2013) [-]
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
User avatar #271 to #268 - feferest (11/14/2013) [-]
yus
User avatar #269 to #268 - tarekmig (11/14/2013) [-]
Wasted
User avatar #259 to #246 - tiagodisouza (10/23/2013) [-]
Oh my goblin raids this is getting intense poor Gonnafly even died. Muffin's as brutal as ever.
Now for the usual question to tend to leave in your posts:
What's this i hear about you building an arena, is this an actual thing?
and how do i capture animals
User avatar #260 to #259 - niceguyguy (10/23/2013) [-]
Yeah you dig out a small space underground and block it off with flood gates, then you release caged animals using a lever to fight to the death. First you need to build animal traps at a carpenters workshop, then you need to build a kennel and select the "Capture small animal" option.
User avatar #261 to #260 - tiagodisouza (10/23/2013) [-]
Alright thank you very much!
I have a slight problem, i made a danger room and made my whole squad go in there to train but some dogs also go in for some reason and one of them died and now the owner dwarf is really unhappy anyway to stop this?
Sorry for pestering you with all these questions
User avatar #262 to #261 - niceguyguy (10/23/2013) [-]
Decorate his room by smoothing it out and engraving it or place some more statues in your meeting hall.
User avatar #255 to #246 - muffinzexe (10/22/2013) [-]
I'm so proud of muffinaxe...
**** . Yeah.
User avatar #257 to #255 - niceguyguy (10/22/2013) [-]
Whoops, sorry for misspelling your name been a long day haha.
User avatar #258 to #257 - muffinzexe (10/22/2013) [-]
Heh, I thought it was on purpose because I'm an axedwarf.
#253 to #246 - Gonnafly ONLINE (10/22/2013) [-]
Noooooooooooo
User avatar #256 to #253 - muffinzexe (10/22/2013) [-]
R.I.P.
User avatar #254 to #253 - niceguyguy (10/22/2013) [-]
You will be replaced with one of your dwarfs relatives.
#250 to #246 - feelythefeel (10/22/2013) [-]
Wait, Gonnafly died?
Wait, Gonnafly died?
User avatar #251 to #250 - niceguyguy (10/22/2013) [-]
Yeah he got stabbed and slashed to death on his first day of adulthood going to rename another dwarf "Gonnafly Jr" to live his life.
User avatar #249 to #246 - MrDeadiron (10/22/2013) [-]
I like kicking things
User avatar #248 to #246 - rossthefaggot (10/22/2013) [-]
I am best fisherman
User avatar #247 to #246 - desacabose (10/22/2013) [-]
Magic
User avatar #242 to #235 - tiagodisouza (10/22/2013) [-]
This just gets better and better hahaha Muffin was pretty upset with the golbin wasn't he.
How does one set up an hospital?
User avatar #243 to #242 - niceguyguy (10/22/2013) [-]
Yeah he went a bit over board with the killing but it made it funny.

Here is information on hospitals: www.dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/Hospital
User avatar #244 to #243 - tiagodisouza (10/22/2013) [-]
Thank you, waiting eagerly for next post
User avatar #245 to #244 - niceguyguy (10/22/2013) [-]
No problem I'm new to building hospitals myself so that link helped me a lot, typing up the next part now.
User avatar #241 to #235 - phantomeins (10/21/2013) [-]
I didn't need that foot anyway.
#240 to #235 - feelythefeel (10/21/2013) [-]
Awesome.
Awesome.
User avatar #237 to #235 - thycupcake ONLINE (10/21/2013) [-]
Hope my arm won't go too badly.
At least I did something else than farm, didn't exactly know I had a bloody iron war hammer.
User avatar #239 to #237 - niceguyguy (10/21/2013) [-]
Well it's common for a dwarf to pass out from shock you're doing just fine in the hospital at the moment.
User avatar #236 to #235 - feferest (10/21/2013) [-]
cool, no tigers this time I guess
User avatar #238 to #236 - niceguyguy (10/21/2013) [-]
Couldn't get him out of the meeting hall, he didn't want to come out for some reason.
User avatar #228 to #222 - feelythefeel (10/19/2013) [-]
No need to apologize, you're doing a free service. Even if we did complain, we have no right
User avatar #225 to #222 - tiagodisouza (10/19/2013) [-]
Also no need to apologize, we really appretiate this, at least i do. And waiting a day isn't that bad
User avatar #226 to #225 - niceguyguy (10/19/2013) [-]
Thanks man, it means a lot. In response to your trading issues you need to assign a broker, you can do this through the nobles screen by pressing "n" make sure that you appoint a dwarf with the "Appraiser" skill, this is important as this will tell you what items are worth. Next you need to build a trade deport, you need to do this through the building menu "b" then press "D" place it outside of your fort. Make sure that traders can get to it by pressing "D" when traders are there and inside your deport press "q" then hover the cursor over the deport and make sure the setting is set to "Trader requested at deport" your broker will run to the deport and will be able to trade with the caravan when you press "t"

