italian master race reporting in!. Origin wecapo's 9gag account... Grazie!. Two Men And A Woman On a group of beautiful deserted islands in the middle of nowher jew
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italian master race reporting in!. Origin wecapo's 9gag account... Grazie!. Two Men And A Woman On a group of beautiful deserted islands in the middle of nowher

Origin wecapo's 9gag account... Grazie!

Tags: jew
Two Men And A Woman
On a group of beautiful deserted islands in
the middle of nowhere, the following people
are stranded:
Two Italian men and one Italian woman
Two French men and one French woman
Two German men and one German woman
Two Greek men and one Greek woman
Two English men and one English woman
Two Bulgarian men and one Bulgarian woman
Two Japanese men and one Japanese woman
Two Chinese men and one Chinese woman
Two American men and one American woman
Two Irish men and one Irish woman
One month later on these absolutely
stunning deserted islands in the middle of
nowhere, the following things have
occurred:
a One Italian man killed the other Italian man
for the Italian woman.
The two French men and the French
woman are living happily together in a
The two German men have a strict weekly
schedule of alternating visits with the
German woman.
The two Greek men are sleeping with each
other and the Greek woman is cleaning and
cooking for them.
The two English men are waiting for
someone to introduce them to the English
woman.
The two Bulgarian men took one long look
at the endless ocean and another long look
at the Bulgarian woman and started
swimming.
o The two Japanese men have emailed Tokyo
and are awaiting instructions.
o The two Chinese men have set up a
convenience
store/ restaurant/ laundry, and have gotten
the woman pregnant in order to supply
employees for their store.
The two American men are contemplating
the virtues of suicide, because the
American woman keeps on complaining
about her body, the true nature of
feminism, how she can do everything they
can do, the necessity of fulfillment, the
equal division of household chores, how
sand and palm trees make her look fat, how
her last boyfriend respected her opinion
and treated her nicer than they do, all the
sales she' s missing, how her relationship
with her mother is improving, and how at
least the taxes are low and it isn' t raining.
The American woman, meanwhile, watches
the men fart and scratch.
o The two Irish men divided the island into
North and South and set up a distillery.
They do not remember it sex is in the
picture because it gets sort of foggy after
the first few liters of coconut whiskey. But
they' re satisfied, because at least the
English aren' t having any fun.
...
+1143
Views: 38515 Submitted: 06/29/2014
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[ 139 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
User avatar #106 - perform
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [+] (1 reply)
stickied by wecapo
What about the Japanese woman?
User avatar #107 to #106 - evilanakie
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
squid rape
#3 - doomeythekink
Reply +285 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
>Americans not making guns out of sand and bamboo to give freedoms. 0/10Thats sarcasm incase you're retarded.
>Americans not making guns out of sand and bamboo to give freedoms. 0/10Thats sarcasm incase you're retarded.
User avatar #92 to #3 - rottenman
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
The island didn´t have oil
#93 to #3 - sspacecore
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
User avatar #101 to #3 - billywonka
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
mythbufters asctually deplyed the fact that you could make a gun out of sand and bamboos
#120 to #3 - anon id: 1ce6185b
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
...thats not sarcastic in the slightest.
#91 to #3 - kamikazikraut
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Pew pew pew
#89 to #3 - traelos
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
>Americans not already having guns on them when they got to the island

It's like you hate freedom.
#1 - robuntu
Reply +51 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Honest question - do people outside of the US ever think, 'Man, I'd love to date an American woman?' Or do people really think of them as portrayed in this post?
#6 to #1 - anon id: e8769840
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Short answer no
User avatar #7 to #1 - solidderking
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
i never thought about datin an american woman, but you could replease american with almost any other country that doesn't border germany except sweden or spain or russia ( which borders prussia which is germany )

