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Life skills

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Views: 45511
Favorited: 330
Submitted: 03/04/2013
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Comments(130):

[ 130 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#42 - leobreacker (03/04/2013) [-]
Old Guy's FW
#40 - badgerbaiting (03/04/2013) [-]
>Be me
>Dad tells me about a game he used to play as a kid.
>One knife two people, both standing facing each other and throw the knife so it lands point down between your partners legs.
> Every time you succeed in getting a point, your partner shuffles his feet inwards.
>Loser is the first to bitch out.
>My best mate and I decide this is a great idea, and so try it out (7 year olds) while we're unattended at my place.
>Get to the point were we both have our legs less than shoulder width a part.
>I throw, it goes through his shoe just in between his big and second toe.
>He starts laughing, hysterically or not I can't tell.
>Mum walks in, sees knife "through" his foot and him in hysterics.
HFW

Long story short, I wasn't invited around to his house for a while.
#17 - canadafag (03/04/2013) [-]
Old man's fw
Old man's fw
User avatar #110 to #17 - mahnamesjakers (03/05/2013) [-]
I knew I wasn't the only one who thought of this.
#85 to #17 - thereasonableperso (03/05/2013) [-]
Oldman is spy.
#58 - pensivepangolin (03/05/2013) [-]
I could only picture Clint
#48 - Rascal (03/05/2013) [-]
The old man reminds me of Hub and Garth from Secondhand Lions. They're elderly veterans with an adventurous past, including serving in a war (I forget which). There's one scene in the movie where the brothers and their nephew stop at a diner for lunch and there's a group of teens acting tough. One of the brothers attempts to teach them a lesson, but they start a fight with him instead. When one of the teens pulls a knife, the brother takes it from him and beats their asses single handed.

TL;DR Elderly people can be badass and Secondhand Lions is a good story.
User avatar #75 to #48 - jalthelas (03/05/2013) [-]
I ******* love that movie.
#83 to #48 - mytrakytra (03/05/2013) [-]
That movie was one of the bests.
That movie was one of the bests.
#51 to #48 - murmurmark (03/05/2013) [-]
**** yeah Robert Duvall and Michael Caine.
#95 - illegalartist (03/05/2013) [-]
nice advertising
#31 - peyko (03/04/2013) [-]
User avatar #8 - karmaghost (03/04/2013) [-]
You should have killed him and stolen his power.
User avatar #39 to #8 - lupislord (03/04/2013) [-]
One does not simply

kill a prime alpha
User avatar #79 to #39 - rokkarokkaali (03/05/2013) [-]
Sneak attack for 30x damage.
User avatar #24 to #8 - deezknuts (03/04/2013) [-]
Why does this only have 2 thumbs?
#64 to #8 - Visual (03/05/2013) [-]
I wonder what loot he drops.
#56 - ningenpoop (03/05/2013) [-]
creds old man
#90 to #56 - buthow (03/05/2013) [-]
Feels every time.
User avatar #100 to #90 - trollolololgabe (03/05/2013) [-]
wait if he was helping that guy up/carrying him why is he down a few feet away? What happened?
User avatar #102 to #100 - buthow (03/05/2013) [-]
He probably went back to get him and found out he was gone. Then he tried getting back from gun fire, but not being able to make it. Or so it seems.
User avatar #107 to #102 - trollolololgabe (03/05/2013) [-]
oh okay thanks
#109 to #107 - buthow (03/05/2013) [-]
No problem.
User avatar #111 to #109 - ningenpoop (03/05/2013) [-]
I was thinking about joining the forces myself
#118 to #111 - buthow (03/05/2013) [-]
Big decision, I'm a bit too young to join, but I'm considering it. Either way, you're still awesome.
#34 - alawabidingcitizen (03/04/2013) [-]
Old guy's FW
Old guy's FW
#3 - thecommittee (03/04/2013) [-]
the prime alpha.
#94 - bluelightbebop (03/05/2013) [-]
> I realize that i am sitting in the presence of the Prime Alpha.

Been there.
Some guy was counting his money up in a McDonalds, lots of 1 and 10 bills.
He looks like **** , not shaven, kinda dirty and with greasy hair pointing in all directions. (No dirty clothes though, just wrinkled.)
Then, someone approaches him and tells him "We don't wan't beggars to hang around here, i'm sorry, but i need you to go, you are scaring the costumers".

He takes the money and puts in in his pocket.

"My daughter gives me some dollars, sometimes up to 10 dollars for every time she goes to chemo, she says she's paying me the days i haven't been able to go to work because i have to take care of her, She is eating again, and she wants an Apple pie, so please, get me one and i'l be on my way sir."

The McDonalds guy looks pale, and just gets what the dude needs. Then his phone rings and he just solemnly stares at the ground for a few seconds, muttering "I see... Thank you, no, that's alright, yes... Bye."