More information here:
dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/DF2012:Trade_depot
User avatar #227 to #226 - tiagodisouza (10/19/2013) [-]
Alright thanks!
My animals keep dying though, what should i do about this?
User avatar #229 to #227 - niceguyguy (10/19/2013) [-]
Ah yes, I have this problem from time to time too, any animal that eats grass but follows its master or just waits around in the meeting area. Set a zone outside on some grass make it medium sized. Then assign animals to it.

dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/Zones
#230 to #229 - tiagodisouza (10/19/2013) [-]
I did, i made a giant ass zone but my animals still die i only have chicken and ducks for now and a horse(besides the cats and dogs)
Sorry to be bothering you so much but what's an efficient way to make a wall with a gate or some form of entrance that i can close to help me defend the fortress? I'm starting to get raided and attacked by alot enemies and it'd helpi assume

Img is just the rooms in my fortress because i felt like it
User avatar #231 to #230 - niceguyguy (10/19/2013) [-]
Doors are good to use or bridges
User avatar #232 to #231 - tiagodisouza (10/19/2013) [-]
Do i have to make a pit or something to make a bridge? i dont really have a river or anything nearby
User avatar #233 to #232 - niceguyguy (10/19/2013) [-]
You can channel out a most with "d" then "h" or you can just make a retractable bridge as when you retract it, it acts as a wall.
User avatar #234 to #233 - tiagodisouza (10/19/2013) [-]
Alright thanks,
User avatar #224 to #222 - tiagodisouza (10/19/2013) [-]
Dude i'm so confused, How do i trade?
Also my animals keep starving, but this fortress is still doing good at 94 dwarves and a few legendary ones, i even got raided and survived with minimal casualities
User avatar #223 to #222 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/19/2013) [-]
its fine
User avatar #220 to #192 - robotvoice (10/18/2013) [-]
do I have purpose in the fortress?
does my life mean anything?
User avatar #218 to #192 - phantomeins (10/18/2013) [-]
Have I done anything useful since I lost my foot?
User avatar #219 to #218 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
Sad to say, not really. You have been drifting in and out of consciousness from blood loss. If you should die I'll rename one of your dwarves younger brothers after you.
User avatar #215 to #192 - MrDeadiron (10/18/2013) [-]
I dont do anything except insult elves apparently
User avatar #216 to #215 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
You're part of the Junk Guard, you often patrol around the fortress and train with your axe.
User avatar #221 to #216 - MrDeadiron (10/18/2013) [-]
dont try to make me feel better
User avatar #210 to #192 - feferest (10/18/2013) [-]
I am like the best dwarf
User avatar #213 to #210 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
Best at getting us the goods
User avatar #209 to #192 - desacabose (10/18/2013) [-]
Invade hell
User avatar #211 to #209 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
I don't think I'm good enough to fend off legions of demons just yet haha, want to keep this fort going for as long as possible.
User avatar #200 to #192 - tiagodisouza (10/18/2013) [-]
Full metal tiagodisouza SOOO MUCH YES i want this title!
User avatar #202 to #200 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
Title is now added to the list so you're now officially know as full metal tiagodisouza
User avatar #204 to #202 - tiagodisouza (10/18/2013) [-]
Awww **** ***** , thanks, that's one bad ass title
User avatar #205 to #204 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
Well you do deserve it, you spent years forging weapons which have killed titans, goblins, animals, and kobolds.
User avatar #206 to #205 - tiagodisouza (10/18/2013) [-]
When my dwarf dies my name shall go down in history and all blacksmiths will look up to me and try to be as good as me, also poor muffin got kill stealed
User avatar #207 to #206 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
Well we will have to see that in the legends mode when the fortress falls. Yeah it was a shame but the fighting did give him a boost of xp which is making him a better fighter.
User avatar #208 to #207 - tiagodisouza (10/18/2013) [-]
Legends mode? what is this?
Also danger rooms make your fighters stronger for cheap, i saw that somewgere
User avatar #212 to #208 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
It displays all of the history of your world everyone and everything is in it I know it does I have not had enough spare time to make it yet will make it soon though.
User avatar #214 to #212 - tiagodisouza (10/18/2013) [-]
Ah alright, i'm having some trouble with my fortress, as in keeping up with the food and whatnot, but i'm trying
User avatar #217 to #214 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
Keep trying its worth it, look at this video it has helped me a lot

