matexius

Rank #4377 on Comments
matexius Avatar Level 229 Comments: Mind Blower
Offline
Send mail to matexius Block matexius Invite matexius to be your friend flag avatar
Last status update:
-
Personal Info
Interests: Music, Games, TV, Internet
Date Signed Up:6/11/2012
Last Login:1/26/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#4377
Highest Content Rank:#3806
Highest Comment Rank:#1928
Content Thumbs: 1871 total,  2337 ,  466
Comment Thumbs: 3564 total,  3934 ,  370
Content Level Progress: 26% (26/100)
Level 118 Content: Funny Junkie → Level 119 Content: Funny Junkie
Comment Level Progress: 0% (0/100)
Level 229 Comments: Mind Blower → Level 230 Comments: Ambassador Of Lulz
Subscribers:0
Content Views:119353
Times Content Favorited:139 times
Total Comments Made:1944
FJ Points:3405
Favorite Tags: are cool (2) | it burns (2)

Show:
Sort by:
Order:

funny pictures

  • Views: 44827
    Thumbs Up 1252 Thumbs Down 231 Total: +1021
    Comments: 50
    Favorites: 70
    Uploaded: 12/28/12
    The 11th... turtle? The 11th... turtle?
  • Views: 14280
    Thumbs Up 234 Thumbs Down 36 Total: +198
    Comments: 52
    Favorites: 4
    Uploaded: 12/26/13
    Do you? Do you?
  • Views: 15208
    Thumbs Up 226 Thumbs Down 40 Total: +186
    Comments: 20
    Favorites: 14
    Uploaded: 11/17/13
    This is why I like this guy so much This is why I like this guy so much
  • Views: 7753
    Thumbs Up 182 Thumbs Down 16 Total: +166
    Comments: 9
    Favorites: 16
    Uploaded: 12/22/12
    The Doctor and the Universe The Doctor and the Universe
  • Views: 12069
    Thumbs Up 184 Thumbs Down 39 Total: +145
    Comments: 64
    Favorites: 13
    Uploaded: 12/01/12
    10 VS 11 10 VS 11
  • Views: 6954
    Thumbs Up 80 Thumbs Down 23 Total: +57
    Comments: 8
    Favorites: 10
    Uploaded: 12/25/12
    Skyrim wallpaper Skyrim wallpaper
1 2 > [ 12 Funny Pictures Total ]
Show:
Sort by:
Order:

youtube videos

  • Views: 4911
    Thumbs Up 47 Thumbs Down 9 Total: +38
    Comments: 5
    Favorites: 8
    Uploaded: 02/20/13
    11 being 11 11 being 11

latest user's comments

#109 - I'm not gonna lie... True... Well...it wasn't an insult..…  [+] (1 new reply) 3 hours ago on Happy Austraila Day +1
#110 - skeletorexplains (3 hours ago) [-]
There was no insult, Just a Stereotype joke!

Also fuck the platypus, Gods Randomized character.
#105 - I was just making a joke. I mean, that girl is hot as all …  [+] (3 new replies) 3 hours ago on Happy Austraila Day 0
#107 - skeletorexplains (3 hours ago) [-]
The joke here was stereotypes.
User avatar #109 - matexius (3 hours ago) [-]
I'm not gonna lie... True...
Well...it wasn't an insult... I mean, I love the Australians, my uncle had one here for a little while, the guy was/is awesome... if everyone there's like that, I'd totally go to live there... Although... I'd just have to pack a Flammenwerfer... on a Continent where a fukken platypus can send you to a hospital, well...
#110 - skeletorexplains (3 hours ago) [-]
There was no insult, Just a Stereotype joke!

Also fuck the platypus, Gods Randomized character.
#88 - God damn, that's one Hell of a Sheila... That's what Auss…  [+] (6 new replies) 4 hours ago on Happy Austraila Day 0
#97 - skeletorexplains (3 hours ago) [-]
I guess? Why what do you call women in America, manatees?
User avatar #106 - tenaciouslee (3 hours ago) [-]
Nah, we call them eagles.



