Sir Berington. . I (19/ 25/ 1 I (Sun) 5 Neil 6426614 96 KB, 634x456, sir bearington, jpg) I a bear character in DELI] 3. 5 M laughs bear a regge. put every poin
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Sir Berington

I (19/ 25/ 1 I (Sun) 5 Neil 6426614
96 KB, 634x456, sir bearington, jpg)
I a bear character in DELI] 3. 5
M laughs
bear a regge. put every point I can into disguise
class as a spine get mere disguise
M says I can' t speak english
out bluff
growling and gesturing. I can fake speaking a language I dent speak English]
ruse momento hire a butler NPC
him magical item to let him speak bear
An excellent suggestion, Mister Bearington. We really should ask the group to investigate the Black Marsh
n:: ourse ofthe game. be knighted as Sir Bearington
holds a dinner in my honor.
as guest becomes the first man to ever make a perception check that can beat my disguise
out loud
HEY, THAT GUY' S NOT A GUY, HE' S JUST A BEAR!"
Milan is ******** out ofthe castle while the guards apologise indignity
We' re so sorry, Sir Bearington, very sorry fer this man' s behavior"
RAAR" *shrug*
...
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Views: 31711
Favorited: 140
Submitted: 07/12/2013
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+73
#3 - ThatGuyHyro **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (20 replies)
#30 - commontroll (07/13/2013) [+] (19 replies)
Commencing dump!
User avatar #65 - kingchase (07/13/2013) [+] (1 reply)
You don't speak English in DnD, you speak common.
User avatar #4 - ningyoaijin (07/13/2013) [+] (9 replies)
I wish I was patient enough to learn D&D. Seems like it could be an extremely creative game.
#1 - thewisedane (07/12/2013) [+] (5 replies)
Very entertaining, but how did that character get enough Intelligence to do all that stuff?
Very entertaining, but how did that character get enough Intelligence to do all that stuff?
#62 - anonymous (07/13/2013) [-]
>Dnd 3.5, long-ass campaign.
>Generic half-elf ranger gets a bear companion through weeks of hard work
>Bear is super-lucky, always gets critical rolls for attacks.
>DM realizes only way to keep mission going with a challenge is to kill the bear
>Summons Gold Dragon w/ 20th level Drow to kll the bear
>bear max crits, kills both in 3-4 turns.
>DM stops running the campaign
#64 - cyanidesandvich (07/13/2013) [+] (3 replies)
Time to post my DnD story right here.
i actually have 2, the rouge and the badass minotaur

i'll start with the minotaur

>playing in a campaign cooked up by our DM
>there are 5 of us playing, 4 of us (including myself) are newcomers
>have one guy who has more experience who was moving late so he's just sitting in a few sessions to start us off.
>non human/elves are hated in the known world
>playing a minotaur professor warden who studied in a far off land
>joined by some random characters, and moving guy was playing Nilbog, the goblin slave
>we had him tied up to lead us to a goblin bandit operation.
>me as the hulking minotaur tasked with leading the pack
>reach the entrance to the secret cave
>ambushed by wolves
>Nilbog get's loose
>he tries to run
>shout "oh no you dont ye' lil' goblin bastard" in a broad and gruff irish accent
>charge at him with my horns out stretched
>DM and group is in disbelief as i roll 20
>Nilbog is impaled on my horn along with a sizable chunk of rock, and we finish off the wolves

TBC
User avatar #8 - zaxzwim (07/13/2013) [+] (7 replies)
what does it mean D&D 3.5
User avatar #9 to #8 - galtro (07/13/2013) [-]
3.5 is the edition of the ruleset. DnD is currently on 4th edition with the 5th soon to come out
#61 - zerkerex (07/13/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Who remembers this?
#15 - SovietXMudkip (07/13/2013) [+] (5 replies)
Me and two of my buddies are doing our first DnD game, with me as the DM. I really hope they pull shenanigans like this, it will be glorious.

So guys, any tips for a first time DM? I have the kingdom and the main story in my head, but that's about it.
User avatar #27 to #15 - Nihatclodra (07/13/2013) [-]
1) If someone wants to make a roll for something crazy and/or unprecedented, let them do the roll. If it is a special type of roll that has no actual rules for it yet, create said rules yourself appropriately.
2) Be prepared to change the direction of your campaign at a whim, more often than not: something will happen to make things derail from the path.
3) If the players decide to do something else that is time-consuming before their actual objective, do not have the main objective wait for them. Have the world move without them: if you have to save someone, they WILL be killed if you take too long.
User avatar #54 - blamie ONLINE (07/13/2013) [-]
I once hilarity'd this paladin with Cha as as dump stat to have a bluff check so high I told a barkeep I was a cat and he believed me.
#43 - pappathethird (07/13/2013) [-]
gets me every time
gets me every time
#95 - joshytclegg (07/14/2013) [-]
Okay, so this happened today at a DnD session. Me and my friends have only just started, can;t even remember what edition we play, but oh well, all relatively new to this. Anyway.

