Sir Berington. . I (19/ 25/ 1 I (Sun) 5 Neil 6426614 96 KB, 634x456, sir bearington, jpg) I a bear character in DELI] 3. 5 M laughs bear a regge. put every poin
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Sir Berington

I (19/ 25/ 1 I (Sun) 5 Neil 6426614
96 KB, 634x456, sir bearington, jpg)
I a bear character in DELI] 3. 5
M laughs
bear a regge. put every point I can into disguise
class as a spine get mere disguise
M says I can' t speak english
out bluff
growling and gesturing. I can fake speaking a language I dent speak English]
ruse momento hire a butler NPC
him magical item to let him speak bear
An excellent suggestion, Mister Bearington. We really should ask the group to investigate the Black Marsh
n:: ourse ofthe game. be knighted as Sir Bearington
holds a dinner in my honor.
as guest becomes the first man to ever make a perception check that can beat my disguise
out loud
HEY, THAT GUY' S NOT A GUY, HE' S JUST A BEAR!"
Milan is escorted out ofthe castle while the guards apologise indignity
We' re so sorry, Sir Bearington, very sorry fer this man' s behavior"
RAAR" *shrug*
...
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Views: 32180
Favorited: 137
Submitted: 07/12/2013
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Comments(97):

[ 97 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#30 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [-]
Commencing dump!
#33 to #32 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [-]
Part One
#35 to #34 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [-]
(1 of 2)
User avatar #97 to #40 - repostforlife (02/09/2014) [-]
commontroll do you ANY more of these stories? I can't seem to find them on 4chan
User avatar #98 to #97 - commontroll (02/09/2014) [-]
Unfortunately, that's all I've gotten from random D&D comments on here.
User avatar #99 to #98 - repostforlife (02/09/2014) [-]
well crap
User avatar #41 to #40 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [-]
Ah, that's the last of them.
User avatar #56 to #39 - gevaudan ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
That story sounds a lot like Retarded Animal Babies 5.
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#74 to #32 - lellone (07/13/2013) [-]
*******		 brilliant
******* brilliant
#87 to #32 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
why did I imagine WoW'esque pandas for that
#51 to #31 - spiderbrody (07/13/2013) [-]
man that was ******* great
+73
#3 - ThatGuyHyro **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#7 to #3 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
Do you have more 4chan DnD stories?
#16 to #7 - organiclead ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
Care for more?
#17 to #16 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
That was fantastic, more if you got em!
#18 to #17 - organiclead ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
And more you shall have.
#24 to #22 - organiclead ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
And I'll stop before these lines take up too much space.
#85 to #24 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
Thanks a lot. I'm another anon, by the way.
#53 to #24 - maxsexington (07/13/2013) [-]
Moarrrr
#73 to #72 - organiclead ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#76 to #73 - organiclead ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
Hum, last one looks like it didn't upload.
#88 to #76 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
Reupload, then.
User avatar #83 to #73 - honkan (07/13/2013) [-]
This din't upload correctly becouse its a .gif. Try changing it to a .png or .jpg and it should work. MS Pain should do the trick.
#52 to #24 - creepycreeper (07/13/2013) [-]
No. You must go on.
User avatar #26 to #24 - Nihatclodra (07/13/2013) [-]
I'm loving all of these!
#69 to #20 - jsprmp ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
**** yeah! is that some Only War? or Dark Heresy?
#71 to #69 - organiclead ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
I think it's Only War.
User avatar #65 - kingchase (07/13/2013) [-]
You don't speak English in DnD, you speak common.
User avatar #67 to #65 - slayerdicthulhu (07/13/2013) [-]
Props to you^^
User avatar #4 - ningyoaijin (07/13/2013) [-]
I wish I was patient enough to learn D&D. Seems like it could be an extremely creative game.
User avatar #29 to #4 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [-]
I'm starting up with my friend. It's actually not too bad.
User avatar #42 to #4 - pappathethird (07/13/2013) [-]
you learn it as you go along
User avatar #45 to #4 - FLCLol (07/13/2013) [-]
its not hard really
you just have to get used to the dice and the times you have to roll which die like an attack whether its critical or if you can hear or see something
other than that its relatively easy
oh and not to mention the "bonuses" you receive from certain things like dexterity and how it can increase your attack or defense etc
User avatar #55 to #4 - whiplasher (07/13/2013) [-]
DND can be summed up as Intereactive Storytelling.
#63 to #4 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
yeah, I really regret that I don't have people around interested in fantasy and such. I SO wish I just had friends that I could play with everyday (or just friends for that matter >_>)
User avatar #79 to #4 - dyllygaf (07/13/2013) [-]
D&D isn't that hard to learn, it's quite simple really

