definitely keep him. . chickensandwich: What if your giving a bi in the shower and he just starts shampooing and conditioning youwhat very polite keep him. On a unrelated notice, there are more nipples in the world than there are people. Please move onwards to the next comment. definitely keep him chickensandwich: What if your giving a bi in the shower and he just starts shampooing conditioning youwhat very polite On unrelated notice there are more nipples world than people Please move onwards to next comment
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[ 201 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
#5 - felixjarl
Reply +347 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
On a unrelated notice, there are more nipples in the world than there are people.

Please move onwards to the next comment.
#203 to #5 - larryqa **User deleted account**
-4 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #225 to #203 - ctenop
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
Even if it only included female nipples it would be true...
#205 to #5 - nymikemet
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
My God!   
They are Taking Over!
My God!
They are Taking Over!
#141 to #5 - boomboomsha
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
what the **** man
User avatar #150 to #5 - lostbutseeking
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
I havent seen anything more random and in the same time true sentence in my life so far. I thank you.
User avatar #158 to #5 - whenuleastxpect
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
you made my day.
User avatar #216 to #5 - gorginhanson
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
I have nipples Greg, can you milk me?
#239 to #5 - Jesusnipples
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
My username made me feel like I had some sort of responsibility to reply to this comment
User avatar #30 to #5 - chaossniper
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
what if i told you there are twice more nipples than humans (+/- 0.05% third nipples)

source : i know i counted them
User avatar #36 to #30 - freddyb
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
i know someone who doesn't have any nipples
User avatar #37 to #36 - chaossniper
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
i met the guy he is in my calculations
User avatar #41 to #37 - freddyb
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
don't you call my sister "he"
User avatar #103 to #41 - chaossniper
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
sorry was hard to tell the difference without nipples
User avatar #93 to #41 - RamzaBeoulve
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
You've seen your sister's lack of nipples? Kinky.
#70 to #36 - Yesitsme
+1 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #232 to #30 - tastycrisps
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
what if they were twisted off?
User avatar #59 to #30 - originalanonymous
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
What about third nipples.
User avatar #138 to #59 - hektoroftroy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Like Marky-Mark
User avatar #102 to #59 - chaossniper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
already counted mate
#14 to #5 - dissectedtesticle
Reply +62 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
that's kind of... obvious...
User avatar #22 to #14 - bitchplzzz
Reply +51 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
However, there are less penisses than humans
User avatar #24 to #22 - dissectedtesticle
Reply +44 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Actually, since every male mammal has a penis, that statement is false.
User avatar #143 to #24 - manicekman
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Not only mammals have penises. So penises outnumber people a lot.
#144 to #143 - dissectedtesticle
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
I didn't want to go into detail.
User avatar #42 to #24 - pedobearRAW
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
sharks have two penisses
User avatar #95 to #42 - fistpump
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
I mean every two men are one shark.
****, I don't know.
User avatar #94 to #42 - fistpump
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Therefore, every man is two sharks.
#133 to #42 - anon id: 7b10035d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Sure... but sharks aren't mammals.
User avatar #25 to #24 - lurifax
Reply -6 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
... no. Humans. Females don't have penises.
User avatar #26 to #25 - dissectedtesticle
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
He didn't mention that the penis owners should be only humans.
#27 to #26 - lurifax
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Oh, I see.
User avatar #31 to #22 - carnivoreapples
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
i guess this means we should share
#23 to #22 - pearfield
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Just as obvious, really
#1 - pooflinger
Reply +191 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Imagining this gives me a feel.





I am sad that I will probably never experience this. It would be lovely for both myself and whoever was giving me the blowjob.
#2 to #1 - anon id: 929b4b42
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
well if you want....





we could get you a dog and some peanut butter.
#47 to #2 - marcalo
Reply +42 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
#48 to #47 - marcalo
Reply +38 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
#166 to #48 - anon id: 32ef0719
0 123456789123345869
Comment deleted by rasconza [-]
User avatar #182 to #166 - rasconza [OP]
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
not on my content
#40 to #2 - thefasrdog
Reply +26 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
My dog hates the shower...
#79 to #2 - pooflinger
Reply +24 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Its just not the same.   
   
   
   
   
Believe me.
Its just not the same.




