Hell yeah, 'dis ma nigga Satan. let's fuark. ili" if you gs to hell for being bad why wouldnt satan reward you for it why does he make you suffer wtf id be like
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Hell yeah, 'dis ma nigga Satan

let's fuark

ili"
if you gs to hell for being
bad why wouldnt satan
reward you for it why
does he make you suffer
wtf id be like hell yeah
************ you my
***** lets party
i started he laugh and then i
realized that this is actually
a really valid question
Alternatively, if Satan
punishes sinners, why isn' t he
considered good?
If the Pope dies, is he being
promoted er fired?
were becoming self aware
...
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Views: 88710
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Submitted: 05/29/2013
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Comments(515):

[ 515 comments ]

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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#1 - awesumjjman ONLINE (05/29/2013) [+] (21 replies)
*sigh*

Time for another flood...
#15 - Cleavland Steamer (05/29/2013) [+] (27 replies)
If there's a heaven and hell, what age do you appear as when you go there?

Imagine you're like 95 with tons of old people diseases and you go to heaven. Are you still 95 years old in heaven? That would suck some major chode to be a frail, old, wrinkly **** for the rest of eternity.

What if a baby dies? If it goes to heaven, what happens to it? Does it grow like normal or does it just float around, giggling and completely unaware of what the **** is going on until the end of time?

Some people have told me dead babies go to hell because they have original sin. If that's the case, is there just like a massive landfill of smoldering infants in hell, with patrolling demons casually prodding them with pitchforks every few seconds?

These types of questions are why nobody wanted to sit next to me in elementary school.
#61 - crazyolitis (05/29/2013) [+] (1 reply)
#20 - sidathon (05/29/2013) [+] (1 reply)
made my day
#4 - anonymous (05/29/2013) [+] (41 replies)
Well, This is not really all that valid. It assumes a warped view of the God/Satan relationship. It's not like Satan lives in and has all powerful control over Hell. Satan isn't sitting in Hell and torturing people. What he is trying to do is corrupt God's creation and become like God. It won't happen and he is destined to be sentenced to Hell. It's not a big party for him or anyone else that goes there.
Satan doesn't punish sinners. Hell is a place where unrepentent sinners are separated from God and all that is good. Imagine being in a place where all happiness and fulfillment and comaraderie is removed and all you have left is misery, sadness, and regret. That's Hell and you don't need some red-horned, pitchfork-carrying demon to do anything at all to you. He will be in the same situation that everyone else will be: cowering alone in the dark with the only thing he has left to him, his pain.

TL;DR - These fools don't know what they're talking about.
User avatar #36 to #4 - pepemex (05/29/2013) [-]
"Imagine being in a place where all happiness and fulfillment and comaraderie is removed and all you have left is misery, sadness, and regret."
Sounds a lot like highs chool
User avatar #58 - bothemastaofall (05/29/2013) [-]
According to legend, hell is god's invention. Satan doesn't control it, he suffers too.
+30
#149 - kaoknight **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (8 replies)
#204 - tomthehippie (05/30/2013) [+] (2 replies)
One issue; Satan does not torture people in hell, simply being in hell is torture, and is punishment for all sinners, including Satan.

Satan knows he has already lost, that he is already going to go to hell when Jesus comes back, so his goal is simply to take as many people down with him as he can.

Basically, Satan isn't some demigod, naw, he's the angelic (or demonic if you prefer) version of a rebellious teenager who knows he already lost the fight with his dad (God), and does anything and everything he can to spite God to get back at him.
User avatar #271 - Cambro (05/30/2013) [+] (7 replies)
I see some have already responded things like this, but I thought this biblical studies and theology fag could jump in, too.
All of this is true under the assumption that the caricature of Christianity is true, not real Christianity. Firstly, hell is not a place of fire and brimstone where everyone is tortured. Hell is the condition of being entirely separated from God (that is, all that is good). Those in hell aren't continually being tortured, they simply exist outside of goodness. It is unclear if those in hell even have a body. They may just be a disembodied soul.
Secondly, Satan does not punish sinners but rather deters people away from God so they may go down with him. Divine retribution (good things happen to good people, bad things happen to bad people) is not a biblical principle. In fact, it is seen more biblically that the righteous suffer and are tortured by Satan and his demons so they may turn away from Christ. Read Job. He has everything taken from him to prove he is good because he loves God, not because he loves what God gives him.
Actually, if you're a sinner you're likely to never see Satan. Let me just pose this to skeptics: if Satan and demons want to deter people away from God, revealing themselves is a terrible idea because it shows there are supernatural occurrences. Ever wonder why skeptics never see demons or ghosts but more superstitious people do? While this may be chalked up to gullibility, do not neglect the hypothesis that skeptics are purposely kept in the dark because this the easiest way for Satan to win in this society.
I would need an entire new comment about the Pope remark. I am prepared to make a statement about it, but I won't clutter Funnyjunk with my unfunny musings. If you want me to say it, reply to this comment and I'll post.
User avatar #191 - RoyalNightmare (05/30/2013) [+] (3 replies)
I'm just throwing this out there, not taking either side.