Try looking at Anima: Beyond Fantasy, it's a tabletop RPG exactly like D&D but a lot more complicated and customizable
#89 to #4 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
4th ed has it's high and low points but overall it's awesome. If you want a more simplified version play 3.5 or pathfinder
User avatar #91 to #89 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [-]
3.5 less complicated than 4? Wut. I've been told it's ridiculously simplified.
User avatar #6 to #4 - chituat (07/13/2013) [-]
Honestly I didn't want to play because I thought it was too complicated; it's not as hard as the rumors say.
#1 - thewisedane (07/12/2013) [-]
Very entertaining, but how did that character get enough Intelligence to do all that stuff?
Very entertaining, but how did that character get enough Intelligence to do all that stuff?
#47 to #1 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
If they were trying to follow the book and all that, probably am Elven gift
#2 to #1 - John Cena (07/12/2013) [-]
I too would like to know that
User avatar #25 to #1 - organiclead ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
He doesn't need intelligence, he needs charisma. And it really depends on how his DM handled the translation for bear as his race. he could have had him roll stats as a normal character and added on the bearish traits as his race's modification, or he could go the way my DM handles animal characters and uses the stats in the book to define the modification on your scores. So using my own DM's method, a bear would have a +4 STR, +1 DEX, +2 CON, -5 INT, +1 WIS and -2 CHA as well as a +3 level modifier.

Assuming he rolled an 18 and put that in CHA, that puts him at a 16 CHA to begin with. Assuming he's at least level 9 (most prestige classes require at least level 5), he’s got at least two points to spend on getting his CHA to 18 again.

If he has his disguise maxed out, has the skill focus feat and has a disguise kit at the very least, he's got a good +18 to his rolls minimum. This is on core rules only, not counting the fancy stuff.

Assuming most people serving him are level 1 commoners, with a +6 spot check at max, it's very doable.
User avatar #59 to #25 - thewisedane (07/13/2013) [-]
And that is why I use Marvel Universe or GURPS.
#5 to #1 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
an awakened bear would have a high intelligence score, or a bear who found a tome and/or item that boosted intelligence would both be smart enough to pull it off
#62 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
>Dnd 3.5, long-ass campaign.
>Generic half-elf ranger gets a bear companion through weeks of hard work
>Bear is super-lucky, always gets critical rolls for attacks.
>DM realizes only way to keep mission going with a challenge is to kill the bear
>Summons Gold Dragon w/ 20th level Drow to kll the bear
>bear max crits, kills both in 3-4 turns.
>DM stops running the campaign
#61 - zerkerex (07/13/2013) [-]
Who remembers this?
#68 to #61 - John Cena (07/13/2013) [-]
Chichken boo, wha's the matter with you?
You wear a disguise to look like other guys
But you're not a man, you're a chicken boo
#64 - cyanidesandvich (07/13/2013) [-]
Time to post my DnD story right here.
i actually have 2, the rouge and the badass minotaur

i'll start with the minotaur

>playing in a campaign cooked up by our DM
>there are 5 of us playing, 4 of us (including myself) are newcomers
>have one guy who has more experience who was moving late so he's just sitting in a few sessions to start us off.
>non human/elves are hated in the known world
>playing a minotaur professor warden who studied in a far off land
>joined by some random characters, and moving guy was playing Nilbog, the goblin slave
>we had him tied up to lead us to a goblin bandit operation.
>me as the hulking minotaur tasked with leading the pack
>reach the entrance to the secret cave
>ambushed by wolves
>Nilbog get's loose
>he tries to run
>shout "oh no you dont ye' lil' goblin bastard" in a broad and gruff irish accent
>charge at him with my horns out stretched
>DM and group is in disbelief as i roll 20
>Nilbog is impaled on my horn along with a sizable chunk of rock, and we finish off the wolves

