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|#55 - He never went through slavery in the first place... [+] (8 new replies)||12/08/2013 on Slavery||+20|
|#53361 - If people don't fight this then I'm going to be very dissapoin…||12/08/2013 on Politics - politics news,...||0|
|#47480 - People also kill people.||12/08/2013 on Religion Board||+1|
|#47479 - I believe he existed, yes. Although I'm not atheist.||12/08/2013 on Religion Board||0|
|#106122 - Sit them down and explain to them that you are an Atheist. If … [+] (1 new reply)||12/08/2013 on Advice - love advice,...||+2|
|#106121 - Okay, so my girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 9 mon… [+] (32 new replies)||12/08/2013 on Advice - love advice,...||0|
#106136 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
She said they were talking about how everyone is saying they had sex and did stuff when they were dating over a year ago and a month before we started dating, when they didn't. But that was a few days ago and they've been talking nonstop since then. Should I try to see what the conversation has been about? She knows it really bothers me but doesn't seem to care enough to stop.
#106140 - countrystrong (12/08/2013) [-]
You have to ignore your exes, but she can't ignore hers? That's not right. I've been in your situation before, and I let it go because I was too scared to say anything. I ended up getting cheated on about 3 times before I had enough and ended it. I think what you need to do is sit down with her (make her put her damn phone up) and just tell her how you really feel, no holding back. Whatever she says in response will determine whether she actually cares. If she doesn't seem into the conversation, then you'll know it's not right to be there. Especially after 9 months, which is pretty good considering how short relationships are anymore.
#106141 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
I have. She says she cares, she says that she understands why I'm upset. But she says that I'm being selfish because I'm not comfortable with her and one of her exes getting closer again. Then if I say then why can't I ever talk to mine? Or any of my girl friends that I've known since grade school? She says that its because she's scared that she'll lose me to someone better. So it seems like she really cares and is scared to lose me, but then right after we have the conversation her actions speak differently when she immediately texts the ex. Then the ex constantly drives by my house and hers. It's fucking irritating and I don't know how to handle it anymore. I don't want to end it because, fuck man, I've never had a girl make me happier, made me feel like such a good person, and we get along so well. Like even right now shes right next to me and we're having an awesome time. (She doesn't know about this obviously)
#106154 - letting (12/08/2013) [-]
"Then if I say then why can't I ever talk to mine? Or any of my girl friends that I've known since grade school? She says that its because she's scared that she'll lose me to someone better"
That seems manipulative in my opinion, not that she actually cares. There has to be equality in a relationship, and she doesn't seem to be getting that concept. I'm not saying start talking to all of your exs again, that would seem more like revenge than anything else.
It's a difficult line, trying not to seem controlling but at the same time she is not giving you the respect that you deserve, talking to other guys, having them as friends even, is totally fine under normal circumstances. If they have a long history together, and she's that desperate to talk to him all the time, seems very suspicious to me.
#106180 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
Exactly. I don't want to just wait on the sidelines while something might happen. I want her to be her own person, do what she wants, talk to who she wants, but at the same time I was to just take her phone out of her hands and say "listen, I'm tired of you and asshole talking, it's not happening anymore"
#106181 - letting (12/08/2013) [-]
That certainly wouldn't be the proper way of doing it, because it would instantly put her on the defensive. Perhaps she thinks she's doing nothing wrong, or perhaps she has other plans and feelings. Girls are tricky, I certainly don't know how the fuck they work, but this isn't something that you can just ignore.
You could try to guilt her out of it, kinda the pussy way out but the least controlling of the options. Just sit her down and tell her how much it bothers you, inquire why she feels she needs to spend so much time talking to this person, and give her an ultimatum, if she doesn't at the very least talk to this guy less, then she obviously doesn't care about your feelings enough for the relationship to survive.
#106221 - countrystrong (12/08/2013) [-]
I still think that if she won't let up and it's just stupid little conversations, then there really isn't any respect or equality on her part. Like letting said, that seems a little bit manipulative that she won't let you talk to any of your girl friends. I don't think it's at all good to remain in an untrusting, seemingly one-sided relationship. All it will do is cause you to worry. I'm a girl, and I've been on the other end of this where the guy did the same stuff. He ended up cheating on me at least 3 times before I gave it up. I thought I cared about him more than I actually did once I realized what was going on
#106243 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
I've decided that I'll talk to my friends when I want, as long as she's talking to any of those guys shes been talking to. If she gets mad I'll explain why and hopefully we can settle something. I trust her, I really do, but I don't trust the guys that talk to her.