No where in the bible, does it say that Satan rules over hell. The most accepted translation is that he suffers in hell, with the people who are sent there.
#474 - ohbamse ONLINE (05/30/2013) [+] (1 reply)
I once met this christian on the street, who stopped me. He obviously stopped me because i was wearing Mjölnir around my neck, and i have 2 norse mythology tattoos. He asked me "why are you in a religion of sinners" and then i told him "it's not the mythology that killed the christians back in time, it was the vikings, theres a big difference" and we had this conversation going for quite a long time. A question came to my mind, which i couldn't bear to not ask him. I asked him "did god create everything?" and of course, he answered "yes". I then asked him "did god also create diseases, such as cancer?" then he answered "no, that was satan". Thus i asked him "to what purpose?" and he answered "to punish all the sinners". And i was like "okay, okay, i can follow that. But why does cancer then hit all the people that don't deserve it too? Alot of old people, who do nothing but take care of there grandchildren, mind there own business, and just try to live life, get hit by cancer, and actually dies from it. can you answer why good people also gets hit by cancer?" I actually thought he would come up with an answer for that. But No. Instead he looked blindly at me for 2 seconds, and CHANGED the conversation. Then he began talking about god's deeds and satans punishment and he kept on going. I had to ask him ONE more question before i left. I asked him "why do you stop people like me, on the street, to talk and try to convert them to your religion? Why am i not able to trust in what i want to, without people comming to my and start talking about how good your religion is?" here comes the good part. After a few seconds, he straight out, and with a cold voice answered "because you're wrong!" I just started laughing and walked away.    
TL;DR : Allways let christian people on the street come to you and ask you questions. Allways let them make up an discussion. Because good god, if you know a little about religion, just a little bit, it is easy for you to win the discussion.
I once met this christian on the street, who stopped me. He obviously stopped me because i was wearing Mjölnir around my neck, and i have 2 norse mythology tattoos. He asked me "why are you in a religion of sinners" and then i told him "it's not the mythology that killed the christians back in time, it was the vikings, theres a big difference" and we had this conversation going for quite a long time. A question came to my mind, which i couldn't bear to not ask him. I asked him "did god create everything?" and of course, he answered "yes". I then asked him "did god also create diseases, such as cancer?" then he answered "no, that was satan". Thus i asked him "to what purpose?" and he answered "to punish all the sinners". And i was like "okay, okay, i can follow that. But why does cancer then hit all the people that don't deserve it too? Alot of old people, who do nothing but take care of there grandchildren, mind there own business, and just try to live life, get hit by cancer, and actually dies from it. can you answer why good people also gets hit by cancer?" I actually thought he would come up with an answer for that. But No. Instead he looked blindly at me for 2 seconds, and CHANGED the conversation. Then he began talking about god's deeds and satans punishment and he kept on going. I had to ask him ONE more question before i left. I asked him "why do you stop people like me, on the street, to talk and try to convert them to your religion? Why am i not able to trust in what i want to, without people comming to my and start talking about how good your religion is?" here comes the good part. After a few seconds, he straight out, and with a cold voice answered "because you're wrong!" I just started laughing and walked away.
TL;DR : Allways let christian people on the street come to you and ask you questions. Allways let them make up an discussion. Because good god, if you know a little about religion, just a little bit, it is easy for you to win the discussion.
#175 - thebritishguy (05/30/2013) [+] (9 replies)
Satan and his angels were just locked up in hell getting tortured, it's God who sends you to hell if it's all real
#505 - ronnorc (05/30/2013) [+] (3 replies)
FACT: The only thing the Bible says about Hell is that it is a realm where people are SEPERATED FROM GOD, which is supposed to be the ultimate punishment in and of itself. This fire and brimstone 						****					 all comes from Inferno, a chapter in an epic poem by Dante. Even in that interpretation Hell is one big prison, and Satan is just another inmate in it, not the warden.   
   
Droppin' some knowledge on all y'all 						******					.
FACT: The only thing the Bible says about Hell is that it is a realm where people are SEPERATED FROM GOD, which is supposed to be the ultimate punishment in and of itself. This fire and brimstone **** all comes from Inferno, a chapter in an epic poem by Dante. Even in that interpretation Hell is one big prison, and Satan is just another inmate in it, not the warden.

Droppin' some knowledge on all y'all ****** .
#206 - DrWeird (05/30/2013) [+] (1 reply)
I think Satan is a pretty cool guy. Eh punishes sinners and doesn't afraid of anything.
I think Satan is a pretty cool guy. Eh punishes sinners and doesn't afraid of anything.
#56 - combatplatypus (05/29/2013) [+] (8 replies)
Satan doesn't rule Hell, he's being punished too. He just wants people to suffer with him because, you know, he's Satan.
User avatar #297 - herberto (05/30/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Satan doesn't like humans.
Not very hard concept to understand.
#282 - wobblewub (05/30/2013) [-]
mfw religion
#482 - gecocowie (05/30/2013) [+] (2 replies)
Welcome to funnyjunk, now what tumblr content would you like to see
#487 to #482 - vedgetable (05/30/2013) [-]
welcome to funnyjunk, where we nag about reposts, new content, other peoples comments, and comments we are currently making ourselfs
#468 - anonymous (05/30/2013) [+] (2 replies)
if abortion is bad and all those aborted children go to heaven, why don't we abort everyone so we can all be in heaven?
#470 to #468 - thechosentroll (05/30/2013) [-]
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BY THE NINE! Anon has a point.
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