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From: George Lewie
Date: Thursday 2 September 2010 . 51 pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Ne Subject
I haye read your website and it is obviously that your a foggot.
From: David Theme
Date: Thursday 2 September 2010 8.
To: George Lewie
Subject: Re: No Subject
Dear George,
Thank you fer your email. While I heye no idea what a foggot is, I will
aesome it is a term of endearment and appreciate you taking time out
from calculating launch trajectories or removing temporal lobe tamera to
sentret me with such. I have attached a signed photo as per your
request.
Regards, David.
From: George Lewie
Date: Thursday 2 September 2010 8.
Te: David Thorne
Re: No Subject
I didnt ask for a. phote fag. and I meant faggot you homo. not a "fan m
you ean shove your s. inned photo up your am. Sou would probably
enjoy that. LGL!!!! Ge suck your boyfriends dick in a gay club.
From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 2 September 2010 9.
To: George Lewie
Re: Re: Re: No Subject
Dear George,
While I do not haye a boyfriend, I do have a friend who ls homosexual.
and I onee asked him "Do you ever think about having sex with me
becauae you are gay?" to whim he replied "Do you ever think about
having sex with Home G' Donne's because you are straight? Same thing."
If I wae inclined to have a boyfriend, I would select one my height and
weight to save having to readjust the driver'. s seat position. I am not
interested in doubling my wardrobe as I wear the same outfit everyday
testate speedy identification should I ever be in a boating accident.
Although I have never been to a gay club. as such, when I wae about
ten, a friend and I a epub house in my backyard wing timber
stolen from a building site down the street. Our epub, whim we named
The Kiss Club' due to a certain band being popular at the time, employed
an intensive entry exam' in whim the applicant had to know all the
werde to Laye Gun and not be a girl. As we had no other friends and
knew no girls apart from my sister, this. made eenie at the time. The next
day after school, having managed to recruit several new members by
promising laminated membership cards and changing the entry ex' em to
knowing the namee of the band members', we all rode tama place to
in our first club meeting only to discover my sister, outraged
by the 'no girls' rule and armed with four Wee of paint left ayer from a
meant bedroom redesign, had painted the clubhouse pink and added 'ing'
to the end of the word ‘Klee.
Also, despite your inference, I have managed, up to this point, to
putting meet thing? in my bottom. Primarily dye to the possibility that I
might enjoy it, get carried away, and move on to watermelons or midsize
family autos. When I wae about eight, I drew a face on my hand and
practiced kissing it which I will admit is a little gay. I also think there
would be advantaged to homosexuality such as Abercrombie 8 Fitch
reward pointe, successful eeugh fabric relection capabilities and the gift
of dance. With or without atop en. This would aome in extremely useful
if I needed tive hundred dollard and eaw a poster advertising a dance
competion with a first prize of five. hundred dollard.
Regarde, David.
From: George Lewie
Date: Thursday 2 September 2010 9.
Te: David Thorne
Re: Re: Rey, Re: No Subject
If you layd elope by gayjunk I would be ayer your place with tive friends
tonight.
From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 2 September 2010 10.
To: George Lewie
He: Re: He: Re: Re: No Subject
Dear George,
I knew we would get along well. We have only known each other for
one day and already you are organising a party. I am not sure where
Gayjunk . but if I did "lovd elope by" to it, I would definitely be up for that.
We eould all sit outside on banana lounges discussing the best way to
rebuild a WWD transmission and agree, through shared storied of
conquests supporting our assertions, that there is no basis to the
proposition that those least assured of their are the fired to
condemn othere for theirs. Although the ideal would be for eberyone to
be capable of Ieye without fear, restraint, or obligation, clearly this doee
not apply to homosexuals.
At no time during the night would you comment on how much you liked
my Abercrombie 8 Fitch parity or ask "' that a Marcel Breuer couch? I
Ieye the fabric relection" and when we danced, we would all Ievye our
tops en.
Regards, David.
From: George Lewie
Date: Friday 3 September 2010 1 .1
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: No Subject
no fag I live in Charleston west Virginia the best country in the world. I
waent eying it would be a party. we would smash your ******* skull in
and if you are calling me a fag you ean get fumed becasue I have a
girlfriend.
From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 3 September 2010 1 .
To: George Lewie
Subject: 'heehaw y' all
Dear George,
ls she also your sister? I checked out her photos on your Facebook
page and while she is not my type, I aceept that other people