#106143 - countrystrong (12/08/2013) [-]
Does she not think that you're scared you might lose her to that ex? And him driving by seems a little bit stalker-ish. You should be able to talk to any of your old girlfriends if she can talk to her ex all the time. And if she runs right to texting him after you talk, was her mind really on the conversation? Or was she just saying what you wanted to hear? That's the hardest thing to figure out. Is she texting him right now?
#106152 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
I don't know. At the moment there conversation consists of:
M h m
You're a weirdo
It's just stuff like that for days on end. No point. But she still wants to talk to him really bad. It's so annoying. I don't ever text other girls, especially around her, and even if I happen to text one it's for a real reason, not just conversation that doesn't even make sense.
#106158 - hawaiianhappysauce (12/08/2013) [-]
If you think you can beat the shit out of the ex, then approach him yourself and threaten him. If he starts an argument, kick his ass. If you don't think you can then I'm not sure what you can do, but the sick reality is that women like the dominant men. I have a theory that women fall mostly for the "reformed bad boy" because those men have a history of being bad and thus are capable of being bad, but are also in control of their bad boy side as opposed to unreformed ones who are unpredictable.
Seriously though, this is a risk of dating and a risk of putting your trust in someone else. If she cheats on you then that will only build a poor reputation for herself when it comes to other guys (I sure as hell wouldn't date someone who has a history of cheating). As for you, you obviously have characteristics that make you valuable to this particular woman, and therefore other women will pick up on that and find you valuable despite the fact that they don't know you that well. It's like "this girl thought he was good enough to date, maybe I should give him a try?"
#106179 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
This guy is literally the definition of a piece of shit. He is one of those guys who acts like he can kick anyones ass, think that he's a huge badass, drives a wannabe sports car and makes it loud (he has a fucking mitsubishi eclipse for gods sake), is a huge asshole and is just scum in general. He has turned the whole town against my girlfriend at one point and made her have no friends, then he shows one inkling of kindness or sensitivity and she completely forgives him. She did say she cheated on someone with him once but it was a misunderstanding. She said that she broke up with a guy, then the asshole kissed her as they were sleeping at a friends house (they were forced to share a bed and he was feeling her up the whole time as well, all a month before we started dating) and the boyfriend thought they were still together the next day. I highly doubt she'd cheat on me with him. And honestly, getting physical with him would make it worse, she did the same thing with a different ex and I threatened to kick his ass and she got mad and said I shouldn't get so violent towards her exes. It's fucked up.
#106182 - hawaiianhappysauce (12/08/2013) [-]
This girl is raising a ton of red flags. I can understand why you are paranoid. Not only did she just get out of a douchebag relationship, she already has a history of cheating. I always say, once a cheater, always a cheater. The first time you cheat is the hardest part, after that it gets easier and easier and easier. If she cheats on you then I guess it would be better now than years later when you get even closer (a friend of mine had that and she left him and it took him into some bad places, drugs).
#106183 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
She's been in a lot of douchebag relationships, yes. But she said that she told the guy that the relationship was over, then the asshole kissed her first. So in her mind she was single. And to make things more confusing, she claims I'm the most perfect guy ever, I've pushed her to go to college with me, got her a job, and even got her out of her depression she's had for 5 years, she's so much better with me because I've pushed her and had her do things she wouldn't normally do. But then she pulls shit like this and risks reverting back to the way things were before me, which honestly was fucking miserable for her.
#106186 - hawaiianhappysauce (12/08/2013) [-]
So what? Some women don't look ahead on decisions, they look at what's best for them immediately. That's why women usually cheat, then the boy finds out, then they regret it, then they move on. Same argument goes for men who have this mentality, the only difference is that men can't just have sex on the fly, whereas women can, so the regret is actually worse because there is a chance he wont have sex for awhile. Women can get sex much quicker than men unless she is obese, then she has to play the same game men have to play "convince me that you are a worthy relationship"
#106189 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
She has guys after her all the time, shes like an 8/10 so getting sex isn't hard for her at all. She's also been with like 7 guys sexually before me since she lost her virginity like almost 3 years ago. Only 2 did she love, and the rest were just kind of talking/slash friends. Or they just used her for sex. She was my first, and we had sex less then a week after we started dating, so I don't know how willing she is to cheat or have sex with someone else.
