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Date Signed Up:8/10/2012
FunnyJunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#7296
Highest Content Rank:#2311
Highest Comment Rank:#3260
Content Thumbs: 2549 total,  2816 ,  267
Comment Thumbs: 1457 total,  1582 ,  125
Content Level Progress: 15% (15/100)
Level 123 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry → Level 124 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry
Comment Level Progress: 22% (22/100)
Level 212 Comments: Comedic Genius → Level 213 Comments: Comedic Genius
Content Views:98939
Times Content Favorited:75 times
Total Comments Made:252
FJ Points:3510

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latest user's comments

#36 - bro 08/22/2016 on gold 0
#29 - Clearly fake because everyone didn't clap 08/21/2016 on This Mom is Golden -1
#76 - Impressive!! Now land.  [+] (1 new reply) 08/21/2016 on Homemade flying motorboat +2
#88 - anon (08/21/2016) [-]
who cares about land when you live in place of paradise islands
#75 - Picture 08/21/2016 on Homemade flying motorboat +10
#48 - There's a difference between actively encouraging (sometimes a… 08/21/2016 on Carny Stories +2
#52 - Picture  [+] (3 new replies) 08/20/2016 on yo mamma jokes +18
#101 - dassasofunny (08/20/2016) [-]
i think i went overkill
User avatar
#63 - itssakamoto (08/20/2016) [-]
looks like I triggered 26 people and their moms
User avatar
#69 - smartythechicken (08/20/2016) [-]
26 people
assuming they all have one momma, thats 26*1=26 moms
we all know that: Yo mama so fat that she (insert size comparison)
yo mommma so fat her size is theoretical
lets say that each mommma is so fat that they each cant fit in the universe, resulting in a cataclysmic black hole that would expand beyond the multiverse, sucking everything the same way they used to suck dicks to conceive their 26 children. The event horizon would be so large that you wouldnt be able to see it because the entire multiverse, and every single universe within the multiverse, have already become engulfed in 26 yo mamas.

still not as fat as yo momma
#79 - Well of course. The snail wars were so horrific and violent th…  [+] (3 new replies) 07/28/2016 on Fact Comp #3 AM Edition +20
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#111 - melwach (07/28/2016) [-]
I've been to the outskirts of Münster lately and as it happens I spoke to a farmer's family that lives in the area since generations. Funny that I read about it on Funnyjunk, because I just recently talked about snails with those folks.

The men that fought these abhorrent creatures rarely where able to continue their duties, because of what we would nowadays call severe cases of ptsd. So they where given to the quiet and shelter of cloisters where those often educated knights should find peace of mind in simple, yet blessed tasks like copying bibles and other books. Some men where able to forget. Others..well.
There is an ancient manuscript, that tells of one particular evening in the Gottlieb cloister in Münster, Germany, where the monks forced their entry into one of those knight's cell after the man had disappeared without a trace before morning prayer.
The whole room was full of snail drawings. The walls, the ceiling. Spirals where carved into the lone chair and table and the bedposts aswell. The ground littered with the empty houses of a smaller snail variety. The puzzled brothers could only guess their grim origin. And so ends the trace of Hugo von Schneck, who is thought to be the author of at least a couple of the surviving depictions in various scripture.
#139 - anon (07/28/2016) [-]
what the fuck
#84 - lollypopalopicus (07/28/2016) [-]
And you dishonour them by making it known! For shame!

In all seriousness though, I hope this comment gets many likes. It made me smile, and deserves it.
#53 - >"Lol, genuinely funny and creative comment +1" …  [+] (1 new reply) 07/17/2016 on "I want your body" part 2 +1
#55 - wiseagain (07/17/2016) [-]
Thank you~
#70 - Picture 07/09/2016 on Cittact Biveshil Ysaloons 0
#8 - I spent longer than I would care to admit trying to read that … 07/07/2016 on We ditch the whole scene +14
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