www.youtube.com/watch?v=4g_SaPQpKbU
User avatar #197 to #192 - thycupcake ONLINE (10/18/2013) [-]
"Full metal Tiagodisouza", a title that would make him happy.
My pacifist-ish role of farming suits me, because I would never really want to fight to death, unless if it's in Muffinzexe's manner, utterly destroying that minotaur.


All of us really like these man.
User avatar #201 to #197 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
I thought it would You do have a mean streak which is quite funny, you did smash in someones guts. But your life is quite a simple one, you start the day with a meal then move onto the fields, then you spend the rest of the day training before falling asleep. Going to move your dwarf into a new room when I can, one that is smoothed out and decorated with statues.

Also thanks for the spoiler comment I'm glad I can provide some entertainment as dwarf fortress is really full of fun!
User avatar #196 to #192 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/18/2013) [-]
i shall harvest more food for mother russia dwarf fortress
User avatar #199 to #196 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
That's the spirit! Your dwarf is doing well at the moment, he she? Is one of the most influential dwarfs in the fort you know almost everyone.
User avatar #203 to #199 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/18/2013) [-]
nice
User avatar #195 to #192 - muffinzexe (10/18/2013) [-]
****** killstealers.
I wanted to have a titan on my kill list

I ******* love to read about your fort, i started one aswell.
User avatar #198 to #195 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
You did deserve that kill, you did the most work as you were the most skilled weapon user fighting it at the time.
User avatar #193 to #192 - tarekmig (10/18/2013) [-]
Do i even try to do anything else than just mine stuff and drink booze?
User avatar #194 to #193 - niceguyguy (10/18/2013) [-]
No that's pretty much all you do, you mine then get drunk then pass out in some random location and repeat the process haha.
User avatar #191 to #170 - MrDeadiron (10/17/2013) [-]
heh stupid elves
User avatar #190 to #170 - tiagodisouza (10/17/2013) [-]
I laughed when i read that thing bit someone's kneecaps off
User avatar #176 to #170 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/17/2013) [-]
That was...suprisingly intense. DF sounds fun as ****

i think im going to start playing it myself soon
User avatar #180 to #176 - niceguyguy (10/17/2013) [-]
If you need any help with places to get it or if you're not understanding anything with the game contact me and I'll help you out however I can.
User avatar #182 to #180 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/17/2013) [-]
Sure thing
Thanks, man
User avatar #184 to #182 - niceguyguy (10/17/2013) [-]
Anytime, friend! Also congratulations on your orange text.
User avatar #185 to #184 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/17/2013) [-]
Thanks
It only lasts for 3 days though *cri*
User avatar #186 to #185 - niceguyguy (10/17/2013) [-]
Oh that's a shame, what do you need to get colored text anyway, I heard that FJ points are important, whatever they are.
User avatar #187 to #186 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/17/2013) [-]
www.funnyjunk.com/text/4414790/Colored+Text+Winners/

you can also get coloured text when you make it onto this list
for that to happen, the users just have to thumb your comments
getting coloured text on random board isnt that hard, since there arent that many users there. i am regular there, so i get coloured text from time to time
User avatar #188 to #187 - niceguyguy (10/17/2013) [-]
Oh right, well if I'm in the random board I'll be sure to thumb your posts. I'm more of the advice board myself.
User avatar #189 to #188 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/17/2013) [-]
thanks
User avatar #175 to #170 - rossthefaggot (10/17/2013) [-]
Does this game require a good computer? I can see that it is not very graphically intensive but I would just like to ask

