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krasnogvardiech    

Rank #142 on Comments
krasnogvardiech Avatar Level 336 Comments: Practically Famous
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Consoles Owned: Xbox 360
Video Games Played: Mass Effect (series), Halo 4, Metro: Last Light, Farcry 3, Deadpool: the game, Borderlands 2, Singularity, Darksiders 2, probably other ones that I've forgot right about now.
X-box Gamertag: Krasnogvardiech
Interests: Warhammer 40k, Aviation, Mechanical engineering, Physics, Writing fiction, Firearms, Automobiles, Aircraft, Gaming, Reading, various other things.
Date Signed Up:8/30/2012
Location:New Zealand
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Ranking:#3781
Comment Ranking:#142
Highest Content Rank:#433
Highest Comment Rank:#113
Content Thumbs: 13124 total,  14933 ,  1809
Comment Thumbs: 40861 total,  44487 ,  3626
Content Level Progress: 51% (51/100)
Level 209 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 210 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 80.1% (801/1000)
Level 336 Comments: Practically Famous → Level 337 Comments: Practically Famous
Subscribers:9
Content Views:804827
Times Content Favorited:1620 times
Total Comments Made:11712
FJ Points:8202
Favorite Tags: warhammer (9) | the (8) | Not (6) | OC (6) | of (6) | to (5) | 40k (3) | a (3) | emperor (3) | for (3) | gaming (3) | it (3) | Life (3) | 4Chan (2) | bat (2) | creed (2) | Deviantart (2) | do (2) | dorfs (2) | elves (2)
I'm fucked in the head. That's about all there is to say.

latest user's comments

#112 - True. Oh well, that's about it for me. Ave Imperator, tovarisch.  [+] (2 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
User avatar #113 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Aye... and that's it on my end of things. Gonna hit the hay soon and dwell on this.
User avatar #114 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
And thanks for sharing all this!
#14 - Picture  [+] (5 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Dog thoughts 0
User avatar #15 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Try it and see what happens!
#16 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #17 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Talk about epilepsy.
#18 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #19 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I always hated that class.
#12 - Picture  [+] (7 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Dog thoughts 0
User avatar #13 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Bring it mate!
#14 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #15 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Try it and see what happens!
#16 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #17 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Talk about epilepsy.
#18 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #19 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I always hated that class.
#108 - It's been around since the 80's. Yes, that Ork's head…  [+] (4 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
User avatar #109 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Hey, if you gotta look badass, you might as well do it in style, right?
User avatar #112 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
True. Oh well, that's about it for me. Ave Imperator, tovarisch.
User avatar #113 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Aye... and that's it on my end of things. Gonna hit the hay soon and dwell on this.
User avatar #114 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
And thanks for sharing all this!
#10 - Picture  [+] (9 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Dog thoughts 0
User avatar #11 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Now that is not very nice.
#12 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #13 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Bring it mate!
#14 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #15 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Try it and see what happens!
#16 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #17 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Talk about epilepsy.
#18 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #19 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I always hated that class.
#8 - Picture  [+] (11 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Dog thoughts 0
User avatar #9 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
You wish buddy.
#10 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #11 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Now that is not very nice.
#12 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #13 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Bring it mate!
#14 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #15 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Try it and see what happens!
#16 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #17 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Talk about epilepsy.
#18 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #19 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I always hated that class.
#6 - Picture  [+] (13 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Dog thoughts 0
User avatar #7 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I will take that whiskey whether you like it or not.
#8 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #9 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
You wish buddy.
#10 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #11 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Now that is not very nice.
#12 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #13 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Bring it mate!
#14 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #15 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Try it and see what happens!
#16 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #17 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Talk about epilepsy.
#18 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #19 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I always hated that class.
#4 - **krasnogvardiech rolled user tallzed ** Do it. I…  [+] (15 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Dog thoughts 0
User avatar #5 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Wrong person.
#6 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #7 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I will take that whiskey whether you like it or not.
#8 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #9 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
You wish buddy.
#10 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #11 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Now that is not very nice.
#12 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #13 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Bring it mate!
#14 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #15 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Try it and see what happens!
#16 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #17 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Talk about epilepsy.
#18 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #19 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I always hated that class.
#105 - It wouldn't weight a ton at all! I'm just giving you the abrid…  [+] (6 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
User avatar #107 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Damn... I was always vaguely aware warhammer was popular... but I didn't know it was this popular.
#108 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It's been around since the 80's.

