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Worth the read 2

Adelaide. South
discuss this matte: as scan as possible,
Helen Bailey
From: David Thaine
Date: Thursday 21 May BEDS “IDA Sam
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Pets in the building
Dear Helen,
Thankyou fer War letter concerning pets in my apartment. I understand that having dogs in the apartment
is a Violation cf the agreement due ta the comfort and wellbeing cf my neighbours and I am currently
my apartment with egg cartons as I realise my dogs can carea quite a bit cf noise.
Especially during feeding time when I release live rabbits.
Regards, David.
From: Helen Bailey
Date: Thursday 21 May BEDS 11 it Sam
To: David Theme
Subject: Re: Pets in the building
Hello David
I have received War email and wish ta remind Wu that the strata agreement states that ) animals are
allowed in the building regardless cf if year apartment is soundproof. Haw many dogs do yea have at the
premises?
Helen
From: David Theme
Date: Thursday 21 May BEDS 1 .
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Re: Re: Pets in the building
Dear Helen,
Currently I only have eight dogs but cna is expecting puppies and I am very excited by this. I am hoping far
a litter cf at least ten as this is the number required ta participate in dog sled racing. I have read every Jack
Landan novel in preparation and have uninstructed my awn sled fram timber I fram the
site ecrire the road during the night. I have devised a plan which I feel will ensure me taking
first place in the next national dog sled championships. For the first year cf the puppies life I intend ta say
the ward mush then chase them violently around the apartment while yelling and hitting saucepan lids
tegether. I have estimated that the cf my apartment should black cat at least sixty percent
cf the noise and the dogs will learn ta associate the ward mush with great fear ea when I yell it an race
day, the panic and released adrenaline will spur them an ta being winners. I am ea confidant cf this being
a foolproof plan that I intend ta sell all my furniture the day before the race and bet the proceeds an
coming first place.
Regards, David.
From: Helen Bailey
Date: Friday 22 May BEDS 9.
To: David Thaine
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building
David, I am unpure what ta make cf War email. Dc Wu have pets in the apartment nct?
Helen
From: David Thaine
Date: Friday 22 May BEDS 11 Item
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building
Dear Helen,
No. I have a goldfish but due ta the air in my apartment being stuck an a conetent twa degrees
celcius, the water in its bawl is iced war and he has nct mcafee far a while ea I do nct think he is capable
cf disturbing the neighbours. The ducks in the bathroom are nct mine. The noise which my neighbours
possibly far a dog in the apartment is just the looping tape I have cf dogs barking which I play at
high while I am at wark ta deter potential burglars fram breaking in and stealing my tupperware. I
need it ta keep fckd fresh. Once I ate leftover chinees that had been kept in an unhealed container and I
experienced complete awareness. The next night Itried eating it again but only experienced chest pains
and diarrhoea.
Regards, David.
From: Helen Bailey
Date: Friday 22 May BEDS 1 .
To: David Thaine
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building
Hello David
ecu cannot play earnie cf dogs any name at a that disturbs athore. I am sure Wu can
appreciate that these rules are far the benefit cf all residents cf the building. Fish are fine. ecu cannot
have ducks in the apartment though. If it wae small birds that warld be ck.
Helen
From: David Thaine
Date: Friday 22 May BEDS 2.
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building
Dear Helen,
They are very small ducks.
Regards, David.
From: Helen Bailey
Date: Friday 22 May BEDS 4.
To: David Thaine
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building
David, under section it cf the strata residency agreement it states that Wu cannot have pets. ecu agreed
ta these rules when Wu signed the ferme. These rules are set cut ta benefit everyone in the building
including yourself. Dc Wu have a telephone number I can call Wu an ta discuss?
Helen
From: David Thaine
Date: Friday 22 May BEDS 5.
To: Helen Bailey
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building
Dear Helen,
The ducks will ) doubt be flying far the winter accn ea it will nct be an issue. It is probably far the
best as they are nct getting along very wall with my seventeen cats anyway. .
Regards, David.
From: Helen Bailey
Date: Monday 25 May BEDS S.
To: David Thaine
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Pets in the building
David, I am just going ta write an the ferme that we have investigated and Wu do nct have any pets.
Helen
...
+1118
Views: 48010
Favorited: 320
Submitted: 09/09/2010
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Comments(163):

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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#34 - paulp (09/09/2010) [+] (2 replies)
#100 - anonymous (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
epic win...mush my piggy MUSH!!!
epic win...mush my piggy MUSH!!!
#130 - ruthlessly (09/10/2010) [-]
Successful troll is successful
#39 - RaughOutRoud (09/09/2010) [-]
I give you the seal of awesomeness my good sir!
#35 - TheFJAmbassador **User deleted account** (09/09/2010) [-]
you deserve this more than the pope does!
User avatar #127 - hahahaheidi (09/10/2010) [+] (2 replies)
******* right
#107 - TreesyDoesIt (09/10/2010) [-]
like a boss
#78 - rugbyfan (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Dear Helen, they are very small ducks...hahahaha
Dear Helen, they are very small ducks...hahahaha
#124 - shadowhawk (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
User avatar #125 to #124 - TreesyDoesIt (09/10/2010) [-]
your loss mate its worth the read
#55 - Letitfly **User deleted account** (09/10/2010) [-]
David. You are officially a ******* beast.
User avatar #1 - ChaoticBeast (09/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
post theone he tryes to pay the bank account with a drawing
#70 - nobbleee (09/10/2010) [-]
"they are very small ducks"
#67 - jjholt (09/10/2010) [-]
He actually made her lie so she wouldn't have to deal with him anymore


******* EPICNESS SQUARED
#176 - anonymous (09/10/2010) [-]
good job sir i applaud you
good job sir i applaud you
#115 - anonymous (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahaha **** yea.
#16 - CaptainPlanet **User deleted account** (09/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
I'm torn. =\
These are funny, but this was one was certainly a recoast. I think it's still sunny, but I dunno.
#26 to #16 - SchizoJester (09/09/2010) [-]
recoast to recoast.
#172 - Agentnineteen (09/10/2010) [-]
I have looping tapes of goldfish barking to deter robbers.

I've been robbed 8 times now...
#138 - MYBIGPEEPEE **User deleted account** (09/10/2010) [-]
rofl, "For te first year of the puppies' lives i intend to say mush and then chase them around violently while yelling and hitting sausepans together."
#14 - NIMDAEHTMAI (09/09/2010) [-]
its ok, the ducks in the bathroom arent his
[ 163 comments ]
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