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Last status update:
Personal Info
Date Signed Up:11/10/2012
Last Login:12/31/2012
FunnyJunk Career Stats
Comment Thumbs: 1628 total,  1800 ,  172
Content Level Progress: 6.77% (4/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 27% (27/100)
Level 216 Comments: Comedic Genius → Level 217 Comments: Comedic Genius
Total Comments Made:174
FJ Points:1631

latest user's comments

#87 - recently, my eyes have started to go green around the edges. … 11/22/2012 on Heterochromia 0
#30 - "no matter what happens, know that I'll always love you&q… 11/21/2012 on sad crab comp +2
#53 - oh wait, why am I asking the internet if I'm being too racist? 11/21/2012 on Humans > Abnormals -2
#52 - Is it bad that I became significantly disgusted at the idea of…  [+] (13 new replies) 11/21/2012 on Humans > Abnormals -33
User avatar
#98 - agitatedscientist (11/21/2012) [-]
I'm white, and I've had a black girlfriend for five days now. We already attract quite a bit of negative attention because of this line of reasoning.
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#74 - GIJorge (11/21/2012) [-]
Sorry to everyone, but I agree. Looks so freaking wrong. I know a nordic girl (white as they come) that only wants to date black people, and Jesus, it's pathetic, looks so freaking wrong.
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#73 - smercenary (11/21/2012) [-]
Is it a coincidence that most racist people are uneducated fucks? I don't think so...
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#77 - mydogizmexican (11/21/2012) [-]
whats your problem? im not racist either but im just not attracted to african americans.. but i'd fuck a an asian or mexican any day (female perferably)
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#79 - smercenary (11/21/2012) [-]
You misinterpreted my comment. I never said preference had anything to do with it. Only racism. now read the comment I responded to.
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#80 - mydogizmexican (11/21/2012) [-]
he said he doesnt seem to like blacks with whites? i see nothing wrong with it.. people have their own personal opinion on things. i dont know why im not attracted to african americans, no one i know is racist, nor am i..
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#81 - smercenary (11/21/2012) [-]
Exactly, I also don't hate gays. Only uneducated people are homophobic or racist. Your preference does not make you a bad person.
#93 - trowlernotparas (11/21/2012) [-]
hurrr im sure there are plenty of people with an ivy league college degree that are either racist or homophobic
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#82 - mydogizmexican (11/21/2012) [-]
i think i may have actually misunderstood what you had meant, i had assumed you were calling elkhemist an uneducated fuck of a racist
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#69 - mrgoodbunny (11/21/2012) [-]
I bet you wouldn't be abel to beat up anyone.
#68 - cakeisawesome has deleted their comment.
#56 - tubaplayah (11/21/2012) [-]
Yeah that's pretty racist. Of course i'm not objectionable at since i'm black and my girlfriend is white.
#53 - elkhemist (11/21/2012) [-]
oh wait, why am I asking the internet if I'm being too racist?
#26 - **elkhemist rolled user kirkbot ** I like content from thi…  [+] (1 new reply) 11/21/2012 on Best self promotion ever!! +4
#27 - kirkbot (11/21/2012) [-]
This image has expired
#57 - this gif is so satisfying... ...and I dont know why... 11/21/2012 on I Could Watch For Hours +2
#56 - first time I had sex, my dick looked pretty much like that.  [+] (1 new reply) 11/21/2012 on I Could Watch For Hours +1
#62 - tastyscoundrel (11/21/2012) [-]
#242 - this hurts my brain.... 11/21/2012 on What a Tesseract (4D Cube)... 0
#94 - haha, stole your face. nah, just kidding. you can hav… 11/20/2012 on Give Pikachu a face +12
#6 - If you'd make this British English, it would be computer chips.  [+] (1 new reply) 11/20/2012 on Computer Fries +113
#125 - Shinehammer has deleted their comment.
#24 - am I too late to give slender a face?  [+] (1 new reply) 11/19/2012 on give slenderman a face comp +40
#25 - cleavage (11/19/2012) [-]
#110 - Well, original anon was also being a faggot for calling people… 11/19/2012 on AntEaterEatingAnt 0
#92 - I cannot say just how much I love you right now no homo  [+] (2 new replies) 11/19/2012 on AntEaterEatingAnt +17
#97 - mhden (11/19/2012) [-]
#483 - cartridge (11/20/2012) [-]
Now in .gif
#79 - Now, here is where you are wrong. You see, most of FJ hav…  [+] (2 new replies) 11/19/2012 on AntEaterEatingAnt +2
#106 - anon (11/19/2012) [-]
Another anon. I must say, I once had an account too, but I deleted it because I got fed up with the hypocrisy that many users, like you're doing right now, show.

You see, you're wrong about responsability. You talk like it's a big deal if an user says something that other users don't like. What are you gonna get, red thumbs? So what? Do you lose a dollar/euro/yen/whatever for each red thumb? Does your life somehow turn for the worse if you accept those red thumbs? Do you bear a mark forever that somehow taints you and prevents you from reaching happiness?

No, you don't. You get red thumbs and that's all, and in a few hours, days if it takes long, your comment will be forgotten. Just like the comment from an anon. However you have some privileges that anons don't have, like uploading reaction images or having the chance to write more comments than anons do. And all for what? For having to deal with a "punishment" worth nothing? Come on.

