Nice guys finish last. Ba Dum Tst Porn stars without makeup, gross: . nice guys ejaculate after their female counterparts


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#71 - barteleiff (07/10/2013) [-]
I like these comics
#2 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
I feel like its rude to not give your partner an orgasm, like its half the battle lol. Its a lot more fun if the other person is like twitching at the end.
User avatar #81 to #2 - wardylocks (07/10/2013) [-]
twitching? ... do you kill them at the end or have sex with zombies?
User avatar #141 to #2 - gayboard (07/10/2013) [-]
I agree, but I feel like it's more awkward to finish and then spend like another 10 minutes trying to finish off your partner.
User avatar #144 to #141 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
Oh hell yeah it sucks, but hey they want to get off too.
#97 to #2 - McCockAFucker (07/10/2013) [-]
i love giving girls epileptic seizures too!
#101 to #97 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
I never would have thought 			*************
I never would have thought *************
#36 to #2 - xxmarkusxx (07/10/2013) [-]
mfw, it takes me over an hour to cum, and i usually don't get off when i have sex because the women is so out of it from multiple orgasms that she doesn't want to continue.

I should have masterbated less as a child...
#66 to #36 - anon (07/10/2013) [-]
On one hand, I wish I could last that long because sometimes I don't even get my partner off, but on the other I would like to get off as well so I feel sorry for you bro. Why couldn't evolution give us the ability to cum on command?
#70 to #66 - riposter (07/10/2013) [-]
<Mfw "On one hand"
User avatar #110 to #66 - technobanana (07/10/2013) [-]
I got a friend who can come on demand... unless he is drunk its ******* creepy man
#68 to #66 - xxmarkusxx (07/10/2013) [-]
well there is tantric sex, which is basically cumming on command, but it takes a lot of devotion, and time. Supposedly after learning tantric, you can cum just by being touched, multiple times if you want, or not at all if that is your desire.
well there is tantric sex, which is basically cumming on command, but it takes a lot of devotion, and time. Supposedly after learning tantric, you can cum just by being touched, multiple times if you want, or not at all if that is your desire.
User avatar #148 to #36 - wellfuckmylife (07/10/2013) [-]
Take a masturbation break for 3 weeks (impossible, I know). Woman's vagina doesn't have that grip your hand has. Your penis is "used to that grip" and anything lose doesn't work.

So yeah, take a masturbation vacation. If you still feel the urge to do it, then do it loosely. You should be fine.
User avatar #162 to #148 - xxmarkusxx (07/10/2013) [-]
i probably jack off like, twice a week maybe, and i get laid about that many times in a weeks as well, i just have a high stamina. I have tried the masturbation break thing, I once did not masturbate for almost two months, and it still took me about an hour/little over. I have even gone as far as to try sensitizing lubes, anal stimulation (shut it anon), just about everything. I have even talked to a doctor, who basically summarized it as an under developed ductus deferens, which means i can't have kids either since the sperm is dead when it comes out, because of slow sperm flow. on the plus side, my orgasms can last for minutes sometimes.
User avatar #169 to #162 - wellfuckmylife (07/10/2013) [-]
Damn.. That's sad : /
But women must love you for your stamina (long long lasting [until death] relationships can be problem) and orgasms which last some times minutes.. I can't even imagine it.
But still, it's sad.
User avatar #170 to #169 - xxmarkusxx (07/10/2013) [-]
they do indeed.

and the orgasm thing is a bit much sometimes, it can cause some major cramping, and sometimes headaches.
#87 to #36 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
Thats the problem i have right now with my &quot;friend&quot; she literally has never gotten me off by her own will, like head and everything just wont do it and after a while she always gets sore to a point where i dont want to continue because i know its painful to her. The only way i've ever finished is me being on top.    
Thats the problem i have right now with my "friend" she literally has never gotten me off by her own will, like head and everything just wont do it and after a while she always gets sore to a point where i dont want to continue because i know its painful to her. The only way i've ever finished is me being on top.

User avatar #90 to #87 - xxmarkusxx (07/10/2013) [-]
try more cunnilingus, i have found that the more revved up you get them, the more butter there is for the turkey before you stick it in the oven. Not to mention being able to cook said turkey for longer because of said cunnilingus.