Yes, that Ork's head is being used as a hand grenade.
User avatar #109 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Hey, if you gotta look badass, you might as well do it in style, right?
User avatar #112 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
True. Oh well, that's about it for me. Ave Imperator, tovarisch.
User avatar #113 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Aye... and that's it on my end of things. Gonna hit the hay soon and dwell on this.
User avatar #114 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
And thanks for sharing all this!
#5 - Picture  [+] (1 new reply) 10/16/2014 on ink +4
#38 - xuixer (10/16/2014) [-]
Here, take this
#2 - **krasnogvardiech rolled user sinconn **  [+] (17 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Dog thoughts +1
User avatar #3 - sinconn (10/16/2014) [-]
If you roll me again, I'll make sure you no longer have the capability to do so again.. permanently.
User avatar #4 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
**krasnogvardiech rolled user tallzed **

Do it. I dare you.
User avatar #5 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Wrong person.
#6 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #7 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I will take that whiskey whether you like it or not.
#8 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #9 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
You wish buddy.
#10 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #11 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Now that is not very nice.
#12 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #13 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Bring it mate!
#14 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #15 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Try it and see what happens!
#16 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #17 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
Talk about epilepsy.
#18 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
User avatar #19 - tallzed (10/16/2014) [-]
I always hated that class.
#25 - I'm almost there. 10/16/2014 on Muricafag here with a... 0
#100 - And that's that. Any questions?  [+] (9 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
User avatar #104 - arkanios (10/16/2014) [-]
I have one: Can you also describe the different types of soldiers of the Imperial military? Like the Guardsmen, the Kriegs Who look the coolest to me, mainly because of the gasmasks and german soldier style , techpriests if they count, I'm not too familiar on Warhammer myself and I only know what I've read from FJ and any others?
User avatar #103 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Whelp... I believe you that it would weigh a ton to compile all this info.

So basically, everyone hates eachother. The humans are the babies of the universe and the necrontyr are the murderous and surprisingly spry grandpas of the universe. Orks are the barbarians. Elves are the pompous fucks who do whatever. Chaos is the grand evil which has a ever present presence cause everything is always in chaos. and the Tau are trying to establish a foothold in the universe by means of superiority.

Did I miss anything?
User avatar #105 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It wouldn't weight a ton at all! I'm just giving you the abridged version.

All in all though, that summary is pretty much that. There's even more to it - even a collection of series of novels where Black Library, GW's printing front, officially publishes works by the various authors.

Also, quite a few videogames.
User avatar #107 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Damn... I was always vaguely aware warhammer was popular... but I didn't know it was this popular.
#108 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It's been around since the 80's.

Yes, that Ork's head is being used as a hand grenade.
User avatar #109 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Hey, if you gotta look badass, you might as well do it in style, right?
User avatar #112 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
True. Oh well, that's about it for me. Ave Imperator, tovarisch.
User avatar #113 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Aye... and that's it on my end of things. Gonna hit the hay soon and dwell on this.
User avatar #114 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
And thanks for sharing all this!
#99 - Tyranids, Orks and the two kinds of Eldar are covered. …  [+] (10 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
User avatar #100 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
And that's that. Any questions?
User avatar #104 - arkanios (10/16/2014) [-]
I have one: Can you also describe the different types of soldiers of the Imperial military? Like the Guardsmen, the Kriegs Who look the coolest to me, mainly because of the gasmasks and german soldier style , techpriests if they count, I'm not too familiar on Warhammer myself and I only know what I've read from FJ and any others?
User avatar #103 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Whelp... I believe you that it would weigh a ton to compile all this info.

So basically, everyone hates eachother. The humans are the babies of the universe and the necrontyr are the murderous and surprisingly spry grandpas of the universe. Orks are the barbarians. Elves are the pompous fucks who do whatever. Chaos is the grand evil which has a ever present presence cause everything is always in chaos. and the Tau are trying to establish a foothold in the universe by means of superiority.

Did I miss anything?
User avatar #105 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It wouldn't weight a ton at all! I'm just giving you the abridged version.

All in all though, that summary is pretty much that. There's even more to it - even a collection of series of novels where Black Library, GW's printing front, officially publishes works by the various authors.

Also, quite a few videogames.
User avatar #107 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Damn... I was always vaguely aware warhammer was popular... but I didn't know it was this popular.
#108 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It's been around since the 80's.

Yes, that Ork's head is being used as a hand grenade.
User avatar #109 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Hey, if you gotta look badass, you might as well do it in style, right?
User avatar #112 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
True. Oh well, that's about it for me. Ave Imperator, tovarisch.
User avatar #113 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Aye... and that's it on my end of things. Gonna hit the hay soon and dwell on this.
User avatar #114 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
And thanks for sharing all this!
#97 - Next are the Xenos factions - or aliens, to put it simply. …  [+] (11 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
#99 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
Tyranids, Orks and the two kinds of Eldar are covered.