Because freedoms.
#105 - matexius (3 hours ago) [-]
I was just making a joke. I mean, that girl is hot as all fuck...

Manatees? Wasn't it established that they're land-whales, I just call them walrus..
Where I'm from we call them punca, dekle (girl), gospodična (miss), dama (lady), ženska (woman) or baba which is an insult and doesn't exactly have a translation...
Do you even Slav tovarish?
#107 - skeletorexplains (3 hours ago) [-]
The joke here was stereotypes.
User avatar #109 - matexius (3 hours ago) [-]
I'm not gonna lie... True...
Well...it wasn't an insult... I mean, I love the Australians, my uncle had one here for a little while, the guy was/is awesome... if everyone there's like that, I'd totally go to live there... Although... I'd just have to pack a Flammenwerfer... on a Continent where a fukken platypus can send you to a hospital, well...
#110 - skeletorexplains (3 hours ago) [-]
There was no insult, Just a Stereotype joke!

Also fuck the platypus, Gods Randomized character.
#59 - What are the restrictions for homebrew characters, if you don'…  [+] (2 new replies) 9 hours ago on What is D&D? The Wizard 0
#79 - anonymous (2 hours ago) [-]
If you have a player's handbook:
Check the abilities for the closest class (wizard or sorcerer) and see what their abilities do. If you stay in roughly that range you should be fine.
But also read up on status effects, a spell that makes the target helpless is infinitely stronger than one that slows.
Since a Necromancer is esentially a Wizard with Death-magic you should also be able to use the Wizard template well.
If your DM has experience, let him look it over, if he doesn't just go for it, but don't be an ass when he says it's too strong and needs to be changed retroactively.
#61 - seraphunbound (8 hours ago) [-]
That's the great thing about DnD, friend. You can do whatever you want, as long as your DM is cool with it. A good baseline to follow is that if the spell or ability doesn't cost anything (or much of anything) and creates a powerful advantage or effect, it probably needs to be nerfed, or have a significant cost added to it. That is why most high level or extremely powerful spells have either an EXP point cost or valuable materiel component attached to them.
#46 - I think it's to brand the users that are less than a month/few…  [+] (1 new reply) 10 hours ago on Starter Packs +1
#97 - redresume (5 hours ago) [-]
Probably. I like it here.
#80 - Picture 19 hours ago on Oh shit nigger, what are... 0
#41 - WHAT? Ok, that's just rude as **** ... …  [+] (3 new replies) 21 hours ago on Oh shit nigger, what are... +3
#46 - torazn (20 hours ago) [-]
Don't you mean delicious as fuck?
#80 - matexius (19 hours ago) [-]
User avatar #42 - demandsgayversion (21 hours ago) [-]
That is the cutest baby water bat ever
#26 - Picture 21 hours ago on It's funny because of boobs +9
#38 - I'm ashamed to say that... I have absolutely no idea what's go…  [+] (6 new replies) 21 hours ago on Oh shit nigger, what are... +1
User avatar #40 - guanyu (21 hours ago) [-]
Looks like delicious fresh orange juice. It's a lie.
User avatar #39 - demandsgayversion (21 hours ago) [-]
cheese water look like juice on unsuspected victim
#41 - matexius (21 hours ago) [-]
WHAT? Ok, that's just rude as fuck...

Thanks for explaining it though...
#46 - torazn (20 hours ago) [-]
Don't you mean delicious as fuck?
#80 - matexius (19 hours ago) [-]
User avatar #42 - demandsgayversion (21 hours ago) [-]
That is the cutest baby water bat ever
#23 - Speak for yourself... 01/23/2015 on Happens all the time 0

user's channels

Join Subscribe animemanga
Join Subscribe doctor-who
Join Subscribe lol-channel
Join Subscribe skyrim
Join Subscribe warhammer40k
Show:
Sort by:
Order:

items

Total unique items point value: 24968 / Total items point value: 48815
[ 79 items Total ]

Show All Replies Show Shortcuts
Per page:
Order:
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #49 - kimjongnam (06/24/2014) [-]
That comment of yours went by quicker Rebecca Black's moment of fame.
User avatar #50 to #49 - matexius (06/24/2014) [-]
Quite... I hate being unprofesional.