Also, it is very complicated with a steep learning curve and very complicated gameplay and stuff? Like how you're saying you made towers and a hospital, that all seems pretty hard from a Birds Eye View to me...
User avatar #177 to #175 - niceguyguy (10/17/2013) [-]
It is very complicated, I hardly use all of the options that are available this entire play through is played by a beginner I have been playing for almost a year now. This game keeps on getting better and there is an almost infinite amount of things you can do. You don't need a good computer to run this, it does look hard to build a hospital and a archery tower but it is easy once you get an idea of the controls. I would recommend learning to play this game, it's a lot like programming in a way. It looks really hard and some components are just down right impossible, but once you get an idea and have some knowledge under your belt you can do just about anything!
User avatar #178 to #177 - rossthefaggot (10/17/2013) [-]
Nice, and thanks

I've been thinking of buying it for a while now, will probably definitely now.

Can I ask where you bought it from? I dont know many sites to get games from cause im pretty new to pc gaming
User avatar #179 to #178 - niceguyguy (10/17/2013) [-]
I'm laughing at this post at the moment, and I really want to see your reaction to this next part: It's free, all of it is free and you can download it right now.

I would suggest to download the "Lazy Newb Pack" I use it exclusively it is so useful and it has the graphics packs so it saves you installing it.

Here's a link:
www.bay12forums.com/smf/?topic=59026.0

Download mirror 1 or 2 it makes no difference. To my knowledge.

Here is some links for you to look at if you need any help:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=4g_SaPQpKbU Very good video on the basics of the game.
dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/DF2012:Dwarf_fortress_mode A whole article on fortress mode and its different aspects.

If you have any trouble with any aspect of the game or downloads contact me and I'll help you with what I can
User avatar #181 to #179 - rossthefaggot (10/17/2013) [-]
Damn haha, after I'd been hearing of how complex it was and that I was sure it'd be pretty pricey. Oh well!

Thanks!
User avatar #183 to #181 - niceguyguy (10/17/2013) [-]
Haha well it is a logical conclusion to be fair.

