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Age: 29
Date Signed Up:6/16/2011
Last Login:7/26/2016
Location:Racine WI
FunnyJunk Career Stats
Content Ranking:#1269
Comment Ranking:#3588
Highest Content Rank:#613
Highest Comment Rank:#1303
Content Thumbs: 12348 total,  14400 ,  2052
Comment Thumbs: 3267 total,  3773 ,  506
Content Level Progress: 19% (19/100)
Level 205 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 206 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 85% (85/100)
Level 225 Comments: Mind Blower → Level 226 Comments: Mind Blower
Content Views:472017
Times Content Favorited:487 times
Total Comments Made:1060
FJ Points:12982
Favorite Tags: game (12) | The Game (11) | the (8) | The Game the (4) | Awesome (3) | funny (3) | Jr (2)
what color is a mirror

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    Like what? Like what?
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    cheese puff cheese puff
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    Nyan Nyan
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    Caillou in the bath (read desc) Caillou in the bath (read desc)
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    Postal 2 Postal 2

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latest user's comments

#158 - **boboroad used "*roll picture*"** **boboroad rolled image ** 6 hours ago on Press button, receive food 0
#77 - cannibalism 6 hours ago on Press button, receive food +1
#68 - **boboroad used "*roll picture*"** **boboroad rolled image ** 6 hours ago on Press button, receive food 0
#3 - beautiful 19 hours ago on where do you stand? 0
#51 - beastality 07/25/2016 on Quit your shit and feed me,... 0
#20 - plumber 07/24/2016 on Funny electrical meme 0
#1 - Picture  [+] (57 new replies) 07/23/2016 on "I like space and shit." +155
User avatar
#19 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
*Our galaxy contains every football pitch in the universe.
User avatar
#88 - steampoweredbot (07/24/2016) [-]
When did you decide to wage war on fun?
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#90 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
I told one joke and got fucked for it.
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#91 - steampoweredbot (07/24/2016) [-]
Did it buy you dinner first, at least?
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#92 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
#75 - anon (07/24/2016) [-]
for a dude who readily believes he's a girl, you sure are a bit of a stick in the mud about the possibilities of the universe.
User avatar
#76 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
I never made any claims about possibility.
#54 - anon (07/24/2016) [-]
Man, way to kill a joke. Like seriously.
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#55 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
>I was making a joke.
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#62 - buddywuggle (07/24/2016) [-]
Nutons 1th law of humor. One cannot make a joke without destroying a joke.
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#63 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
You're a joke Seriously though it's FunnyJunk not ButthurtJunk.
User avatar
#67 - buddywuggle (07/24/2016) [-]
Meh, If someone doesn't understand your jokes, it's nothing to get riled over. I'm honestly surprised this thread got so big.
User avatar
#68 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
It's not as big as my dick tho. People get upset when they don't understand something.
#95 - anon (07/25/2016) [-]
Yet you continued to comment, who's upset now?
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#96 - platinumaltaria (07/25/2016) [-]
You are, for failing to get a rise out of me ;)
#21 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
you dont know that
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#22 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Yes I do. Humans invented football, and humans exist on exactly one planet. Since the rest of the universe is rather lacking in the humans department I'd say it's pretty certain.
#39 - kamion (07/24/2016) [-]
I just want to ask you a question, a simple question.
When you saw that picture by boboroad, how did you not understand that it was a simple joke, made to mock the "entire football field" trend in measuring stuff. In what world do you live in, where someone would seriously say "Our galaxy alone could fit an entire football field".
Even when you wrote your stupid response and this kweel guy started poking fun at you, you still didn't get any of it, just continued with your dumb ranting about how the universe is, in fact and contrary to popular belief, bigger than a football stadium.

So I guess my question is, what universe, dimension or plane of existence do you live in? Cause it sure as hell ain't this one.
User avatar
#40 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
I just want to ask you a question; how did you not also realise that I was joking too? Like seriously, what exactly about my comment looks in any way like a serious remark?
#41 - kamion (07/24/2016) [-]
The dislikes
User avatar
#42 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Yeah, there's half a dozen people circlejerking about how stupid I am, failing to make the tiny jump to "oh wait maybe it's a joke".
#47 - traitorking (07/24/2016) [-]
I get you.
#48 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Oh baby I love it when you get me
#50 - traitorking (07/24/2016) [-]
Oh dear, I wasn't prepared for this.
#51 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Have a slippery tube dude meme and get out of my face.
#43 - kamion (07/24/2016) [-]
Well, it's an unfortunate side effect of making ambiguous jokes, sometimes people don't get them, nothing you can do about it.
User avatar
#44 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Well I used to just label every time a statement was a joke, because apparently even when you put 'funny' in the URL people take shit seriously.
#24 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
how do you know that the rest of the universe is lacking in the humans department? The universe is so fucking huge that it's not impossible that humans couldve evolved on another planet and there invented football.
#77 - unihornupmyass (07/24/2016) [-]
If there was football in a another galaxy i think a more likely explanation would be that aliens abducted humans and left them on some habitable planet and after surviving the humans decided to play football.

