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Sexysammich

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Date Signed Up:8/09/2010
Last Login:3/05/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#7475
Highest Content Rank:#540
Highest Comment Rank:#2701
Content Thumbs: 11298 total,  13048 ,  1750
Comment Thumbs: 4798 total,  5712 ,  914
Content Level Progress: 55.8% (279/500)
Level 210 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 211 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 82% (82/100)
Level 245 Comments: Doinitrite → Level 246 Comments: Doinitrite
Subscribers:7
Content Views:121377
Times Content Favorited:595 times
Total Comments Made:1429
FJ Points:15866
Favorite Tags: fap fap fap (3)

Funny Text/Links

Funny Pictures

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    Uploaded: 07/18/11
    I have a trolldad I have a trolldad
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    Uploaded: 08/02/11
    Space Sharks Space Sharks
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    Idiots Idiots
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    Uploaded: 07/15/11
    Biggest Badass in history Biggest Badass in history
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    Uploaded: 06/24/12
    Dickinson Dickinson
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    Uploaded: 03/15/12
    Gays Gays
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YouTube Videos

latest user's comments

#98 - A few nights ago I woke up very briefly to roll over and I not… 7 hours ago on I really did! +2
#121 - Do you remember my ass?  [+] (1 new reply) 7 hours ago on The FunnyJunk Community... +1
User avatar #128 - hankhillofthe (6 hours ago) [-]
never forghetti
#46 - joshlol  [+] (1 new reply) 7 hours ago on I let Joshlol send custom... 0
User avatar #64 - joshlol (2 hours ago) [-]
hi
#1742 - What the **** kind of monster do you think I am? … 15 hours ago on Hook up with an FJer 0
#1736 - i am ananimus. im leegon. u shudv accepted me  [+] (2 new replies) 15 hours ago on Hook up with an FJer 0
User avatar #1738 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Don't tell my mom
User avatar #1742 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
What the fuck kind of monster do you think I am?

I wouldn't dream of doing something so vile.
#1713 - I am OP. Why would I lie about this?  [+] (4 new replies) 15 hours ago on Hook up with an FJer 0
User avatar #1732 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Please don't hurt me mr 4chin man.
User avatar #1736 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
i am ananimus. im leegon. u shudv accepted me
User avatar #1738 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Don't tell my mom
User avatar #1742 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
What the fuck kind of monster do you think I am?

I wouldn't dream of doing something so vile.
#1701 - What the **** did you just ******* s…  [+] (6 new replies) 15 hours ago on Hook up with an FJer +1
User avatar #1707 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
You won't scare me with your copypasta.

I saw it once while browsing 4chins.
User avatar #1713 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
I am OP. Why would I lie about this?
User avatar #1732 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Please don't hurt me mr 4chin man.
User avatar #1736 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
i am ananimus. im leegon. u shudv accepted me
User avatar #1738 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Don't tell my mom
User avatar #1742 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
What the fuck kind of monster do you think I am?

I wouldn't dream of doing something so vile.
#1689 - u tryna start **** m8  [+] (8 new replies) 15 hours ago on Hook up with an FJer 0
User avatar #1697 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Yeah m8 keep talkin' about how good you are at vidya games and I'll hook you in the gabber.
User avatar #1701 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
User avatar #1707 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
You won't scare me with your copypasta.

I saw it once while browsing 4chins.
User avatar #1713 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
I am OP. Why would I lie about this?
User avatar #1732 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Please don't hurt me mr 4chin man.
User avatar #1736 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
i am ananimus. im leegon. u shudv accepted me
User avatar #1738 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Don't tell my mom
User avatar #1742 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
What the fuck kind of monster do you think I am?

I wouldn't dream of doing something so vile.
#1663 - I can get down a black diamond moderately quickly on my board.…  [+] (10 new replies) 15 hours ago on Hook up with an FJer 0
User avatar #1686 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Hockey games are the only sports games worth playing anyways.
User avatar #1689 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
u tryna start shit m8
User avatar #1697 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Yeah m8 keep talkin' about how good you are at vidya games and I'll hook you in the gabber.
User avatar #1701 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
User avatar #1707 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
You won't scare me with your copypasta.

I saw it once while browsing 4chins.
User avatar #1713 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
I am OP. Why would I lie about this?
User avatar #1732 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Please don't hurt me mr 4chin man.
User avatar #1736 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
i am ananimus. im leegon. u shudv accepted me
User avatar #1738 - rplix (15 hours ago) [-]
Don't tell my mom
User avatar #1742 - Sexysammich (15 hours ago) [-]
What the fuck kind of monster do you think I am?

I wouldn't dream of doing something so vile.
#31 - That's fried chicken you stupid ******* 02/27/2015 on 99 cents +1

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User avatar #6 - Byte ONLINE (06/21/2014) [-]
Sexysammich. Now that's yummy.
Drop that baggy, and we'll get you in my tummy.
My mouth is wet just thinking about you.
Bet you can't wait for me to chew..
User avatar #7 to #6 - Sexysammich (06/21/2014) [-]
Oh dear Christ. I love you.
#8 to #7 - Byte ONLINE (06/21/2014) [-]
Oh you.
User avatar #4 - paigeyy (12/20/2012) [-]
Hi Bradys
User avatar #5 to #4 - Sexysammich (12/20/2012) [-]
Paigeyy!
User avatar #1 - Pika (09/13/2011) [-]
SO I ****** YOU
User avatar #3 to #2 - Pika (09/13/2011) [-]
Sorry.
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