The Necrontyr are a race of beings that were caged in bodies of necrodermis and had their souls sucked away from them by physical god-like insensate masses of sentient energy formed at the moment of creation named the C'tan. Their technology is literal aeons old, and thus far is still greatly in excess of Imperial tech. Their goal is the destruction of all sentient life to feed their C'tan masters, and for this reason the Tyranids avoid them like the plague - primarily because the Necrontyr do not have any biomass to consume.

Next and last is the Tau. They are a newly-risen-to-power faction of aliens which have nearly no presence in the Warp and have comparitively to the Imperium, somewhat advanced technology, consisting of plasma rifles and battle suits galore. They take after IRL communist values rather well, wanting to indoctrinate all of them for their Greater Good. They are slowly expanding through space near the borders of the Imperial pseudo-empire of Ultramar, and probably will get their shit pushed in at some point.
User avatar #100 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
And that's that. Any questions?
User avatar #104 - arkanios (10/16/2014) [-]
I have one: Can you also describe the different types of soldiers of the Imperial military? Like the Guardsmen, the Kriegs Who look the coolest to me, mainly because of the gasmasks and german soldier style , techpriests if they count, I'm not too familiar on Warhammer myself and I only know what I've read from FJ and any others?
User avatar #103 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Whelp... I believe you that it would weigh a ton to compile all this info.

So basically, everyone hates eachother. The humans are the babies of the universe and the necrontyr are the murderous and surprisingly spry grandpas of the universe. Orks are the barbarians. Elves are the pompous fucks who do whatever. Chaos is the grand evil which has a ever present presence cause everything is always in chaos. and the Tau are trying to establish a foothold in the universe by means of superiority.

Did I miss anything?
User avatar #105 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It wouldn't weight a ton at all! I'm just giving you the abridged version.

All in all though, that summary is pretty much that. There's even more to it - even a collection of series of novels where Black Library, GW's printing front, officially publishes works by the various authors.

Also, quite a few videogames.
User avatar #107 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Damn... I was always vaguely aware warhammer was popular... but I didn't know it was this popular.
#108 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It's been around since the 80's.

Yes, that Ork's head is being used as a hand grenade.
User avatar #109 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Hey, if you gotta look badass, you might as well do it in style, right?
User avatar #112 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
True. Oh well, that's about it for me. Ave Imperator, tovarisch.
User avatar #113 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Aye... and that's it on my end of things. Gonna hit the hay soon and dwell on this.
User avatar #114 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
And thanks for sharing all this!
#94 - Forgot a suitable picture for Chaos. 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
#90 - Up next is the single largest threat to the Imperium and to th…  [+] (12 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +2
#97 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
Next are the Xenos factions - or aliens, to put it simply.
In the eyes of the Imperium, what is not human and unwilling to serve the Emperor is to be dealt a swift death. Considering what lies in wait to prey on the Imperium, that is a fairly reasonable notion.
And all of these listed factions are at war with each other as much as they are with Chaos and the Imperium. Unlike those two, they are not unified.
The greatest xenos threat enroaching are the Tyranids, as pictured in this image. A race swarming in from beyond the stars in fleets of numbers too great to count, they are swooping down to consume the Imperium for its biomass, to add to its numbers where the Tyranid Swarm will move on to the next galaxy upon the devouring of all biomass.
Arguably the second greatest threat in numbers if not in outright volatility is the greenskin menace, the Orks. To put it lightly, they are an infestation of idiotic, psychic green-hued spacefaring barbarians who reproduce by spores and have technology that by all rights should not work, and yet due to a gesalt psychic field they exude, they can alter reality about them as they see fit. Orks being Orks, they use it to make the belief that 'Red wunz go fasta!' is actually fact. And thus, a red-painted Orky trukk will indeed go faster than a yellow-painted one. All of their technology is as such - if they believe it works, it works. They also get bigger and stronger the more they live and fight and enjoy themselves.
The next are the Eldar - a race of what is essentially space elves, both major kinds of which have technology, longevity and psyker resistance far in excess of humankind. One version live in planet-sized ships and travel about the galaxy predicting future events and altering them to their own fitting, while the other live in a city lodged inside another dimension, acting as murderous nymphomaniac pirates, enslaving and generally torturing whatever they please to try prolong their own psychic suffering.

Continued.
#99 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
Tyranids, Orks and the two kinds of Eldar are covered.

The Necrontyr are a race of beings that were caged in bodies of necrodermis and had their souls sucked away from them by physical god-like insensate masses of sentient energy formed at the moment of creation named the C'tan. Their technology is literal aeons old, and thus far is still greatly in excess of Imperial tech. Their goal is the destruction of all sentient life to feed their C'tan masters, and for this reason the Tyranids avoid them like the plague - primarily because the Necrontyr do not have any biomass to consume.

