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krasnogvardiech

Last status update:
Got my new multitool. Leatherman OHT. Already cut myself on it by accident.comment
Personal Info
Gender: male
Consoles Owned: PC, PS2, Xbox 360.
Video Games Played: Too fucking many
X-box Gamertag: see profile name, capitalize fir
Interests: numerous
Date Signed Up:8/30/2012
Location:New Zealand
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Ranking:#2685
Comment Ranking:#534
Highest Content Rank:#433
Highest Comment Rank:#111
Content Thumbs: 13904 total,  15828 ,  1924
Comment Thumbs: 55539 total,  59953 ,  4414
Content Level Progress: 9.2% (46/500)
Level 211 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 212 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 84.1% (841/1000)
Level 347 Comments: Sold Soul → Level 348 Comments: Sold Soul
Subscribers:12
Content Views:863380
Times Content Favorited:1891 times
Total Comments Made:15159
FJ Points:19987
Favorite Tags: the (10) | warhammer (9) | of (7) | Not (6) | OC (6) | it (5) | to (5) | 40k (4) | emperor (4) | for (4) | a (3) | do (3) | gaming (3) | God (3) | in (3) | Life (3) | man (3) | You (3) | 4Chan (2) | and (2)
I agree, keeping with logic and common sense is normally a priority. The hills have eyes, y'know?
On the other hand, there is a point where reason is to be thrown to the curb. We have gone past that point and that is why I am here.

latest user's comments

#62 - Careful not to be too cormy there.  [+] (1 new reply) 05/22/2015 on Photoshop gold 0
#90 - anonymous (05/22/2015) [-]
why the fuck uses that word 'corny'
#112 - 'merica  [+] (1 new reply) 05/22/2015 on Clouds That Actually Look... +1
#133 - ryix (05/22/2015) [-]
F*ck yeah
#111 - I see a dude with a greatsword charging. Possibly sho…  [+] (2 new replies) 05/22/2015 on Clouds That Actually Look... +2
User avatar #132 - moldybreadcrumb (05/22/2015) [-]
I see a turtle with a greatsword charging
User avatar #113 - nexuslament (05/22/2015) [-]
it doesn't have a definitive name so its open to perspective.
#50 - Picture  [+] (4 new replies) 05/22/2015 on Photoshop gold +4
#51 - cormy (05/22/2015) [-]
WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!
FOOLS! YOU'VE MESSED WITH THE NATURAL ORDER!
#64 - ventusvsroxas (05/22/2015) [-]
let me fix that for you
User avatar #62 - krasnogvardiech (05/22/2015) [-]
Careful not to be too cormy there.
#90 - anonymous (05/22/2015) [-]
why the fuck uses that word 'corny'
#38 - das gay man 05/22/2015 on inner balance 0
#124 - I'm a worker, not a fighter. If I was with you mad bastards, w…  [+] (3 new replies) 05/22/2015 on Q&A ARENA -1
User avatar #156 - arena (05/22/2015) [-]
Yea. OBVIOUSLY .
#174 - krasnogvardiech (05/22/2015) [-]
#r00d

fo real man id str8 preci8
User avatar #175 - arena (05/22/2015) [-]
I'll give you a mention in the next upload
#5 - DUTY is the right way forward! DUTY is the one holding the… 05/22/2015 on Freedom 0
#13 - Why do the shower nozzles at Auschwitz have only nine holes? … 05/21/2015 on Poor choice of words israel +3
#3 - Picture 05/21/2015 on I’m just big-boned. +18
#10 - Picture  [+] (2 new replies) 05/21/2015 on WH40k +31
User avatar #27 - warzon (05/21/2015) [-]
*BOOM, guy's head explodes, off to the storm planet to become a pysker*
#15 - solidderking (05/21/2015) [-]
Fucking Psykers, trying to kill you with their mind and shit
#159 - Never too late to start. 05/21/2015 on Obesity +1
#10 - Squats and Oats, bruh. 05/21/2015 on inner balance +3
#72 - Absolutely fantastic. It's been one hell of a ride, arena! 05/21/2015 on The reign of King Fedora... 0
#130 - Sigmar. The God-Emperor in WHFB, the great-grandaddy of 40k. 05/21/2015 on 41st millennium humor 0
#12 - Taken half a year ago. He's up to my thigh now. 05/20/2015 on Doge 13 +1
#589 - Picture 05/20/2015 on GIF contest +3
#19 - yo homie gets a gf she clingy af 05/20/2015 on I had a bro friend 0
#10 - The new artwork for Tengen Toppa Gurenn Lagann looks pretty go… 05/20/2015 on get off yer high horse 0
#21 - jingleforth has more determination than a shounen hero. 05/20/2015 on Here ya go kiddo! +28
#10 - Cthulholohohulahilolahohoochoowewhonololu. It's not … 05/20/2015 on Curse 0
#93 - IT IS YOU! THE HERO OF KVATCH! 05/20/2015 on Hey FJ +3
#37 - And a nat 20 on top of that. 05/20/2015 on windows to the universe 0
#133 - A more useful question is "What the **** is right … 05/20/2015 on Okay, Fj.... Do your thing 0
#85 - Tryndamere on a day off. ashedust, can you confirm?  [+] (1 new reply) 05/20/2015 on Meanwhile... in the woods +2
#107 - ashedust (05/20/2015) [-]
"Tryndamere visit's Ashe"
#1 - Not inaccurate. Like furfags, it'll pass. 05/20/2015 on pol 0