Good luck with everything
#173 to #170 - rossthefaggot (10/17/2013) [-]
me and freedomreturns make a good team it seems
me and freedomreturns make a good team it seems
User avatar #174 to #173 - freedomreturns (10/17/2013) [-]
Damn straight, marksdwarf bros.
#171 to #170 - freedomreturns (10/17/2013) [-]
>MFW Goblins and Kobolds
>MFW Goblins and Kobolds
User avatar #163 to #155 - tiagodisouza (10/16/2013) [-]
Even if i have 1000 people to supply weapons to, i will not stop until all of them are slashing goblin's heads off
User avatar #164 to #163 - niceguyguy (10/16/2013) [-]
Well you did forge the very sword that got us our first goblin kill, it was ironically the first you made. Most of your weapons have tasted blood now, but more on that in the next post
User avatar #165 to #164 - tiagodisouza (10/16/2013) [-]
Oh my, this pleases my greatly, my first fortress died a couple of minutes ago due to a raid!
User avatar #166 to #165 - niceguyguy (10/16/2013) [-]
The first fortresses will die young, my first fort died due to a zombie attack, you need to keep playing and soon you wont be able to stop playing.
User avatar #167 to #166 - tiagodisouza (10/16/2013) [-]
Well it was extremely fun specially, looking at what my dwarfs do while idling and **** , one of them made a cool statue that everyone gets happy about
User avatar #168 to #167 - niceguyguy (10/16/2013) [-]
You wait until you have about 180 dwarves running around and doing stuff it's pretty crazy haha
User avatar #169 to #168 - tiagodisouza (10/16/2013) [-]
well i had around 60 something and it was a bit chaotic for me
User avatar #158 to #155 - feelythefeel (10/16/2013) [-]
Dwarves: They're grrrrreat!
User avatar #157 to #155 - MrDeadiron (10/16/2013) [-]
no kills fo me
User avatar #156 to #155 - feferest (10/16/2013) [-]
I is the best dwarf
User avatar #148 to #116 - feelythefeel (10/15/2013) [-]
Great. Please keep me posted, especially if my sexy lady dwarf ever bashes a goblin's skull in.
User avatar #150 to #148 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
Well the titan came back and is still lurking around at the moment so if you get a hit on it I'll mention it in the next post
User avatar #152 to #150 - feelythefeel (10/15/2013) [-]
Awesome.
User avatar #125 to #116 - tiagodisouza (10/15/2013) [-]
Yall ****** better love my armor cause it takes effort to make
User avatar #141 to #125 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
You're making really high-value weapons at the moment which is fantastic ;)
User avatar #149 to #141 - tiagodisouza (10/15/2013) [-]
Really? thats awesome, how do i go about changing my dwarf's names ingame? they all have unpronouncable stuff
User avatar #151 to #149 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
You're telling me! The other dwarfs love your iron weapons at the moment, you need to use "k" to then hover your little "x" over them and then press enter and it should say customize then you press "n" to enter in a nickname.
User avatar #153 to #151 - tiagodisouza (10/15/2013) [-]
That's pretty cool ahaha, i knew i'd be a good smith!
would you mind sending me a message on my profile or something with my dwarf's thoughts and all that jazz?
thanks for the info btw
User avatar #124 to #116 - rossthefaggot (10/15/2013) [-]
Is Marksdwarf like an archer?
User avatar #126 to #124 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
Yeah dwarves can only use crossbows due to their small hands so they can only become marksdwarfs
User avatar #129 to #126 - rossthefaggot (10/15/2013) [-]
nice, is he the best of the Marksdwarfs? Or has he been slackin'?
User avatar #130 to #129 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
Well he is the best dwarf we have in marksmanship, you teach classes to the other dwarves of proper crossbow use. Or though you had to be removed from captain as your dwarf was becoming mentally ill due to the responsibility he is the best we got you also have a iron crossbow.
User avatar #132 to #130 - muffinzexe (10/15/2013) [-]
Will you post a ranking of the millitary dwarves with their kills and all?
User avatar #137 to #132 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
Of course, I'll provide a list of all military dwarves and their skills when I make the next post. No one has gotten a kill in combat yet but some of you have hunted small game like boars or rabbits.
User avatar #139 to #137 - muffinzexe (10/15/2013) [-]
Nice to hear.
I hope I'll kill a titan/forgotten beast
User avatar #140 to #139 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
I hope we will be able to find one, I'm not great at this game but I have the basics down finding a forgotten beast will be awesome, that's the way I'd like to go out.
User avatar #142 to #140 - muffinzexe (10/15/2013) [-]
Ah, alright. You know alot more details than me. Can you maybe send me the save folder some time?
User avatar #144 to #142 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
I will try to figure out how to send files haha, I'm not the best when it comes to folders and what not.
User avatar #145 to #144 - muffinzexe (10/15/2013) [-]
Well, just go into the Dwarf Fortress folder, then Data and saves.
You put the folder you use into an archive and then you upload it somewhere and send me the link.
You could also send it to me on Skype.
My Skypename is: onkelmuffin
User avatar #147 to #145 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
You get it okay?
User avatar #146 to #145 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
Just sending it across now, you you enjoy it
User avatar #154 to #146 - muffinzexe (10/15/2013) [-]
Wait, where did you send it?
User avatar #134 to #132 - rossthefaggot (10/15/2013) [-]
pl0x do this
User avatar #122 to #116 - muffinzexe (10/15/2013) [-]
Woo, I like the way my dwarf talks.
User avatar #121 to #116 - freedomreturns (10/15/2013) [-]
I am best shemale dwarf archer.
Seriously though, glad to see Im not dead yet.
User avatar #131 to #121 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
Well you're on par with hunterhunting you both possess a lot of skill and you're really good with shooting people in the kidneys for some reason, when your dwarf goes hunting he always seems to hit boars in the side?
User avatar #133 to #131 - freedomreturns (10/15/2013) [-]
Which one of us got that kid in the neck?
User avatar #136 to #133 - niceguyguy (10/15/2013) [-]
I think rossthefaggot got it in the neck, you were too busy filling its gut with copper bolts, this thing was bleeding everywhere I kid you not.
User avatar #138 to #136 - freedomreturns (10/15/2013) [-]
Jesus. Can't wait to hear more stories!
User avatar #117 to #116 - tarekmig (10/15/2013) [-]
Me and feferest always will be making the best sex toys
User avatar #118 to #117 - feferest (10/15/2013) [-]
ofcourse bby
User avatar #119 to #118 - tarekmig (10/15/2013) [-]
Those toys better smell like ass
User avatar #120 to #119 - feferest (10/15/2013) [-]
I don't usem them, 2small4me, I am showing an stone table I made up my ass
User avatar #123 to #120 - tarekmig (10/15/2013) [-]
Damn
I can only shove a dwarf over my urethra
#108 to #93 - hunterhunting (10/15/2013) [-]
Omg jack, I just read the part under noticeable events that means a lot to me. Thankyou so much and I'm always here for you man. If you ever need your dick sucked someone to talk to I'm your girl guy undecided? best friend. Much love from the east coast east siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide, Hunter (Steve) And just to make response sound a bit gayer for your viewer I present to you a heart I ripped it from a dead goat. Then I beat it repeatedly with my shoe. No. I did not kick it. I beat it. With my shoe.
#107 to #93 - hunterhunting (10/15/2013) [-]
Lol omg jack, I'm dying here. Thankyou for gracing me with this post you magnificent bastard. Maybe I'll even start playing this game if you can help me a bit since I already own it and sort of understand how to play. Btw, way to forget how you tried making a forge out of charcoal you stupid ****** lol but nah really love you man, thanks. I'm so reading these
User avatar #103 to #93 - feferest (10/14/2013) [-]
yuuus tiger
User avatar #101 to #93 - tiagodisouza (10/14/2013) [-]
yes mystrong arm shall make fine weapons and armor