Next and last is the Tau. They are a newly-risen-to-power faction of aliens which have nearly no presence in the Warp and have comparitively to the Imperium, somewhat advanced technology, consisting of plasma rifles and battle suits galore. They take after IRL communist values rather well, wanting to indoctrinate all of them for their Greater Good. They are slowly expanding through space near the borders of the Imperial pseudo-empire of Ultramar, and probably will get their shit pushed in at some point.
User avatar #100 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
And that's that. Any questions?
User avatar #104 - arkanios (10/16/2014) [-]
I have one: Can you also describe the different types of soldiers of the Imperial military? Like the Guardsmen, the Kriegs Who look the coolest to me, mainly because of the gasmasks and german soldier style , techpriests if they count, I'm not too familiar on Warhammer myself and I only know what I've read from FJ and any others?
User avatar #103 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Whelp... I believe you that it would weigh a ton to compile all this info.

So basically, everyone hates eachother. The humans are the babies of the universe and the necrontyr are the murderous and surprisingly spry grandpas of the universe. Orks are the barbarians. Elves are the pompous fucks who do whatever. Chaos is the grand evil which has a ever present presence cause everything is always in chaos. and the Tau are trying to establish a foothold in the universe by means of superiority.

Did I miss anything?
User avatar #105 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It wouldn't weight a ton at all! I'm just giving you the abridged version.

All in all though, that summary is pretty much that. There's even more to it - even a collection of series of novels where Black Library, GW's printing front, officially publishes works by the various authors.

Also, quite a few videogames.
User avatar #107 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Damn... I was always vaguely aware warhammer was popular... but I didn't know it was this popular.
#108 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It's been around since the 80's.

Yes, that Ork's head is being used as a hand grenade.
User avatar #109 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Hey, if you gotta look badass, you might as well do it in style, right?
User avatar #112 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
True. Oh well, that's about it for me. Ave Imperator, tovarisch.
User avatar #113 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Aye... and that's it on my end of things. Gonna hit the hay soon and dwell on this.
User avatar #114 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
And thanks for sharing all this!
#88 - There are literal Soviet and Tsarist Cossack-analogies in the … 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
#6 - Picture 10/16/2014 on (untitled) +3
#84 - Reply limit is a bitch. The very most basic description of the…  [+] (14 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +2
#94 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
Forgot a suitable picture for Chaos.
User avatar #90 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
Up next is the single largest threat to the Imperium and to the ordered universe as we know it. Chaos.

In 40k, there exists a dimension outside the laws of reality where souls and emotions and psychic energy hold more sway than anything. Things that prey on souls include the Daemons, which are creatures beyond reality who would like nothing more than to kill, eat, rape, mutate, change the very structure of your body, devour your soul or some combination thereof. Thankfully they can't exist in reality unless they find a physical form. When the do acquire physical form, needless to say they are near impossible to stop unless you drown them with firepower.

The corruptive capability of Chaos means that it draws sway all the sick-minded, evil, weak of will, or simply unfortunate simply by its very existence. These people form cults, secreted away where if they're intelligent they'll be beyond immediate Imperial retribution. For the most part, if they're lucky, they'll piddle about in rituals they barely know anything about and make a mess, or perhaps worm their way into the Imperial hierachy and corrupt it from within to make the Imperium weaker. If they're unlucky, they will succeed in their rituals and their patron deity of Chaos - there being four; Khorne the god of violence, rage and blood, Nurgle the god of pestilence, disease and death, Tzeentch the god of knowledge, magic and plots and Slaanesh the god of sensation, excess and lust - will take notice, and that never ends well.
Aside from the corrupted, most often whom formerly were loyal Imperial warriors, there are the Chaos Space Marines. For the most part, they were those left alive of the Traitor Legions after the defeat of Horus the Arch-traitor at the height of the Horus Heresy some eleven millenia ago. They have since fled to the Eye of Terror, a section in space where reality and the Warp overlap in a massive wound in reality.
#97 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
Next are the Xenos factions - or aliens, to put it simply.
In the eyes of the Imperium, what is not human and unwilling to serve the Emperor is to be dealt a swift death. Considering what lies in wait to prey on the Imperium, that is a fairly reasonable notion.
And all of these listed factions are at war with each other as much as they are with Chaos and the Imperium. Unlike those two, they are not unified.
The greatest xenos threat enroaching are the Tyranids, as pictured in this image. A race swarming in from beyond the stars in fleets of numbers too great to count, they are swooping down to consume the Imperium for its biomass, to add to its numbers where the Tyranid Swarm will move on to the next galaxy upon the devouring of all biomass.
Arguably the second greatest threat in numbers if not in outright volatility is the greenskin menace, the Orks. To put it lightly, they are an infestation of idiotic, psychic green-hued spacefaring barbarians who reproduce by spores and have technology that by all rights should not work, and yet due to a gesalt psychic field they exude, they can alter reality about them as they see fit. Orks being Orks, they use it to make the belief that 'Red wunz go fasta!' is actually fact. And thus, a red-painted Orky trukk will indeed go faster than a yellow-painted one. All of their technology is as such - if they believe it works, it works. They also get bigger and stronger the more they live and fight and enjoy themselves.
The next are the Eldar - a race of what is essentially space elves, both major kinds of which have technology, longevity and psyker resistance far in excess of humankind. One version live in planet-sized ships and travel about the galaxy predicting future events and altering them to their own fitting, while the other live in a city lodged inside another dimension, acting as murderous nymphomaniac pirates, enslaving and generally torturing whatever they please to try prolong their own psychic suffering.

