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emmerich *Banned*   

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emmerich Avatar Level 214 Comments: Comedic Genius
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Date Signed Up:9/01/2013
Last Login:10/22/2014
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Ban reason:emmerich's comment was flagged by a MODERATOR on 07/13/2014 05:38:49 PM.Banned for 3072 Hours.Ban started on 11/14/2014 05:36:48 PM and ends on 03/22/2015 05:36:48 PM. Reason: Posting sexual/NSFW/sexy content. Boobs, butts, bikinis, jokes dealing with sexuality, etc. are not allowed.
Flagged By:ashedust
Flagged (Comment):#66901 on "barkhorn"
Comment text:
Yup...
I guess too much lewd 4 u
Ban Time Limit:2902:00:27
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    Kids these days Kids these days
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    Dracula orders a pizza Dracula orders a pizza
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    War in Syria War in Syria
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    Title Title
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    Donald without trousers Donald without trousers
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    Gotta slide 'em all Gotta slide 'em all
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    They.... swim? They.... swim?
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    Sup girls? Sup girls?
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    (untitled) (untitled)
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latest user's comments

#66910 - BEtter question: What were you doing there, Devol?  [+] (1 new reply) 07/13/2014 on barkhorn's profile 0
#66898 - Picture 07/13/2014 on barkhorn's profile 0
#94 - Picture 07/13/2014 on rdnyan's profile 0
#92 - Picture  [+] (2 new replies) 07/13/2014 on rdnyan's profile 0
#93 - rdnyan (07/13/2014) [-]
#94 - emmerich (07/13/2014) [-]
#1 - We r emprahs finest 07/13/2014 on Borealum 0
#3062 - notsoulmyr  [+] (1 new reply) 07/13/2014 on emmerich's profile 0
User avatar #3063 - notsoulmyr (07/13/2014) [-]
NO
#829 - I actually like it better than the first one... and that says … 07/12/2014 on mindsculptorjace's profile 0
#827 - I don't need card games when I have James Keller and his black…  [+] (2 new replies) 07/12/2014 on mindsculptorjace's profile 0
User avatar #828 - mindsculptorjace (07/12/2014) [-]
tfw haven't played prototype 2, only the first one
User avatar #829 - emmerich (07/12/2014) [-]
I actually like it better than the first one... and that says a lot cuz I really enjoyed prototype 1.
#825 - Picture  [+] (4 new replies) 07/12/2014 on mindsculptorjace's profile 0
#826 - mindsculptorjace (07/12/2014) [-]
you bad, card games. get good. more play.
#827 - emmerich (07/12/2014) [-]
I don't need card games when I have James Keller and his black funny ass.
User avatar #828 - mindsculptorjace (07/12/2014) [-]
tfw haven't played prototype 2, only the first one
User avatar #829 - emmerich (07/12/2014) [-]
I actually like it better than the first one... and that says a lot cuz I really enjoyed prototype 1.
#823 - Picture  [+] (6 new replies) 07/12/2014 on mindsculptorjace's profile 0
#824 - mindsculptorjace (07/12/2014) [-]
#825 - emmerich (07/12/2014) [-]
#826 - mindsculptorjace (07/12/2014) [-]
you bad, card games. get good. more play.
#827 - emmerich (07/12/2014) [-]
I don't need card games when I have James Keller and his black funny ass.
User avatar #828 - mindsculptorjace (07/12/2014) [-]
tfw haven't played prototype 2, only the first one
User avatar #829 - emmerich (07/12/2014) [-]
I actually like it better than the first one... and that says a lot cuz I really enjoyed prototype 1.
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Total unique items point value: 10500 / Total items point value: 20500

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#3070 - notsoulmyr (07/22/2014) [-]
stickied by emmerich
Here lies newgod
He was such a good friend.
He was the best friend I'll probably ever have.
And now he's dead.
He's ******* dead!
He's gone!
He's no more!
#728 - emmerich (11/30/2013) [+] (1 reply)
stickied by emmerich
Comment Picture
User avatar #3096 - ayumu (10/31/2014) [-]
rest in papa johns myself
#3095 - notsoulmyr (10/22/2014) [-]
My best friend
My only friend
I don't know which is more depressing
#3092 - notsoulmyr (09/15/2014) [-]
Never forget
#3090 - barkhorn has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #3089 - notsoulmyr (08/25/2014) [-]
I gathered enough internet speed to call you a gay

Ur gay
#3087 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
So you have your deck composed of 30 cards (minimum).