> Walking down the road in fancy new dwarven cloaks after a successful quest in the mountains. Feeling pretty smug.
> On the way to our destination village, accosted by hooded men.
> Advise us to drop our weapons, noting me as I had already reached for my Hand crossbow.
> Our Eladrin Rogue wants to find a way to get out of this.
> Warlock and Paladin ambushed, knives to throats
> Final warning for me to drop my weapon. **** that.jpeg.
> Assassin lunges at me, I move to block, roundhouse kicked off the road. **** .
> Paladin shield bashes out of lock by Assassin. Smacks him up a bit and then convinces him to run before he gets holy on his ass.
> Warlock takes the knife to the chest and then scores a 20, blasting the Assassin back with a fireball, catches the assassin on fire. 1 down.
> Eladrin Rogue Fae steps into tree, critical failure on dex test, steps in birds nest revealing his location.
> Two assassins close in on me, one on our Dwarven cleric.
> Get to my feet, one Assassin dives into the bush.
> Lead assassin lunges with knife, Nope.gif, draw sword and dive forward, roll Athletics check to gut check the Assassin, 19 + 7, **** yeah, stumble him back. Second assassin dives from bush, roll athletics to see if I can follow through my movement and smash him across the face with my sword hilt. roll 19 again. Hells to the yeah.
>Lead Assassin stumbles towards Dwarf cleric, he does a dex check to see if he can take out the Assassins legs with his warhammer. +0 modifier. Rolls 20. Reduces the Assassins legs to splinters. The other assassins flee a turn later.
> Our faces when our Eladrin did nothing more than Fae step and throw shuriken.
User avatar #82 - BrownBearninetysix ONLINE (07/13/2013) [+] (4 replies)
Okay , so. I really want to gather my friends for a role playing session, but the problem is that none of us have any experience, nor do we know anyone that does. So, what would be a good way to go about starting a session?
User avatar #96 to #82 - softcover (07/14/2013) [-]
You can always also head over to barnes and nobles and get a set, you'll need a master's guide, player handbook, and monster manual would be optimal, a set of dice, 4-20, and a grid mat to play on, it doesn't need to be grid, but if you want to do multiple landscapes with one mat that'd be the one, just use dry erase marker.

Oh, and make sure to follow the rule that the barkeep is always 26 levels higher than the highest other person in the room. Hilarity always ensues with that one.
User avatar #58 - SuperSixONE (07/13/2013) [-]
www.funnyjunk.com/user/SuperSixONE/102#102
My story, it had too many line breaks so here it is on my profile.
#86 - sgtmajorkururu (07/13/2013) [-]
Fooled me.
#80 - maphrox (07/13/2013) [-]
My DnD group pretty much always expects every NPC to actually be Sir Bearington.

It's quite easy to troll them.
User avatar #70 - softcover (07/13/2013) [+] (1 reply)
I was in a 3.5 campaign a while back, it was my 2nd or 3rd campaign so I was still kinda new, so I decided half elf ranger, and got me a pet panda bear eventually.

We're traveling via air boat to a city across the mountains,
me and cluddles (the bear) are chilling out in the kitchen,
The rest of my party is doing random stuff across the ship,
We had a LG pally, a CE dragonborn necromancer, a TN druid , CN me, and a TN warforged fighter.
Warforged puts everything into health, he can survive most things that would one shot the rest of us, Pally and Necromancer hate each other, necromancer often does stuff to piss off the pally. I put everything into intimidate, once rolled a check to scare a kobald into telling me where his leader was, gave him a heart attack. woops.
The pirates eventually start raiding the place, and one happens into the kitchen,
hes trying to steal a huge tub of food,
he spots me,
"Stay right there or I'll shoot!" I make an intimidation check, roll 20.
walk strait up to him, staring him in the eyes the whole time while petting my bear,
grab an apple from the tub, and take a bite out of it, look back up, "Boo" Pirate drops tube, bear starts feasting, pirate jumps out of kitchen window, falling all the way down off the air boat. TBC
#49 - deletedmyaccount (07/13/2013) [-]
This makes me unreasonably happy.
#23 - bazda (07/13/2013) [-]
This story reminds me of "Chicken Boo" from Animaniacs.
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