have different preferences. Hen when those preferences include facial
tattier and stretch pande from sufficient material to shelter
a small village, And their livestock. Some men enjoy dancing with other
men without their tops on while othere prefer the company of a woman
two KFC family buckets away from upsetting the planet' s rotational axis.
I read somewhere that Eekzie' e prefer women of girth as it provides
warmth at night. I have seen the size of those ignore though and there is
no way your girlfriend would make it through the opening. you eould
probably just construed one around her and despite the hassle of having
to trudge out into the anew every day to catch and prepare the eighty
seals required to maintain her mass, it would be like a there.
If I were an Eskimo, I would build my Igloo next to a supermarket or on a
tropical beach.
Regards, David.
From: George Lewie
Date: Friday 3 September' 2010 2. 01 pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: 'heehaw y' all
She lent fat you fag. and that she got that tattoo is a teardrop becasue
her family is dead.
From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 3 September 2010 2.
Te: George Lewie
Re: 'heehaw y' all
Did she eat them?
From: George Lewie
Date: Friday 3 September' 2010 Cl.
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: 'heehaw wail
Get ****** fag her family they died in a road accident.
respect. Ge put aome more gel in your hair and dye it balck like a emo
skinny tag, And how ean you see my facebook page pictures?
From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 3 September 2010 3.
To: George Lewie
Dear George,
Yes, I have heard those motorhomes ean be a bitch to etter. Especially
around tight earners police chase or moonshine run.
I will concede to fifty percent of your description me as a "skinny tag"
being correct. If our bodies are temples, mine would be a headily shelled
Iranian morgue express. To rectify this, I have instigated a fitness and
weight training regime. Once a week I ealry two heavy garbage bags
out to the sidewalk and jog back. As this week wae my first session and
I did not want to ayer exert myself, Steek the ear. Obviously with a few
breaks in between to and stretch.
Although hardly an emo, I understand their pain. If I looked in the mirror
and eaw an anorexia version of Pugsly Adams staring back at me I
would probably start cutting myself as well, I will admit to having dyed
my hair onee though. The product, misrepresented as ‘Natural Black'
instead of 'Astro Boy black', turned my hair as dark as an adequate
Eimile describing just how black it actually wae and stained my forehead
and ears purple. In an attempt to blend the colour, I rubbed the remainder
of the mixture onto my face, figuring it might look like a tan. I spent the
following two weege telling people that I eould not Ievye the house due
to agoraphobia, an Illness usually by the unemployed m
an escuse to stay homeland masturbate or play .
ihate aleeve to your Facebook page due to the friendrequest you
accepted from the Oscar Wilde profile I yesterday. I
assumed the name would hold no relevance to you and, consistency
being the last refuge of the unimaginative, Itapeu Redeem wearing
baseball cap' into googie images to Idette a photo you would identify and
feel comfertable with.
Regards, David.
From: George Lewie
Date: Friday 3 September' 2010 4.
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: 'heehaw y' all
Thats fraud. I will report you to the police and to facebook fag. i would
meet you in the face with my .32 if you were here right now.
From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 3 September 2010 5.
Te: George Lewie
tarded
Dear George,
Yes, I' m tainly. certain there is a worldwide criminal Investigation network
dedicated solely to bringing those who construed fake Facebook profiles
to justice. I believe the punishment is tar and feathering in meet parts of
the world except Weet Virginia where you are stripped naked, oiled up
and chased around a paddock while wearing a pig mask.
Apparently in Weet Virginia., this is also known as a 'date'. Variations
include subs' sitution the paddock with a motorhome or the Perren with an
actual pig. in your case,. bahh.
Also, as it is probably far more acceptable for men in Weet Virginia to
hold guns than hands, I will aesome the term ‘meeting me in the face
with your .32 is not a euphemism.
Regards, David.
From: G. earge Lewie
Date: Friday 3 September 2010 7.
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: tarded
lye deleted you from my facebook and reported you. i hopeyou die of
aids fag. Dent bothering emailing me again becasue I went' reed it,
From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 3 September 2010 7.
To: George Lewie
Subject: dneck
fee you will.
From: George Lewie
Date: Friday Semptember 20. 10 7.
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: dneck
No I ******* went fag
...
+2078
Views: 68857
Favorited: 687
Submitted: 09/09/2010
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Comments(570):