Believe me.
#139 to #2 - cough
Reply +10 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#72 to #2 - funnyjunkelite
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
#83 to #2 - entarasul
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
get a job pay hookers god dammit
#230 to #2 - ompalomper
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#202 to #2 - larryqa **User deleted account**
+1 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#176 to #2 - anon id: 8ed11286
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
wouldnt the dog just bite your dick off, i've never understood how a dog just wouldn't take a chuck otta it since it tastes good to him
User avatar #229 to #176 - qwarthos
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
dogs don't chew peanut butter, they lick it
User avatar #220 to #176 - iamnotstevenhooper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
Dogs are a bit smarter than that. Most of them anyway.
#137 to #1 - anon id: 989510e9
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Stop being a beta wuss
Go out, meet women and get your ******* blowjob already dammit
#193 to #1 - anon id: 78bc6a5e
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
You'll have it happen, I have heard so many of my friends swear they will never be with someone in high school. Now you look at those people years later and they all have girlfriends or wives.
User avatar #142 to #1 - Kairyuka
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Well do you want a blowjob or a relationship with someone you love? Because one of those are very easy, and the other takes lots of self-reflection
User avatar #28 to #1 - nebuchadnezzaurus
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
At least you got a roof over your head, food, and an internet connection
that's what I tell myself, anyway
User avatar #115 to #1 - drastronomy
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
likewise.....

ugly loners unite
User avatar #29 to #1 - hrg
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Wouldn't it be you and the the person you were giving the blowjob too
User avatar #35 to #1 - ompalomper
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
you know?

month or two at the gym, hitting a few bars, pretending to be confident to the point that you become confident and then get a gf and you won't have to imagine
User avatar #65 to #1 - deathstare
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Problem I see with that is:
1. The shampoo will run into her eyes and mouth, if not properly cared for (or if water runs)
2. Said shampoo, once in her mouth, will enter the urethra of your penis.
3. You now have two people in pain. Worst case scenario, your penis gets bitten off.
User avatar #21 to #1 - ivoryshadow
Reply +27 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Sorry to hear that pooflinger...
#39 - ggdhindo
Reply +81 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
i would do that but i dont have a girlfriend
#66 to #39 - anon id: 69d007e6
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Then take up Plato and Hobbes and Milton and have patience.
User avatar #69 to #39 - usernamecannotload
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
see comment #58
#96 to #39 - penetractor
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
i would do that, but my gf doesnt shower much and doesnt like to suck dick
#101 to #96 - jonnyfunk
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
This image has expired
**jonnyfunk rolled a random image posted in comment #40 at I'm going on an adven - oh shit ** oh she does! just not yours
#231 to #96 - anon id: 929b4b42
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
"my girlfriend doesn't shower much"

dude. gross.
#87 - truekiller
+46 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#106 to #87 - linkheros
Reply +21 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
canoodling
canoodling
User avatar #3 - rzkruspe
Reply +43 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
That's actually the kind of thing I would do
#118 - mode
Reply +34 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
#73 - raidenkanya
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
My ex and I did this once, the only problem is some shampoo got in my eye around the same time he came.
My ex and I did this once, the only problem is some shampoo got in my eye around the same time he came.
#155 to #73 - disies
Reply -7 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
"My ex"...You have seen some dicks in front of you, dirty     
   
   
:You and your ex in that moment
"My ex"...You have seen some dicks in front of you, dirty


:You and your ex in that moment
#80 to #73 - anon id: f1018f8e
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Yes... shampoo...
#112 to #80 - raidenkanya
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Yes.   
   
Shampoo.
Yes.

Shampoo.
#173 to #112 - awakendhybrid
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
your gifs
#180 to #173 - sanguinesolitude
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
This image has expired
#135 - scumbagposter
Reply +26 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Shampoo+Dick
Shampoo+Dick
#46 - leeisawesome
Reply +22 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
I definitely want to try this out on someone, just to see their reaction, for the lols

just need to find someone to love me now...

<--- HFW
#105 to #46 - bitchpleaseshutup
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#82 to #46 - entarasul
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#86 to #82 - leeisawesome
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
I got excited for a moment then because I thought I'd pulled, then I realised you assumed I was offering to GIVE the blowjob...

Sorry pal

>YFW
#89 to #86 - entarasul
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
who said i am a guy?
#90 to #89 - leeisawesome
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
You posted in the 'show a picture of yourself' thread
#92 to #90 - entarasul
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
you dirty little ****** every girl on internet is a pedo didnt u know
#97 to #92 - leeisawesome
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Maybe the sort of girls you're talking to online
Maybe the sort of girls you're talking to online
#98 to #97 - entarasul
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
you would never know what i am doing to this kind of jokers
#58 - anon id: cfcb353f
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Guise. Seriously.

Stop being whiny cunts. You're all young, still.

You will eventually meet someone, stop worrying about it already. Do you want a girlfriend? Step one; BE CONFIDENT. I know it might be hard, but it's most definitely the best way. Girls like secure guys.