Number cards hold their corresponding number as their numerical value, and the Ace has 1 value. The goal of the game is to build a "caravan" between 21 points and 26 points. Any more or less and it doesn't count.

Now, there are also the King, Queen and Jack, but more on them later on.

You start with 8 cards in your hand, and at the first turn you are allowed to discard as many cards as you want, until you have your desired cards. First your opponent places a card, then you, then him again, and so until you have 3 caravans. From there on you have to build it until it gets to the desired number of points. So let's say I lay down a 6 (as I usually do), you can either go up or down in numerical value, BUT YOU CANNOT PLACE THE SAME NUMBER CARD. Also it doesn't have to be sequential, for example you can have 6, 7, 9, 10 or 3, 5, 7, 10 BUT it has to be in the same direction (higher or lower). UNLESS, HOWEVER, UNLESS you have a card of the same suit. So for example I have a 6 of spades as my starting card, then place a 3 of hearts. Now, I can either place a 2 or Ace of any suit OR I can place ANY card as long as it's a suit. So it can go like:

5♠, 1♦, 10♦.

Now, the face cards:
The King has one function: To double the numerical value of whatever card it's placed on. Also it's placed on the side of the card, not on top, for reasons I will explain a bit later. In the screenshot, I've placed a K♥ on 10♦, which makes it 20 points total. Also it can be used on an opponent to screw him over the limit.
The Jack can be placed on a card and it removes that card ALONG WITH ANY FACE CARDS ATTACHED TO IT. For example, if my oponent places a Jack on my 10♦+K♥, it would wipe both cards out, but keep the 6.
The Queen is a bit tricky, I'll explain in the next paragraph
#3088 to #3087 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
The Queen changes the suit and the direction of any placed card. So let's say I have:

3♠, 4♥, 7♠ and I place a Q♣ on the 7. Now my oponent can only place a card lower than a 7 AND it has to be a spade (the suit of the Queen placed).

Now the tricky part: The Joker. Luckily, NPCs almost never use it, but here's what it does:
-When played against an Ace: Jokers played on Aces remove all non-face cards of the Ace's suit from the table. A Joker played on an Ace of Spades, for example, removes the 2 through the 10 of Spades. This has no effect on cards whose suit has been changed by a Queen, nor on any cards played after the Joker
-When played against number card (2-10): Jokers played on number cards remove all other cards of this value from the table. For example, a Joker played on a 4 of Hearts removes all 4s (other than the card the Joker is played upon) from the table. This only affects cards played before the Joker.

Like I said, no NPC uses the Joker, so I don't bother learning this part.

Now, an almost sure-winning deck I've discovered is composed of 6s, 10s, Jacks, Kings and Queens, and maybe a few 3s and 5s. Basically you place either a 6 or a 10 as your starting card. If a 6, then add a 10 and apply a king to it (making 26 points), or if a 10, then add the king to it and then play a 6. Sometimes the NPC ***** me over with a Jack, so I have to use the 3s and 5s and Queens and **** him over with Jacks too.

Overall, pretty fun game, would play it in real life. Although you need different cards from different decks if you want to have more than 4 suits of the same card. For example, you can't have 2 Ace of Spade from The Tops, BUT you can have an Ace of Spades from The Tops, one from the Gomorrah, one from the Ultra Luxe etc etc.
#3078 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
Okay fag so you wanna play New Vegas?
I'll ******* tell you how to play New Vegas.
I'll make you a ******* monster of the desert who ***** bitches with his giant Deathclaw dick.

