Joke of the Day (19 July). Thanks for the thumbs on the first. I'll be posting more than just one joke from tomorrow onwards.<br /> July 20: joke of the day hello your Mom anything whatever this that
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Joke of the Day (19 July)

Joke of the Day (19 July). Thanks for the thumbs on the first. I'll be posting more than just one joke from tomorrow onwards.<br /> July 20:

Thanks for the thumbs on the first. I'll be posting more than just one joke from tomorrow onwards.<br />
July 20:<br />
July 18:<br />
EDIT: WOOOO number 1!! Thanks!

Two women are chatting in an office.
Woman 1: ''I had sex last night, did you?"
Woman 2: Wes."
Woman 1: "Was it good?"
Woman 2: "No, it was a disaster... my husband came home, ate his dinner in three minutes, got on top of me, finished having sex in
five minutes, rolled over and fell asleep in two minutes. How was yours?"
Woman 1: "Oh it was amazing! My husband came home and took me out to a romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour.
When we came home he lit the candles around the house and we had an hour of foreplay. We then had an hour long session of
fantastic sex and afterwards talked for an hour. It was like a fairytale!"
At the same time, their husbands are talking at work.
Husband 1: "You wanted sex last night, how was it?"
Husband 2: "Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate, had sex with my wife and fell asleep. It was great! What about
Husband 1: ''It was horrible. I came home, there' s no dinner because they cut the electricity because I hadn' t paid the bill; so I had
to take my wife out to dinner which was so that I didn' t have money left for a cab. We had to walk home which took an
hour - and when we got home I remembered there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house! I was so angry that
I Couldn' t get it up for an hour and then I Couldn' t climax for another hour. After I finally did, I was so aggravated that I Couldn' t fall
asleep and my wife was jabbering away for another hour!"
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Views: 51072
Favorited: 6
Submitted: 07/19/2010
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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#7 - Ken M (07/19/2010) [+] (5 replies)
**anonymous rolls 889,708,019** non dubs and everyone thumbs me down
#8 to #7 - poopdicks **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [-]
damn your logic anon
#23 - NorwegianForestCat **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [+] (6 replies)
Why are these women in an office? :/
#3 - FFVIIPWNS ONLINE (07/19/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Yup. 'Cause the first thing I ask my coworkers is "Did you?"
#125 - Ken M (07/20/2010) [+] (3 replies)
Good job stealing jokes from sickipedia and then not giving them anything for it. You're and a class douche bag
User avatar #126 to #125 - woahboah (07/20/2010) [-]
um, but where did sickapedia get it from???
c'mon, its a joke, do you hear anyone in real life give credit when they tell a joke? very rarely
User avatar #112 - Dethlepricon (07/20/2010) [-]
at first i thought they had the same husband and he got exhausted being with the first wife
User avatar #57 - Jackk (07/19/2010) [+] (10 replies)
Dubbs and i eat a handful of my own **** .
*Roll 2*
User avatar #65 to #57 - stillanonymous (07/19/2010) [-]
**stillanonymous rolls 99** oh you're gonna ******* deliver.
#50 - Ken M (07/19/2010) [+] (2 replies)
I would rather suck cocks to be honest.
User avatar #52 to #50 - TheReich (07/19/2010) [-]
I know anon. Now come here big boy.
#22 - thereallAshKetchum **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [+] (1 reply)
last time i checked bitches dont need electriticy to fix up a sandwich
#49 - IcyKitsune **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [-]
Am i the only guy that would like being the second version? I think i am.


/punch screen. Cool i am bleeding! Okay i am over it.
#124 - MayerBee **User deleted account** (07/20/2010) [-]
thats an awful lot of talking and complaining for a MAN!
#33 - achillies **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [+] (5 replies)
its my birthday
#56 - Rushil **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [-]
Oh men, we so simple.
#40 - Beavernator **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [+] (5 replies)
LOL nice one. I got one:

One night Gary comes home at 2 AM so drunk that he could barely keep his balance. He heads upstairs to find his wife sound asleep, so he decides to crash right beside her. Before he knew it Gary was standing in front of the Pearly White gates, along with St. Peter himself. He told Gary that he died of alcohol poisoning, and given how Gary's first life was pretty short he would be given a second chance. Gary could either reincarnate as a hen or a dog. Gary, curious about what it would be like to give birth, chose the hen. Before he knew it Gary was whisked away to some rural farm, surrounded by a few of the other hens. A rooster approached him telling him that he was expecting children from what was once Gary...
#42 to #40 - Beavernator **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [-]
Something slid out from underneath Gary the hen, he turned around to realize it was an egg! moments later Gary made a second egg, and a third. Gary began to like the idea of giving birth until his wife woke him up yelling "Good lord; GARY YOU'RE ******** IN THE BED!"
#179 - jailbreakFTW **User deleted account** (07/20/2010) [+] (5 replies)
Hey Guys Me Again Anyways Just Posting Some New Content So Check out My proile Im Recently New To Funnyjunk So Yeah Im Not Thumb Whoring Or Anything Just Like To Post Funny Content And Some Original This Is My Latest Upload!
#181 to #179 - UnoSkullman **User deleted account** (07/20/2010) [-]
Who the **** are you...?
User avatar #173 - conorisepic (07/20/2010) [-]
so true, Sickipedia ftw, nothing spells a great night of laughter on Sickipedia, then a national disaster lol
#109 - NiggerMania **User deleted account** (07/20/2010) [+] (1 reply)
****** please...
#110 to #109 - iamjoe **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#100 - Ken M (07/20/2010) [+] (1 reply)
100th comment
**** yea
#101 to #100 - seanysmiley **User deleted account** (07/20/2010) [-]
101th comment.
Not as much but also **** Yea.
#37 - UncleJim **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [-]
Its funny cuz its true.
User avatar #10 - WolfPrince (07/19/2010) [-]
he goofed
User avatar #6 - SURFRENZY (07/19/2010) [-]
reminded me of wkuk
can you draw it
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