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Level 171 Comments: Soldier Of Funnyjunk
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Bored? Have Netflix?
Tale of a lost...
Greatest phone ever
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- yo, just read through the tale of a lost boy and for the third…
- F5 F5 F5 F5 F5
Anon's trip to the woods
Toms just sat in his sleeping bag. we shine a torch on him and he's sweaty (no surprise there, he had just sprinted like 3 miles), but his eyes are open wide, he looks just plain ill. Pale and shivery, his eyes keep darting from place. That's when we realise this wasn't a fucking joke, he cant be that good an actor. We keep asking him what he saw but he tells us to shut the fuck up.
We then settle down to sleep. To be honest, everybody was still in two minds. I guess we tried to make ourselves believe he was messing with us, because that's a hell of a lot easier to deal with than if he wasn't. Now, the campsite we were staying on was empty aside from us. It was the middle of january, so obviously nobody in their right mind wants to freeze their tits off in a field then, so we had the place to ourselves. The family that owns the campsite weren't staying in their house next to the field we were in, someone was just there the other day to get us checked in and then left because there wasn't any point sticking around to maintain the campsite when it was just our small group.
So yeah, we settled down to sleep, somewhat uncomfortably, and then people were woken by something like this noise.
yeah, i know someone will say it was probably just a fox, i fucking hope it was. But it sounded a lot deeper and went on for a good few seconds, so it didn't sound exactly like a fox at all. This weird horrible screeching noise happened a few times for a few minutes then stopped. It was about 4.30am, i remember because I had this explorer watch on my dad gave me for my birthday that had glow in the dark hands on the watch face, so that time is kind of burned into my memory.
seriously that fucking noise. i could tell my friend ben and aidan were awake because their silhouettes in the dark were frozen, they weren't the ones of a relaxed sleeping person. But nobody spoke. the sounds didn't sound close, but they didn't sound anywhere near far enough for us to relax. after a few minutes, maybe 10 or so, they stopped. I got some sleep, but woke up drained, i got literally 2 hours sleep at the most. None of us really spoke to each other, but apparently the person sharing with tom said when the noises happened he started whispering to himself and asking for his mum.
So yeah, we were all pretty miserable, vaguely freaked out, but more pissed off that none of us slept and we're thinking toms fucking with us. So me and ben leave the group and head back up to the barn for the torch. we pass through the village, I stop at the tiny post office for a drink (mango rubicon, fucking sexy), and ask the shop owner if we get any foxes or anything that sounds like a fox out here. She says no, foxes are urban creatures, there's nothing like a fox out here. So i internally shit myself because i was really hoping that it i could put it down to just being a fox, and we could go home and left this off.
still not finished bear with me
R, R, R.
So i buy my drink, drink it, and continue heading up to the barn with ben. He tells me the rest of the group is coming too because they're bored of sitting around. me and ben sit on a stone wall and wait for them to catch up. Toms there too, but he looks more miserable than anyone else. We carry on towards the barn and when it eventually comes into view, tom flips a bit and refuses to go any further. He doesn't freak out, he just looks angry. He's saying he's had enough of the fucking woods, fuck this, fuck that, etc. then he stops looking angry and looks like he's about to cry. Aidan offers to sit with him on the wall while the rest of us go and have a look for the torch, and have a look around the barn.
like I said, we still kind of thought he was bullshitting, plus it was daylight, so we're feeling more confident.
Hurry up little nigga
it has been done below <3
didn't mean to reply that early but oh well.
So we all head up to the barn, walk in, looks like a regular barn. if any of you have played DayZ, it looks like the barn in that, but made out of stone rather than wood. Toms torch is smashed to fucking pieces. It doesn't look like anythings fallen or stepped on it, it looks like it's been picked up and flung at the wall over and over again because there are bits everywhere. and Tom was right, it did fucking stink in there. Like if you've ever left something in the fridge too long, and you open the doors, and that cold sour stench comes out, it was like that. We basically nope the fuck out of there and head back to our tents.
Now this is the thing. Like i've said, we had the entire campsite to ourselves. Nobody at the village knew we were staying there, I didn't tell the female shopkeeper, and even if they did, the village is inhabited by mostly 60 year olds, so i doubt any of them would have done anything like what we returned to.
Our tent is smashed to bits. Like someones jumped on it, and generally wrecked the fuck out of it. The metal poles that were holding it up are snapped. Metal. Snapped.
pic related, its the tent. We texted bens mum and she came and picked us up and we fucked out of there. When she asked us what happened with the tent, we just said it blew down. I still don't know what the fuck tom saw, he's moved away now to university, but i dont fucking want to know what it was.
Why do you not want to know what it was? Hell, if this story was true, I wouldn´t calm down until Tom told me what the fuck he saw.
Tom is always the one who faces the creepy shi*
Another story with a Tom in the these comments
i see what you mean, but like i've said, no one has to believe me. his name is tom, he's a real guy.
this is a picture of some bacon i fried in beer when we were camping and it was fucking delicious.
Next por favor
- did you go get your camp equipment afterwards?
Anon's trip to the woods
we got somebody to get our climbing equipment back for us but our tent and sleeping bags and shit was destroyed. so he collected them and just threw them away.
Were any of the areas mentioned in this near where that story took place?
ooof, man this thread is bringing me back, but if anything, we WERE near Tunnel ridge road in the red river gorge.
Like I said we kinda camped in the unmanaged part of the forest, but yeah...
Climbing is a dangerous sport, sad to hear about those people gone missing, I had no idea.
- i've had a horrible hangover for the whole day and now im drin…
Everyone hates Monday
describe your poop in a...
- vähä khyl fiilikset niinku sun kuvassa. lomautettuna, uniryt…
Kyl se siit. Ittelläki on täl hetkel menossa Top jakso ja sit siel työpaikal ei oo töitä... Fiilikset kohillaan mennä paikan päälle, kun ei oo muutaku sormien pyörittelyä.
Kyl se siit.
I'd love to go to Finland some day. Also I wonder how your/their ancestors were doing with that fucklong winter night.
- forgot to log in
- did you know that "hai" means shark in finland also.
Tom, you have no idea....
and haai means shark in Afrikaans, a South African language derived from Dutch
- im missing my impreza turbo WRX and im glad it didnt have that…
- yeah and haqq would be most likely getting raped by red thumbs…
Only if the anon had come off as a sensitive, caring individual who didn't deserve to be looked down upon, but who people could feel sympathy for.
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