Forgeting the reaction picture is one of those cases... it bring shame to Motherland...
I take making people laugh very seriously...
#51 to #50 - kimjongnam (06/24/2014) [-]
Finally! I've found a dedicated hard working capitalistic swine that is aware of all the dishonor he brings.
Finally! I've found a dedicated hard working capitalistic swine that is aware of all the dishonor he brings.
#52 to #51 - matexius (06/24/2014) [-]
Swine? No... in Mother Россия we eat Swine.   
And people who bring shame is sent to GULag.
Swine? No... in Mother Россия we eat Swine.
And people who bring shame is sent to GULag.
#53 to #52 - kimjongnam (06/24/2014) [-]
Russia you say? I mistook you for a fat Oh Bama cocksucker.
User avatar #54 to #53 - matexius (06/24/2014) [-]
Nyet tovarish... Obama destroy world. USA turn city to desert, steals oil. Bad business, may good look, but is bad.
Communism only way to survive.
User avatar #44 to #43 - matexius (02/07/2014) [-]
Where do you even find these?
User avatar #45 to #44 - krasnogvardiech (02/07/2014) [-]
The Traditional Games board on 4chan, /tg/. That is one of the sole good places on that site.
User avatar #46 to #45 - matexius (02/07/2014) [-]
Considering some of the sutff I've seen on 4chan...I have to agree...
User avatar #47 to #46 - krasnogvardiech (02/07/2014) [-]
/k/'s alright too. It's got decent content, anyway.
#33 - krasnogvardiech (02/03/2014) [-]
Heretical this may be, it is a message that is needing to be spread.
User avatar #34 to #33 - matexius (02/03/2014) [-]
Don't worry I'll be sure to put this when I find relevance.
And here are some of my... thingyes:
1. We are just human, and even Immortals and Gods... get older, while it doesn't show on their outside... they still gosh-damn do.
2. Killing Xenos might be a problem, considering...well...Carnifexs and Nemesors, etc. Though...everything has a weakness. Be it Tyranids, Necrons, Tau,...
Finding the Tyranid Hivemind could be a serious advantage, of course it they have one, something like a huge creature, that controls every Tyranid, if not...capturing and studying a Tyranid might reveal a way to make them destroy themselves.
3. Humans were/will be/are not perfect, Chaos can corrupt us, no matter how righteous our intentions are... Humans are a selfish race, afterall. No matter who leads us, be it The Emperor in his Golden armor or a regular human in a tie.
4. Why can't we all just get along?
I'm gonna put a few pics below, a few might be useful...
#35 to #34 - matexius (02/03/2014) [-]
This could come in handy...
#36 to #35 - matexius (02/03/2014) [-]
Baneblade tank...

Holy Emperor...
#37 to #36 - matexius (02/03/2014) [-]
This guy's badass...
#38 to #37 - matexius (02/03/2014) [-]
You might already have this one

Go on, Click it...
#39 to #38 - matexius (02/03/2014) [-]
Farnsworth...

That cap looks... familiar?
#40 to #39 - matexius (02/03/2014) [-]
DAVE, CALM YOUR THRUSTERS FOR THE EMPERORS SAKE!!!!

Some people have no self-control...
#41 to #40 - matexius (02/03/2014) [-]
And...because I'm getting SC2: Heart of the Swarm in a few weeks... this is just something I found on the interwebz.

If you ever decide to play it...this guy... is...well...awesome...
#42 to #41 - krasnogvardiech (02/03/2014) [-]
I had everything except for Dave. God-Emperor damn it, Dave!
#23 - krasnogvardiech (10/23/2013) [-]
It was my honour to bring you in to the glory of the Forty-First Mullenium.
User avatar #24 to #23 - matexius (10/23/2013) [-]
*Internet Brofist*
#25 to #24 - krasnogvardiech (10/23/2013) [-]
Myself, what captured me was the God-Emperor of Mankind. And y'know what, the thing that really got me was the actual humanity of the guy.