That's really convoluted, GET HER WETTER BEFORE YOU **** HER SO SHE DOESN'T DRY OUT SO FAST. There, that should make more sense.
User avatar #91 to #90 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
Its not her thats has the orgasm problem, its me lol.

Im saying we go for so long to try to get me off that eventually she gets sore, but yeah thats why they make lube and i already "butter the turkey" :/
User avatar #94 to #91 - xxmarkusxx (07/10/2013) [-]
then i suggest having her do kegles (idk the spelling) it allows her to have more control of the muscles in her vaginal passage, thus allowing her to apply more pressure on your dingus, which gets you off faster. great thing about kegles, you can do them anywhere, so if she does them constantly for about a week, she'll be able to crush a grape with her pooter, and you get that amazing "virgin" feel.
User avatar #104 to #91 - technobanana (07/10/2013) [-]
Its really not that hard to give a girl an orgasm.. you just gotta ask her what she likes and if she likes something keep doing it, the key to getting a girl off is using your mouth and two fingers inside going back and forh on her g spot that will keep her nice and wet + if she knows enough about her body she might even cum from that and squirt on ya face, but I wouldn't bet on it.. spent too much time trying to get mine to squirt but she is too scared and doesn't know how to do it, but yeah use ya ******* mouth dude altenate speeds and directions suck on her clit a bit and you are done, don't bother with internal orgasms until you mastared outside ones! good luck!
#126 to #104 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
Why is everyone giving me advice here, I CANT CUM, she gets off just fine multiple times.
I said that she goes so long trying to make ME cum that she gets sore and i tell her to stop because i can tell its bothering her which in turn makes her feel worse because she cant get me off.
User avatar #128 to #126 - technobanana (07/10/2013) [-]
Oh okay read it wrong, well I am in the same boat she cannot for the life of her toss me off or suck me off, she has like once or twice but it was painful and required me to like tense so much i ached for ages, I am fine fapping so its her being **** at it, and it takes me a while to cum when I **** her you just gotta keep going :3 or fap until you are close then stick it in her?
User avatar #139 to #128 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
Yeah i mean i feel the same way, i can get myself off in like 2 minutes but she just cant. I feel like she wouldnt like me sitting on the side of the bed fapping while she watched hahaha.
User avatar #140 to #139 - technobanana (07/10/2013) [-]
Its happened more then once believe me... or when I am really ******* horny cus she has been teasing me all day then turns around and says she is too tired or what ever so I just fap one out (Y) its depressing
User avatar #142 to #140 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
I guess im lucky thats shes always horny lol, literally almost every time i see her we do the horizontal mombo
User avatar #143 to #142 - technobanana (07/10/2013) [-]
Well we usually **** at least 3 times a weekend but sometimes she gets bad head aches and all that **** it pisses me off more that she won't even try to finish me or apologise for teasing me all day... ******* bitch
User avatar #146 to #143 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
Wow thats funny, she tells me that having an orgasm will fix head aches which i think is true but i havent had the chance to rid my self of a head ache with sex yet. Its one of the reasons ive had sex with her before lol.
User avatar #147 to #146 - technobanana (07/10/2013) [-]
It does reduce head aches but she is a ******* bitch and just thinks its me trying to get her into bed, well it is but thats beyond the point, I like sex and she aches like I am a dog or what ever.. I like ******* her and she gets annoyed that I want it so much... she shouldn't be so ******* hot! oh i could rant for hours about her trust me...
User avatar #149 to #147 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
Aww thats too bad, sounds like a **** situation. Although the girl im with, a **** buddy i guess is cute but not like super hot or anything i guess thats part of my problem. I need to get with a girl that im really attracted to but i usually just act like a retard around pretty girls.
User avatar #151 to #149 - technobanana (07/10/2013) [-]
Well she isn't UBER HOT but she is very suductive and I live curvy girls with big boobs, she always has bedroom eyes and her bottom lip just makes me go mad, if she so much as looks at me a certian way I am horny all day... its annoying!
User avatar #152 to #151 - oxYKellark (07/10/2013) [-]
HAHA sounds good, i guess my friend isnt really my type but who isnt when were doing the deed. Meh.
User avatar #153 to #152 - technobanana (07/10/2013) [-]
Sometimes I wish I had a **** budy on the side, we got weeks sometimes without seeing each other so I just want to **** her loads when i see her, thats all... ******* women
#42 to #36 - kingbulbasaur (07/10/2013) [-]
You are not alone.
You are not alone.
User avatar #43 to #42 - xxmarkusxx (07/10/2013) [-]
thank god, i was starting to think i was gay or something...

