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ebperik

Last status update:
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Gender: male
Age: 21
Date Signed Up:5/16/2011
Last Login:8/20/2016
Location:Betelgeuse
FunnyJunk Career Stats
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Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
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Level 227 Comments: Mind Blower → Level 228 Comments: Mind Blower
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Content Views:2872
Times Content Favorited:9 times
Total Comments Made:1227
FJ Points:2829
Favorite Tags: Nigel Thornberry (2)
They don't think it be like it is, but it do
Truer words have never been spoken

latest user's comments

#985933 - The distances you have to travel to ring the first bell aren't…  [+] (7 new replies) 06/28/2014 on Video Games 0
User avatar
#985939 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
You're also in the wrong area. New Londo is way later, you should be in the Depths and/or Blighttown. You can't even fight the New Londo boss without another boss dead and wearing a certain ring.

Also, do not upgrade resistance. At all. Put the points somewhere else.
User avatar
#985943 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
Fuck, the guy sitting close to the bonfire in Firelink Shrine told me to go there.
Thanks for the advise man
User avatar
#985948 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
He said to go "Down".
Blighttown is also down. Did you take the master key as a starting gift, or start as a thief? Because on the way down to New Londo is a shortcut into Blighttown that lets you skip the Depths and most of Blighttown, both of which are ass pain areas.
User avatar
#985959 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
Well, he is sitting close to some stairs that go down so it made sense to me.
I have the master key, but I don't think I want to skip the Depths. I've been enjoying the game and I don't feel like skipping any part of it
User avatar
#986081 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
Lordran is not a land of sense.
User avatar
#986504 - ebperik (06/29/2014) [-]
I'm realizing that
User avatar
#985995 - Timmietim (06/28/2014) [-]
You literally did that lel
#985907 - **** man, haven't your parents told you about the obligatory T…  [+] (2 new replies) 06/28/2014 on Video Games 0
User avatar
#985909 - swiiftninja (06/28/2014) [-]
So you admit you're lying
User avatar
#985937 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
I'm not lying, it was just a joke. If you don't believe, I can't really do anything about that
#985900 - I don't have the time to play 24/7  [+] (13 new replies) 06/28/2014 on Video Games 0
User avatar
#985905 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
No, nigger.
How the fuck did you get to the New Londo Ruins in a few days on your first playthrough?
User avatar
#985933 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
The distances you have to travel to ring the first bell aren't that long, and the enemies up to that point are pretty much a one or two hit kill. I killed the merchant in Undead Parish or Undead Burg(can't remember which one) and got the Uchigatana. With that I killed everything easily and when I got to the blacksmith, I upgraded the shit out of it. I've been upgrading Vitality, Dexterity, Strength and Resistance exclusively.
User avatar
#985939 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
You're also in the wrong area. New Londo is way later, you should be in the Depths and/or Blighttown. You can't even fight the New Londo boss without another boss dead and wearing a certain ring.

