so i decided to cook some eggs this morning, oh but not just any eggs.
what you do is draw eyes on the eggs, no silly expressions or nothing, but eyes that can only stare straight ahead. then you position them around the stove (cardboard tubing helps) and you make them watch as you fry up there brothers.
for extra flavor the next time around point at one of the eggs and tell him "your next" thin put him back in the fridge for tomorrow. he will spend the remainder of his existence in constant fear. mmm mmmm tasty.