items

Total unique items point value: 170 / Total items point value: 790

Comments(2337):

krasnogvardiech has disabled anonymous comments.
[ 2337 comments ]
#2354 - falloutsurvivor (11 hours ago) [-]
**falloutsurvivor buys Kras a russian havoc copter**
User avatar #2355 to #2354 - krasnogvardiech (11 hours ago) [-]
ffs kurze

i need to sleep

stop tempting me from it
#2356 to #2355 - falloutsurvivor (11 hours ago) [-]
wtf its only 10pm
you lazy blob
User avatar #2357 to #2356 - krasnogvardiech (11 hours ago) [-]
I need to get up for work tomorrow tho

and my alarms fail to wake me.
#2358 to #2357 - falloutsurvivor (11 hours ago) [-]
lazy bear does not wake easily
#2353 - rageblade (05/23/2015) [-]
i think we need to post fake porn of kras out in the fields with the sheep
#2351 - falloutsurvivor (05/22/2015) [-]
*sniffs*
i smell borscht
kras must have logged in
User avatar #2352 to #2351 - krasnogvardiech (05/23/2015) [-]
Playing Hellgate London. Wazup?
#2350 - rageblade (05/21/2015) [-]
that moment when kras met admin
https://youtube.com/devicesupport
#2347 - falloutsurvivor (05/16/2015) [-]
**falloutsurvivor used "*roll cah answer*"**
**falloutsurvivor rolls Flash flooding.**
what kinda tv show should we put kras in
#2349 to #2347 - falloutsurvivor (05/16/2015) [-]
great
kras brings his rasputitsa to new zealand
User avatar #2348 to #2347 - krasnogvardiech (05/16/2015) [-]
Nice, surfing.
#2341 - rageblade (05/15/2015) [-]
**rageblade used "*roll cah answer*"**
**rageblade rolls Hot Pockets©.**
what kind of girlfriend does kras need
#2343 to #2342 - rageblade (05/15/2015) [-]
what\you dont want a girl who will bring you food randomly through the day
User avatar #2344 to #2343 - krasnogvardiech (05/15/2015) [-]
That will interfere with my bringing her food randomly through the day though.
#2345 to #2344 - rageblade (05/15/2015) [-]
*prods Kras belly*
you'll feed each other to death
User avatar #2346 to #2345 - krasnogvardiech (05/16/2015) [-]
So romantic.
#2340 - rageblade (05/15/2015) [-]
> play rust
> walk near bear
> bear charges

goddam even in pc games, russians are edgy
#2339 - falloutsurvivor (05/13/2015) [-]
*pokes kras with a stick*
#2337 - falloutsurvivor (05/12/2015) [-]
Kras
stop buying alcohol and buy better internet
User avatar #2338 to #2337 - krasnogvardiech (05/12/2015) [-]
Maybe on Wednesday.
#2334 - rageblade (05/11/2015) [-]
Krassie
come join me in Rust

surely a little soviet farmer would like building his own house, hunting animals for food, and living off the land
User avatar #2335 to #2334 - krasnogvardiech (05/11/2015) [-]
Sounds fukken nice, but it's an internet game. Thus, I can't play it. Connection 2 **** .
#2336 to #2335 - rageblade (05/12/2015) [-]
its called buy a better internet provider
#2333 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
*jumps onto Kras' back*
onwards noble steed

URAAAAAAAA
#2332 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
and thats how Kras gets the girls

#2315 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
I am heavy weapons Krasnogvardiech
and this is maya malushka
User avatar #2316 to #2315 - krasnogvardiech (05/09/2015) [-]
Not enough bear hands in employ. You need to kill a bear and take its hands with your bare hands for them to be bear hands.
#2319 to #2318 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
not true

you dont have right to whole bear

motherland IS whole bear
#2321 to #2320 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
....then theres your country ukraine