#106191 - hawaiianhappysauce (12/08/2013) [-]
Well congrats on the sex. I guess you can always look at it as a learning experience, getting through a painful breakup still is a learning experience. Having sex with an experienced partner is also a ton of experience and like I said before, other women would notice that you landed an 8/10 so they will see value in you, not sure if you watch a lot of TV but Senfeld explains this concept. But that's really all the advice I can give.
#106192 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
I guess I'll just keep doing what I'm doing and see what happens. I've done a lot for her and I'd do anything for her. So if she wants to ruin that by going to some douche whos only caused her pain then fine. That'll be her decision and I'll just have to learn from the situation. Thanks for the help.
#106138 - marinepenguin (12/08/2013) [-]
She gets super mad and jealous if another girl so much as looks at me. And when my ex has texted me on multiple occasions it really really bothered her so I just ignored them, I kind of wanted to talk to her (closure reasons) but I respected her feelings. She's done this before with the guy who took her virginity and was her first everything, but she said that she "can't ignore him", because then "she'd be doing to him what he did to her" (they still talk every now and then). I'm just tired of feeling shitty about guys talking to her, her almost ignoring how I feel (she just says I need to not let it bother me, and that's not possible), and feeling like that bad guy by stating how I feel. I try to tough it out and act like it doesn't bother me, but it really does.
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|#122 - It's not, no. I've always been scared of the risks, but I'm cu…||12/04/2013 on I'm so strong||+2|
|#120 - Just becuase you are in a relationship doesn't mean it's a goo… [+] (3 new replies)||12/04/2013 on I'm so strong||+1|
#132 - adu (12/04/2013) [-]
Well, that's not what I'm saying at all. A mutual love and understanding between two people is one of the most beautiful things you can find in this life, I truly believe that. I was just pointing out the fact that being single is STILL better than being in a shitty relationship (not all relationships are shitty). Yeah all of them have ups and downs, but if you're being manipulated by a significant other or are abused or neglected emotionally, then sometimes it's better without them, you know?
#122 - marinepenguin (12/04/2013) [-]
It's not, no. I've always been scared of the risks, but I'm currently in a relationships that's been going for almost 9 months. I've never been happier.
Just like anything else in life, there's a chance for success or failure, you just have to take risks and learn from your mistakes. Leading a life where you refuse to risk anything is leading a life full of regret.
|#70 - The thing is, most girls that I've seen in that situation don'…||12/04/2013 on Everytime I Try to Talk to...||0|
|#41 - At first I wondered how he did that while driving, then I real…||12/04/2013 on "Merry"||0|
|#234 - If you were elected I'd move to Canada.||12/03/2013 on Me in a nutshell||+1|
|#90 - I'm touching myself right now. [+] (1 new reply)||12/03/2013 on friendship is magic||0|
|#137 - I like to think that the longer the line was to get to the bin…||12/03/2013 on happiest day of their lives||0|
|#66 - Picture||12/02/2013 on marinepenguin's profile||0|
|#100516 - Be outgoing and hilarious.||12/02/2013 on Social Board||0|
|#105271 - Then the answer is pretty simple. Tell her she isn't invited n… [+] (1 new reply)||12/02/2013 on Advice - love advice,...||+1|
|#105268 - Well obviously she wants to talk to you or have some sort of r…||12/02/2013 on Advice - love advice,...||0|
|#105267 - Ah.. So the annoying attention whore, I know that species. … [+] (3 new replies)||12/02/2013 on Advice - love advice,...||+1|
|#105263 - Why'd she get you a present if you and everyone hates her? [+] (5 new replies)||12/02/2013 on Advice - love advice,...||+1|
#105267 - marinepenguin (12/02/2013) [-]
Ah.. So the annoying attention whore, I know that species.
I'd say that if I were you, get everyone together and try to get them to just kind of tolerate her for the party. She did get you a present, and it's only been 2 days so she could redeem herself in some way. So unless she's gonna do something to make the party incredibly awkward or ruin it, I'd just let her come and then not even involve her in anything after.
|#47002 - I mean, I can kind of see where he's coming from. But, there a…||12/01/2013 on Religion Board||0|
|#52786 - That was just the first link that I looked up on google. I loo… [+] (2 new replies)||11/30/2013 on Politics - politics news,...||0|
|#105080 - Trust me, I know how you feel. But there are a lot of girls ou… [+] (1 new reply)||11/30/2013 on Advice - love advice,...||0|
#105082 - 2scared2login (11/30/2013) [-]
Ok, thanks for the advice!