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OldSnake

Last status update:
-
Gender: male
Date Signed Up:1/29/2010
Location:Shadow Moses Island
FunnyJunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#692
Highest Content Rank:#2085
Highest Comment Rank:#379
Content Thumbs: 6967 total,  7923 ,  956
Comment Thumbs: 35094 total,  38736 ,  3642
Content Level Progress: 37% (37/100)
Level 169 Content: Soldier Of Funnyjunk → Level 170 Content: Soldier Of Funnyjunk
Comment Level Progress: 58.5% (585/1000)
Level 330 Comments: Practically Famous → Level 331 Comments: Practically Famous
Subscribers:14
Content Views:259200
Times Content Favorited:316 times
Total Comments Made:6259
FJ Points:27566
Favorite Tags: the (8) | a (6) | and (5) | i (5) | lol (5) | no (4) | are (3) | blob (3) | die (3) | in (3) | is (3) | more (3) | of (3) | Rape (3) | Snake (3) | tears (3) | tentacle (3) | with (3) | acid (2) | all (2)
OTACON! What should I type for my profile?

latest user's comments

#12 - Nooooooo. Who'da thunk it? 03/04/2016 on Dice Report: Gender Plays... +2
#7 - DUN DUN! Dammit, the mower caught some rocks again. 03/04/2016 on Donk Donk +12
#11 - >"Michael Bay Highway" >LiveLeak 03/04/2016 on MICHAEL BAY HIGHWAY +1
#9 - "6YES665" Now, I know which license plate n…  [+] (129 new replies) 03/04/2016 on Failed Brake Check +66
User avatar
#15 - policexplain (03/04/2016) [-]
Comes back to some d-bag out of So Cal. =)
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#39 - ryanunlockedsjw (03/04/2016) [-]
You ever gonna do more Police story comps?
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#89 - policexplain (03/05/2016) [-]
I hope to. I've just been really busy.
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#86 - policexplain (03/05/2016) [-]
I hope so. I've been very busy. =(
#18 - OldSnake (03/04/2016) [-]
Somehow, the architecture and trees shown in the gif tipped me off that it was someone in California.

In any case, I'm relieved to live on the complete opposite side of the country. Means I won't have to deal with this guy anytime soon.
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#14 - Silver Quantum (03/04/2016) [-]
yes i'm sure you're gonna remember it by tomorrow
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#32 - AcidFlux (03/04/2016) [-]
There are these things called pencils that you can write stuff down with.

Also, it's a fairly easy plate to commit to memory.
6. YES. 665.
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#33 - Silver Quantum (03/04/2016) [-]
yeah and how long do you think he's gonna keep that plate number in mind? i'm sure he already forgot about it
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#34 - AcidFlux (03/04/2016) [-]
Do you come on the internet specifically to be a Debbie Downer, or is it a side effect of not getting laid recently?
#71 - anon (03/05/2016) [-]
LOL yes, the immediate consequences of debbieing ones downer is the absence of coital arrangements in the sleeping quarters! Classic prank my good sir!
#81 - AcidFlux (03/05/2016) [-]
Agreed, learned friend! T'was a good jest, and now it is the hour for repose. Until the morn!
#37 - Silver Quantum (03/04/2016) [-]
you're one of those retards that calls the other guy a virgin or some other shit like that just because you got no valid counter argument. nice one bruh
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#40 - AcidFlux (03/04/2016) [-]
I had a valid counter argument, you dense fucktard. It's an easy to remember sequence of characters.
6, as in the length of your dick in centimeters.
Followed by the word YES, which is what your mother say every time someone asks if she wants to fuck.
Followed by the number 665, which is the Neighbor of the Beast. Which is also your mother's address, because that makes it easier to get assfucked by Almighty Lucifer himself every afternoon, right before you get home from school

See? Easy to remember. What, do you not have the ability to remember shit? Do you have a phone? Do you remember the phone number? Or do you have to stop and think it out, and take off your shoes to count on your toes, you mouth-breathing redneck?

Normal humans can remember things, if they so choose. And this started out as a simple commentary to point out to you that:

1) PEOPLE CAN WRITE SHIT DOWN! If they need help remembering something, they can write it down. IN fact, the fucking picture you replied to has an animated image of someone using a fucking pencil. You should be familiar with pencils. Your dick is about the same size around.

