Signals. . What girls think is enough Sim] of their in MB tills sillily. It's not that women expect you to magically make the first move, it's just that girls are more tactile than men (tactile meaning you speak with your body). This
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Comments(268):

[ 268 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#50 - BillyRyan (05/18/2013) [-]
I fix that problem by having no girls interested in me.
#4 - holler (05/17/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#8 to #4 - emomonster (05/18/2013) [-]
every time that plays, I think the plane is gonna get bigger.
#124 to #4 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
I am astonished how many planes she can take, she's at 67 allready and still taking more planes.
User avatar #18 to #4 - doodogger (05/18/2013) [-]
For some reason that's so ******* funny.
#111 to #4 - Schadenfreude (05/18/2013) [-]
I had a dildo that might have worked but the plane hit it.
I had a dildo that might have worked but the plane hit it.
#173 - manirock (05/18/2013) [-]
**manirock rolled a random image posted in comment #40 at Team Rocket ** mfw a girl smiles at me
#86 - chopsaw (05/18/2013) [-]
this reminds me of some female hair (or something) commercial. where it goes
"he could be the man of your dreams, father of your children, now all you have to do is get him to say hello."
or you could say hello, and initiate the conversation ... ******* bitch
User avatar #109 to #86 - cabbagemayhem (05/18/2013) [-]
thumb just for the image, wish i could thumb again for the comment
User avatar #209 to #86 - paintmered (05/18/2013) [-]
Holy **** I've seen that commercial. Isn't it a commercial for toothpaste? You live in Canada?
#234 to #209 - chopsaw (05/18/2013) [-]
yes and i think you are right
#56 - grimmwaters ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
#190 - Rellikthebrit (05/18/2013) [-]
What you actually get!
User avatar #6 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
It's not that women expect you to magically make the first move, it's just that girls are more tactile than men (tactile meaning you speak with your body). This is why women can have a whole bunch of different conversations with eachother while never speaking a word, or get a sense of how things happen or events unfold just based upon body language alone. However, the problem arises out of two things, 1. Because most women are not TRAINED to notice body language, they just do it subconsciously (which is why they have a lot of 'feelings' about things, but never anything definite), and 2. They believe men to be just as tactile, although most men are not. This is why, for a woman, "I'm fine" can mean a hundred different things, while for a man "I'm fine" just means you're fine; and as a result, because women are tactile and expect men to be as well, they read far more into our "I'm Fine"'s than they should, which is why they often get hysterical, because MEN give off the wrong body language and we honestly don't know what's wrong when we think we do, and WOMEN don't understand why they're feeling the way they're feeling but they do and they think we're causing it. And so, when that women at the coffee shop gives you that smile and flirts with you, she thinks she's giving off every hint she can and you're simply not interested, while you, not being tactile, don't get nuances and subtlety and as a result you just think she's just being friendly

In Laymans terms: Everything wrong between a man and a women is just a big, massive misunderstanding
#121 to #6 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
This is **** dude,mabye you get likes here because full of betas but im dude and i can read a bodylang.. girls can read a **** ,you have to have clear head. Woman dont know what they want and their observative skills aro mostly weak(Yea,i mean,that womens outside,like IN REAL LIFE not from the ******* pictures)
User avatar #122 to #121 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
You know, if you didn't try so hard to prove you're a 'dominant male', perhaps people would actually believe you when you said you were. Just a thought.

Furthermore, what is it with people who only read half the paragraph? I never said men could not, under any circumstances, read body language; I only stated that women have a natural affinity for it, and even then, without proper discipline they cannot understand it well.

Very few people actually know what they want out of life, that's why the majority of the human race goes through a 'mid-life-crisis'. Knowing what you want comes from self-understanding and personal growth, if you do not know yourself you cannot possibly know what you truly want or why you want it.

