Click to expand
Level 217 Comments: Comedic Genius
OfflineSend mail to lyestcer Block lyestcer Invite lyestcer to be your friend flag avatar
|Last status update:|| |
|Date Signed Up:||1/13/2012|
|Funnyjunk Career Stats|
|Content Thumbs:||335 total, 425 , 90|
|Comment Thumbs:||1763 total, 1889 , 126|
|Content Level Progress:|| 30% (3/10) |
Level 28 Content: Peasant → Level 29 Content: Peasant
|Comment Level Progress:|| 34% (34/100) |
Level 217 Comments: Comedic Genius → Level 218 Comments: Comedic Genius
|Times Content Favorited:||4 times|
|Total Comments Made:||274|
latest user's comments
|#3 - Picture||09/14/2014 on Constipation||+2|
|#101 - Haha, its not my story. But I am a medicine student,…||08/31/2014 on Is it friday?||+1|
|#19 - Now, I worked for a flower shop growing up. I've been to funer… [+] (6 new replies)||08/30/2014 on Is it friday?||+5|
#37 - crazylance (08/30/2014) [-]
|#18 - I bring to you this monstrosity, from a poor nursing student o… [+] (8 new replies)||08/30/2014 on Is it friday?||+5|
#19 - lyestcer (08/30/2014) [-]
Her inner thighs and the opening of her vagina were weeping this blackish-brown, thick, fluid. My classmates on either side of her promptly started gagging into their masks. The tech started screaming for me to run and get the peppermint oil. I dove across the theatre for the bottle, ran back, and drenched all our masks in the oil. Once we could all breathe again the tech told me to run for the doctor, that this was an emergency.
Ooook. I still have no idea what's going on. I can't see past the mountains of fat and the tech, but I do as I'm told. When I finally return with the doctor, my fellow nursing students were all huddled in the corner with the tech, who looked like she had aged 20 years in the 10 minutes it took me to come back with the doctor.
The doctor walked over and started asking the tech what the hell was going on. Keep in mind this fat tub of lard is still in the background screeching about how she wants to get down, and she's hungry, and when are we letting her go home. Somehow, somewhere this woman had found a man desperate enough to fuck her.
The mass in her abdomen? Was the remnants of a placenta. Her body had started rejecting the pregnancy, but because she was so overweight, she never knew she was pregnant, and never realized she was miscarrying. The baby had begun rotting inside her vaginal cavity and the placenta was just floating detached in her uterus.
They had to take her in for emergency surgery, scrape the remnants of the baby and the placenta out of her body and put her on iv antibiotics. I know she spent at least a week in the hospital. Past that I don't want to know and pray I never find out.
She dropped out of nursing school after that.
#37 - crazylance (08/30/2014) [-]
|#66 - lol||08/27/2014 on Anon is at the Amusement Park||+1|
|#36 - Why cant we just enjoy the handsome faces of Squidward and Zah…||08/23/2014 on Was reminded of this||0|
|#38 - Gonna be honest, when I read the first two, I thought this was…||08/14/2014 on 9 amazing natural phenomenons||+2|
|#3414 - **lyestcer rolls 4,760,928**||08/04/2014 on Roll for Green Text||0|
|#68 - I know what you mean, I knew one of the families on that plane…||07/22/2014 on The Peacekeeper||+1|
|#2475 - **lyestcer rolls 146,426,218** Happy birthday!||07/10/2014 on Free Steam Card||0|