The existence of aliens is very likely according to scientists, wether they are just animals or highly evolved beings. Why they would dick around with humans, i dont know. Penis envy probably.
#79 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
Yeah that's more probable. Well considering how huge the universe is and how long it has existed I'd say assuming we are alone or have always been alone would be rather foolish.

Hah yeah fuck dem space boys be jelly
User avatar
#25 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
The "drake fallacy" is my favourite: "The universe is so big that X must be somewhere".

Humans evolved on earth to deal with earth's environment. Football is basically the result of random chance, the statistical likelihood of football coming up again even on earth is basically zero. And fyi there is no evidence to indicate that life exists outside of earth, so claiming it does is ridiculous.
#49 - smudgiemuffins (07/24/2016) [-]
I agree with your sentiment that people seem far too willing to accept life elsewhere in the universe, but you're using a similar false logic to assert the non-existence of football somewhere else in the universe.

What do you mean the odds of football coming up again is basically 0? How did you calculate those odds? I'm going to assume you didn't survey planets across the universe to check if they had football, so you probably need some fancy math-y statistical models to come to such a number.

My point is that probability is not a good argument if all you have is intuition. That is precisely why "the universe is so big, what are the odds there isn't life somewhere else?" is a bad argument because I have absolutely no idea what the probability of life developing on any particular planet is.

Of course I'm not trying to assert there is in fact football somewhere else in the universe. Even if it seems silly, I'm saying that I'm not even sure how I'd go about answering that question. And if you have a method, I'd like to hear it.
User avatar
#53 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
I'm talking about football occurring on earth: same people, same history; what's the probability of the same game coming up. The answer is not high, football's history is pretty random, as made clear by the dozens of other games it has produced.

In general football is defined as "kick ball into goal", but beyond that there are so many variables that could change: the size and shape of the pitch, goal or ball, the number of players, the playing field's material etc. Any change like this produces a different game, only one of which is football.
#57 - smudgiemuffins (07/24/2016) [-]
Your scenario doesn't make sense. If it was the same people with the same history, the probability is precisely 1. Football's history might be random in the colloquial sense, but it's not random in the technical sense. To meaningfully discuss probability, you need to vary your sample space.

Furthermore, if you're going to consider football a different game as a result of any variation, then football could only have ever been played once. No ball has ever been precisely the same weight nor has any medal been made of exactly the same material. You'll have to come up with some range of variance of things that can be meaningfully called football if you want to frame your argument this way.
User avatar
#58 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
If I make the pitch a foot longer it's not the same game, right? The rules clearly specify pitch size, which is technically an arbitrary value, therefore a field a foot longer is not a football pitch...
#59 - smudgiemuffins (07/24/2016) [-]
You didn't answer either of my questions. To what accuracy must my pitch meet the specifications before it's no longer a football pitch? Must it be exact? Because in that case, only one game of football could ever have been played.

And again, your scenario suggests that the probability is exactly 1 that humans develop football as the size of your sample space is 1. It doesn't really matter how we define football if the circumstances under which it develops are completely unchanged.
User avatar
#60 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Now you're just being silly. The rules define the size of the pitch, not the pitches themselves. If the rules of extraterrestrial limb-orb say a different value then it's a different game.
#64 - smudgiemuffins (07/24/2016) [-]
How am I being silly? You said that you knew what the probability of football developing on Earth and you wont even tell me what football is. I'm being a pedant because you made a claim worthy of pedantry. Probability is not just a feeling, it's a mathematical concept. Precision is not optional.

My point is that your claim that the probability of football developing is very low is totally meaningless is football is a nebulously defined concept. You're making an argument analogous to those who argue that life exists somewhere else in the universe based on a hunch.

And I still don't understand how your scenario doesn't make the probability of football being developed exactly 1. What can vary if history is the exact same?
User avatar
#65 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Did I claim to know the probability? No, I said it was low, which I'm pretty sure most people will agree on.