i'd like to know stuff about my dwarf if you dont mind
User avatar #100 to #93 - muffinzexe (10/14/2013) [-]
Now I notice that I'd rather be a stone craftsdwarve that crafts some crafts all day that you sell until I get to be legendary.
User avatar #98 to #93 - MrDeadiron (10/14/2013) [-]
im still a recruit bah
User avatar #97 to #93 - sonnyboii (10/14/2013) [-]
I said i would craft something awesome
User avatar #95 to #93 - tarekmig (10/14/2013) [-]
Thats some good booze i say
User avatar #94 to #93 - ajjurgens (10/14/2013) [-]
i love you for this
#66 to #56 - feelythefeel (10/13/2013) [-]
Why did you have to link to Leaves from the Vine? God damn it, just... god damn it.
Why did you have to link to Leaves from the Vine? God damn it, just... god damn it.
User avatar #67 to #66 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
It is the most emotional piece of music I know, thought it added to the description ;) But seriously that episode was really hard to watch.
User avatar #68 to #67 - feelythefeel (10/13/2013) [-]
It's my favorite.
User avatar #61 to #56 - tiagodisouza (10/13/2013) [-]
This just keeps getting better and better
User avatar #59 to #56 - mindsculptorjace (10/13/2013) [-]
Can I see my info?
User avatar #57 to #56 - sonnyboii (10/13/2013) [-]
Ill craft all of you something really ******* cool, just you wait
#51 to #49 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/13/2013) [-]
The mental image of rossthefaggot sitting in front of cage in the middle of a field while trying to teach a fish to do tricks made me laugh really hard
The mental image of rossthefaggot sitting in front of cage in the middle of a field while trying to teach a fish to do tricks made me laugh really hard
User avatar #52 to #51 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
I hope the music complimented it, I couldn't think of a better song to go with it.
User avatar #53 to #52 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/13/2013) [-]
the music made the whole experience even better
User avatar #54 to #53 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
Working on the next posts now, you're going to love it
User avatar #50 to #49 - freedomreturns (10/13/2013) [-]
Cool, I got a crossbow, what's his likes and dislikes?
User avatar #47 to #25 - kosmic ONLINE (10/12/2013) [-]
Woodworker? More like the fairy bed maker.
User avatar #48 to #47 - niceguyguy (10/13/2013) [-]
Well you did chase off another kobold with a battleaxe, their numbers are increasing as we keep exporting arts and crafts of high value.
User avatar #44 to #25 - feelythefeel (10/12/2013) [-]
Good job. What's my dwarf like? He hasn't gotten much notable spotlight other than helping people with small jobs, so I haven't gotten much of a picture for it.
User avatar #45 to #44 - niceguyguy (10/12/2013) [-]
Some jobs will get more of the spot light I'm afraid, I can post his thoughts and likes/dislikes on your profile if you like? He is awesome with a war-hammer though so in the future you're going to be on the front lines.
User avatar #46 to #45 - feelythefeel (10/12/2013) [-]
Awesome. Please tell me more.
User avatar #39 to #25 - mindsculptorjace (10/12/2013) [-]
I'll do you proud, papa!
User avatar #36 to #25 - feferest (10/12/2013) [-]
I feel like I am doing something with my life.