2) PEOPLE CAN COMMIT THINGS TO MEMORY! The fact that you can't with your 7 chromosomes and malformed frontal lobes doesn't mean a normal person can't.

You say I had no valid counterargument? Learn to fucking read & comprehend, you shit-eating fucktard. The best part of you was swallowed by your mother then vomited up in the back of a rusted out '63 El Camino. She should have finished the job and douched your pathetic excuse of a blastula into a Port-A-John where it belonged.

You add nothing of value. You are a leech. Fuck off and die in a fire.


Is that better? I mean, I just started out with being light and humorous... but some shitfucks need to get curb stomped.

Next time, before you claim there's no 'valid counter argument', read it and fucking comprehend it, you fuckin' pooftah.
User avatar
#42 - Silver Quantum (03/04/2016) [-]
i didn't say it's difficult to remember you fucking inbred shitstick. i said he's not gonna remember it soon after watching this content. no one makes an effort to commit to memory the license plate of some random dude he saw on the internet. we remember phone numbers because we use them often you retarded nignog. it certainly was a sad day for humanity the day you slithered out of the abortion bucket you fucking dickcheese
#45 - AcidFlux (03/04/2016) [-]
Oh, look, nothing original in that at all, just copypasta.
Joke about being inbred. Did that. Redneck, basically same thing.
OOh, abortion bucket! Kinda the same thing as the Port-a-John, I guess.
Oooh, nignog! Good one! I didn't think to go racist in my last comment. Good catch, sandnigger.

Do you not get that OldSnake was making a joke?

I mean, holy shit, a joke on a website called FunnyJunk.

Then you try to be all, "Well, herp, ackshually".
Captain Buzzkill. Good job, shitbreath.

Now... was that just a bad attempt at a joke, or were you really being a nitpicking fucktard buzzkill?

Please, keep digging, you pathetic piece of dogshit.

What's it going to be next? You failed like a parapalegic lobotomy patient trying to learn how to wipe themselves properly (how is your dad, by the way?), in your attempt to claim I had no counter argument.

You based it on an assumption that he won't make an effort? Well, gee, maybe either it was a joke, or if he was serious, it's not that hard to commit to memory.

Your logic is flawed and your execution was repulsive, much like everything else about you. Your point has been destroyed and your comments are shit-filled, much like your mother's cunt.

Now... feel free to take some time to compose a reply. I hope you do. Because watching you flail and fail is so very amusing, my little turd sucker. I'll be gone for a while, so you've got plenty of time to work all four of those neurons in that misshapen lump on top of your neck to try to create a retort worth reading.

I'm looking forward to another chuckle, you irrelevant fuckstain.
#46 - Silver Quantum (03/04/2016) [-]
you write entire novels as autistic replies throwing every insult you can find on google at me and you're telling me to take time to compose a reply.
User avatar
#47 - AcidFlux (03/04/2016) [-]
Shhh... It's okay. Try again.

You're the autistic fuck that couldn't understand the joke. I weep for you, child.

And none of that was Googled, you beautiful bastard. All created just for you.

That's the power of more than a handful of brain cells... creativity & intelligence.

Now, run along and try again...
#48 - Silver Quantum (03/04/2016) [-]
try harder fuckface. your frustration isn't showing enough. try down voting this comment as well. maybe that will make you feel better rofl
#82 - AcidFlux (03/05/2016) [-]
You misunderstand your position here. You are the pathetic court jackanape, the target of derision and scorn.

In other words, you're being laughed AT, not laughed WITH.

You are either too obtuse to realize this, which is greatly amusing in itself, or you are desperately trying to deflect and hope others believe your lies.

But you don't believe your own lies, do you? You know the dark truth. In the quiet of the night, you realize you have no value to this world. You bring no joy to anyone. And the word would be better off had you never existed. Your very presence is an affront to humanity.

Sleep well, little jester.
#83 - Silver Quantum (03/05/2016) [-]
jesus christ are you desperate. you are trying this hard because you failed in life and the only thing stopping you from committing suicide is trying to make random people on the internet feel as miserable as you? it's ok little man. things will eventually get better... maybe. just promise me you are gonna try not to cry yourself to sleep again tonight. go ahead and reply another ridiculously long comment. it will give you something to do to prevent you from killing yourself for one more day.
#84 - AcidFlux (03/05/2016) [-]
Oooh, struck a chord did I?