#2322 to #2321 - krasnogvardiech (05/09/2015) [-]
Such is life in the zone.
#2323 to #2322 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
STALKER

Soviet Tragedy Always Leaves Kras Eating Rubbish
#2324 to #2323 - krasnogvardiech (05/09/2015) [-]
Food is rubbish, but we make do.
#2325 to #2324 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
but remember

at least you aint american

half their food is synthetic
#2326 to #2325 - krasnogvardiech (05/09/2015) [-]
не моя проблема
#2327 to #2326 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
yeah in new zealand
food is okay.....the water is ****
#2328 to #2327 - krasnogvardiech (05/09/2015) [-]
Only in big cities.

Go to Queenstown or another mountain-lake city. Water is ******* purest **** ever.
#2329 to #2328 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
dont they fluoridate all water in new zealand

aka **** in it
User avatar #2330 to #2329 - krasnogvardiech (05/09/2015) [-]
Yep. But to be fair, that's only past all the farms, factories, meat processing plants, chemical plants... you see what I mean?

Mountain water is drinkable straight from the lake, even if ducks and fish **** in it.

Mountain water fresh from completely pure lakes? Bruh come on the refractory period ain't even over yet.
#2331 to #2330 - falloutsurvivor (05/09/2015) [-]
where do you live
#2312 - falloutsurvivor (05/08/2015) [-]
*puts Kras in a meat grinder and makes bear pie*
User avatar #2313 to #2312 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
But then how will I ******** ?
#2314 to #2313 - falloutsurvivor (05/08/2015) [-]
idk but i think a kras bear / vodka / borscht pie might make me **** myself

so theres some ****
#2282 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
for mother russia
for mother russia
#2303 to #2282 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
/tg/ don't give a single **** about hating anything outside the various editions of 40k. Here's a taster.
#2304 to #2303 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
i will give it a try. but later.

play with me
User avatar #2305 to #2304 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Link to game?

They're various stories I collected over the years. To hell with it, I'll put it up as content.
User avatar #2306 to #2305 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
agar.io/


lets play with russian server
User avatar #2307 to #2306 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Fukken sweet. ******** as it may be, tho, I have to head out for the night.

Goodbye, Stalker.
User avatar #2309 to #2307 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
or morning
User avatar #2308 to #2307 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
good night
#2283 to #2282 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
You know it. remove ******** tho

#2284 to #2283 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
russians are weebs by themselves

what are you defect thing or something?
#2285 to #2284 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Nyet

just not a serf
User avatar #2286 to #2285 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
***** WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN NZ?
User avatar #2287 to #2286 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Chillin'. ****** nice down here.
User avatar #2288 to #2287 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
you leave near konrad?
User avatar #2289 to #2288 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Not far if you count an ocean and nearly the entire length of the country as pretty close .

So in short, nah mate.
#2290 to #2289 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
>TFW NZ kiwi fruit
#2291 to #2290 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Gotta admit, it's pretty good.
User avatar #2292 to #2291 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
indeed.

unlike the Italian kiwis they suck!
#2293 to #2292 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Why? I've not had them so I have to ask.
User avatar #2294 to #2293 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
can we have kiwis as pets
User avatar #2295 to #2294 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Considering they're nocturnal, finicky as hell about their habitation, legally impossible to get a hold of and have their eggs eaten by ******* possums, I'd say no.

Doable, but not feasible. Why, you like 'em?
User avatar #2296 to #2295 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
they look adorable

i once had a chicken as a pet but then we feasted on it.
User avatar #2297 to #2296 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
They're tiny. Those leaves in the above picture are as big as your hand from base of palm to fingertip.
User avatar #2298 to #2297 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
well. i dont think they can handle this ****** weather in kuwait
User avatar #2299 to #2298 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Dense forests are where they're best. Free of night-time land predators.
User avatar #2300 to #2299 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
>brings kiwis to kuwait
>kiwis evaporates
User avatar #2301 to #2300 - krasnogvardiech (05/08/2015) [-]
Lel, prolly.