He's a dictator, who enforced harsh measures, but he was the most damn honest one mankind's ever had, and he had our best interests truly in heart.
He came up from Central Anatolia, 8000 BC, and for thirty millenia guided mankind - ALL humankind - from the back-scenes until he finally had enough somewhere near M23.
Even the guy's very existence is one of sacrifice. His creation? Tens if not hundreds of thousands of powerful psykers - world leaders, tribal shamans, witch-doctors and great philosophers just to name a few - all of them reincarnated as one into this massive legend of a person.

Honestly speaking, if the Emperor was a real being I would go with him. He simply has the best interests of us as a whole in heart.
User avatar #26 to #25 - matexius (10/23/2013) [-]
Read about him like 10 minutes ago.
Sadly all that sustains him now is ancient tech and pure will power. I have to respect that, even if he is a dictator, but hey...
#29 to #26 - krasnogvardiech (10/23/2013) [-]
He's remaining in existence through sheer force of will.

Literally, a real man doesn't die, even when he's killed.

I will love you if you get this reference. Only a little homo.
#27 to #26 - krasnogvardiech has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #28 to #27 - matexius (10/23/2013) [-]
Gurren lagan?
#31 to #30 - matexius (10/23/2013) [-]
Yoko is hot and pretty much on my list of ''Girls I want to get into bed, before I die'' list, which I'm pretty sure everyone has...
I mean come on, just try to maintain eye contact!
User avatar #32 to #31 - krasnogvardiech (10/24/2013) [-]
Hehe. Everybody.

She's 21 post-timeskip, by the way.
#1 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
HERE WE GO, SKIY OF BROS.

Hm. It seems that I've taken your profile comment virginity.

Dohoho.

Steampunk/Deep sea dump is a go! Not all of them are backgrounds, however.
User avatar #5 to #1 - matexius (08/20/2013) [-]
Too bad I can't give thumbs <here>.
#7 to #5 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Comments... comments never change.

People do. Through the comments they post.
#9 to #7 - matexius (08/20/2013) [-]
No matter, how much I tell it to myself. It still sounds wierd.
User avatar #11 to #9 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
As deep as the sea you asked me to post?
User avatar #15 to #11 - matexius (08/20/2013) [-]
Depends where in the sea.
#2 to #1 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Not exactly Deep-Sea, but it counts, right?
#3 to #2 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
I have Steampunk Spartans. I don't remember how I got these.
#4 to #3 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Underwater at least?
#8 to #6 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Does this count?

Personally, I prefer open, airy skies and airports over deep-sea things. I guess you'll be the Nuclear-Submarine captain while I'll be the Air Ace, right?
User avatar #13 to #8 - matexius (08/20/2013) [-]
I would prefer yes. I loved the book 20,000 leagues under the sea.
Well, if I ever will be. We'll have to meet eachother for a cup of tea on either my submarine or your sky-ship.
User avatar #16 to #13 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Skyship meets Submarine. I like the sound of that a lot.
#21 to #16 - matexius (08/20/2013) [-]
I understand that
While everyone else looks for the sky and beyond for freedom, I look towards the endless prairies, the deepest abyss and the darkest reaches of the deep sea. While above the surface, the strongest tempest rages, I dive into the seas calm arms. In the deep blue, the world on land is nothing more than a distant memory, fading away.
Word of advice: If you ever go to the deep. NEVER sing the Jaws Theme song.
#10 to #8 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
What I should have opened this dump with.
User avatar #17 to #10 - matexius (08/20/2013) [-]
I can so see that line in the movie, if they did it of course.
#12 to #10 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
I am Russia. Very cute and sex.
#19 to #18 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
As an appreciator of marine craft even though my preference is in the aeronautical field, this makes me sad. Such a good boat.
#20 to #19 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
This is all I'll be posting for now. It's 2 AM here and my eyelids are getting twitchy.
User avatar #22 to #20 - matexius (08/20/2013) [-]
Goodbye, my high-flying friend.
 Friends (0)