So, first thing's first: STARTING STATS, SKILLS, PERKS and TRAITS!
Generally, you don't need more than a 6 in anything, ALTHOUGH it's good to have a bit more invested in Intelligence because you get extra skill points when you level up. (You can increase your stats with a perk every other time you level up by the way, AND you can get special items, upgrades and implants that boost your stats). Also Charisma is useless most of the time, so don't bother putting points into that. Basically, you want to invest in STRENGHT (for weapon requirements), ENDURANCE (for HP and stuff), INTELLIGENCE (for skill points) and LUCK (good for criticals and winning at casinos). AGILITY is okay, but CHARISMA is useless and don't bother with PERCEPTION because one of your companions raises your PERCEPTION to 10 when you have him (although you should put some points into that if you want to use Energy Weapons).

Now, skills. You get to tag 3 skills (raises said skills by 15 points, I think) at the start of the game. I go with Lockpicking, Medicine, Repair OR Speech. It never hurts to have all 4 of those, but Repair and Speech I feel are especially vital to you. You can use Speech to solve pretty much every final conflict without firing your weapon, if you wanna feel like a smooth talking badass. After that, you should get Repair to 90 as soon as you can, then level up what you want.

Now, depending on how you wanna fight, you have 4 ways you can approach things: Weapons, Energy Weapons, Melee and Unarmed. (There's also Explosive, but there aren't that many long range weapons for that, so I don't consider it a main style). Now, there are a lot of differences between these four, but I'll try to simplify then as much as I can:
#3079 to #3078 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
-UNARMED: Do you like punching things? Do you like to punch things so hard they explode into a featureless pile of guts? Then this is the skill for you. If you wanna fight close-range, you gotta invest some skills in ENDURANCE and at least 6 in Agility. An important thing to note is that Unarmed is only "gauntlet" type weapons that rely heavily on criticals and VATS, because that gives you bonus unarmed damage. This is important, because most Unarmed perks give you bonus crits, whereas MELEE doesn't rely much on crits and rather on raw base damage. Speaking of
-MELEE: Sometimes you really just wanna swing a big ******* hammer into the skulls or your enemies, or you wanna be a samurai cowboy bounty hunter. Melee weapons have more variety than Unarmed, and deal more base damage, but are **** with Crits most of the times. In fact, there is a trait that makes your weapons hit harder but do less critical damage. So you gotta think carefully what you want. Personally I prefer unarmed because it just never gets old to punch people into piles of chunky salsa, even if you have to take a few hits to get up close.
-WEAPONS: A lot of variety, a lot of ammo types. Although really, you're gonna use like, 3 or 4 weapons after you have the requirements (I stick to the Anti-Materiel Rifle). The good thing about this style is that you can make your own ammo by salvaging ammo you don't need, as long as it's for the same type of weapon. Also people in the wasteland use mostly guns, so you won't be short on ammo.
-ENERGY WEAPONS: Less varied than regular guns and with only 3 ammo types, using Energy Weapons can be difficult because not a lot of people sell the ammo for them. However, Energy Weapons hit like a truck. Also you can get a perk that, when you kill an enemy with an energy weapon, they ******* explode with energy and damage other around them. It's pretty much worth investing into, just to see that. But whatever you're most comfortable with.
#3080 to #3079 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
Now, usually I don't bother to pick Traits because most of them have both good and bad sides to them, BUT there is one trait called "Wild Wasteland" which adds a lot of stupid, random, funny may-mays to your game. The only time I WOULDN'T recommend picking it up is if you wanna go Energy Weapons, because there is a weapon that is replaced if you have the mod. And that weapon is my favorite, and one of the most powerful E.Weapons out there. But chances are you're gonna play through this thing at least twice, so keep that in mind.