He faces the Mc Donalds dude, that already has the Apple Pie in hand, saying "Is that all sir?"

Epicdude replies "I'm sorry, i won't be needing it anymore. I'm sorry for the trouble, have a nice day." with a big smile, reddish eyes.

MFW i later heard that she died that day.

Why is he a Prime Alpha? Because he didn't ****** up the Mc Donalds dude and wasn't rude even when his daughter died. (Just felt like sharing...)

T:;DR: Epic Manly feels and manners n **** .
#116 to #94 - Rascal (03/05/2013) [-]
thats a cool story an all but howd you hear about his daughter dying if you didnt know him?
User avatar #121 to #116 - bluelightbebop (03/05/2013) [-]
He's a friend of Mom's.


Seen the guy 2 or 3 times around the Neighborhood... Seen the girl as well.
#74 - cupotruth (03/05/2013) [-]
Old guy's FW
#80 - swimmingprodigy (03/05/2013) [-]
holy **** OP, did you run into this guy?
#81 to #80 - swimmingprodigy (03/05/2013) [-]
wait, you said jet-black hair. This one?
#49 - puccypirateisback **User deleted account** (03/05/2013) [-]
>VFW jacket
User avatar #5 - soulstealerr (03/04/2013) [-]
I wish that every time some idiot yelled YOLO, an elderly armed forces vet would oblige them.
#69 - guyandface (03/05/2013) [-]
Old mans face when
#18 - GShock (03/04/2013) [-]
Kid sounds like someone I knew, even the physical description. he always bragged about how much of a player he was, how he was a pickup artist, how he was in an amateur porn, and just on and on about all the models he dated and the nude pics girls text him. There was this one time me and this one guy were talking about the movie Kickass, and out of nowhere this kid comes in with "I can do butterfly knives better than the little girl." I sincerely hope this story involved that 			******		...   
   
<MFW he compares himself to a movie.
Kid sounds like someone I knew, even the physical description. he always bragged about how much of a player he was, how he was a pickup artist, how he was in an amateur porn, and just on and on about all the models he dated and the nude pics girls text him. There was this one time me and this one guy were talking about the movie Kickass, and out of nowhere this kid comes in with "I can do butterfly knives better than the little girl." I sincerely hope this story involved that ****** ...

<MFW he compares himself to a movie.
User avatar #123 to #18 - thatnerdyguy (03/05/2013) [-]
Please tell me someone eventually told him off.
User avatar #135 to #123 - GShock (03/05/2013) [-]
No, but someone accused his "Alpha" stories of being his way of hiding the fact that he was gay. That was a sore spot, apparently, which people would push on occasionally, which drove him to quit and find a new job.

Seriously, this guy was trying to convince me to make a porn website for him, featuring him banging girls all around Europe. Told him all the flaws of his plan, but he saw it as me trying to help him out. He would talk about how he hangs out with master pickup artists, traveled around the world, and (just because I mentioned that I went to Knotfest a couple weeks before) that he was at the Ozzfest where Ozzy bit the head off of a bat, and the one he bit the head off of a dove.
#87 - alooshka (03/05/2013) [-]
I could almost swear that kid is my neighbor. The dumb 			****		 makes up stories about getting in fights all the time. In one of those fights he says he was shot, but he still won the fight by beating up the other guy with his bare hands.    
MFW my friend fell for it and started dating him.
I could almost swear that kid is my neighbor. The dumb **** makes up stories about getting in fights all the time. In one of those fights he says he was shot, but he still won the fight by beating up the other guy with his bare hands.
MFW my friend fell for it and started dating him.
#91 to #87 - Dwarf (03/05/2013) [-]
**Dwarf rolled a random image posted in comment #843671 at Friendly ** Was your friend a guy?
**Dwarf rolled a random image posted in comment #843671 at Friendly ** Was your friend a guy?
#93 to #87 - Nameloc (03/05/2013) [-]
Why the 			****		 would she date him?   
   
If she's that gullible, you could say you killed a bear with your hands at the age of 2, and make her believe it.
Why the **** would she date him?

If she's that gullible, you could say you killed a bear with your hands at the age of 2, and make her believe it.
#53 - stirfryfriday (03/05/2013) [-]
check out the ad i got when reading this xD
User avatar #59 to #53 - daphuq (03/05/2013) [-]
Alright David.
#73 to #53 - elmexicangato (03/05/2013) [-]
Hahaha. Me too.
User avatar #54 to #53 - darkseidrules (03/05/2013) [-]
Why are you watching Viva PInata?
#55 to #54 - stirfryfriday (03/05/2013) [-]
BDouble00 is the commentator, he makes any game worth watching haha
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