me and kosmic #best workers 2k13
User avatar #37 to #36 - niceguyguy (10/12/2013) [-]
Haha yeah you both are doing the fort wonders at the moment the rest of the dwarves are getting happy thoughts from your craftsmanship.
User avatar #33 to #25 - sonnyboii (10/12/2013) [-]
Haha, oh wow. I keep stealing alcohol huh
User avatar #35 to #33 - niceguyguy (10/12/2013) [-]
Yeah you keep nicking all of the ale which is making the others especially mrperyite wonder why they don't have as much.
User avatar #38 to #35 - sonnyboii (10/12/2013) [-]
Hehe, pretty cool
Wish i could get into Dwarf fortress. Started up a game but had no idea what the heck was going on
User avatar #43 to #38 - niceguyguy (10/12/2013) [-]
Here is a good place to start if you want to read up on it:
dwarffortresswiki.org/
Or if you prefer to watch an educational video on it:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=4g_SaPQpKbU
And of course you will need to get the game so I would suggest the lazy newb pack:
www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=59026.0
Download mirror one or two there is no real difference.
User avatar #28 to #25 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/12/2013) [-]
I feel even more important now

id like to see my dwarfs thoughts etc., please
User avatar #29 to #28 - ajjurgens (10/12/2013) [-]
if you have time i would also like to see mine
User avatar #27 to #25 - ajjurgens (10/12/2013) [-]
Ill be the best mayor any town has ever met

in time
#26 to #25 - ajjurgens (10/12/2013) [-]
desacabose and tiagodisouza are sleeping together
desacabose and tiagodisouza are sleeping together
User avatar #30 to #26 - tiagodisouza (10/12/2013) [-]
ooooh my
User avatar #31 to #30 - ajjurgens (10/12/2013) [-]
so whos the woman in the relationship? i mean you have four children
User avatar #32 to #31 - tiagodisouza (10/12/2013) [-]
desacabose is , im a goddamn smith mayng
User avatar #40 to #32 - desacabose (10/12/2013) [-]
niceguyguy you ************
User avatar #42 to #40 - tiagodisouza (10/12/2013) [-]
ahahahahah bend over honey we gun have sum babies
User avatar #34 to #32 - ajjurgens (10/12/2013) [-]
a woman farmer ooo
User avatar #24 to #20 - ajjurgens (10/12/2013) [-]
i like this a lot
User avatar #23 to #20 - tiagodisouza (10/12/2013) [-]
Poor kobold's afraid of a kitty
User avatar #22 to #20 - tarekmig (10/12/2013) [-]
God damn ******* booze, shouldn't drank alot of it.
User avatar #19 to #14 - tiagodisouza (10/12/2013) [-]
This sounds so cool mayng, i've just started my game and its going ok i guess
User avatar #18 to #14 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/12/2013) [-]
also, what will be the name of our fortress?
User avatar #21 to #18 - niceguyguy (10/12/2013) [-]
Our fortress name is "Covensmith"
#16 to #14 - mrperyite **User deleted account** (10/12/2013) [-]
i feel so important
#15 to #14 - sonnyboii (10/12/2013) [-]
Yes, this will turn out good
#1 - SnacksJr (04/13/2013) [-]
Hey, your my ******* friend now. You have no choice in this matter.

So hows it going bro?
 Friends (0)