Continued.
#99 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
Tyranids, Orks and the two kinds of Eldar are covered.

The Necrontyr are a race of beings that were caged in bodies of necrodermis and had their souls sucked away from them by physical god-like insensate masses of sentient energy formed at the moment of creation named the C'tan. Their technology is literal aeons old, and thus far is still greatly in excess of Imperial tech. Their goal is the destruction of all sentient life to feed their C'tan masters, and for this reason the Tyranids avoid them like the plague - primarily because the Necrontyr do not have any biomass to consume.

Next and last is the Tau. They are a newly-risen-to-power faction of aliens which have nearly no presence in the Warp and have comparitively to the Imperium, somewhat advanced technology, consisting of plasma rifles and battle suits galore. They take after IRL communist values rather well, wanting to indoctrinate all of them for their Greater Good. They are slowly expanding through space near the borders of the Imperial pseudo-empire of Ultramar, and probably will get their shit pushed in at some point.
User avatar #100 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
And that's that. Any questions?
User avatar #104 - arkanios (10/16/2014) [-]
I have one: Can you also describe the different types of soldiers of the Imperial military? Like the Guardsmen, the Kriegs Who look the coolest to me, mainly because of the gasmasks and german soldier style , techpriests if they count, I'm not too familiar on Warhammer myself and I only know what I've read from FJ and any others?
User avatar #103 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Whelp... I believe you that it would weigh a ton to compile all this info.

So basically, everyone hates eachother. The humans are the babies of the universe and the necrontyr are the murderous and surprisingly spry grandpas of the universe. Orks are the barbarians. Elves are the pompous fucks who do whatever. Chaos is the grand evil which has a ever present presence cause everything is always in chaos. and the Tau are trying to establish a foothold in the universe by means of superiority.

Did I miss anything?
User avatar #105 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It wouldn't weight a ton at all! I'm just giving you the abridged version.

All in all though, that summary is pretty much that. There's even more to it - even a collection of series of novels where Black Library, GW's printing front, officially publishes works by the various authors.

Also, quite a few videogames.
User avatar #107 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Damn... I was always vaguely aware warhammer was popular... but I didn't know it was this popular.
#108 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
It's been around since the 80's.

Yes, that Ork's head is being used as a hand grenade.
User avatar #109 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Hey, if you gotta look badass, you might as well do it in style, right?
User avatar #112 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
True. Oh well, that's about it for me. Ave Imperator, tovarisch.
User avatar #113 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Aye... and that's it on my end of things. Gonna hit the hay soon and dwell on this.
User avatar #114 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
And thanks for sharing all this!
#19 - Picture  [+] (1 new reply) 10/16/2014 on Needs more Seitokai Yakuindomo +22
#23 - tsds (10/16/2014) [-]
And another thumb for you!
#81 - You want to do this? Right here? Now?  [+] (3 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight 0
User avatar #92 - darthsalias (10/16/2014) [-]
yes
#89 - ryendan (10/16/2014) [-]
I'm replying because I want in. lol I wanna read stuffs too
User avatar #82 - ashedust (10/16/2014) [-]
Give me the rundown. Like, factions/what they stand for/who's against who and who're friends.
#80 - That's fair. I'd prefer not to overspecialize. Leaves too many…  [+] (3 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +1
#126 - sisterofbattle (10/16/2014) [-]
There is always room to specialize in kicking ass.
#152 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
God-Emperor damnit, do you have ANY soldiers which are not armed with flamers? Any at all?

Which idiot of a cogfucker designed that? That's pointless and needlessly excessive. Excess is a trait of the heretic cults.

Do you want heresy? Because that's how you get heresy.
#154 - sisterofbattle (10/16/2014) [-]
Idleness. Idleness breeds heresy. As well as an open mind.