Now, I won't spoil the factions for you, BUT I will say this: If you choose to side with the Legion you're gonna have a way harder time because the NCR is ******* everywhere. Unless you play things stealthily, you are gonna get hated by the NCR and they will attack you on sight. Now, if you're extra sneaky and get a certain perk that lets you kill people in their sleep (Like I did) you can basically clear entire camps without them noticing. But. However. This is very important.

QUICKSAVE EVERY TIME YOU ARE GOING TO KILL/PICKPOCKET SOMEONE IMPORTANT (I.E. SOMEONE WITH A NAME)!!! If you fail, or kill someone vital, you will fail a quest, get hated by that faction, and other generally unpleasant things will happen to you.

Also create regular saves every time you do an important quest. I've screwed myself over so many times because I was too lazy to make a save and instead just quicksaved. It's not the same thing. You can create as many saves as you want, BUT every time you quicksave it overrides your previous quicksave and you have no way to go back to that one.

So yeah, as I was saying, you'll have an easier time if you side the NCR or at least don't actively kill them. They have more quest and more camps, so just keep that in mind.
#3081 to #3080 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
Another important thing to note is that if you do a certain amount of quest for a certain faction (NCR, House, Legion, Yes Man) you will become unable to do quests for the other factions. So it's generally better to do as many sidequests as you can before going through the main story. Also in some cases the main story is tied with your side quests, so you'll save yourself time later on.

Now, COMPANIONS. There are like 5 or 6 of them, but you're only gonna use 2 or 3. The first one, ED-E who you MOST DEFINATELY WANT TO KEEP AT ALL TIMES, can be found in Primm, which is about 5 minutes away from the starting city. He's useful for carrying **** , as well as the +10 PERCEPTION bonus. After that you have Boone, who's kind of broken record about something I won't spoil, but he's a ******* monster in combat. HOWEVER if you're going to play Legion you won't be able to use him because he really doesn't like the Legion, since they stole his ice cream. Lastly there's Veronica, who is useful for getting into the Brotherhood of Steel without them blowing your head off. They're NEETs you see, and she's one of them. Also she's generally just a fun person to have in the ******* wasteland. Oh and she punches things to death. And she's a lesbian . The other companions are nice, but since Boone is so OP I don't use anyone else.

NOW, the Brotherhood of Steel. You'll want to have Veronica with you the first time you go there, otherwise they're gonna turn you into swiss cheese. They're kind of a group of jews, so you're gonna have to work your ass off if you wanna wear the cool armor. An important thing to note is that 2 of the 4 endings available require you to destroy them. So again, do their quests before the main story ones. Also, DO NOT REPLACE THE CURRENT ELDER. Otherwise you'll have to destroy them in 3 out of 4 endings. After you do a bunch of quests for them, you'll become a Paladin, you'll get your armor and you'll be kewl
#3082 to #3081 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
Oh, I forgot to mention, but every companion has his/her/it's own side quest you can do for cool equipment and XP. Veronica's and Arcade Gannon's quests give you cool items, so I'd do those if I were you. Also Boone's gives him a unique armor which is pretty cool, so do his too.

There are two types of collectibles in the Mojave wasteland: Snowglobes and Sunset Sarsaparilla Star Bottle Caps. The Snowglobes are 7 or 8 in the main game, and 1 in each DLC. For every snowglobe you collect, you can turn int with Mr.House's robo-whore and she will give you 2k caps for each one. Also you get an achievement for collecting all the main snowglobes. As for the caps, some of them are fixed, some you can get by drinking Sunset Sarsaparilla. If you collect 50 of them, you'll get a special quest that makes you feel cool. Also an achievement.

Also you can gamble for cash. You can also get banned from casinos if you win too much. And an achievement for getting banned everywhere. You'll need a LUCK of at least 9 (10 with some clothes) to win without thinking too much. It's an easy way to win some caps if you're ever short, although I never was.