Besides, you're centered in bad comments, but what happens when an anon says something that the community agrees with? Do you tell those anons to log on so you can give them green thumbs? Let me guess, you don't. You only rant when they say things that you don't like. It's only then that we anons "aren't men" and you complain about us not having an account. Not that those green thumbs have any value anyway, just like the red ones do.

You sir are very hypocrital, and think you are better than anons because you take a responsability that you aren't really paying for. The red thumbs did no damage to you, but you claim that they do, and then you whine when an anon, who is getting the same punishment, which is NO punishment at all, doesn't have an account so you can deal with your frustration by pressing a button to make you feel better about yourself.

#110 - elkhemist (11/19/2012) [-]
Well, original anon was also being a faggot for calling people who do what they want betafaggots, when they are the ones who have taken their lives into their own hands instead of insisting on their own tyrannical views of manliness to deal with their insecurities.
but whatever.
(also for me, there's more shame in getting -88 thumbs on a comment than there is any actual punishment)
#75 - I request a picture of this card with a piece of paper saying …  [+] (7 new replies) 11/19/2012 on AntEaterEatingAnt +19
User avatar
#295 - cyanidesandvich (11/19/2012) [-]
i have one or 2 of these, but some guy already delivered.
#84 - Ryu (11/19/2012) [-]
Here you go ^_^

...also something for that fetish you dont have
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#317 - subcelestial (11/19/2012) [-]

The day OP delivered.
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#93 - SognaVetr (11/19/2012) [-]
OP delivers, what a glorious day!
#92 - elkhemist (11/19/2012) [-]
I cannot say just how much I love you right now
no homo
#97 - mhden (11/19/2012) [-]
#483 - cartridge (11/20/2012) [-]
Now in .gif
#193 - stop being an impatient bitch and actually do something then. 11/19/2012 on How to play Sims (I Think...) 0
#144 - whether it be happiness or sad, I prefer comics which induce e… 11/19/2012 on An elevating work out 0
#269 - well, yeah. But I once made a comic about how some rabbits are… 11/18/2012 on A mobile hell 0
#169 - this comic actually terrifies me... I mean, not just the a…  [+] (2 new replies) 11/18/2012 on A mobile hell +5
User avatar
#264 - tardaasa (11/18/2012) [-]
It´s a comic that can be funny to those who relates to do it. A lot of my comics are.

#269 - elkhemist (11/18/2012) [-]
well, yeah. But I once made a comic about how some rabbits are all like "shit better run back home" in danger, but some are all "aww shit better kick a nigga in the face". I included a little anecdote about how my uncle Jack once straight up killed a guinea pig by kicking him.
But seriously, its funny to rabbits who can relate to it.
#168 - He's not really being verbose as such, just using fancy wo… 11/18/2012 on A mobile hell +2
#18 - BUT ARE YOU PLAYING IT WITH YOUR BALLS 11/17/2012 on Creepy Street Music Player +1
#74 - "dude, what colour are boats meant to be?" "…  [+] (3 new replies) 11/17/2012 on Iconic Pictures -12
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#97 - Davidowns (11/17/2012) [-]
Those are american landing crafts I balieve.. They were fucking grey you douche.
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#77 - sgc (11/17/2012) [-]
or maybe they were grey
#76 - jokeface (11/17/2012) [-]
#73 - this comment is the only reason that I can now post comments w… 11/17/2012 on Skyrim Bandits +1
#2 - JESUS ******* CHRIST THIS IS DEEPLY DISTURBING WHAT IS EVE…  [+] (1 new reply) 11/16/2012 on keep breathing +15
User avatar
#4 - Stosh (11/16/2012) [-]
Nothing's wrong with it, someone is just pulling the loose skin on the cat's neck and face away from the camera
#6 - once, I was wondering around Skyrim and decided I'd actually r…  [+] (11 new replies) 11/16/2012 on Skyrim Bandits +176
#73 - elkhemist (11/17/2012) [-]
this comment is the only reason that I can now post comments with this account.
as a reward, have this ferret.

thank you all.
#38 - siggythepiggy (11/17/2012) [-]
When you have nearly killed a bandit
and the bandit begs for mercy.
You think "Eh, I'll let him go, since I'm a cool dude and all."
He regains 5 HP
User avatar
#35 - fyaq (11/16/2012) [-]
that rustled me a bit.

now i feel bad for killing literally everyone i could find...

now the regret is gone. BACK TO KILLING :D
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#18 - bitchplzzz (11/16/2012) [-]
Then seduced him and had sensual sex.
#65 - cockasian (11/17/2012) [-]
sensual and non-consensual
#34 - ishalltroll (11/16/2012) [-]
#17 - zekeon (11/16/2012) [-]
I tried to do something like that on Skyrim once....

It did not go as planned.
User avatar
#14 - whycanticaps (11/16/2012) [-]

But then one day, I was wandering around a bandit hideout. I happened to stop for a second and listen to a guy talk. I'd already killed more or less everyone else, and thee wouldnt be anything else of value here, so it wouldnt hurt.
I listened to him say about how he only has one more payment of his bounty, then he'd be a freeman. He said about all the stuff he would do once he's free; go buy a proper place to live, get an actual job, etc.
I stood there, listening to this guy talk about how excited he was for the future. How much he could do. And he seemed so real...

but then I shot an arrow into his head, because he was a bandit, and he would have tried to kill me if he saw me
#13 - tanglenose (11/16/2012) [-]
#10 - itsmypenis has deleted their comment.
#8 - kneehumper (11/16/2012) [-]
That was actually a touching story!

I've killed so many bandits in my days...
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