We have a few in our ranks who prefer not to use flamers, but that's not important. Flamers are the answer to anything. Got cultists yelling in the streets? Trial by fire. Got orcs trying to invade a planet? Hey, those spores sure look flammable. Eldar trying to hatch foul xenos schemes? They're not going to have much of a chance when their hiding places are on fire.
#22 - Picture 10/16/2014 on Chaos Psyker +3
#74 - They're primarily siege infantry, though. Let's get y…  [+] (5 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Sight +2
User avatar #77 - dingdongpancakes (10/16/2014) [-]
Reason i like them is i'm a fan of siege warfare.
User avatar #80 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
That's fair. I'd prefer not to overspecialize. Leaves too many avenues open for the other guy to sneak a blade 'tween your ribs.
#126 - sisterofbattle (10/16/2014) [-]
There is always room to specialize in kicking ass.
#152 - krasnogvardiech (10/16/2014) [-]
God-Emperor damnit, do you have ANY soldiers which are not armed with flamers? Any at all?

Which idiot of a cogfucker designed that? That's pointless and needlessly excessive. Excess is a trait of the heretic cults.

Do you want heresy? Because that's how you get heresy.
#154 - sisterofbattle (10/16/2014) [-]
Idleness. Idleness breeds heresy. As well as an open mind.

We have a few in our ranks who prefer not to use flamers, but that's not important. Flamers are the answer to anything. Got cultists yelling in the streets? Trial by fire. Got orcs trying to invade a planet? Hey, those spores sure look flammable. Eldar trying to hatch foul xenos schemes? They're not going to have much of a chance when their hiding places are on fire.
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#1724 - konradkurze (10/16/2014) [-]
You are the Stalin Marine
#1725 to #1724 - krasnogvardiech (10/17/2014) [-]
Astartes are overrated. One in a billion, too.
User avatar #1716 - konradkurze (10/13/2014) [-]
the perfect Kras song

USA open your eyes.Russia's destiny
User avatar #1717 to #1716 - krasnogvardiech (10/13/2014) [-]
My god, it's amazing.
User avatar #1718 to #1717 - konradkurze (10/13/2014) [-]
americans love to preach how awesome they think they are without ever checking what others pack

they need to check how russian stuff beats them on the curve most of the time

and how ive seen some american kids bleat on about how americans get more hours doing stuff somehow makes them better.....they get edgy when i tell them "well maybe the russians dont need to spend so long to learn the same or better skills...."
User avatar #1719 to #1718 - krasnogvardiech (10/13/2014) [-]
It's the Tesla versus Edison argument. Yes, the Russians know what works, but the Americans spend time testing out and confirming what doesn't work.
User avatar #1720 to #1719 - konradkurze (10/13/2014) [-]
and the americans pack in a whole bunch of shiny **** they dont need and costs more while the russians just say "heres the budget, make it work"
User avatar #1721 to #1720 - krasnogvardiech (10/13/2014) [-]
Pretty much. You know you love the latter.
User avatar #1722 to #1721 - konradkurze (10/13/2014) [-]
russian stuff: so much better that R Lee Ermey had to **** with a gun trial just so the AK47 didnt pwn the m16 too badly
#1723 to #1722 - matexius (10/13/2014) [-]
I should start learning Russian more seriously...
seriously...
User avatar #1710 - konradkurze (09/21/2014) [-]
comrade
can i please have your FJ points
User avatar #1711 to #1710 - krasnogvardiech (09/21/2014) [-]
No.

I wanna hoard them this time. See how high I can get them.
User avatar #1712 to #1711 - konradkurze (09/21/2014) [-]
Kras and his shekels
User avatar #1713 to #1712 - krasnogvardiech (09/21/2014) [-]
FJ points. No jews here.

Imma hoard them like one tho still
User avatar #1714 to #1713 - konradkurze (09/21/2014) [-]
Kras the jewkrainian
User avatar #1715 to #1714 - krasnogvardiech (09/21/2014) [-]
Pretty much ae
User avatar #1704 to #1703 - krasnogvardiech (09/17/2014) [-]
absolutely disgusting
User avatar #1705 to #1704 - konradkurze (09/17/2014) [-]
wanna know the scary part of that pic?
User avatar #1706 to #1705 - krasnogvardiech (09/17/2014) [-]
It was an artist's approximation?
User avatar #1707 to #1706 - konradkurze (09/18/2014) [-]
no.....

scariest part is

I commissioned that Snooki pic to be drawn
User avatar #1709 to #1708 - konradkurze (09/18/2014) [-]
and thats just the cheap picture....i had another artist commission a more detailed pic of her to make it lifelike
#1702 - matexius (09/17/2014) [-]
Nevermind that message, I got it for now...
Fukken bronies, man; turning our love of The Emperor against us...