no, i don't get boners from men...
#8 to #2 - anon (07/10/2013) [-]
I just do it, if I cum before her then ah well, I go down on her til she cums. Everyone is a winner.
User avatar #16 to #8 - themongoose (07/10/2013) [-]
it's not everyday you hear a guy admit he's willing to lap up his load to give his girl her jollies too.
User avatar #34 to #8 - desecratedstudios (07/10/2013) [-]
My girlfriend only cums a certain way... We normally always get it, however there are times i feel bad because i do and she doesn't.. I wish going down on her worked..
User avatar #18 to #8 - namnori (07/10/2013) [-]
I just keep going until I cum again...
#4 to #2 - brokentrucker ONLINE (07/10/2013) [-]
Holy 			****		 this.
Holy **** this.
#15 to #2 - maucorn **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #27 to #15 - squeemonster (07/10/2013) [-]
True! Neither I or my partner are the type to finish every time we have sex and we don't force it, and we started to get along perfectly once this was an established fact. I'll go for a good solid hour of fooling around than twenty minutes of bang and done any day!
User avatar #24 to #15 - wersand ONLINE (07/10/2013) [-]
Most of the partners I've had have been at least a little irritated the few times that they did not get off. This my perspective as a straight male.
User avatar #185 to #24 - ironsoul (07/10/2013) [-]
I am male and I have nerve damage which makes it hard to finish when I am with another human being. I like the emotional aspect of being with my partner more than the physical aspect, though both are nice.
#26 to #24 - maucorn **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#9 to #2 - anonymoose (07/10/2013) [-]
Dead girls can't cum.
User avatar #12 to #9 - ekiouja (07/10/2013) [-]
let me stop you there. It all depends how long they have been dead.
User avatar #13 to #12 - anonymoose (07/10/2013) [-]
Why would I want a newly dead one? They're still a bit warm.
User avatar #14 to #9 - lolokoko **User deleted account** (07/10/2013) [-]
It's not necrophilia if they were alive to start with.
#86 to #14 - crinagel **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #184 to #9 - ironsoul (07/10/2013) [-]
Not with that attitude.
#40 to #37 - Metallicock has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #73 to #37 - YllekNayr (07/10/2013) [-]
What does this have to do with anything?
#124 to #37 - philss (07/10/2013) [-]
wacken jlouis
das ist benger.
ohne persönliche sache jetzt, aber das auf dem foto ist benger mit 25.
#123 to #37 - anon (07/10/2013) [-]
Even his chin got fed up with him and left.
User avatar #92 to #37 - oniiking (07/10/2013) [-]
and biologically missing a chin
#85 - granadablashlack (07/10/2013) [-]
I think all of you are mixing up "nice guy" and "hideous virgin who's nice because they have to be". Know the difference!
User avatar #132 to #85 - Shiny (07/10/2013) [-]
The phrase "nice guys finish last" does, in fact, refer to genuinely nice people.
User avatar #96 to #85 - tomowrath (07/10/2013) [-]
pretty much what i was gonna say
#173 to #85 - thatotherguyk **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #112 to #85 - sabcy (07/10/2013) [-]
I actually follow a gentleman's code of conduct and go out of my way to be courteous to others
#136 to #112 - anon (07/10/2013) [-]
You sound like one of my cunt friends.He is pretty beta.Time to get thumbed down by offended betas
User avatar #150 to #136 - granadablashlack (07/10/2013) [-]
To be Alpha you need at least some muscles and size, but it mainly comes from standing up for yourself and making yourself heard and not letting people push you around. Alpha is in fact just being a real ******* man!
User avatar #164 to #150 - konradkurze (07/10/2013) [-]
yeah but then one needs to know the difference between being an alpha and being a dick
User avatar #168 to #164 - xzynth (07/10/2013) [-]
Dick =/= Alpha, but you can be Alpha and a Dick.
User avatar #171 to #168 - konradkurze (07/10/2013) [-]
yeah and how many relationships turn to **** with Alpha being a dick.....or the Alpha Dicks moving on to other girls and the first girl ends up with Beta Bro because he sticks around
User avatar #172 to #171 - xzynth (07/10/2013) [-]
User avatar #138 to #136 - sabcy (07/10/2013) [-]
actually, I'm pretty alpha. I'm just not interested in getting a girl at the moment.
#69 - funnyfuuuuuu (07/10/2013) [-]
He looks like Sterling Archer...
He looks like Sterling Archer...
#135 to #69 - thepink (07/10/2013) [-]
I heard archer thread...
I heard archer thread...
#23 - malakii (07/10/2013) [-]
Not when you're this classy fedora wearing stud!
#182 to #23 - strangesir (07/10/2013) [-]
MFW I can't tell if it's actually a fedora or just a trilby.
#137 - anon (07/10/2013) [-]
Says all of the virgins and guys claiming to be friendzoned...
#61 - nortledrones (07/10/2013) [-]
This image has expired
Yeah, it was because you were too much of a "nice-guy".
User avatar #174 to #61 - merpdederp (07/10/2013) [-]
Once that guy's acne clears up, he no longer needs his braces, and he gets some contacts and a little bulk, he could look pretty good.
#7 - infinitereaper (07/10/2013) [-]
The nicest thing anyone has ever said to me was: &quot;Maybe that just means you last longer in bed.&quot;   
In response to saying &quot;nice guys finish last&quot;
The nicest thing anyone has ever said to me was: "Maybe that just means you last longer in bed."

