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Because for MOST people that end up doing what that guy does do so because it is their fallback. Not their first choice. A lot of people who are socialy considered loosers like this guy escape into video games and blanket themselves with fake realities in order to deal with their shortcomings. I *************** you that given a choice of being a fit attractive male with a social life the majority of these "hobbyists" would accept gladly. There is nothing wrong with doing what you like, but using this kind of stuff to escape reality because you have to, not because you choose to, isn't doing what you like. Its doing what you are forced to like because of circumstance and your inability to change.
Or perhaps they initially had a hobby that was socially unacceptable, and were forced deeper into it by the idiots that believe themselves better? In the end though, it doesn't really matter WHY they're living their life in such a fashion. Perhaps that's what they want, to work and fill their free time with fantastical worlds? Who's to say. I know this may come as a shocker to you, but some people don't particularly enjoy physical activities, and would rather take part in activities involving technology and fictional characters. We should live in a time in which someone isn't hated upon just because of their chosen hobbies, yet we never will because of media constantly berating our pathetically puny minds into believing there is only one way in which you can be happy. Sure, it's natural for a human being, regardless of gender to exercise and be outside socializing, but it's also just as natural for someone to choose what they want in life.
You make valid points but I have to disagree with you on one major thing. Yes it is possible that they were driven into a socially unacceptable hobby by idiots, yes some people dont enjoy physical activity, yes a LOT of people enjoy fantastic worlds and crazy sci fi stuff (**** i know i love that ****), and yes the media is absolutley moronic. THat being said I can tell you one thing from personal experience. In high school i was in tech support, walking around fixing ****, I built my own gaming rigs since i was 12, etc. However I loved to work out (and still do) and played football. I had two groups of friends: the nerds and the jocks. While I didn't particularly enjoy one over the other I noticed that the jocks whether they be stupid, assholes, or just decent dudes were happy of what thy were. My nerd friends however always bitched and felt bad that they didnt have a girlfriend, and they didnt look good, etc. From this I drew the conclusion that humans are still basically pack animals, most of us want to be alpha males, but only a few can. Some continue to fight and succeed while others give up and make excuses like "this IS what I actually want to do" and "I am happy" even though they are not. I'm trying to point out that while there may be some people who actually choose to live like this and are happy, the majority (being human) want to change their lives but do not have the will to do so and cope with it like the dude in the picture.
I sorta see the point you're making, and it might be true for some people... but I don't think it's quite accurate... Surely many people in this world do delude themselves in one way or another... but what you said, it just sort of implies, whether intentionally or not, that the
of "geeks/nerds" are
into those sorts of nerdy things
they were/are unpopular, that they've tricked themselves into liking them, and not because they're
interested in them.
And, well... I sorta find that insulting, in a way.
Yeah, I'm socially awkward. Yeah, I'm a geek... But I can tell you this. The "geeky" interests came first, by far. As a young child, I was never much interested in sports. I never idolized athletes or whatever. But I've been into video games since I was old enough to hold a con
er, and watched anime before I even know that "anime" was a thing.
This was all before middle-school, when a lot of my social anxieties started to develop in earnest. And, yes, I suppose there are things about myself I'd like to change, but so doesn't nearly every person on this planet. And you are right that few people have the willpower to actually change themselves. But I can tell you that I'd never give up my nerdy hobbies and interests. I never "chose" to become a nerd because I couldn't get laid. I was already a nerd before I even started caring about girls. And I'm not unhappy being a nerd. Not at all. That's something I
want to change. I'd love a girlfriend, sure, but social anxiety aside, I'm also not entirely unhappy being alone. Other people can be... frustrating... But that's just me.
I get that, I think we can pretty much agree on the same concept except to varying degrees because of different personal experiences. I can live with that. Hoooray for interwebs civility.
Anywho, what I'm not happy about is the way "geeks" and "nerds" are often perceived. "They're losers", "They've just given up on the real world", etc. The people that complain about their nerdy lot in life, that you mentioned... Well, some of them might very well be as you said, simply seeking out fantasy/sci-fi/game/whatever as an escape (those on the nurture end of the spectrum). But my main point here is that I think you greatly underestimate the amount of people that are more on the nature end of the spectrum. The number that are genuinely into stuff like that, and continue to follow their passions regardless of society telling them they're losers, or that they can't
be happy like that. 'Cuz who the hell is anyone to dictate another person's definition of happiness, you know?
And, I mean, of course some are going to complain, when they're scorned by all the "cool" kids, and told that liking certain things makes them wrong or a loser. But I think you've got it kind of backwards. Kids/teenagers, like it or not, often have a narrower view of the world. If they don't fit in with what's "cool" in their school/area, they see themselves as inadequate somehow. They aren't becoming nerds because they're unhappy, they're unhappy because they compare themselves to all the "cool" kids, and wish they could be like them, instead of doing what they enjoy.
The question of whether one is unpopular for liking "nerdy" things, or one turns to nerdy things because they're unpopular... It's hard to answer, kinda a nature vs. nurture deal. But it's not something one can make wide assumptions about. No one is quite the same.
Personally I believe the whole cool/uncool, acceptable/unacceptable comes from our primal nature. Think about it, in high school the popular kids are usually the strong good looking ones because in that settings they are the most suitable choice for a "mate", if you will. They naturally become the alpha males. The situation changes later on in life because while looks are still important income and stability becomes the most important factor in the process of finding a mate who will most likley guarantee the proper development of a woman's offspring. This is all subconscious of course. No matter were you are America or Russia or somewhere else the story is the same. Just human nature. Well just nature really. Also humans are a social species, and as such we tend to form packs and clicks, usually lead by the alpha of the group. Just like gazelles and ****. I mean honestly, look at any nature show about social/pack mammal and then recall your high school environment. Same exact ****
I was that loner that no one knew existed, generally by my own choice. Intentionally kept to myself and ignored all the drama. Shame I didn't have a camera though... Coulda made a nature documentary about the different breeds of high schoolers in their natural habitats. Hah.
But in all serious, you are right about humans being social creatures. That certainly has it's advantages, having friends and allies for support. Unfortunately, that can also give rise to the "group mindset", and potentially turn people into sheeple. Or some people will sadly abandon their "uncool" friends, because they want to be one of the "cool" people.
Of course, what's "cool" is extremely subjective, across time and cultures...
In any case... even for those who
only looking for an escape, for a bit of solace... is that really so wrong? Is it? I don't fully understand those who say escapism is bad. The world is a cruel place, and the human lifespan brief. Even if it's not "real", what's so bad about spending part of the time you have in a world where you can be happier?
To quote Tolkein:
"Yes...fantasy is escapist, and that is its glory. If a soldier is imprisoned by the enemy, don't we consider it his duty to escape? The moneylenders, the know-nothings, the authoritarians have us all in prison; if we value the freedom of the mind and soul, if we're partisans of liberty, then its our plain duty to escape, and to take as many people with us as we can! "
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