Sometimes, you have to do stupid **** for the things you believe in...
User avatar #1701 - konradkurze (09/05/2014) [-]
Battlefield 3 - The Russian Offensive
#1698 - matexius (09/03/2014) [-]
Hey Kras I need you to test something for me...
*injects Kras with a vial of Russianum 34 and after a brief period, he becomes a superhero of Mother Russia.*
And for the love of The Emperor; try to keep your underpants ''inside'' your suit...
there is the... ''minor'' side effect though...
#1700 to #1699 - matexius (09/05/2014) [-]
Speaking of which... Have you heard that the 'Muricans are gonna go and try to bomb/ invade Russia?
Haven't they learnt anything from Hitlers and Napoleons tries? I mean, waging war with Russia, with the coming of Winter...?
That's not war, that's a Deathwish...
User avatar #1691 - konradkurze (08/29/2014) [-]
*genetically modifies Kras to be a bear*
#1694 to #1693 - konradkurze (08/29/2014) [-]
i see an alcoholic bear on a unicycle
#1695 to #1694 - krasnogvardiech (08/29/2014) [-]
how the **** do i drive this thing
#1697 to #1696 - krasnogvardiech (08/29/2014) [-]
ubercharge is disgusting
User avatar #1677 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
Battlefield 3 - The Russian Offensive
#1672 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
Kras when meeting girls
#1673 to #1672 - krasnogvardiech (08/16/2014) [-]
Ну што, нз проблема.

>Мое лицо когда
User avatar #1674 to #1673 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
ваша кровь водка
User avatar #1676 to #1675 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
i want one thing to happen

we both know what it is

Red Alert 2 intro
User avatar #1678 to #1676 - krasnogvardiech (08/16/2014) [-]
The start of World War III?



Emperor's blood. No.
User avatar #1679 to #1678 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
russia putting the americans in their place

Gamehelper.com - WiC: Soviet Assault TrailerNew

needs to happen
User avatar #1680 to #1679 - krasnogvardiech (08/16/2014) [-]
Actually, that's a stupid idea. A better one would be a long-term military alliance. Less lives and less resources lost. The way we're headed, Fallout might become a reality. And that is a terrifying thought.
User avatar #1681 to #1680 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
well allying with usa means theyll try to ******** russia out of so much to profit usa and leave russia in ****

User avatar #1683 to #1681 - krasnogvardiech (08/16/2014) [-]
You didn't forget about the states' massive debt, right?
#1682 to #1681 - krasnogvardiech (08/16/2014) [-]
Russia's better off financially than the U.S is. It would be a blow to the Federation, certainly.

The only answer is space, tovarisch. Even a small asteroid is worth billions in scientific resources - as well as elements and materiel alien to our world.

I think the space race ought to be started up again.
User avatar #1684 to #1682 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
yeah there is space but then you'd have usa and the un bitch about "anything russia colonizes should be international access
same deal as that moon treaty where somehow the moon is supposedly international property

yeah usa has a massive debt even more reason theyd ******** russia out of its wealth

hell alaska was an illegal sale and usa refused to hand it back
User avatar #1685 to #1684 - krasnogvardiech (08/16/2014) [-]
The race would be combined. International access means that its resources would go to whoever needs it, with a hefty percentage going towards the nation/organization that did it.

The whole reason the US would ask for money is to pay off their debts in the first place. No reason save that - they hate the russkies too much. The States have the largest and most well-equipped army overall, no major need for military support.
User avatar #1686 to #1685 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
then that just leaves it open for greedy corporations to buy everything up over time thus ******** on other planets like they do to earth

best russia takes and holds on its own and lets normal people migrate to said planets and forbids corporate ownership
User avatar #1687 to #1686 - krasnogvardiech (08/16/2014) [-]
You've obviously never heard of the oligarchy. It's heading that way - the few, all over the world, are taking control of all its resources. Disney's doing it, BP Oil's doing it, everyone is.

It's all over the place. I actually care, though, about what they're going to do and what opportunity does it open up for the everyman.
User avatar #1688 to #1687 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
i say we need another yeltsin to march in with part of the army....kick out the government and also get rid of the oligarchs trying to own eveything
User avatar #1689 to #1688 - krasnogvardiech (08/16/2014) [-]
The oligarchs' owning it all isn't the problem. Having much under the control of many means that it's easier to organize **** .

That's part of the reason why the Red Army failed in the initial stages of World War 2's Soviet front. Poor, disorganized leadership. So much resources eventually got the work done, but it floundered about for a while.