Also, do not upgrade resistance. At all. Put the points somewhere else.
User avatar
#985943 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
Fuck, the guy sitting close to the bonfire in Firelink Shrine told me to go there.
Thanks for the advise man
User avatar
#985948 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
He said to go "Down".
Blighttown is also down. Did you take the master key as a starting gift, or start as a thief? Because on the way down to New Londo is a shortcut into Blighttown that lets you skip the Depths and most of Blighttown, both of which are ass pain areas.
User avatar
#985959 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
Well, he is sitting close to some stairs that go down so it made sense to me.
I have the master key, but I don't think I want to skip the Depths. I've been enjoying the game and I don't feel like skipping any part of it
User avatar
#986081 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
Lordran is not a land of sense.
User avatar
#986504 - ebperik (06/29/2014) [-]
I'm realizing that
User avatar
#985995 - Timmietim (06/28/2014) [-]
You literally did that lel
User avatar
#985925 - adunsaveme (06/28/2014) [-]
yeah mang, it's right under firelink shrine, you can go straight there
User avatar
#985916 - tylosaurus (06/28/2014) [-]
Maybe he went there early. The elevator is available from the start after all.
User avatar
#985927 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
Okay, rephrasing my question.
WHY the fuck would anyone be there after just a few days, with a uchigatana.
#985885 - I bought Dark Souls a few days ago and holy **** is it good. I…  [+] (30 new replies) 06/28/2014 on Video Games 0
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#985910 - tylosaurus (06/28/2014) [-]
So did you get the lordvessel?
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#985941 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
Never heard of it
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#986036 - alstorp (06/28/2014) [-]
u fukt up
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#985945 - tylosaurus (06/28/2014) [-]
Yeah uhm, you skipped a big part then. You're not really supposed to be there yet.
Get to anor londo after you have rung the two bells.
#986505 - ebperik (06/29/2014) [-]
Turns out I've been going about Dark Souls far too logically. Guess you shouldn't do that
User avatar
#986507 - tylosaurus (06/29/2014) [-]
Yeah it seems so. Didn't you read/listen to what the guy in the asylum said and the crestfallen guy in firelink shrine? They tell you to ring the two bells.
User avatar
#986510 - ebperik (06/29/2014) [-]
I don't really know where the second bell is, and I tend to skip through the NPC dialogue/monologue. I didn't know what to do, so I went to back to the start and talked to the first guy I met. He told me to go down, so I did
User avatar
#986520 - tylosaurus (06/29/2014) [-]
You go down indeed, but you don't go towards the giant flooded city. There's another path that leads to a door. You can use the master key to open that for a shortcut to blighttown. Otherwise, you have to go there from The Depths after beating the gaping dragon, I believe.
Down there, you have to kill quelaag. When you have rung the two bells, you can go back to andre the blacksmith and go to sen's fortress. From there, you beat the iron golem and get to anor londo. When you beat anor londo, you get the lord vessel and you can teleport around from bonfires that you have been to.
User avatar
#986527 - ebperik (06/29/2014) [-]
Teleporting would be pretty useful. Killing the same enemies in the same place get's boring after a while
User avatar
#985903 - adunsaveme (06/28/2014) [-]
hurr durk sols isnt hard lole xd praise da sun xDDD
User avatar
#985888 - swiiftninja (06/28/2014) [-]
Yeah ok
Problem 1) New Londo Ruins, ok keep going there, good progress
Problem 2) Using a Dex sword, keep doing that, Str isn't amazing
Problem 3) Wow only 2-3 deaths, definately not a liar or anything
User avatar
#985907 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
Shit man, haven't your parents told you about the obligatory Truth-pact you have to enter before you post on the internet?
User avatar
#985909 - swiiftninja (06/28/2014) [-]
So you admit you're lying
User avatar
#985937 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
I'm not lying, it was just a joke. If you don't believe, I can't really do anything about that
User avatar
#985887 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
>Few days ago
>New Londo

What the fuck.
User avatar
#985900 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
I don't have the time to play 24/7
User avatar
#985905 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
No, nigger.
How the fuck did you get to the New Londo Ruins in a few days on your first playthrough?
User avatar
#985933 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
The distances you have to travel to ring the first bell aren't that long, and the enemies up to that point are pretty much a one or two hit kill. I killed the merchant in Undead Parish or Undead Burg(can't remember which one) and got the Uchigatana. With that I killed everything easily and when I got to the blacksmith, I upgraded the shit out of it. I've been upgrading Vitality, Dexterity, Strength and Resistance exclusively.
User avatar
#985939 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
You're also in the wrong area. New Londo is way later, you should be in the Depths and/or Blighttown. You can't even fight the New Londo boss without another boss dead and wearing a certain ring.

