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post your most brutal joke

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Views: 73831
Favorited: 507
Submitted: 06/27/2013
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#1 - xxenriquejuansonxx ONLINE (06/27/2013) [+] (14 replies)
How do you know if a girl is too young for you?

You have to make airplane noises to stick your cock in her mouth
#22 - puppetstigma **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (10 replies)
#25 - arthuun (06/27/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Jokes don't kill people.
Muslims who are offended by jokes kill people.
#92 - crosskill (06/27/2013) [+] (5 replies)
A woman is giving birth at the hospital and the baby is finally crowning.

"Push! Push!", said the doctor.

After much pushing the baby finally comes out.

The doctor looks at the baby.

Then he starts beating it in the face.

Then he passes the baby to the nurse. The nurse starts kicking the baby like a ball.

During this the mother is freaking out.

"What the hell is going on!?", she screams.

After slam dunking the baby into the floor the doctor looks up at the woman and says, "April Fools it was already dead!"
User avatar #23 - whycanticaps (06/27/2013) [+] (4 replies)
Did you guys know Princess Diana had dandruff?

They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment
User avatar #6 - blackscales (06/27/2013) [+] (3 replies)
Statistically speaking, 4 out of 5 people enjoy gang rape.
User avatar #9 - damphyr (06/27/2013) [+] (3 replies)
How do you kill a retard?
Give him a knife and ask him "Who is a special guy?"
User avatar #26 - cluttershy (06/27/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Have you ever had Ethiopian food?

Neither have they.
User avatar #99 - barbwirepain (06/27/2013) [+] (2 replies)
A little girl is in the shower with her mom, she looks up and sees her moms breasts. Mommy mommy, what are those? she asks. The mother says those are my breasts. The little girl asks, when will i get them? The mother responds, when you're older.

A few days later the little girl is in the shower with her father. She looks and sees his penis and asks. Daddy daddy, what's that? The father responds, that's my penis dear. The little girl asks, when will I get one? The father replies, oh when your mom leaves for work.
User avatar #39 - BerryLicious (06/27/2013) [+] (4 replies)
Women's rights.
User avatar #41 - martycamp (06/27/2013) [-]
I was raping a woman the other night and she cried, "Please, think of my children!"

Kinky bitch.
#43 - prontoon ONLINE (06/27/2013) [+] (5 replies)
what do you get when you put a baby in the microwave?   
an erection
what do you get when you put a baby in the microwave?

an erection
#35 - ljetibo (06/27/2013) [-]
how do you know your sister is on her period? Your fathers dick tastes like blood.
User avatar #136 - princesssakura (06/27/2013) [-]
Hitler walks into the meeting room and turns to his trusted staff, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and 1 kitten."
Everyone looks around the table and after a long silence, Goering pipes up, “Mein Führer, why do you want to kill a kitten?"
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table, “You see, no one cares about the Jews."
User avatar #11 - phantomi (06/27/2013) [+] (1 reply)
What did the Jewish pedophile say?
"Would you like to buy some candy?"
User avatar #18 - darrenlammoman (06/27/2013) [+] (4 replies)
whats the difference between a watermelon and a baby?
ones fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and the other ones a watermelon
#19 - happybutler (06/27/2013) [-]
How easy is it to copy an entire thread off reddit and repost it?

This easy
#13 - zekaizer (06/27/2013) [+] (4 replies)
Already saw some dead baby jokes below, but here goes.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? Ten dead babies in a trash can.
What's worse than that? One live baby at the bottom, eating its way to the top.

How do you get a dead baby into a cup? With a blender.
How do you get it out? With a straw.

What did the leper say to the prostitute?
"Keep the tip."
User avatar #53 - kenman (06/27/2013) [+] (2 replies)
So I was eating this chick out yesterday and I tasted horse semen.

"Huh, so that's how you died, Grandma!"
User avatar #433 - fyaq (06/28/2013) [+] (11 replies)
i was ******* my girl the other day when i stuck it in her ass and she yelled "STOP!"

it really startled me

i mean, my gosh.
my daughters first words.
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