User avatar #44 to #1 - shakalakaboomboom
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I wouldn't, for the fact that I really hate the accent sorry however if an American Supermodel asked me out I wouldn't say no. I just wouldn't go out of my way for one
User avatar #48 to #44 - thebaseballexpert
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
to what accent are you refering? the southern drawl? the Boston accent where they apparently don't know the letter R? the slow speaking of the midwest? The New-yorker accent where they pronounce vowels harder than they should be? the pretentious California way that they speak? the big-talking boisterous Texas talking?
User avatar #86 to #48 - reginleif
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
"pretentious Californian" :/ I literally have never heard this in California outside of LA.
User avatar #97 to #86 - thebaseballexpert
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
have you ever been to San-Fran and "Silicon Valley"?
User avatar #98 to #97 - reginleif
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I liveive there (SF) , know some buds who are working start ups. Yes they're assholes over there, but the accent itself is normal enough. :/

The Californian accent is pretty nice compared to the grunting going on in the Midwest, or the Texan Yeehadi dialect. :/
#112 to #98 - kungfulouie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Wait, your saying the "Oh Em Gee, like totally Sarah, it was like, ugh. You know? Like, I totally can't even" is better then almost any other accent? The midwest has like 3 different accents. The ones that come to mind are the Chicago, the Fargo/Canadian, and the like Nebraskan. All 3 are better than Valley Girl imo, though in it's defense, it probably helps a lot coming out of a California valley girl's mouth. But holy **** dude, I can't stand that accent. Although you do get points for the stoner surfer accent, because it's like, totally chill bro.
User avatar #113 to #112 - reginleif
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Neither of which are a realistic depiction of Californian accents... Valley girl is exaggerated.

Basically the guys on the news are pretty much the closest thing I can find that compares with the California accent..... it's doesn't stretch syllables, or stress vowels. It's just understandable. :/

Really the worst thing that came out of California is "hella", which is of course hella gay.
#114 to #113 - kungfulouie
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I believe you. And not to be completely disagreeable, but I have to admit, I think any southern accent out of those southern belles is just sexy as hell. You ever had one of those soft, warm southern waitresses? Leaning over with a summer skirt on, asking "What can I get for you today sugar? Sure thing honey, anything else?" I'll be damned if I don't have to hold back the urge to get lost in her eyes right there. That accent always was one of my favorites.
User avatar #122 to #114 - reginleif
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
You play dirty, bringing up the Southern girls. ;/

User avatar #124 to #122 - kungfulouie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Reminded me of this song

www.youtube.com/watch?v=slUIDNUnbO4
#125 to #112 - anon id: 9f7e6f0a
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I live in LA and absolutely nobody speaks like that ever, it's all ******** popularized by old movies that everyone decided was how we actually speak for some reason
User avatar #128 to #125 - kungfulouie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Log in and say that like a Valley girl anon. There was already a whole conversation about that. Though to be fair as culture normally dictates, I bet certain aspects of the dialect blended into the valley strictly because of the tendency for high schoolers to emulate pop culture. A popular movie speaks like that, kids emulate it, more movies are made, more kids copy, ad nauseum. Not ver batum of course, but like, you know, kinda sorta.
User avatar #50 to #48 - shakalakaboomboom
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
With that list you just answered the question for me
All of the accents
#47 to #1 - anon id: bb6cfbf8
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
As a Canadian, we have enough foreigners here that I would never have to leave my province to see the entire world.
#57 to #1 - anon id: f0601da1
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Bonge here, I don't find US accents sexy.
I'd much prefer a French woman...
#62 to #1 - anon id: 101d5a95
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I'm american and I never think about dating a foreign woman.
User avatar #111 to #1 - captainpatters
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I find american accents on women unbearable.
User avatar #119 to #1 - suikerpapa
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
there is no such thing as "an american" woman. It's just a white chick.
User avatar #123 to #1 - jouten
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I... really never thought about it. But I don't think I ever had the urge of dating an american woman.
#5 to #1 - pitifulsoul
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
I heard that the biggest appeal American men and women have in Japan is that they're "something different".
A Caucasian American male/female with black hair would be pretty meh in Japan, but a Caucasian American male/female with blonde hair would be different, therefore popular.
However, both the black-haired and blonde-haired Americans wouldn't even be in the same league as an African American male/female in Japan.
User avatar #115 to #5 - kungfulouie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
So wait. What about blue eyes? I bet I could drown in hot asian women. So ******* awesome. I pick one with straight teeth though, and ask them not to squeek during sex.
#42 to #5 - anon id: 1ad31b74
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Are you delusional?