Also, do not upgrade resistance. At all. Put the points somewhere else.
User avatar
#985943 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
Fuck, the guy sitting close to the bonfire in Firelink Shrine told me to go there.
Thanks for the advise man
User avatar
#985948 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
He said to go "Down".
Blighttown is also down. Did you take the master key as a starting gift, or start as a thief? Because on the way down to New Londo is a shortcut into Blighttown that lets you skip the Depths and most of Blighttown, both of which are ass pain areas.
User avatar
#985959 - ebperik (06/28/2014) [-]
Well, he is sitting close to some stairs that go down so it made sense to me.
I have the master key, but I don't think I want to skip the Depths. I've been enjoying the game and I don't feel like skipping any part of it
User avatar
#986081 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
Lordran is not a land of sense.
User avatar
#986504 - ebperik (06/29/2014) [-]
I'm realizing that
User avatar
#985995 - Timmietim (06/28/2014) [-]
You literally did that lel
User avatar
#985925 - adunsaveme (06/28/2014) [-]
yeah mang, it's right under firelink shrine, you can go straight there
User avatar
#985916 - tylosaurus (06/28/2014) [-]
Maybe he went there early. The elevator is available from the start after all.
User avatar
#985927 - EdwardNigma (06/28/2014) [-]
Okay, rephrasing my question.
WHY the fuck would anyone be there after just a few days, with a uchigatana.
User avatar
#985897 - adunsaveme (06/28/2014) [-]
>ruins
#85 - She isn't a whale, but there isn't any way I can prove anything 06/23/2014 on Wingman 0
#67 - One of the girls didn't really match with my taste in women. S…  [+] (3 new replies) 06/23/2014 on Wingman +4
#86 - kulamia (06/23/2014) [-]
Okay wait they were attempting to fuck you and YOU SAID NO!?!?! Dude if there's an afterlife you'll be taking that shit PAST the grave.

Goodluck man, I hope you get another chance with them.
User avatar
#73 - anusraper (06/23/2014) [-]
lol, "the hair didn't match" maybe she was a whale ?
User avatar
#85 - ebperik (06/23/2014) [-]
She isn't a whale, but there isn't any way I can prove anything
#978380 - I don't know where you're getting the 77 people from. If I'm c… 06/23/2014 on Video Games 0
#978365 - Did I ever mention anything about them being obliged to change…  [+] (2 new replies) 06/23/2014 on Video Games 0
User avatar
#978368 - teoberry (06/23/2014) [-]
>this nigga
It's a change.org petition. 77 people will not change shit. I'm sure more than 77 people wanted dildo attachments in whatever the last cod was, but that didn't happen, now did it?
User avatar
#978380 - ebperik (06/23/2014) [-]
I don't know where you're getting the 77 people from. If I'm correct, there are currently 349 supporters on the petition. It's not like this petition is the only way people have been showing their dismay. If people show that their not satisfied with the product, it's more likely for a company to make a change, than if no one voiced their opinions about the product.
Besides, I'm not saying it will actually accomplish anything, but I'd rather make my small effort, than sit on my ass and bitch all day
I don't like your condescending tone
#12 - This weekend I had the chance to have a threesome with two gir…  [+] (11 new replies) 06/22/2014 on Wingman +73
#79 - brenton (06/23/2014) [-]
User avatar
#37 - reginleif (06/23/2014) [-]
> I need someone to smack me over the head with a frying pan

That's also the wingman's job.
#35 - kulamia (06/23/2014) [-]
How did you fuck up a 3 way with 2 girls who wanted it?
#67 - ebperik (06/23/2014) [-]
One of the girls didn't really match with my taste in women. She was by no means ugly or anything; she has really bleached hair and I don't typically go for that. The other one has been on my radar for a while. In addition, I was a little on the drunk side.
Long story short, I dismissed two girls who wanted the D, because I didn't like one girl's hair
This is the moment I will look back to on my deathbed
Both of them fucking stuffed their hands down my pants and switched between making out with each other and me, so I'm pretty sure it was on. At least I got fondled by two girls simultaneously
#86 - kulamia (06/23/2014) [-]
Okay wait they were attempting to fuck you and YOU SAID NO!?!?! Dude if there's an afterlife you'll be taking that shit PAST the grave.

Goodluck man, I hope you get another chance with them.
User avatar
#73 - anusraper (06/23/2014) [-]
lol, "the hair didn't match" maybe she was a whale ?
User avatar
#85 - ebperik (06/23/2014) [-]
She isn't a whale, but there isn't any way I can prove anything
#33 - mrsecret (06/23/2014) [-]
just play mahvel instead.
User avatar
#15 - mrawesomepotato (06/22/2014) [-]
using both hands doesnt count
#14 - dethstryke (06/22/2014) [-]
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#75 - thorstoned (06/23/2014) [-]
Where's this from? I'll take the soup please.
#978281 - Meh, it's just a matter of taste 06/22/2014 on Video Games 0