Are you by chance a fan of /tg/ stories? My collection is... extensive.
User avatar #2302 to #2301 - syrianassassinsoul (05/08/2015) [-]
nien

i dont go to hate chans much.
#2281 - rageblade (05/08/2015) [-]
dance kras
DANCE

https://youtube.com/devicesupport
#2278 - falloutsurvivor (05/07/2015) [-]
we must make Kras bear a new character with the wolf and rabbit on Nu Pagodi
#2279 to #2278 - krasnogvardiech (05/07/2015) [-]
Ah, Nu Pogodi. A good portion of my childhood there.
#2280 to #2279 - falloutsurvivor (05/07/2015) [-]
so rabbit-wolf-bear

new show with kras the drunk bear
#2275 - mcburd (05/06/2015) [-]
So I hear you remove kebabs.....
#2310 to #2275 - kebabs (05/08/2015) [-]
***** ur a bird u cant even remove the leftover **** from your feathers
User avatar #2311 to #2310 - mcburd (05/08/2015) [-]
Oh jeez, sorry kebables
#2277 to #2275 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
I occasionally remove kebab, yes.
#2238 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
*prods Kras' flabby russian belly*
#2240 to #2239 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
**falloutsurvivor used "*roll Magic 8-Ball*"**
**falloutsurvivor rolls My reply is no**
does kras give a ****
User avatar #2241 to #2240 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
It's why I am immune to *********** .

I like the company.
#2242 to #2241 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
i thought you were immune to *********** becuase soviet life bred emotions out of you
#2243 to #2242 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
The opposite, tovarisch.

Life in the Zone is harsh. But with what little company and goodness you can find, you must enjoy it to the fullest, for you do not know what day may be your last.

Harsh times breed strong people, but those who are weak outside such times. They do not know what to do.

In harsh times interspersed with easy times, the person will squander their works to have momentary relief from the pain. It, then, is best to have easy times interspersed with harshness so that the individual can learn to adapt, and learn to change things for the better.
#2244 to #2243 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
**falloutsurvivor used "*roll cah answer*"**
**falloutsurvivor rolls Lesbian schoolgirls.**
whats Kras most used emotion
#2246 to #2244 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
I won't lie and disagree.
#2247 to #2246 - falloutsurvivor has deleted their comment [-]
#2249 to #2248 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
**falloutsurvivor used "*roll picture*"**
**falloutsurvivor rolled image** how about this
User avatar #2250 to #2249 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
The bird of freedom is an attractive woman, but just not the type for me. Considering she claims to be a free spirit, she certainly forces others to act the same way as her.
#2251 to #2250 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
**falloutsurvivor used "*roll cah answer*"**
**falloutsurvivor rolls Estrogen.** what is Kras symbolic bird
#2253 to #2251 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
estrogen - female

most popular female bird is McBurd
#2254 to #2252 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
Kras shall worship MCBURD!!!!!
User avatar #2255 to #2254 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
A lot of people do. The temples are flattering, I would guess, but embarassing.

I look over the dashboard of my kitchen and wave with a grizzly smile as she leaves the house in the morning.
#2256 to #2255 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
**falloutsurvivor used "*roll picture*"**
**falloutsurvivor rolled image**
McBurd acts like a crow and steals this for Kras
User avatar #2274 to #2256 - mcburd (05/06/2015) [-]
What?
User avatar #2258 to #2256 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
Steal me a pretty woman? Nice.
#2259 to #2258 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
but....but....mcburd is a pretty girl
#2276 to #2273 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
*hugs burdy* its true
User avatar #2260 to #2259 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
She's also a cockatiel. I could crush her with my bear hand.
User avatar #2272 to #2260 - mcburd (05/06/2015) [-]
I dont even want to fight.
#2261 to #2260 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
youre kinda underestimating her

she has knives and tanks
#2257 to #2256 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
McBurd steals candy for kras
#2262 to #2257 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
Mcburd may have knives and tanks, but I have a RED ARMY!
#2271 to #2262 - mcburd (05/06/2015) [-]
Ok well maybe the tank
#2269 to #2262 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
i need to nest myself....

sleep well krasbear
#2267 to #2262 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
pffft
russian women would welcome burdies females and unite against kras men
User avatar #2268 to #2267 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
So, average life in the motherland.

I need to hibernate. See you on the other side
#2265 to #2262 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
mcburd has arab friends

they will blow up your tanks
User avatar #2270 to #2265 - mcburd (05/06/2015) [-]
I do not.
#2266 to #2265 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
go ahead

ladies in the army love target practice.
#2263 to #2262 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
you never saw that old movie 'the birds' did you

in the end the birds won remember.....
#2264 to #2263 - krasnogvardiech (05/06/2015) [-]
They didn't have many of these puppies.
#2245 to #2244 - falloutsurvivor (05/06/2015) [-]
krasnogvardiech confirmed mostly horny
[ 2337 comments ]
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