TBC
User avatar #66 to #64 - cyanidesandvich (07/13/2013) [-]
>we find the entrance to the cave and i have to duck as we enter as nilbog is flailing and shouting obscenities
>we get through some booby trapped corridors to a large well furnished room
>goblin with a golden sword and a human bandit esque person are atop a staircase behind a desk
>"what do you think you're doing here"
>bluff and say "what's it look like, bringing you back a spy"
Probably best i mention that we had a bounty to kill the leader of the gang.
>they dont belive me
>tell them i want to join the gang
>they say that i need to kill my party members first
>refuse and we jump into battle
>play it safe for pretty much the whole battle, my team is getting killed
>i begin setting fire to the curtains and book cases
>fire spreads and a support beam falls crushing one of the party members.
>it's just down to me (hardly scratched) and one of the players who played a giantess.
>she's got pretty much no health left.
>decide there's no point in dying needlessly
>charge at her, i don't even need my hammer, i impale her on my free horn next to the dead Nilbog
>she dies instantly
>tell the goblin and human gang leaders that i want to join their gang but fighting all 3 other party members would be the death of me.
>bluff rolled 19, given a cushy job in the goblin gang.
>our DM had a completely different story planned but instead he had to change it completely from a tale of corruption of the throne to some thing about being members of a criminal gang.
>i was lawful neutral the whole time
User avatar #77 to #66 - DoktorHax (07/13/2013) [-]
as a DM here, **** YOU. thats a horrible thing to do. still funny as **** though.
User avatar #78 to #77 - cyanidesandvich (07/13/2013) [-]
everyone else had died, i was stuck with either die and we start over, or live and give it all a big twist.
User avatar #54 - blamie ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
I once hilarity'd this paladin with Cha as as dump stat to have a bluff check so high I told a barkeep I was a cat and he believed me.
#43 - pappathethird (07/13/2013) [-]
gets me every time
gets me every time
#95 - joshytclegg (07/14/2013) [-]
Okay, so this happened today at a DnD session. Me and my friends have only just started, can;t even remember what edition we play, but oh well, all relatively new to this. Anyway.

> Walking down the road in fancy new dwarven cloaks after a successful quest in the mountains. Feeling pretty smug.
> On the way to our destination village, accosted by hooded men.
> Advise us to drop our weapons, noting me as I had already reached for my Hand crossbow.
> Our Eladrin Rogue wants to find a way to get out of this.
> Warlock and Paladin ambushed, knives to throats
> Final warning for me to drop my weapon. **** that.jpeg.
> Assassin lunges at me, I move to block, roundhouse kicked off the road. **** .
> Paladin shield bashes out of lock by Assassin. Smacks him up a bit and then convinces him to run before he gets holy on his ass.
> Warlock takes the knife to the chest and then scores a 20, blasting the Assassin back with a fireball, catches the assassin on fire. 1 down.
> Eladrin Rogue Fae steps into tree, critical failure on dex test, steps in birds nest revealing his location.
> Two assassins close in on me, one on our Dwarven cleric.
> Get to my feet, one Assassin dives into the bush.
> Lead assassin lunges with knife, Nope.gif, draw sword and dive forward, roll Athletics check to gut check the Assassin, 19 + 7, **** yeah, stumble him back. Second assassin dives from bush, roll athletics to see if I can follow through my movement and smash him across the face with my sword hilt. roll 19 again. Hells to the yeah.
>Lead Assassin stumbles towards Dwarf cleric, he does a dex check to see if he can take out the Assassins legs with his warhammer. +0 modifier. Rolls 20. Reduces the Assassins legs to splinters. The other assassins flee a turn later.
> Our faces when our Eladrin did nothing more than Fae step and throw shuriken.
User avatar #58 - SuperSixONE (07/13/2013) [-]
www.funnyjunk.com/user/SuperSixONE/102#102
My story, it had too many line breaks so here it is on my profile.
User avatar #70 - softcover (07/13/2013) [-]
I was in a 3.5 campaign a while back, it was my 2nd or 3rd campaign so I was still kinda new, so I decided half elf ranger, and got me a pet panda bear eventually.

We're traveling via air boat to a city across the mountains,
me and cluddles (the bear) are chilling out in the kitchen,
The rest of my party is doing random stuff across the ship,
We had a LG pally, a CE dragonborn necromancer, a TN druid , CN me, and a TN warforged fighter.
Warforged puts everything into health, he can survive most things that would one shot the rest of us, Pally and Necromancer hate each other, necromancer often does stuff to piss off the pally. I put everything into intimidate, once rolled a check to scare a kobald into telling me where his leader was, gave him a heart attack. woops.
The pirates eventually start raiding the place, and one happens into the kitchen,
hes trying to steal a huge tub of food,
he spots me,
"Stay right there or I'll shoot!" I make an intimidation check, roll 20.
walk strait up to him, staring him in the eyes the whole time while petting my bear,
grab an apple from the tub, and take a bite out of it, look back up, "Boo" Pirate drops tube, bear starts feasting, pirate jumps out of kitchen window, falling all the way down off the air boat. TBC
User avatar #75 to #70 - softcover (07/13/2013) [-]
With my new prize I stroll down the rest of the ship, noticing the pirates have pretty much taken over,
I decide to meet up with the rest of the group and they're all fighting pirates,
decide its over run, go find guards to help us escape,
guard in charge of evac is found and we start talking to him, pally first because hes charismatic out the wazoo and only the women and children were supposed to go at first,
Necromancer decides he had enough of it, acid splashes the guard in the face. Guards are all chasing after us, pirates as well, necromancer laughing, Cuddles and I decide we'll commandeer a couple parachutes, we jump off the ship,
we deploy parachutes on our way down,
we hear screaming in the form of a pally and druid, who as well jumped with us, necromancer and warforged no where to be found,
still falling,
necromancer and warforged zoom past us on their way down,
They forgot the parachutes, thought we all just jumped.
we land, crater of warforged bits and a flat necromancer are starting to pick themselves up,
Bear is just shaking his head like "oh god these people..."