Mobilization, tovarisch, is the issue. Putting resources in the right place. Space is the new place for funds - the Chinese are already on the plan, for ****** sake.
User avatar #1690 to #1689 - konradkurze (08/16/2014) [-]
yah but chinese are also a problem,,their leadership SUCKS....its still the few privileged and their friends / family getting rich and making the poor poorer and dispossessing the independent rich

like just a couple years back....some guy who owned a hotel near a river was forced to sell it for 10% of its value because the government wanted to flood the ricer to build a hydro power damn which meant his hotel would have been in the flood are otherwise

and oligarchs are one of the problems.....the rich shouldnt be allowed to buy more and create monopolies on resources...if we go to other planets we go without them and let normal people have a fresh start at prosperity
#1671 - konradkurze (08/10/2014) [-]
Kras vs america
#1662 - matexius (07/26/2014) [-]
Was bored...found this...
Was bored...found this...
User avatar #1663 to #1662 - krasnogvardiech (07/28/2014) [-]
Stop, my penis can only get so erect.
User avatar #1664 to #1663 - matexius (07/28/2014) [-]
...I have no idea how to react to that...

Also...what is your opinion on the addition of these webm.s?
User avatar #1665 to #1664 - krasnogvardiech (07/28/2014) [-]
**** can only get better, while the main section of the site still hates videos. I don't know what to think.
User avatar #1667 to #1665 - matexius (07/28/2014) [-]
Also...I hope you don't mind that I'm a bit more...let's say actve... The Belarussian girl that's the closest thing that I've ever had to a GF left for Russia for 4 weeks...and I'm bored halfway to the Imperial Palace and back...
User avatar #1668 to #1667 - krasnogvardiech (07/28/2014) [-]
All good. You'll have to watch for me being less active, though, as I have a thing called a job.
User avatar #1669 to #1668 - matexius (07/28/2014) [-]
I know, I know... What can you do? Money rules the world...
Have you ever like, had a GF even?
User avatar #1666 to #1665 - matexius (07/28/2014) [-]
Quite... 4chan already had them, right?
A former schoolmate said they'd be good to add... I was sceptical...
User avatar #1661 - languagexplain (07/25/2014) [-]
Please stop engaging the ********** on the TG board. He needs to not get any attention. At all. kthx.
User avatar #1670 to #1661 - krasnogvardiech (08/04/2014) [-]
I successfully disarmed a ********** with something very close to what he is *********** about. What you donna do about it?
User avatar #1660 - matexius (07/24/2014) [-]
www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLhC2eTkVCM

Something tells me you've heard this one...
#1657 - matexius (07/22/2014) [-]
Hey Krasno...
Would you happen to know of an energy source, that is small, yet efficient and could power a man sized mechanical exoskeleton, kinda like this one?

I'm planning on maybe starting something like it and I'm trying to find an energy source... I know it's probably futile, but hey... Why not?
My father says I should be less on the computer, so... I need to find ways to entertain myself... friend suggested this...
I know it's way out of my field of experties and education, but I want to show those Japs that they're not the only ones who can build one... Gonna cost a lot though...
User avatar #1658 to #1657 - krasnogvardiech (07/22/2014) [-]
No ******* clue. Tried making a tiny nuclear reactor?
User avatar #1659 to #1658 - matexius (07/22/2014) [-]
... Right...
I'm fairly sure a tiny nuclear reactor could horribly backfire... and there are things even I can't get my hands on... i was thinking something like a small tesla coil, connected to a divider where one part is then in turn connected back into the coil and another to the suit... just a spark to fire it up... probably wouldn't work, though...
Still thank you for your time...
User avatar #1656 - konradkurze (07/20/2014) [-]
trolling people the Kras way

Friends Joseph Stalin
User avatar #1652 - nought (07/19/2014) [-]
firt
User avatar #1653 to #1652 - krasnogvardiech (07/19/2014) [-]
Not first by a long shot, and if that was an attempt to flirt, it went over my head.

What's up?
User avatar #1654 to #1653 - nought (07/19/2014) [-]
wat u talkin bout
FIRT FIRT FIRT FIRT FIRT FIRT
User avatar #1647 - konradkurze (07/16/2014) [-]
Whatever Gets Us Drunk the Fastest | Metalpocalypse | Adult Swim
#1649 to #1648 - konradkurze (07/16/2014) [-]
< people who tried to **** with Kras' alcohol
#1650 to #1649 - krasnogvardiech (07/16/2014) [-]
More accurately tho.
#1651 to #1650 - konradkurze (07/16/2014) [-]
reminds me of when i do online gaming
#1645 - konradkurze (07/15/2014) [-]
Kras on a friday night
User avatar #1644 - konradkurze (07/15/2014) [-]
Enemy at the Gates (1/9) Movie CLIP - Crossing the Volga (2001) HD
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