NOW, the DLCs:
#3083 to #3082 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER: Dead Money, Honest Hearts, Old World Blues, Lonesome Road
RECOMMENDED ORDER: Honest Hearts, Old World Blues (see bellow), Dead Money, Lonesome Road

DEAD MONEY: I hate this DLC. If you don't know what you're doing it's gonna suck so hard. What you need to know is that once you start, you'll get stripped of all your gear, you can't leave until you finish, and you'll feel like you're playing a survival horror game instead of Fallout. Also you'll be short on supplies unless you have a walkthrough. The only redeeming quality of this DLC is that when you finish it, if you pull your cards right, you will be so rich you will never have to worry about money ever again. However once you leave you won't be able to come back. RECOMMENDED LEVEL: Around 30 or higher.

HONEST HEARTS: This one is nice. Not too hard, you don't get your equipment taken, but you won't be able to leave until you finish it. However you have a ******* awesome NPC, probably one of the best in New Vegas as a whole. You can go in pretty much whenever you want, but I would recommend about 25-30. Also you can't go back, just like Dead Money.

OLD WORLD BLUES: The best DLC for this game. However it's really ******* hard. The enemies take a lot of abuse, and ammo is a bit scarse. Although it never got the point where I was too bothered by it. Also you can go back after you finish it. RECOMMENDED LEVEL: 30 or above. I recommend you have at least 75 lockpick and 50 Science, although a full 100 Science will help you A LOT in this one since most of the enemies are robots.

LONESOME ROAD: This one is best played last because the others build up to the encounter with Ulysses, plus it's kind of hard if you're not prepared for all out battle. It's a bit linear, but full of action. Also you can go back whenever you want, although it never got too hard for me. Also one of the best armors is in this game, along with MURIKAH rocket launcher.
#3084 to #3083 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
Personal ranking: OWB >> Lonesome Road > Honest Hearts >>>>>> Dead Money

And finally: Mods! If you have Nexus Mod Manager (if you don't, get it), go to the Nexus and pick whatever mods you like and don't need too much work to set up. Personally, I use mostly cosmetic mods. I recommend:
-EVE - Essential Visual Enhancement. Especially if you use E.Weapons
-Centered 3rd Person Camera - for when you wanna scroll out really far.
-CR-HD - Combat Ranger Armor Retexture - for glowy eyes
-MTUI - For a smaller font in the menus
#3085 to #3084 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
Oh and one last thing, some useful/fun perks:
-Black Widow/Lady Killer - does 10% more damage to the oposite sex (depending on your own gender) and opens up some unique dialogue choices
-Confirmed Bachelor/[can't remember the other one] - Like above, 10% damage to the SAME sex, and unique dialogue choices
-Jury Rigging - In my opinion the BEST perk, because you can repair things with similar things. Otherwise you repair things with ONLY the same thing, which kinda sucks
-Mister Sandman - Allows you to kill sleeping characters and with bonus XP. Useful if you wanna take out an entire base without raising an alarm.
-Slayer - Especially if you use melee/unarmed, it increases your attack speed by 30%
-Them's Good Eatings - Every time you kill an enemy there's a chance it will drop Red Paste or Blood Sausage. In Normal Mode, this will pretty much eliminate the need to eat.
-Pack Rat - Any item that weights up to 2lbs is reduced by half. Useful for hoarding **** .
#3086 to #3085 - notsoulmyr (08/22/2014) [-]
Oh and Bloody Mess.
Get Bloody Mess
Every time, get Bloody Mess
Bloody Mess is essential.
#3076 - notsoulmyr (08/04/2014) [-]
Cough up that spaghetti money bitch *****
#3075 - notsoulmyr (08/03/2014) [-]
Still dead
#3074 - notsoulmyr (07/30/2014) [-]
261 hours
User avatar #3073 - holeymoley (07/30/2014) [-]
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#3072 - notsoulmyr (07/25/2014) [-]
MFW YFW
User avatar #3071 - twillight (07/22/2014) [-]
You suck horse dick and gargle their **** .
User avatar #3069 - crobog (07/22/2014) [-]
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