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drtortuga    

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drtortuga Avatar Level 141 Comments: Faptastic
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Gender: female
Date Signed Up:9/28/2011
Last Login:4/22/2014
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Comment Ranking:#7356
Highest Content Rank:#1781
Highest Comment Rank:#7323
Content Thumbs: 3362 total,  3686 ,  324
Comment Thumbs: 465 total,  545 ,  80
Content Level Progress: 62% (62/100)
Level 133 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry → Level 134 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry
Comment Level Progress: 90% (9/10)
Level 141 Comments: Faptastic → Level 142 Comments: Faptastic
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Content Views:106881
Times Content Favorited:422 times
Total Comments Made:105
FJ Points:3804

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  • Views: 1257
    Thumbs Up 10 Thumbs Down 2 Total: +8
    Comments: 6
    Favorites: 2
    Uploaded: 09/28/11
    Y U So Meme? Y U So Meme?
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latest user's comments

#28 - Right?? I was seriously concerned for you. I'm glad to hear it…  [+] (1 new reply) 04/16/2014 on I never ment to hurt you +2
User avatar #29 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Well, have what I guess would constitute as a good rest of your day.

This never happened.
#26 - OH! Oh my god, I was so worried for you. Ok then, carry on.  [+] (3 new replies) 04/16/2014 on I never ment to hurt you +1
#27 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh dear god, just reading back that sounds like the worst experiance ever....
User avatar #28 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Right?? I was seriously concerned for you. I'm glad to hear it was just fapping related. Totally understandable.
User avatar #29 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Well, have what I guess would constitute as a good rest of your day.

This never happened.
#23 - Ah, nope. Definitely not right. If she's moistened up properly…  [+] (5 new replies) 04/16/2014 on I never ment to hurt you +1
User avatar #24 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh, I mean under his circumstances (see story above)
User avatar #26 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
OH! Oh my god, I was so worried for you. Ok then, carry on.
#27 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh dear god, just reading back that sounds like the worst experiance ever....
User avatar #28 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Right?? I was seriously concerned for you. I'm glad to hear it was just fapping related. Totally understandable.
User avatar #29 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Well, have what I guess would constitute as a good rest of your day.

This never happened.
#21 - What the hell. That is NOT supposed to happen. Are you having …  [+] (7 new replies) 04/16/2014 on I never ment to hurt you +4
User avatar #22 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Nope, just speed man. Friction can be a bitch.
User avatar #23 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Ah, nope. Definitely not right. If she's moistened up properly then there will be no painful friction. If there is friction, then you're giving her micro-tears, which are bad.
User avatar #24 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh, I mean under his circumstances (see story above)
User avatar #26 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
OH! Oh my god, I was so worried for you. Ok then, carry on.
#27 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh dear god, just reading back that sounds like the worst experiance ever....
User avatar #28 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Right?? I was seriously concerned for you. I'm glad to hear it was just fapping related. Totally understandable.
User avatar #29 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Well, have what I guess would constitute as a good rest of your day.

This never happened.
#12 - Oh wow. So does that mean real sex leaves men with some pain a…  [+] (15 new replies) 04/16/2014 on I never ment to hurt you 0
#36 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
Yeah, it can hurt a bit. This gif is a pretty good visual of how it feels. And if you just lie in your bed looking at some pretty ladies on the internet but keep edging... Well, you can get an orgasm that lasts entirely too long, and it's more hurty than fun. "STOP SPITTING YOU LITTLE BASTARD!" Same if you go for round 2 without even stopping. DOne that a couple of times, GF was like "can you FINISH sometime?" but it wasn't easy . I told her I always read about girls who have boyfriends that don't last long in bed and she should be grateful, hehe.