It's okay, let it all out. Uncle Flux is here. Tell me all about how life is unfair, and you have to piss on other people's fun just to feel better about yourself. Think back; how did this begin? Ah, yes, you having a stick up your ass about OldSnake's funny comment.

Now, who shoved that stick up there? Was it Daddy, by not loving you enough? Maybe he never paid attention to you? Or did Mommy wean you off the teat a little too late, and now you have abandonment issues.

Free therapy here. Go ahead and let it all out, you whiny, humorless, worthless little shit.
#85 - Silver Quantum (03/05/2016) [-]
that's it, thaat's it. but try a little more this time. i'm still not feeling the passion in your rage enough
#88 - AcidFlux (03/05/2016) [-]
Rage? Again, you're misunderstanding.

I'm not angry at you, sweetie. I'm just very disappointed.
#90 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
you're disappointed. sure buddy. let's go with that lol
#91 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
You've been amusing. Thanks! We'll have to do this again sometime.

There's someone having a good time next door. You want to go shit on their birthday cake? I'll meet you there in a bit.

Adieu, merde manger garçon baiseur.
#192 - Silver Quantum (03/25/2016) [-]
but of course! ok you won the last round of hide and seek. I hide this time and you seek
#193 - AcidFlux (03/25/2016) [-]
Okay, go hide, and I'll see if I can find where you posted.
#190 - Silver Quantum (03/25/2016) [-]
you sure did champ, you sure did
#191 - AcidFlux (03/25/2016) [-]
Gotcha.

Knew you couldn't resist. You're so easy to reel back in.
#177 - Silver Quantum (03/15/2016) [-]
gonna do an experiment. i won't tell you what it is but let's see how you do
#189 - AcidFlux (03/25/2016) [-]
And that, boys and girls, is how you win an Internet Argument.


Toodles, bitches!
#187 - AcidFlux (03/23/2016) [-]
Hee hee! Your turn to hide, and my turn to seek!
#180 - AcidFlux (03/16/2016) [-]
#176 - Silver Quantum (03/15/2016) [-]
oh thank god you're still here! thought i had lost my favorite squirmy entertainer
#181 - AcidFlux (03/16/2016) [-]
#174 - Silver Quantum (03/14/2016) [-]
there you are
#175 - AcidFlux (03/14/2016) [-]
Don't worry, little one. Mama's got your binky.
#172 - Silver Quantum (03/13/2016) [-]
come on cheese boy where you at?
#173 - AcidFlux (03/14/2016) [-]
Oooh, look who can't resist. How's that anticipation feel?

Careful, sweetie. You're starting to sound desperate.
#171 - Silver Quantum (03/13/2016) [-]
exactly. you don't always find entertainment like this around here
#169 - Silver Quantum (03/13/2016) [-]
too bad because you're still as entertaining as ever
#170 - AcidFlux (03/13/2016) [-]
Which is why you keep coming back. You can't resist the temptation.
#167 - Silver Quantum (03/12/2016) [-]
#168 - AcidFlux (03/13/2016) [-]
Damn son. Getting disappointed again.
#165 - Silver Quantum (03/12/2016) [-]
#166 - AcidFlux (03/12/2016) [-]
#163 - Silver Quantum (03/12/2016) [-]
#164 - AcidFlux (03/12/2016) [-]
#161 - Silver Quantum (03/12/2016) [-]
#162 - AcidFlux (03/12/2016) [-]
#159 - Silver Quantum (03/12/2016) [-]
#160 - AcidFlux (03/12/2016) [-]
#157 - Silver Quantum (03/11/2016) [-]
#158 - AcidFlux (03/11/2016) [-]
#153 - Silver Quantum (03/10/2016) [-]
#156 - AcidFlux (03/11/2016) [-]
#155 - Silver Quantum (03/10/2016) [-]
#154 - AcidFlux (03/10/2016) [-]
#151 - Silver Quantum (03/10/2016) [-]
#152 - AcidFlux (03/10/2016) [-]
#149 - Silver Quantum (03/10/2016) [-]
#150 - AcidFlux (03/10/2016) [-]
6YES665
#147 - Silver Quantum (03/10/2016) [-]
#148 - AcidFlux (03/10/2016) [-]
That's my boy!