User avatar #8 - zaxzwim ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
what does it mean D&D 3.5
User avatar #9 to #8 - galtro (07/13/2013) [-]
3.5 is the edition of the ruleset. DnD is currently on 4th edition with the 5th soon to come out
User avatar #10 to #9 - zaxzwim ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
ahh so he is talking about the board game
User avatar #11 to #10 - galtro (07/13/2013) [-]
Correct term is tabletop game, board games are a different category
#13 to #11 - redwolv (07/13/2013) [-]
How would a person go about getting into D&D there some kinda way to find people to play with, like meetings?
User avatar #14 to #13 - Monsterofthedog (07/13/2013) [-]
Lots of ways, grab a group of friends buy the books from one of those nerdy stores and just have fun. Me and some friends meet at a mcdonalds once a week and do it. Lots of fun
User avatar #50 to #13 - dogwars (07/13/2013) [-]
roll20.net/
Try this website, also, think about getting into pathfinder. It's a game that gets regular expansions (new books) and is like a better version of 3.5.
User avatar #12 to #11 - zaxzwim ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
ok then
#86 - sgtmajorkururu (07/13/2013) [-]
Fooled me.
#84 - maxsexington (07/13/2013) [-]
Unforgotten Realms Ep.1 - The Makings of Heros!
User avatar #82 - BrownBearninetysix (07/13/2013) [-]
Okay , so. I really want to gather my friends for a role playing session, but the problem is that none of us have any experience, nor do we know anyone that does. So, what would be a good way to go about starting a session?
+1
#90 to #82 - freespeech has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #94 to #90 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [-]
Maybe put up a couple fliers or something, and possibly a few girls. Who knows?
User avatar #93 to #82 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [-]
Go to a comic shop, they'll usually have somebody who plays there, and you can ask for advice. But if you just wanna be in character and beat the campaign, then I suggest just having fun, and making sure to do things that match character. I just played as a Dwarven ranger with 6 INT and 2 CHA. I'm less charasmatic than the average bear. I played along with this the entire time. Eventually I'm beset by these things that eat you whole and hunt for the blood of the intelligent.

So what I do is I roll to convince them I'm smart so they don't eat me. I roll a 5, with my -4 to CHA, I rolled a 1. It worked and they went for my friend playing as an elf and I ran away.

So just always keep your mind open, get as many details on your surroundings as possible. Also, jump, climb, tumble, and balance are good to have so you can get out of reach of things and all.

But it's important to just have fun. Now, if you want to just break a campaign... well, take that up with the people in the comic store.
User avatar #96 to #82 - softcover (07/14/2013) [-]
You can always also head over to barnes and nobles and get a set, you'll need a master's guide, player handbook, and monster manual would be optimal, a set of dice, 4-20, and a grid mat to play on, it doesn't need to be grid, but if you want to do multiple landscapes with one mat that'd be the one, just use dry erase marker.

Oh, and make sure to follow the rule that the barkeep is always 26 levels higher than the highest other person in the room. Hilarity always ensues with that one.
User avatar #81 - darkhaitsu **User deleted account** (07/13/2013) [-]
I remember my doppelganger cursed by a blood golem. It didn't need any weapons as it only cut his veins to let the blood flow to other monsters and explode their head. Unfortunabely, i was in a group of vampires -_- i soon died.
#80 - maphrox (07/13/2013) [-]
My DnD group pretty much always expects every NPC to actually be Sir Bearington.

It's quite easy to troll them.
#23 - bazda (07/13/2013) [-]
This story reminds me of "Chicken Boo" from Animaniacs.
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