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What I learned in the Military.

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Submitted: 07/02/2013
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#13 - Muppetz (07/02/2013) [-]
11> You can get a boot to do just about ******* anything if you can make it sound legit.
12> Take this hammer and look for weak spots on the tanks armor. (You'll hear the difference)
13> A Marine on duty has no friends
14> 1stSgt's open door policy is a trap. No matter how many times he says it, you better not take you stupid ******* problems to a 1stSgt
15> Bring Baby wipes.
16> **** your sleep.
17> Stop smoking in the turret
18> Get'cher hands out yer Daggum Pockets!!!
19> If someone knocks on your barracks door early Saturday morning. DO NOT answer it! It means some dick didnt show up for duty, and they are looking for someone to cover him
20> They'll never understand the mentality. Don't bother trying to justify yourselves to civilians. It's just something you have to live through to really get.
User avatar #15 to #13 - tikledpikle (07/02/2013) [-]
i gave a money management lesson to a boot by making him smoke a cig through his nose. he never asked for a smoke ever again.
User avatar #35 to #15 - nalapsi (07/02/2013) [-]
A proper boot would have asked for another for the other nostril....
User avatar #36 to #35 - tikledpikle (07/02/2013) [-]
they just don't have proper discipline these days man.
User avatar #38 to #36 - nalapsi (07/02/2013) [-]
I know man if your gonna have a dragon breath you gotta do it properly
User avatar #28 to #13 - imakejewburgers (07/02/2013) [-]
What is a boot?
User avatar #37 to #28 - nalapsi (07/02/2013) [-]
A marine, comes from the nickname bootneck.
User avatar #66 to #37 - Muppetz (07/03/2013) [-]
It means a Marine fresh out of bootcamp.
One who is brand new to the fleet.

American Marines are Leathernecks.
Bootneck is the English Royal Marines.
User avatar #69 to #66 - nalapsi (07/03/2013) [-]
I work alongside the Royal Marines so you can understand my confusion
User avatar #33 to #13 - hellomynameisgodsy (07/02/2013) [-]
Please tell me the hammer one is about pisssing off the people inside?
#41 to #13 - Rascal (07/02/2013) [-]
Add to 12.

Go unscrew the gunner turret, Exhaust sample, Go get me the DZ keys(For airborne) , Max effective range of an M9.
User avatar #17 - angelious (07/02/2013) [-]
im actually leaving for military in 6 days.

wish me luck
User avatar #43 to #17 - ohsnapitzari (07/02/2013) [-]
I leave august 6th!
What branch?
User avatar #67 to #43 - angelious (07/03/2013) [-]
for now all i know is infantry ^^

my country only has three branches that then divide on more specific specialization afterwards
#47 to #17 - Rascal (07/03/2013) [-]
Good Luck mate.
#48 to #17 - fourkids **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #68 to #48 - angelious (07/03/2013) [-]
hmm well i dont think dying will be much of a trouble in my country(atleast for now...never know what those russians and swedish peopel are up to ;P )

but yeah ill take your hint for it train industry does seem to be a well paying job wich involves alot of travelling
User avatar #52 to #17 - crazycommando (07/03/2013) [-]
good luck buddy, I just got out, spending some chill time and getting back into it in Septembre
#20 to #17 - Rascal (07/02/2013) [-]
i hope u die faget
#25 to #20 - Rascal (07/02/2013) [-]
I know you're just a troll, but either way.

How does it feel to be a little bitch? Bet you, you wont go out there, nah, you'd rather sit at home on your fat ass, doing nothing with your life.

Posting as anon, because I dont give a **** about rep on a ****** website, filled with the likes of u.
#39 to #25 - watanigga **User deleted account** (07/02/2013) [-]
I'd rather sit on my fat ass and do nothing too... but I've got 2 years left.
User avatar #32 to #25 - hellomynameisgodsy (07/02/2013) [-]
Here here!
User avatar #23 to #17 - davisdamen (07/02/2013) [-]
deployment or basic?
i ask because i'm heading out to navy basic in 6 days
#19 to #17 - Rascal (07/02/2013) [-]
Good luck
#24 to #17 - dagold (07/02/2013) [-]
from somebody 3 weeks from graduation AIT
User avatar #18 - mrwalkerfour (07/02/2013) [-]
what I learned in training

- if on excercise it WILL rain. no exceptions

- a platoon commander is basically a sergeants bitch

-all PT instructors are self loving pricks

-the "rules" are optional when dealing with recruits

we can carry a weapon around but god help you if the CQMS sees you running without a high vis vest