Shall we get jiggy with it?
#145 - Silver Quantum (03/10/2016) [-]
didn't wanna lose one of my main sources of entertainment
User avatar
#146 - AcidFlux (03/10/2016) [-]
#143 - Silver Quantum (03/10/2016) [-]
why are you so obsessed with having things up your ass?
#144 - AcidFlux (03/10/2016) [-]
Whew! You're talking again, I thought I lost you!!
#141 - Silver Quantum (03/10/2016) [-]
#139 - Silver Quantum (03/09/2016) [-]
#140 - AcidFlux (03/10/2016) [-]
Look, sweetie, I know you're embarrassed about your... performance. But that's okay! I've got a doctor's appointment for you for tomorrow, and he'll help you work something out.
#137 - Silver Quantum (03/09/2016) [-]
#138 - AcidFlux (03/09/2016) [-]
There's someone else, isn't there, you bastard!
#135 - Silver Quantum (03/09/2016) [-]
#136 - AcidFlux (03/09/2016) [-]
So, you won't even talk to me anymore! I think we need to consider couples therapy.
#133 - Silver Quantum (03/08/2016) [-]
bazuka!
#134 - AcidFlux (03/09/2016) [-]
What happened to us? We used to be so good together. *sob*

Now it's like you don't even care anymore...

#131 - Silver Quantum (03/08/2016) [-]
bozungo!
#132 - AcidFlux (03/08/2016) [-]
Now you're not even trying anymore. Has the relationship gotten stale?

Do... do you want to see other people?

I mean, I just want you to be happy, so it's okay if you do.
#128 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
come on cheese boy, entertain me some more!
#129 - AcidFlux (03/08/2016) [-]
Oh, no, no, no! That's not how this works! You bit the hook, so you're entertaining me!
#127 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
dude you forgot to say bazonga
#130 - AcidFlux (03/08/2016) [-]
Bojangles
#125 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
>vajayjay
>bazonga

holy fuck my sides
#126 - AcidFlux (03/07/2016) [-]
Same here! It's refreshing to find someone so willing to play along.

Assuming it's been intentional on your part... oh, God, I really hope it's been intentional on your part.

It would be... kind of sad otherwise. You don't want me to be sad, do you?
User avatar
#122 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
and yes i'm addicted to this level of entertainment that you're so good at providing so sure, come back after you're done taking your dad's daily intake of dick cheese. i'll be waiting
#123 - AcidFlux (03/07/2016) [-]
You misunderstand. That cheese was cultivated from your dear, departed mother's vajayjay.

Bazonga!
#121 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
"Because I know you can't possibly resist"
seems like your dad couldn't resist abusing you either. i even found a picture of you
#124 - AcidFlux (03/07/2016) [-]
That's ironic! Because I found your eHarmony profile, and this is your match!

Between the two of you, there might be a three-toed sloth in the making!

Woot!


More cheese, my friend? Please, oh please don't tell me you're full already!

Come on, Algernon, you know you want more!!!
#119 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
at least i'm distracting you from all the pain
#120 - AcidFlux (03/07/2016) [-]
Funny. Here I thought you were the one that needed the distraction.

It's like you're addicted to it. Like you can't help yourself.

Keep on going, Charlie.

See ya in a bit. Because I know you can't possibly resist.
User avatar
#117 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
i don't know why you keep telling me what your dad tells you every night. i get it, he rapes you a lot. go seek therapy
#118 - AcidFlux (03/07/2016) [-]
My sides... seriously.

Damn, son, you're killin' me here! Such witty repartee!

Please, continue. It's free entertainment, and I love how twitchy you get.

It gives me shivers!!!
User avatar
#115 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
because you already swallowed it. your dad must be proud
#116 - AcidFlux (03/07/2016) [-]
Hey, man, I still got plenty of cheese for you! As much as you want. Since you can't resist.