I'm tired of this, do whatever.
#69 - smudgiemuffins (07/24/2016) [-]
What an incredibly anti-intellectual response. Don't try and show off with your supposed scientific knowledge and then throw a fit when you're challenged. Keep your opinions to yourself if you don't want to discuss them.
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#70 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Oh my god just admit you were wrong already. I never said the thing you claimed I did, so fuck right off.

I never claimed to have any knowledge about anything, read my comments again and tell me where exactly I said what you claim. I'll wait here. Meanwhile consider taking your own advice; don't throw a fit when someone challenges you. Good day.
#80 - vozel (07/24/2016) [-]
>oh my god just admit you were wrong already

That's it, smudgiemuffins. He's begging you to admit defeat. He asked for it, you got to do it so you don't hurt his feelings. He's got you real good, boy
#71 - smudgiemuffins (07/24/2016) [-]
"the statistical likelihood of football coming up again even on earth is basically zero"

Also "just admit you were wrong" is some off the charts rhetorical skills.
User avatar
#72 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Basically zero =/= zero
Come on, you're apparently great at maths, surely you could have figured out that "basically zero" is a way of saying "very low".

Suit yourself, I'm done arguing with you about a point I never made.
#73 - smudgiemuffins (07/24/2016) [-]
I thought you were done arguing a few comments ago. To be honest, I engaged you in a conversation because you seemed pretty level headed and willing to discuss an interesting concept. Oops, I guess. But if you just admitted you were wrong, I'd forgive you.

If you assert that a probability is very low, you must have at least an upper bound. One that you've yet to provide me.
#26 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
but you can't prove that, that is the point
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#27 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
I can't prove that the inside of the moon isn't molten cheese, it's still not true.
#29 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
I said you don't know, because you don't know. Most likely no there are no other humans or any football fields, but you can't possibly know that. Which was the point
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#30 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
But don't you see that that's an unfalsifiable hypothesis? It's illogical to assume that it's true, therefore we remain with the default position; that it's false, which is apparent based on current observations. The instant you find a football field in another galaxy I'll secede the point, but until then you're being silly.
#31 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
The absense of evidence is not the evidence of absence, I don't believe that there are football fields or humans in the universe besides from earth but I don't have proof therefore I can't say it isn't true. Claiming you know without having proof is ridicolous that is all
User avatar
#32 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Apparently absence of evidence is evidence of existence to you...

If I enter a room and see no ham, it is logical to say "there is no ham in this room". If I proceed to search the room for any signs of ham and find none it is logical to say "there is no ham in this room". According to you the logical thing to say is "there might be ham in this room", despite having found no indication of ham.
#34 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
Not really, I assume that there are no humans in the universe besides from us, but I also accept the possiblilty that there could be some. There is no need to close your mind just because you think you are sure of something. You could always be wrong, that is all
#45 - anon (07/24/2016) [-]
your're wrong, lmao
User avatar
#35 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
Obligatory "open mind"
My mind is open only to things that make themselves apparent. The existence of testicle dwarfs is completely possible, however they do not exist.

I very well could be proven wrong, there could be an intergalactic football association. But there's no evidence to believe it, and based on our understanding of how football came to be it seems completely obvious that it is an earth thing.
#36 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
Yeah I'm just saying you don't know, you might be logically correct but that is all and you can't prove me otherwise. And that is all? I am not arguing that it exists all I say is you can't possibly know for sure. Just understand I've tried to explain too many times now
User avatar
#37 - platinumaltaria (07/24/2016) [-]
I'm not contesting that I could be proven wrong at a later date, I'm not concerned about possibility.
#38 - kweel (07/24/2016) [-]
Yeah well my only point was that you couldn't know for sure that there are none, but you read into it to much arguing as if I believed there was other humans and football fields. Which I don't
#4 - thought it was slightly relevant 07/23/2016 on u r a gewd boi +6
#18 - sure  [+] (1 new reply) 07/22/2016 on races 0
#19 - puttman (07/23/2016) [-]
#2 - Obama : There's a pikachu nearby! Biden : Get your phone, …  [+] (2 new replies) 07/22/2016 on this is what real... +238
#49 - fffffffuuuuuuuuuuu (07/22/2016) [-]
I have too much free time on my hands.
#11 - jdizzleoffthehizzl (07/22/2016) [-]
Are they at prom or something?
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