Last status update:
Personal Info
Gender: male
Age: 23
Date Signed Up:9/30/2010
Last Login:11/15/2014
FunnyJunk Career Stats
Content Thumbs: 19038 total,  21939 ,  2901
Comment Thumbs: 7423 total,  8463 ,  1040
Content Level Progress: 3.1% (31/1000)
Level 219 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 220 Content: Mind Blower
Comment Level Progress: 17% (17/100)
Level 274 Comments: Ninja Pirate → Level 275 Comments: Ninja Pirate
Content Views:563218
Times Content Favorited:1221 times
Total Comments Made:4684
FJ Points:28419



  • Views: 532
    Thumbs Up 2 Thumbs Down 2 Total: 0
    Comments: 2
    Favorites: 0
    Uploaded: 11/29/10
    I Am The Batman! I Am The Batman!
  • Views: 291
    Thumbs Up 1 Thumbs Down 1 Total: 0
    Comments: 0
    Favorites: 0
    Uploaded: 11/18/10
    Up Up
  • Views: 589
    Thumbs Up 1 Thumbs Down 2 Total: -1
    Comments: 0
    Favorites: 0
    Uploaded: 10/04/10
    Who Is? Who Is?
  • Views: 977
    Thumbs Up 9 Thumbs Down 11 Total: -2
    Comments: 1
    Favorites: 2
    Uploaded: 11/11/10
    Dick breaker Dick breaker
  • Views: 647
    Thumbs Up 3 Thumbs Down 5 Total: -2
    Comments: 2
    Favorites: 0
    Uploaded: 11/03/10
  • Views: 687
    Thumbs Up 5 Thumbs Down 8 Total: -3
    Comments: 10
    Favorites: 0
    Uploaded: 06/20/11
    If you get the reference, you are awesom If you get the reference, you...
< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 > [ 89 ]


Total unique items point value: 2050 / Total items point value: 2350


Refresh Comments
Anonymous comments allowed.
#363 - ancientchaos (09/23/2014) [-]
stop memein me bro im going to dick you right in the mouth
stop memein me bro im going to dick you right in the mouth
#361 - ancientchaos has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #360 - bigfatniggerdickz (09/02/2013) [-]
User avatar #356 - jontron (08/03/2013) [-]
User avatar #357 to #356 - Goatmanlll (08/03/2013) [-]
wad u want
User avatar #358 to #357 - jontron (08/03/2013) [-]
u feg
User avatar #359 to #358 - ancientchaos (08/13/2013) [-]
whaddaya doing on his profile, get outta here


#355 - alexclement (07/31/2013) [-]
Do you want your FJ points since you dont play items game?
#350 - genericho **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#348 - Goatmanlll (12/13/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #349 to #348 - mangioluingi ONLINE (01/05/2013) [-]
#347 - Goatmanlll (12/11/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #311 - jklbnm (11/30/2012) [-]
User avatar #310 - jklbnm (11/30/2012) [-]
User avatar #312 to #310 - Goatmanlll (11/30/2012) [-]
Hwat about em?
User avatar #313 to #312 - jklbnm (11/30/2012) [-]
They're grump
User avatar #314 to #313 - Goatmanlll (11/30/2012) [-]
And not so grump.
User avatar #315 to #314 - jklbnm (11/30/2012) [-]
Together they are both Game Grumps
User avatar #316 to #315 - Goatmanlll (11/30/2012) [-]
Sometimes they are in their own corners.
User avatar #317 to #316 - jklbnm (11/30/2012) [-]
Then both fight in a tournament only using their wits
User avatar #318 to #317 - Goatmanlll (11/30/2012) [-]
>Gum gamps
#309 - Goatmanlll (11/08/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #308 - Goatmanlll (11/06/2012) [-]

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)

Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except North Dakota, which she does not fancy).

Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections.

Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:


1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').


2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'


3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.


4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.


5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.


6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.


7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.


8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.


9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.


10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.


11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).


12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.


13.. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.


14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).


15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

God Save the Queen!

PS: Only share this with friends who have a good sense of humour (NOT humor)!
#307 - felinescrotum **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #288 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
y u so ghey ?
#289 to #288 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
y u so pretty?

Also, don't tell me you wouldn't do this guy.
User avatar #290 to #289 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
:3 aaww shucks
6/10 would bang
how are you ?
User avatar #291 to #290 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
Pretty good. Hanging out with a friend today. Haven't seen her in a while.
User avatar #292 to #291 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
ahh had fun ?
User avatar #293 to #292 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
She is coming over in 3 hours. So I have plenty of time.
User avatar #294 to #293 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
so tell me more about yourself ...
User avatar #295 to #294 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
Oh, um, well, I'm a gamer from birth. And not just video games, I've played every nerdy thing possible. Uuuh, I used to do game revues for a newsletter till it went under. I enjoy reading, movies, animation, and science fiction stuff.
User avatar #296 to #295 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
i play ALOT of games but not enough to be called a gamer , i really enjoy reading aswell what kind do you like ?,and what kind of movies do you prefer ?
User avatar #297 to #296 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
Fantasy and Science-Fiction, mostly. I enjoy Ray Bradbury's work, and I've read everything by J.R.R. Tolkien.
User avatar #298 to #297 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
ahhh im not into that kind of stuff , mostly murder mysteries , asl ?
User avatar #299 to #298 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
What is this, omegle? 20, male, Virginia
User avatar #300 to #299 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
no i just like asking , it gets weird when you talk to someone and you find out in the end there completely the opposite of what you though they would be :)
User avatar #302 to #300 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
What is YOUR asl?
User avatar #303 to #302 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
i never said cuz you never asked :)
15/f/pakistan (thats where im from not where i live )
User avatar #304 to #303 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
Parents in Foreign Service?
User avatar #305 to #304 - dingdongsingsong (10/15/2012) [-]
lol wut ? :D
User avatar #306 to #305 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
I unno!
User avatar #301 to #300 - Goatmanlll (10/15/2012) [-]
Its fine, I get it.
Leave a comment
 Friends (0)