Actually, I would say the observation skills of a woman are superior to a man's. If you asked a mother, you'd be very surprised just how many details she keeps track of and how much she notices, v.s. the father of the family
User avatar #212 to #6 - ICEDgrunge (05/18/2013) [-]
I find the advice and hope you've just so honorably bestowed upon these young men and women a tad farce considering you're named Captain **** it All
User avatar #247 to #212 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Should my name be relevant? Would you take me any more seriously if I was called "Smertgai" or "TheSage" or "Thatguywhoknowsalotaboutthesethings"? The name, or rather, whoever tells you information should not matter, even those such as Adolph Hitler and Adi Amin have things to teach you when you pay attention
User avatar #261 to #247 - ICEDgrunge (05/18/2013) [-]
******* christ it was a joke. I know there's a stick up your ass but it isn't cool to beat people with it.
User avatar #262 to #261 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
I don't know if you noticed, but we're speaking over text through Funnyjunk, you never exactly know what you can take as a joke

Furthermore, how can you speak to me as if I'm this uptight prude, when you're the one flying off the handle when I simply commented that names are unimportant
User avatar #9 to #6 - urbanvibes (05/18/2013) [-]
no. people who say "im fine" when theyd ont mean it, just dont wanna talk about it. its what EVERYONE DOES. and girls do not have conversations wwith body language oh please..
User avatar #11 to #9 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
...Alright, we'll walk through this

You're absolutely right, people who don't mean it when they say 'I'm fine' simply don't feel like burdening another with their problems. Than again, that's not what we're talking about, is it? What I'm saying is males are far more upfront about how they feel and what they want, while women are more subtle

You should also be aware that only 30% of conversation is actually verbal, the rest has to do with things such as body language to even eye movements. You can learn a lot from someone just by watching how they move or the sound of their voice, or their mannerisms. Perhaps you should do some research on your own, rather than refuting my logical paragraph based upon how you feel about it
User avatar #10 to #6 - falloutfanatic ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
for some reason this isnt all the comforting to know....
User avatar #12 to #10 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Eh, you can take it however you wish. When you understand something, it becomes a lot easier to control. Instead of being intimidated by such truth, why not learn to be tactile yourself?
User avatar #13 to #12 - falloutfanatic ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
Its just, now i know that not only is it my lack of knowledge when it comes to women that i got going against me, but a fundamental inability to understand them. Kinda just kicks my depression over the issue into overdrive.
User avatar #15 to #13 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
And what's being depressed about it gonna do? Look, you don't have a fundamental inability to understand women, ANYONE can learn how, women just have an affinity for it (and on that note, they don't even know how to do it properly, which will make YOU look more impressive once you learn how). Just be more confident and don't over analyse situations

Truth is truth is truth, and as bad as some of it is, ignoring it and letting it get to you does nothing. The most you can do, and SHOULD do, is understand it and work with it
User avatar #22 to #15 - falloutfanatic ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
everybody always uses that word, "confident... confident.... just gotta be confident", confidence is not my issue... i do not understand what it takes to make a woman desire me as a man. I can talk to women just fine, have a nice conversation about something or talk about a show on tv, but i honestly don't know what to say or do to get women to find me attractive... i stand on the side lines and watch other guys talk to them and i just don't understand how they do it... its like trying to use a 2 in binary code, it just doesn't work

And what makes it just so much ******* worse is (and i honsetly mean no offense) every guy gives me the same ******** advice, "Be confident"
+5
#51 to #22 - palemotherfcker **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #27 to #22 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Because you're not getting it right, and very few people do. Do you respect yourself? Are you happy with yourself? Do you enjoy your own company? No? Then why should anybody else? When you act this way around women, or around anybody, are you doing it because it's really you? Or are you just doing it because you think it's what they want?

You seem like a good person, but you are far too short-sighted. You should not, cannot, focus on romance and love NOW before the rest of your life is sorted out, and if you do, it will be doomed to fail. Do you just want to get some action, get laid? Well then change your surroundings, improve yourself, go on an adventure, you will see just how quickly you change and others will notice it too, and more-so, you will be far more attractive to anyone you meet along the way of your adventure (there's something like a lifted weight when you go to a different place to have fun, because it's highly unlikely you will meet many of these people again and thus you become more daring and decisive, which is a great quality in someone wise enough to handle them properly

It's not ******** advice, you just have a ******** mind-set. Sort your life out, get your priorities in order, aim for them with everything you have. You'll see just how quickly everything, including love, organizes itself
User avatar #33 to #27 - falloutfanatic ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
Man you just don't get it. Im not looking to just get laid, and if you knew me in real life you know that im the last of people to go on an "Adventure". Those things just aren't me. I'm comfortable with myself and in the past 2 years i've made great strides in life. I become more social (i was a bit of an introvert still my junior year of high school), i got into the college i wanted, and i even got the internship i wanted this summer. My priorities are just fine and my life is getting better everyday.