Black people are subjected to incredible racism in Japan.
User avatar #43 to #42 - pitifulsoul
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
And incredible interest.

It's sort of double-edged...
User avatar #59 to #1 - narcomancer
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
i wanna put my penus in jada stevens
#10 to #1 - mcferryn
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
I dont think that because i met american women. Some of them are too crazy to date, and the rest is too damn ugly to date.
#17 to #10 - anon id: 7f274658
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
your encyclopedic knowledge has touched me deeply.
User avatar #65 to #1 - masterchieflol
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
American celebrities but not your average American woman..At least not here in Australia where our women are pretty similar just with a cooler accent.
User avatar #11 to #1 - Einsty
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Eurofag here, I met a few. If there would be a reason not to want to date an american girl, it might be because there's just so many of them, as USA and North America in extention is seen as one seamless lump from the old continent. (This would apply to china and russia as well)

That being said, after a number of brief conversations, I'm led to believe there are not only personal differences as anywhere else in the world (maybe except best korea) but also clear distinctions between parts of the US itself, eg. the south, east coast etc.
Anyway, every american I've met so far was a pleasant person.
And to answer the question personaly, I don't really consider nationality a factor here. Less and less factors for me in fact, the lonelier I get.
User avatar #13 to #1 - mummyslittlebitch
Reply +26 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
As someone with an American sister, and who knows many American women, I can say that while many American women "can hang" better than their European counterparts, they also seem to suffer from delusions when it comes to life expectations and dating.
User avatar #14 to #13 - mummyslittlebitch
Reply +18 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
And they neurotically talk about themselves a lot.
#2 to #1 - youxbarstard
Reply +136 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Thought about it for a while, then I realized I was just thinking about wanting to **** Alexis Texas.
User avatar #52 to #2 - imyourdaddy
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
talk about a very "American" pornstar
#4 - Maroon
Reply +107 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Lost my **** at the Bulgarian one
Lost my **** at the Bulgarian one
#36 - Indoknight
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
What's wrong with Bulgarian women? European Union pls explain
#37 to #36 - silenttortoise
Reply +86 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Hubba hubba.
User avatar #38 to #37 - Indoknight
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Oh...
User avatar #53 to #38 - warzon
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
**warzon begins to swim**
User avatar #138 to #38 - hattheifbatman
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(07/01/2014) [-]
I really hope that she won't move to us
#39 to #38 - silenttortoise
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Also...
These are the most popular girls' names in Bulgaria for 2010:
Marija
Ivanka (I wanka)
Elena
Jordanka (you're dank, uh?)
Penka (this one just sounds dirty)
Marijka
Rosica
Daniela (a normal name! Reserved for the 1% of normal Bulgarian women)
Petja (Pete? Ja.)
Desislava (Dis is lava?)
(from babynamewizard.com)
User avatar #56 to #39 - gongthehawkeye
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Elena's a nice name.
User avatar #40 to #39 - Indoknight
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I can't stop saying Disislava with a retared accent lol
#49 to #40 - thebaseballexpert
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Dis meat-a-ball is-a so a-spicy, I-a think desislave
#41 to #40 - silenttortoise
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I see my job here is officially done then.
#117 to #37 - anon id: 02381325
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
What's wrong with them?
#9 - ninjabadger
Reply +50 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Irish one was spot on
Irish one was spot on
#54 to #9 - anon id: bc86af2c
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
not really about the borders bit...
User avatar #60 to #9 - kelping
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I hate that gif.
#80 to #60 - ninjabadger
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
Well, sorry to agitate you with that sexy pouring.
Well, sorry to agitate you with that sexy pouring.
#8 - grama
Reply +32 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Bulgaria mentioned on funnyjunk
swell with pride and eat sarma
User avatar #12 to #8 - ariplayer
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
ooh i just googled sarma, and we also eat that (im kurdish). but we call it Dolma.
User avatar #16 to #12 - matakeshi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
We also eat those here in Lithuania, they are called "balandeliai" which if translated directly means little pidgeons
User avatar #46 to #8 - kristovsky
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
She was a gypsy and stole all the men's shiny's.
User avatar #18 to #8 - huffe
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
*smegma
#79 to #18 - konradkurze
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
did you just say Smeg?
User avatar #23 to #18 - windson
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
you tink you are smart or something
User avatar #82 - enclavexremnant
Reply +17 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I feel like the author has had some bad experiences in the past with American women.
User avatar #88 to #82 - tiredofthis
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
I will say that, though I love my girlfriend, many of these issues are absolutely true.
User avatar #99 to #82 - brokenhalf
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
alot of the american women are usually pretty good, but you get the people that just can't except the fact that they aren't special stars, and basically throw an adult tantrum
User avatar #19 - rollmeanddie
Reply +15 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Good lord the Irish one is true.
User avatar #15 - insertsfunnyname
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
I have a sudden urge to move to Greece.
User avatar #20 to #15 - TheHutchie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Give it a few years. The economy's rough out there.

