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coolnerd    

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coolnerd Avatar Level 214 Comments: Comedic Genius
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Date Signed Up:7/21/2011
Last Login:10/22/2014
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Comment Ranking:#3561
Highest Content Rank:#2127
Highest Comment Rank:#3546
Content Thumbs: 1996 total,  2322 ,  326
Comment Thumbs: 1629 total,  1910 ,  281
Content Level Progress: 84% (84/100)
Level 116 Content: Funny Junkie → Level 117 Content: Funny Junkie
Comment Level Progress: 43% (43/100)
Level 214 Comments: Comedic Genius → Level 215 Comments: Comedic Genius
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Content Views:106067
Times Content Favorited:107 times
Total Comments Made:509
FJ Points:3223
Favorite Tags: dont (2) | gf (2) | your (2)

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    Good Morning Feel Good Morning Feel
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    Beauty and the Beat Beauty and the Beat
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    So Obama won. So Obama won.
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    Zelda 2 Zelda 2
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#1078538 - Fish cleaner greets me. To my disappointment, I cannot trade t… 10/21/2014 on Video Games Board - console... 0
#1078533 - Aim at lower body with punch. I charged him from…  [+] (1 new reply) 10/21/2014 on Video Games Board - console... 0
User avatar #1078538 - coolnerd (10/21/2014) [-]
Fish cleaner greets me. To my disappointment, I cannot trade the corpse. I proceed to call him a child of the night, he tells me to chill my shit.

Tell him to yield, he says you first, coward! I respond, "At least it doesn't rain down here."
Trying to figure out how to drop the corpse. Got it. Proceed to draw axe and shield.

Attack with axe, she jumps away. It’s a she.
Chase her around with the axe; manage to sever her left hand and upper left back teeth.

I lodge the iron battle axe into her lower body, and have to spend a moment to pull it out. A spinning strike separates her head from her shoulders.

I pick up her head and store it in my backpack. Make a campfire on her corpse.

I shift T to travel, where the hell am I? Found a giant toad near a stream or some other water source. Lots of walls around.

Giant toad is wrecking my absolute shit. I accidentally drop into the water, and the toad spends the next several minutes biting into every part of my body, starting from the leg and going up bit by bit. It is merciless as it goes at my head. I bled to death before I drowned.

Going through the announcements, it was an expansive cavern deep underground.
Damn that traveling messed me up.

I have still no idea how I was supposed to leave that first area. 9/10 Enjoyable, if confusing experience. Will play again.
#1078529 - I am Iton alakcatten, "Iton Acechannels". I worship …  [+] (2 new replies) 10/21/2014 on Video Games Board - console... 0
#1078533 - coolnerd (10/21/2014) [-]
Aim at lower body with punch.

I charged him from behind; he's surprised at my ferocity. We collide and tumble together.

Minkot bolts after recovering. I’m apparently much, much slower then him. Can’t catch up

Found out why, was crawling on ground.

Catch up to him, throw copper dagger.

The spinning blade catches him in the leg, tearing apart the muscle and bruising bone. Slit an artery, severed a sensory nerve, and tore a ligament and a tendon.
He falls.

I punch his left ear, and the injured part collapses. I grab his neck with my right hand.

Try to punch him in head, we miss each other. I scratch his toe nail, he breaks my grip.

Apparently I hate his foot, I keep attacking it.

I hit his head hard with my right hand, knocking him unconscious. Proceed to chokehold him with left hand. Just my hand?

I bite into his neck, latching on. Start to shake, tearing open an artery.
Thoroughly enjoying this.

I have now suffocated him. Blood all around us. I pick up my dagger, and decide to carry his corpse around.
User avatar #1078538 - coolnerd (10/21/2014) [-]
Fish cleaner greets me. To my disappointment, I cannot trade the corpse. I proceed to call him a child of the night, he tells me to chill my shit.

Tell him to yield, he says you first, coward! I respond, "At least it doesn't rain down here."
Trying to figure out how to drop the corpse. Got it. Proceed to draw axe and shield.

Attack with axe, she jumps away. It’s a she.
Chase her around with the axe; manage to sever her left hand and upper left back teeth.

I lodge the iron battle axe into her lower body, and have to spend a moment to pull it out. A spinning strike separates her head from her shoulders.

I pick up her head and store it in my backpack. Make a campfire on her corpse.

I shift T to travel, where the hell am I? Found a giant toad near a stream or some other water source. Lots of walls around.

Giant toad is wrecking my absolute shit. I accidentally drop into the water, and the toad spends the next several minutes biting into every part of my body, starting from the leg and going up bit by bit. It is merciless as it goes at my head. I bled to death before I drowned.

Going through the announcements, it was an expansive cavern deep underground.
Damn that traveling messed me up.

I have still no idea how I was supposed to leave that first area. 9/10 Enjoyable, if confusing experience. Will play again.
#1078527 - As very few people remember, i posted here that i was going to…  [+] (3 new replies) 10/21/2014 on Video Games Board - console... 0
User avatar #1078529 - coolnerd (10/21/2014) [-]
I am Iton alakcatten, "Iton Acechannels". I worship Laltur, the god of children, family, marriage, oaths and loyalty

I am a fortress guard of the great Solon Theatherfleshy in Lashedwhipped. Theaterfleshy in lashedwhipped? Goodness this town is going to die soon.