In response to saying "nice guys finish last"
User avatar #76 to #7 - payseht (07/10/2013) [-]
nicest thing anyone said to me was "It's not that small..."
User avatar #17 - kikisu (07/10/2013) [-]
Nice guys really don't finish last most of the time, and if they do it's because they're going after the wrong type of girl.
User avatar #41 - davvi (07/10/2013) [-]
Nice guys finish last.
You're running out of gas.
Your sympathy will get you left behind.
User avatar #49 to #41 - tomoyomomo (07/10/2013) [-]
When you are the outcast
Don't pat yourself on the back
You might break your spine
User avatar #44 to #41 - AbsentMinded (07/10/2013) [-]
I love you!
User avatar #22 - holeymoley (07/10/2013) [-]
NICE GUYS thankyou for reminding me of a great song
User avatar #99 to #22 - suiker (07/10/2013) [-]
I hated that James Blunt guy in the chorus
User avatar #100 to #99 - holeymoley (07/10/2013) [-]
hate is a strong word, but i respect your opinion.
#106 to #100 - suiker (07/10/2013) [-]
Deleting your comment doesn't work anymore mwuhahahahaha
User avatar #108 to #106 - holeymoley (07/10/2013) [-]
User avatar #102 to #100 - suiker (07/10/2013) [-]
however Ryan is an awesome singer.

I know bby sorry <3
User avatar #105 to #102 - holeymoley (07/10/2013) [-]
Nice Guys Acoustic chester is cool too
User avatar #107 to #105 - suiker (07/10/2013) [-]
which one is chester?
User avatar #109 to #107 - holeymoley (07/10/2013) [-]
the guy you hate
User avatar #113 to #109 - suiker (07/10/2013) [-]
then I hate him lol
User avatar #114 to #113 - holeymoley (07/10/2013) [-]

even if he wrote a song especially from me to you
User avatar #115 to #114 - suiker (07/10/2013) [-]
lawl, I know that song. Still hate him though
User avatar #117 to #116 - suiker (07/10/2013) [-]
I brove you holey bby <3
User avatar #118 to #117 - holeymoley (07/10/2013) [-]
I love you in the most heterosexual way.
User avatar #119 to #118 - suiker (07/10/2013) [-]
nohomo <3
#103 to #102 - holeymoley has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #165 - carnageboy (07/10/2013) [-]
#48 - anon (07/10/2013) [-]
If you don't satisfy your woman, someone else will.
#3 - anon (07/10/2013) [-]
There is no way that is not a picture of Sterling Archer.
#63 - ColonelHansLanda (07/10/2013) [-]
Orgasms are like opinions. I don't care if she has one.
User avatar #179 - tehweave (07/10/2013) [-]
What's that? OP is a virgin?
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