That or find a rich boyfriend with many women cooking and cleaning, and ride it out nice and easy.
User avatar #21 to #20 - insertsfunnyname
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Rich Boyfriend is all I ever wanted, and people to cook and clean is just the cherry on top :3
User avatar #22 to #21 - TheHutchie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Meanwhile I'm stuck here with a girlfriend who just lost her job, and since we can't live together due to lack of money, nobody cooks and cleans for me...

Where's the non-gay version of Greece? I need a new, richer girlfriend who cooks and cleans.
User avatar #24 to #22 - insertsfunnyname
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Meh, that must be **** :-/

You could probably do fairly well in parts of South America, if you take drug dealing to be an option.
User avatar #25 to #24 - TheHutchie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
It's okay, she's really nice and out-of-my-league cute. Not the brightest bulb on the light fitting, but hey, nobody's perfect.

**** South America, there are some seriously ****** up people in those parts. I'm talking Far Cry 3 style sex and drug trafficking, murdering psychopaths. I've watched too many documentaries about the gangs there.
User avatar #26 to #25 - insertsfunnyname
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
It's good to stay hopeful I guess

Um... Cyprus isn't really doing any better is it? Italy seems to be doing okay...
User avatar #27 to #26 - TheHutchie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Lots of corrupt authorities in Cyprus. Italy seems like a nice place.

Or Spain. If you get rich in Spain you can do whatever you want so long as you bribe the right people.
User avatar #28 to #27 - insertsfunnyname
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
I thought Spain's economy had gone to **** to, or maybe just for some of the population...
User avatar #29 to #28 - TheHutchie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Yeah, we live in difficult times I guess. I think I'll stick to my current life.
User avatar #30 to #29 - insertsfunnyname
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Well theatrically it should pick up in the coming years.
User avatar #31 to #30 - TheHutchie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Technically, and I stress technically, the USA, Germany and the UK are now officially out of the recession. It won't make much of a difference to anything but a few economical figures for some time though.
User avatar #33 to #31 - insertsfunnyname
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
I guess it's something, my understanding is that a lot of the worse of it is gone (or will be soonish).
User avatar #34 to #33 - TheHutchie
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
We'll see, my friend. We'll see.
User avatar #35 to #34 - insertsfunnyname
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/29/2014) [-]
Hopefully at least.
User avatar #95 to #15 - basicargentinian
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
das gei
#55 - jokersaysamuseme
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(06/30/2014) [-]
As a person from London, I can confirm the English outcome as accurate.