WHAT I learned at regiment

-90 percent of what I learned is retarded and overly complicated
#40 - athievinghobo (07/02/2013) [-]
MFW Title:
What I learned in boating school is!
User avatar #31 - sepheroth (07/02/2013) [-]
I bartended at an event for the first time last night, I can vouch for number 7.
User avatar #60 - warlockrichard (07/03/2013) [-]
to all of the other military commenting who else is familiar with the term "half right face! front leaning rest position move"?
User avatar #62 to #60 - fyourahole (07/03/2013) [-]
The very reason for my upper-body strength.
#29 - Rascal (07/02/2013) [-]
Thinking about joining the Army. I think this post may be a sign lol.
User avatar #27 - fyourahole (07/02/2013) [-]
Hey! I really appreciate you all taking the time to comment on this: I've never posted a plain text content before, and I'm glad it piqued some interest!
User avatar #8 - pompladouche (07/02/2013) [-]
#5 is the ******* truth lol
#6 - orosenkai (07/02/2013) [-]
Just to ask does anyone not raised in a military faimly know what #9 is. :/
User avatar #7 to #6 - pompladouche (07/02/2013) [-]
a girl. At 10pm she is a 2...at 2 am, she is a 10
#46 to #7 - Rascal (07/03/2013) [-]
Wouldn't that be 10 AM since military time for 10 PM is 2200?
#5 - Rascal (07/02/2013) [-]
I learned that grid-squares don't exist and exhaust samples are just there to piss off the NCO's.
Oh, and don't **** with the supply sergeant.
#9 to #5 - kaslin (07/02/2013) [-]
Man, get in good with your Supply Sergeant. Items that took months for other guys to get from requisition I got in a couple of weeks because I volunteered to help out around the supply room a few times.
If you **** with them...yea, you're pretty much screwed on new gear.
User avatar #30 to #9 - fyourahole (07/02/2013) [-]
Wonder if anyone else noticed "Captain Obvious." Haha
User avatar #21 to #9 - mondominiman (07/02/2013) [-]
I got a buddy who's in the army and he's the guy who deals with all the supplies and stuff. He says since he's been in there so long he gets a few free things or something and he ended up giving me a spare Gerber military issue multi-tool for free.
User avatar #42 to #21 - exceptional (07/02/2013) [-]
i also have a buddy in the army who is also a supply specialist and he has given me a container that they use to hold grenades
#64 - zagorskeet (07/03/2013) [-]
As a combat vet, I can confirm the above is true. Believe it or not I got a friend on FJ that was in my brigade.
User avatar #56 - Ragumshnagum (07/03/2013) [-]
I haven't the slightest idea what #9 is supposed to mean.
User avatar #59 to #56 - fyourahole (07/03/2013) [-]
Girls. A 2 at 10pm is a 10 at 2pm.
User avatar #54 - charpentier (07/03/2013) [-]
-You are allowed to do anything, except get caught,
#51 - Rascal (07/03/2013) [-]
Sailor here. Don't go into Navy fleet. PLEASE. I've never been more unhappy, and yeah, you have to live through it to understand.
#49 - crazycommando (07/03/2013) [-]
i concur with this post

what the Navy has taught me :

- no matter how hard you try to suppress the gay / shower they always find a way to crack one.

-We get way to much tech and intense training for a **** job ( my career field was somewhat between a Marines a Commando and an MP's )

-somewhere/somehow/ someone is just waiting to chew you out.

and that's all folks... although i have many more ****** up/ funny souvenir

By the way OP where did you serve if you don't mind me asking ?
User avatar #50 to #49 - crazycommando (07/03/2013) [-]
gay shower JOKES* ******* keyboard...
User avatar #53 to #49 - fyourahole (07/03/2013) [-]
I'm still in, US Army Airborne Infantry, 82nd Airborne on my way over to SOF. I'm an E-6 now, so this is all kind of old lessons haha.
User avatar #55 to #53 - crazycommando (07/03/2013) [-]
SOF eh, good job bud, wishing you all the best

I was in the French Navy, as Naval Infantry, got out for a while, and now i'm heading into the French Naval SOF.

From a fellow SOF candidate, good luck dude
User avatar #57 to #55 - fyourahole (07/03/2013) [-]
You too brother, Sua Sponte!
User avatar #58 to #57 - crazycommando (07/03/2013) [-]
Haha nice man ;) RLTW to you my friend !
User avatar #61 to #49 - toncheky (07/03/2013) [-]
What do you mean (OP too) by "chewing out"?
User avatar #63 to #61 - crazycommando (07/03/2013) [-]
chewing someone out is telling them off...yeah pretty much
User avatar #22 - mondominiman (07/02/2013) [-]
I want to join the military, not to be a soldier but as one of the telecomm techs out their.
User avatar #26 to #22 - cousin ONLINE (07/02/2013) [-]
My mate just finished his training for that, in the RAF. He's never been so damn busy!
User avatar #16 - OperationValkyrie (07/02/2013) [-]
It took the military to teach you that videogames are ******** ?
User avatar #14 - trollins (07/02/2013) [-]
How do I pee without making noise in the forest?
User avatar #11 - segbloodhound ONLINE (07/02/2013) [-]
10 is the absolute truth out of country
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