To answer your first question: Sometimes you just lie in your bed or on your couch, and have to scratch your balls. One thing leads to another, you don't have any tissues or such nearby and it's no fun to just stop to go to the bathroom.... And yeah. Cum on stomach, matrix walk to the bathroom to clean up. And it still drips on the floor.
User avatar #19 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Sometimes, when it goes too fast, the skin gets somewhat torn on the underside, and yeah.....not fun...
User avatar #63 - certifiedidiot (04/16/2014) [-]
I learned the hard way.. If your fingernails are getting a little too long, fucking clip them before you and fap at high speed.
#57 - adrianoc (04/16/2014) [-]
I'm not alone!? It's more of a frequency combined with friction problem though...
User avatar #21 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
What the hell. That is NOT supposed to happen. Are you having sex with sandpaper??
User avatar #22 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Nope, just speed man. Friction can be a bitch.
User avatar #23 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Ah, nope. Definitely not right. If she's moistened up properly then there will be no painful friction. If there is friction, then you're giving her micro-tears, which are bad.
User avatar #24 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh, I mean under his circumstances (see story above)
User avatar #26 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
OH! Oh my god, I was so worried for you. Ok then, carry on.
#27 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh dear god, just reading back that sounds like the worst experiance ever....
User avatar #28 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Right?? I was seriously concerned for you. I'm glad to hear it was just fapping related. Totally understandable.
User avatar #29 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Well, have what I guess would constitute as a good rest of your day.

This never happened.
#17 - hudge (04/16/2014) [-]
Usually, just a sore dick.
#14 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
Not entirely sure, being a virgin-anon. But i would guess it also differs from person to person. Maybe some other guys could chime in.
#15 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
*cough* could also be from over exertion. Kappa.
#7 - Why do guys come on their stomachs? I have a boyfriend and I h…  [+] (34 new replies) 04/16/2014 on I never ment to hurt you +12
User avatar #71 - ieatbengay (04/16/2014) [-]
if you're leaning back in a chair or lying down your not gonna be aiming forward now are you

you just try not to get it everywhere
#69 - spiedaspider (04/16/2014) [-]
why do dogs lick themselves?
User avatar #68 - schneidend (04/16/2014) [-]
I fire off my manbatter into the toilet.
#62 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
After the "in da face" incident, sure I use them
#60 - chaoticlaw (04/16/2014) [-]
I've never actually masturbated, so I have no idea.


The only time I have ever had my own cum make contact with some part of my body is usually during kinky sex stuff.
User avatar #51 - nimblewalrus (04/16/2014) [-]
I just shower afterwards.
User avatar #50 - limb (04/16/2014) [-]
I usually cum on tissue I hate when my cum goes places it shouldn't. Also I'm fat and it doesn't work well.
#38 - xcoreyx (04/16/2014) [-]
Well it's not easy to explain but I'll be damned if I'm not gonna try. It's somehow less pleasurable when you have to jizz into something. If you're doing it into a tissue (I've never understood the whole sock thing seems kinda nasty), then you have to aim and pay more attention to it. I mean you're jerking this thing around really fast and then all of a sudden you're climaxing and you don't wanna have to aim you just wanna let it go. So if you slouch down and just do it onto your stomach, you don't have to worry. Your stomach has a big enough area to catch it all, so you can just enjoy the orgasm without having to aim or worry about where it's gonna go, until after you're done.
User avatar #61 - cormy (04/16/2014) [-]
I stopped cumming on my stomach when I started shooting myself in the face.
It's not pleasant.
User avatar #39 - avarius (04/16/2014) [-]
Well, it's not like you don't wash the sock before you put it on the next time
at least I hope that others don't do that
User avatar #37 - sardinez (04/16/2014) [-]
do you think your boyfriend is gonna tell you or sum shit? 'hey babe just came on my belly button xoxo thinking of u'
#31 - faperto (04/16/2014) [-]
we like it hot
#13 - bitchpleaseshutup (04/16/2014) [-]
Fetishes? no homo
User avatar #52 - darkangeloffire (04/16/2014) [-]
It saddens me at the lack of Shauna R34 out there
#25 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
sauce
#11 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
Well, sometimes the tissues won't stop everything. Coming into something also seems to trigger a more powerful orgasm which can leave you with some residual pain in the testes.
User avatar #12 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh wow. So does that mean real sex leaves men with some pain afterwards? I know that they're super sensitive right after, but I didn't know they suffered from recoil pains.
#36 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
Yeah, it can hurt a bit. This gif is a pretty good visual of how it feels. And if you just lie in your bed looking at some pretty ladies on the internet but keep edging... Well, you can get an orgasm that lasts entirely too long, and it's more hurty than fun. "STOP SPITTING YOU LITTLE BASTARD!" Same if you go for round 2 without even stopping. DOne that a couple of times, GF was like "can you FINISH sometime?" but it wasn't easy . I told her I always read about girls who have boyfriends that don't last long in bed and she should be grateful, hehe.

