Actual Court Transcripts 2. Part five here:<br /> funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/945749/Actual+Court+Transcripts+5/<br /> Part four here:<br />  court transcript stupid people poop in a bucket
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Actual Court Transcripts 2

Part five here:<br />
funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/945749/Actual+Court+Transcripts+5/<br />
Part four here:<br />
funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/945661/Actual+Court+Transcripts+4/<br />
Part one here: funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/943207/Actual+Court+Transcripts<br />
Part three here:<br />
funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/944554/Actual+Court+Transcripts+3/<br />
Random Thoughts:<br />
funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/944980/Random+Thoughts/<br />
Original Content<br />
Source: The Gigantic Bathroom Reader made by the Bathroom Readers Institute.

ACTUAL COURT TRANSCRIPTS 2
Q: Do you wear a bathing suit now that
you have a scar'?
A: I don' t wear a bathing suit at all now.
Q: That can be taken two ways.
Judge (to jury): If that be your verdict, so say you all.
Two Jurors: 'You all.
Q: Doctor, will you take a look at those Sprays and
tell us something about the injury'?
Q: How would you expect somebody to react, being
stabbed six times in this fashion'?
A: Well, it might slow him down a little.
Q: And what did he do then'?
A: He came home, and next morning he was dead.
Q: So when he woke up the next morning he was dead'?
Q: Can you describe the individual'?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male or a female'?
Q: When she went, had you gone and had she, if she
wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding
all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he
have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to
the station'?
DA: Objection. That question should be taken out
and shot.
Q: Was that the same nose you broke as a child'?
A: I only have one, you know.
Q: Were you alone or by yourself'?
Q: What is the meaning of sperm being present'?
A: It indicates intercourse.
Q: Male sperm'?
A: That is the only kind I know.
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Submitted: 09/09/2010
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Comments(58):

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#10 - dagav (09/10/2010) [+] (2 replies)
Comment Picture
#14 - EpicEmoKitteh **User deleted account** (09/10/2010) [+] (2 replies)
These guys should be banned from existence for being so stupid.
These guys should be banned from existence for being so stupid.
#19 - bigken (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
You can't a wake up dead.

Unless, your a zombie.
+17
#5 - NomdePlume **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (4 replies)
User avatar #26 - CarlosSpicyWeiners (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Man you cant wake up dead?

Unless, you a zombie!
User avatar #22 - ThatUnknownGuy (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
were you alone or by yourself??

i dunno, lol.
#3 - Crusader (09/10/2010) [+] (5 replies)
Im the DA, and I agree that question should be shot
#51 - anonymous (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
#52 to #51 - PEDOBEARKIDS (09/10/2010) [-]
yep hes new go to it and thumb it down
User avatar #30 - ColeTheUber (09/10/2010) [+] (4 replies)
1) A horrible beach accident caused her two-piece to be split, along with the scar-causing accident. It left her traumatized, and now she cant wear bathing suits.
2) The Jurors came from Canada (the only excuse).
3) The doctor means which side of the body is he using in the trial.
4) The man being stabbed was full of natural adrenaline, and so continued on, albeit more slowly, after being stabbed.
5) A simple typing error. Instead of the first "he", it should be "she".
6) The bearded lady at the local carnival.
7) "If you had both gone, instead of just her, would you have gone with him?"
8) With the level of plastic surgery these days, one can be uncertain.
9) Multiple Personality Disorder.
10) "Male Sperm" can mean the difference between
#34 to #30 - yaminotoncod (09/10/2010) [-]
youre a buzzkill. and your last sentence is incomplete
User avatar #6 - rosebud (09/10/2010) [-]
lawyers r so ***** dumb
#48 - AresGoW (09/10/2010) [-]
I'll take the case!
#1 - MocaShakaKahn **User deleted account** (09/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Holy Crap!!! PLZ Make More!!!

Pic is what I looked like when i read them.
User avatar #43 - TheMilkshake (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
does the DA stand for dumbass or defense atourney (or something else).
#28 - rugbyfan (09/10/2010) [-]
hahaha
hahaha
+2
#55 - angryrock **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #42 - adip (09/10/2010) [-]
Whats the fifth one?
User avatar #37 - SteelersGurl (09/10/2010) [-]
I had to read the 7th one like 20 times.
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