Eat up, buddy!
User avatar
#113 - Silver Quantum (03/07/2016) [-]
"Have a little more cheese. It's good for you!"

you would know
#114 - AcidFlux (03/07/2016) [-]
Nah, cheese is for pooftahs. But you seem to like it, so why not keep giving it to you?
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#111 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
that looks like a repressed memory you have of your dad
#112 - AcidFlux (03/07/2016) [-]
Shit, man, you think if my dad was Sir Patrick Stewart, I'd be wasting time on this site?

lol

Have a little more cheese. It's good for you!
#109 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
it seems like i kept you awake for a couple of days waiting for me to reply. that's good news. that means i've distracted you enough that you haven't killed yourself yet. but sadly i cannot compete against supernatural stamina powered by rage induced autism. but fear not. there is still hope for you. pic related
#110 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
There he is! That's my good little guy!

Is the cheese tasty?
User avatar
#106 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
breadcrumbs to what? the closet you just walked out of? i don't deal with faggy shit. i think your dad has you covered in that area
#108 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
Yoo hoo! Are we done already? I thought you had more stamina...
#107 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
User avatar
#102 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
"press your cheek firmly against mine."

i see you're a flaming faggot
#105 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
Good night, loverboy.
#104 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
That's it.... just a bit further... keep following the breadcrumbs...
#100 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
my sides indeed lol
#103 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
Follow the yellow brick road... not much further now, my pretty.
#98 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
#101 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
Even better! Yes, press your cheek firmly against mine.

#96 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
#99 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
Yes... delicious. Continue. My sides.
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#94 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
holy shit you're the most desperately enraged dude i've ever seen on this site. like what the fuck did you even think you'd achieve commenting in arabic?
#97 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
What did I hope to achieve?


/Failed+brake+check/hdgifs/5847749/94#94
#92 - Silver Quantum (03/06/2016) [-]
sure thing bro. you should write a book about your life. you seem to have a thing for writing rage filled page-long comments. i'm sure it'll be a best seller in the autism section of your local book store.
#95 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
Shit I forgot the funny picture.

That's our thing now, sweetheart. I haven't forgotten.

User avatar
#93 - AcidFlux (03/06/2016) [-]
هل سيكون الأول من نوعه في خط لشراء نسخ لجميع أصدقائك وعائلتك . بحيث يكون مثل نسختين في المجموع. ما لا يقل عن أمك صديقك . هذا مثير للشفقة القرف القليل من الدهون . يموت في حريق . ولها حياة عظيمة .

غير أن لديك أفضل إهانة قائلا الناس الذين يعانون من التوحد الذي يبدو التوحد جدا بالنسبة لي
User avatar
#41 - AcidFlux (03/04/2016) [-]
I'm sorry, man. My bad. I should not have typed all of that without a better explanation.

6 centimeters is 2.36 inches.

Whew, much better! I was worried that went over your head.

User avatar
#178 - AcidFlux (03/15/2016) [-]
Shhh... he'll never find me down here. He's so obsessive...
#179 - AcidFlux (03/15/2016) [-]
Heh heh heh... he still hasn't found me!!! I wonder, how long should I let him wait?

Any ideas?
#182 - AcidFlux (03/16/2016) [-]
I like experiments!!!
#183 - AcidFlux (03/17/2016) [-]
I wonder how long I can keep this up.
#184 - AcidFlux (03/21/2016) [-]
FIVE DAYS!!! And he still hasn't found me!!!
#185 - AcidFlux (03/23/2016) [-]
O. M. G.


Do you think we can make it a full week before he finds me?
#186 - AcidFlux (03/23/2016) [-]
YAY! A full week!
I'm really good at hide & seek!
Silver Quantum thought I was gone.
But it was me, Dio, all along!!
User avatar
#194 - AcidFlux (04/05/2016) [-]
Nope, you're not here... hmmm...
#15 - "Garry's Mod" 03/04/2016 on Safe search +8
#21 - Picture  [+] (1 new reply) 03/04/2016 on turnin dreams to comics +4
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#22 - valigar (03/04/2016) [-]
I lost it at the lip sink XD
#7 - Picture 03/04/2016 on Puns +18
#26 - Oh, my car! 03/04/2016 on Your mom humping a car 0
#15 - You guess right.  [+] (1 new reply) 03/04/2016 on Sorry Not Sorry +5
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#85 - alekksandar (03/04/2016) [-]
why do I get the feeling furries jack it off to that
#9 - Hah, Reggie's missing out on a pretty good part of the pizza. … 03/04/2016 on Amugl Foneryid Uglurlu +20