To answer your first question: Sometimes you just lie in your bed or on your couch, and have to scratch your balls. One thing leads to another, you don't have any tissues or such nearby and it's no fun to just stop to go to the bathroom.... And yeah. Cum on stomach, matrix walk to the bathroom to clean up. And it still drips on the floor.
User avatar #19 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Sometimes, when it goes too fast, the skin gets somewhat torn on the underside, and yeah.....not fun...
User avatar #63 - certifiedidiot (04/16/2014) [-]
I learned the hard way.. If your fingernails are getting a little too long, fucking clip them before you and fap at high speed.
#57 - adrianoc (04/16/2014) [-]
I'm not alone!? It's more of a frequency combined with friction problem though...
User avatar #21 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
What the hell. That is NOT supposed to happen. Are you having sex with sandpaper??
User avatar #22 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Nope, just speed man. Friction can be a bitch.
User avatar #23 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Ah, nope. Definitely not right. If she's moistened up properly then there will be no painful friction. If there is friction, then you're giving her micro-tears, which are bad.
User avatar #24 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh, I mean under his circumstances (see story above)
User avatar #26 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
OH! Oh my god, I was so worried for you. Ok then, carry on.
#27 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Oh dear god, just reading back that sounds like the worst experiance ever....
User avatar #28 - drtortuga (04/16/2014) [-]
Right?? I was seriously concerned for you. I'm glad to hear it was just fapping related. Totally understandable.
User avatar #29 - whenindoubtsplooge (04/16/2014) [-]
Well, have what I guess would constitute as a good rest of your day.

This never happened.
#17 - hudge (04/16/2014) [-]
Usually, just a sore dick.
#14 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
Not entirely sure, being a virgin-anon. But i would guess it also differs from person to person. Maybe some other guys could chime in.
#15 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
*cough* could also be from over exertion. Kappa.
#10 - anonymous (04/16/2014) [-]
"Cause we're just that lazy
#60 - I was bullied alot growing up, to the point that in 7th grade …  [+] (2 new replies) 04/15/2014 on untitled +5
User avatar #88 - theawesomestperson (04/15/2014) [-]
Hey, I had that sort of experience. When I was a kid, I lived in America and although I wasn't the most popular kid, I had friends. But then I moved to Ireland, and I went from being liked to basically being hated. I was loud, obnoxious and headstrong, and the quiet little Irish kids couldn't deal with me. So they bullied me, which made me worse.

It finally dawned on me that I was making it worse. I toned it down, I stopped forcing them to let me play in their games and slowly, the bullying stopped. I'm actually very close friends with one of the girls who used to bully me.

Yeah, it was horrible, but without being bullied, I wouldn't be the person I am today, so I would never change what happened to me.
#80 - anonymous (04/15/2014) [-]
Thank you for posting that comment.
#58 - Comment deleted 04/15/2014 on untitled +1
#109 - Well just shove it up your ******* ASS.  [+] (4 new replies) 04/07/2014 on Anon Life Lessons +4
User avatar #114 - Malchow (04/07/2014) [-]
"You claim to have issues understanding and dealing with women, but when a girl calmly and thoughtfully discuss issues with you"

That's quoted directly from you. Do I need to spell out what's wrong here?
User avatar #116 - blastedbeet (04/07/2014) [-]
No, I will. She tried being civil far longer than she should have, you refused to acknowledge that, and she went off on you. The whole "multiple horribly failed relationships" thing makes a whole lot more sense now. No wonder women hate you. You present yourself as a pretty shitty person. Hope all that bitterness can keep you warm, because you've got a lot of cold, lonely nights ahead. And hey, it probably will put off some heat for a while. But then it'll be gone, and you'll be a charred husk of a man, flaking away bit by bit into a breeze that doesn't know or care about you
User avatar #120 - Malchow (04/07/2014) [-]
I never said anything about horribly failed relationships. That was an assumption on your parts. As it so happens, none of the accusers were in relationships with me. In fact, two of them barely even knew me from a hole in the wall, not that it stopped them.

The shaming language is a nice touch, though. Poetic, even. Unfortunately for you, you're trying to shame me by suggesting I won't get something I don't even want to begin with.
#175 - anonymous (04/07/2014) [-]
you are literally the worst kind of person
#108 - Alright. I'm done discussing this with you. I disagree with li…  [+] (1 new reply) 04/07/2014 on Anon Life Lessons +4
User avatar #110 - Malchow (04/07/2014) [-]
An opportunity for what, precisely? There are numerous women in my personal life who have heard and understand my stance. You are not special.
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