Shower, put on some nice clothes and go outside on a Saturday night. Don't sit home on funnyjunk feeling sorry for yourselves. As said, be confident, but don't try too hard. YOU are who YOU are, and there is someone out there specifically for YOU. Keep looking, don't give up. You all have it in you. One day, you will meet the person who is meant for you. I promise.
#60 to #58 - nigalthornberry
-13 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#91 to #60 - penetractor
Reply +17 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
being cute wont get your dick sucked
being cute wont get your dick sucked
#125 to #91 - infernis
+5 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#64 to #58 - anon id: 242705d2
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
but what do if girl ?
#68 to #64 - anon id: 69d007e6
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Do the same **** smarty
#74 to #58 - anon id: b6c7bf34
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Or you'll die alone.
#77 to #58 - anon id: 163315be
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Or you will live long enough to see yourself become the dbag
#191 to #77 - anon id: e1ae086c
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
No... that's not twue... THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!
#100 to #58 - anon id: 7fa9d8c1
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
What if I can't go anywhere on a Saturday night because my parents refuse to let me get my goddamn license?
User avatar #122 to #100 - ICEDgrunge
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Do what you were innately born to do and walk.
#151 to #122 - anon id: 7fa9d8c1
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
What if girls refuse to date you because you don't have a Mustang or BMW to take them around in like all the other guys you know?

*sobs quietly*
#172 to #151 - bannon
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Then ditch that bitch!
User avatar #190 to #151 - ICEDgrunge
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
You're going for the wrong ******* women then. Stop trying to pin your inability to get a date on anyone but yourself. If you have the ambition then you will get what you want, and you clearly lack that.
#113 to #58 - anon id: fe871b2d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
actually its proven that if you look like brad pitt, you will get your dick sucked regardless if you are confident or not.
#126 to #113 - anon id: 415bb4f4
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
only if you has his fame and money to go with it, though.
#130 to #126 - anon id: 415bb4f4
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
*have, damnit.
User avatar #152 to #58 - arizonastar
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
I hope you're right. I really, really do.
#189 to #58 - anon id: e1ae086c
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
THANK YOU.

I was getting annoyed at the comments
#108 to #58 - icametocomment
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Anon has a point. Girls dig confidence. Big difference between that and douchebaggery, though.
User avatar #120 to #58 - tastycrisps
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
What advice would you give for a lonely female?
User avatar #149 to #120 - othagovna
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
- Be yourself.

- Make the first move. (Many guys actually like it when the girl makes the first move and asks them out. It removes quite a bit of uncertainty of if the girl actually likes him, boosts his confidence and is very flattering to the guy).

- Be up front and strait forward with the guy. (Men are generally very strait forward in how they communicate, whereas women rely more on body language and other subtle methods of communication that men have difficulty understanding.)
User avatar #217 to #149 - tastycrisps
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
-no problem

-made first move to a guy like 6 months ago. not only did he not like me, but he said nothing about it, he just made lame excuses no not go out until we just fell apart(destroyed my confidence BTW)

-please, i hate non-direct communication. I say what I mean and what's on my mind because I want people to trust my opinion. If I say your shirt is nice, I really ******* think the shirt is nice.
User avatar #240 to #217 - othagovna
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
If the guy is shy/introverted then he will more than likely rebuff a girl's advances for a while (until she can convince him that she's not just toying with him and actually does like him).

Many shy/quiet/introverted guys do that in order to avoid getting hurt by rejection or being toyed with by girls. Some of them do this due to a lack of confidence that may have been compounded over time. Others do this because experience has taught them that the only reason a girl would be "interested" in him is if she is trying to use (and then discard) him, or is trying to lead him on for her own amusement.

As a result of this many of these types of guys will just automatically assume that any girl making advances on him is either trying to use him or is trying to toy with him. Proving that those are not your intention can take a while and require a fair bit of understanding.
#148 to #120 - anon id: 7fa9d8c1
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
TELL THE GUY YOU LIKE HIM.

No, seriously. We're ******* stupid and insecure, so if you don't flat out tell us we'll never know.
User avatar #218 to #148 - tastycrisps
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/27/2013) [-]
Did that, I did not end well.

Asked him out, he didn't take it as seriously as it actually was, he thought I meant to go out as friends. Well somewhere along the line he caught on, but didn't say anything. I tried plan after plan to get a first date, but he kept shooting me down with lame excuses. He even turned down going to Universal Studios. Well two months later I realize he's not really into it so I confront him about it("Did you only say yes to going out to be nice"). Well he confesses he only likes me as a friend and didn't get the full meaning when I asked him out. We kindof fought, and I haven't talked to him since.

As a side note: Two of his favorite sayings are "Nice guys finish last" and "There's nothing as awful and frustrating as the friendzone.
User avatar #136 to #120 - thebestperson
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
As a fellow female, be yourself and don't follow the crowd.
User avatar #145 to #120 - nonnotitiapono
Reply -3 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
you dont have to do much but wait, atleast thats how i see it.
User avatar #129 to #58 - edlias
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
I hate people whining about not having a girlfriend also but I also hate how people say to just be confident. People don't just flick a switch and are all the sudden confident, it takes a lot of time for people to build it up within themselves if they lack it. You cant just think "women like confidence, I am now going to be confident". Not to mention there is something that is making them insecure in the first place which they need to address and it isn't always easy as hitting the gym.
#81 to #58 - davajz
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(05/26/2013) [-]
Damn Tyrone you got it together
Damn Tyrone you got it together