'A foolhardy soul might try to rescue the children that have been kidnapped. Perhaps you friend here have ideas.' I have friends? Progress already made.

Gain access to map. Already pressed 'D' key to move right, opening a menu instead. Damn you muscle memory.

I have discovered the right keypad.

Start talking to laltur. Inquire about any troubles. No response. Try again.

Apparently, Laltur doesn't want to fucking talk.

Shout out to everyone instead. Minkot responds hey good to see you, don't travel at night 'cause bogeyman.

Minkot’s youngest son got kidnapped years back. I offer condolences. His response, 'it is terrifying'

Tells me of his uncle getting kidnapped. I tell him it is for the best.

I now pay attention and remember that Laltur is the Deity. No wonder.

Unable to find my way out of this set of rooms I spawned in. Considering attacking Minkot.

Decide to fight. Hoping I will be moved elsewhere when he dies.
#1078533 - coolnerd (10/21/2014) [-]
Aim at lower body with punch.

I charged him from behind; he's surprised at my ferocity. We collide and tumble together.

Minkot bolts after recovering. I’m apparently much, much slower then him. Can’t catch up

Found out why, was crawling on ground.

Catch up to him, throw copper dagger.

The spinning blade catches him in the leg, tearing apart the muscle and bruising bone. Slit an artery, severed a sensory nerve, and tore a ligament and a tendon.
He falls.

I punch his left ear, and the injured part collapses. I grab his neck with my right hand.

Try to punch him in head, we miss each other. I scratch his toe nail, he breaks my grip.

Apparently I hate his foot, I keep attacking it.

I hit his head hard with my right hand, knocking him unconscious. Proceed to chokehold him with left hand. Just my hand?

I bite into his neck, latching on. Start to shake, tearing open an artery.
Thoroughly enjoying this.

I have now suffocated him. Blood all around us. I pick up my dagger, and decide to carry his corpse around.
User avatar #1078538 - coolnerd (10/21/2014) [-]
Fish cleaner greets me. To my disappointment, I cannot trade the corpse. I proceed to call him a child of the night, he tells me to chill my shit.

Tell him to yield, he says you first, coward! I respond, "At least it doesn't rain down here."
Trying to figure out how to drop the corpse. Got it. Proceed to draw axe and shield.

Attack with axe, she jumps away. It’s a she.
Chase her around with the axe; manage to sever her left hand and upper left back teeth.

I lodge the iron battle axe into her lower body, and have to spend a moment to pull it out. A spinning strike separates her head from her shoulders.

I pick up her head and store it in my backpack. Make a campfire on her corpse.

I shift T to travel, where the hell am I? Found a giant toad near a stream or some other water source. Lots of walls around.

Giant toad is wrecking my absolute shit. I accidentally drop into the water, and the toad spends the next several minutes biting into every part of my body, starting from the leg and going up bit by bit. It is merciless as it goes at my head. I bled to death before I drowned.

Going through the announcements, it was an expansive cavern deep underground.
Damn that traveling messed me up.

I have still no idea how I was supposed to leave that first area. 9/10 Enjoyable, if confusing experience. Will play again.
#66 - such was my worry. Glad another person saw/thought of it too. 10/21/2014 on pimps of the hood 0
#19 - As i read this for the 3rd time, i made a new discovery about …  [+] (2 new replies) 10/21/2014 on pimps of the hood +10
User avatar #60 - ieatbengay (10/21/2014) [-]
it was probably a deliberate typo to seem more tumblr-ish, they use deliberate caps half way through a word and use wrong grammer just to seem cool infront of the other 15 year old girls
User avatar #66 - coolnerd (10/21/2014) [-]
such was my worry. Glad another person saw/thought of it too.
#56 - Picture 10/17/2014 on Oh yes 0
#13 - short explanation: Not really a cat, is loli-girl with dream a…  [+] (2 new replies) 10/16/2014 on Oh yes 0
User avatar #32 - droitesorel (10/16/2014) [-]
I would have preferred the cat to a loli-witch-bitch.
#56 - coolnerd (10/17/2014) [-]
#40 - **coolnerd rolled image ** great, more awesome … 10/15/2014 on The art of burning 0
#1071895 - I have loads of patience, so once this initial run is over i'l… 10/12/2014 on Video Games Board - console... 0

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User avatar #1 - torexofthenight (09/05/2012) [-]
Thanks for the support, got a lot more support here on FJ then I was expecting....lol
User avatar #2 to #1 - coolnerd (09/05/2012) [-]
Believe me, its my pleasure.
Considering the majority of funnyjunk's attitude about things, its not necessarily that they agreed with you (more than plenty of atheists here) but that the ones arguing with you were basically using the "You're wrong" argument instead of the "You're wrong and here's why" type, and they respect that you gave valid reasons for your beliefs.
User avatar #3 to #2 - torexofthenight (09/05/2012) [-]
Yeah, or the fact I posted a GIF they happened to like lol.
User avatar #4 to #3 - coolnerd (09/05/2012) [-]
well, no doubt it helped get their attention haha. But you followed it with a solid argument, a personal and true example.
User avatar #5 to #4 - torexofthenight (09/05/2012) [-]
Thank you though, I truly expected a flood of red thumbs when I posted that lol.
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