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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#13 - ChaoticEvilReborn (09/09/2010) [-]
Don't bother emailing me again. I won't read it.

Yes you will.

No I ******* won't.
#52 - vitaminboy (09/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
that clever mother 						******					. who saw the subjects in the last few emails?  
Subject: tarded  
reply: Re:tarded  
subject:dneck  
reply: Re:dneck
that clever mother ****** . who saw the subjects in the last few emails?
Subject: tarded
reply: Re:tarded
subject:dneck
reply: Re:dneck
User avatar #11 - moviedude (09/09/2010) [-]
yes you will LOL

I ******* lol'd
#283 - CaptainObviousMan (09/09/2010) [+] (3 replies)
At last, I have finished reading this fine story! Please, someone tell me what year this is.
#51 - xxxsonic fanxxx (09/09/2010) [+] (2 replies)
I kept a straight face until "Did she eat them?". I think I pissed myself laughing.
User avatar #528 - grundo (09/10/2010) [+] (1 reply)
"Two KFC Family Buckets away from upsetting the planet's rotational axis"
Best. Insult. EVAR.
User avatar #241 - aztechy (09/09/2010) [+] (3 replies)
charleston, west virginia, now a country
#60 - Ninjaxon (09/09/2010) [-]
I CANT HANDLE ALL THIS WIN!!! David, you are my hero
I CANT HANDLE ALL THIS WIN!!! David, you are my hero
#116 - swisscheeseluver (09/09/2010) [-]
oh, the winnage!
+13
#328 - theworldofasians **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (10 replies)
User avatar #36 - SmellyPinkVeJayJay (09/09/2010) [-]
Best parts:
"2 KFC buckets away from upsetting the planet's rotational axis."
"Did she eat them?"
"Especially around tight corners during a police chase or moonshine run."
"No I ******* wont fag"
And the 2 subjects Re: dneck and Re: tard
User avatar #14 - SeoYummy (09/09/2010) [-]
"i live in charleston west virginia, the best country in the world."
... Well that explains it.
#585 - sparkieemae (09/10/2010) [+] (5 replies)
Problem, George?
#605 to #594 - xxxsonic fanxxx (09/10/2010) [-]
My God you're lonely.
#577 - Derpachu (09/10/2010) [-]
Aha, I lost it at "of a woman two KFC family buckets away from upsetting the planet's rotational axis."   
  
So much win. :D
Aha, I lost it at "of a woman two KFC family buckets away from upsetting the planet's rotational axis."

So much win. :D
#260 - Fiction ONLINE (09/09/2010) [-]
This man... is my 						*******					 hero.
This man... is my ******* hero.
#221 - stumphyjr (09/09/2010) [-]
This is the first result for "Redneck wearing baseball cap" on Google images.
User avatar #214 - BingTheDinosaur (09/09/2010) [-]
i just about lost it when he asked "did she eat them?"
User avatar #231 - zandveerx **User deleted account** (09/09/2010) [-]
West Virginia. This is where I live. Please do not judge us off of this guy. We mostly just don't give a **** what you do.
User avatar #179 - SynysterDillon (09/09/2010) [+] (1 reply)
"Don't bother emailing me again because I won't read it."

"Yes you will."

"No I won't."

at THAT i lmao'd
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