I just always am reminded of that story from ancient greek mythology when i see a happy couple. Of how humans used to have 4 legs and arm and 2 head, but zues split us in two and now we wander the earth looking for our other half. Now i'm a pretty patient easy going guy, i like to take things in stride and not get over-whelmed by little annoyances. But seeing them so happy and knowing that i may never find my other half... i just want to find my god damned other half already.
User avatar #35 to #33 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
No, it seems you're the one who's just not getting it. I couldn't care less what type of person you are or what motives you have, what I care about is you following your ambitions. Everyone wants to find someone they are totally comfortable with, wanna know why so many divorces happen? Why love just dies so many times? It's because people rush into it, believing that once you fall in love it'll be a happy ending, but life doesn't work like that. If you are not happy now, you will NOT be happy in a relationship, you may seem happy, you may even convince yourself it's great, but sooner or later that high will come back down and reality will hit you hard. What you NEED is to find something to devote your energies to. Be more outgoing, join a group or a club, force yourself out of your comfort circle, you will be amazing just how many great people you meet and how many of them want to stay by your side

You say that you've gone through all this work and effort to find your other half, yet the one thing you're unwilling to do is take chances. Just plan, have a fall back, then go for it. The worst that can happen is you get a story to tell
#82 to #33 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
Alright real talk advice right now? The thing is that you're not gonna find a girl to just instantly like you (at least i haven't). The ways i have found to get a girl interested changes every time because women always differ. The best advice i can give to you is to continue just talking with a girl and make sure you joke around her and smile a lot. If you can talk to them normally and bring up conversations that they are interested in they will become more interested in you. Also keep them on the edge of their seats, you don't have to be spontaneous where you do something different everytime but don't be someone that they will assume to understand just after a few conversations. Being confident is just stupid advice, what you have to do if be true to your character but myserious as well. Don't lie to yourself to make you seem better and don't try to lie to them about who you are. I'm hitting the character limit but let me know whether this was kinda what you were lookin for
User avatar #32 to #6 - mutzaki (05/18/2013) [-]
Any differences like those you mentioned derive from social imprint, and don't have anything to do with the biology of the sexes.
It's more of an individual quality that differs from person to person, rather than something determined by your gender or sex.
Flirting is very different between cultures and what type of person you are. You can be very straight-forward with it, and you can be very subtle, no matter the sex. For example, haven't you heard any of the countless stories from insecure guys on the internet that talk about how they really like a girl, but she doesn't seem to understand or respond to his advances? You shouldn't be excused for flirting too subtly just because you have a vagina, and you shouldn't be blamed for not being able to pick up on the subtlety because you have a penis.

And same applies for responding vaguely or dishonestly to the question "are you okay?" or "how are you?" A person who wants to hide their true feelings can be of either sex/gender just the same, and whether or not the other person seems to pick up on it mostly depends on how convincing you were, or if they just want to give you space.
User avatar #38 to #32 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Incorrect. Women, biologically, have less testosterone and are more submissive (at least most of them are), this means that through the years, instead of having up-front and brunt conversations, as they either lacked the skill, will, or authority for that, they depended upon an ability to 'read' someone's actions and be more scheming rather than brutal. Also, if you noticed, I didn't say that every woman is like that, they just have a natural affinity for it

You're right, flirting is different between cultures, but flirting is not the main point of my paragraph.

I'm not trying to excuse anyone, and honestly I couldn't care less, I just noticed people were having trouble and so I thought it would help. Again, nothing I said is concrete, and can easily be changed with a bit of discipline and understanding. And in the scenario given, we're assuming everyone is telling the truth. It's just an example, after-all
User avatar #46 to #38 - mutzaki (05/18/2013) [-]
Ultimately, we control our own behavior, and if anything, social imprint is a much bigger reason behind the kind of behavior you mentioned. Our differing hormones don't have that high of an effect on us, and I think it's pretty far off to say that "most" girls are more submissive. I never support that one's gender or sex would the reason behind certain behavior. The phrases "I'm a girl, so I'm allowed to [insert irrationality]" and "boys will be boys" really peeve me.
User avatar #47 to #46 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Yes we do, but we also have instincts (instincts that have been honed and drilled into our heads for thousands upon thousands of years). Civilization is actually quite recent, and it boomed very quickly, our instincts still have some time before they can catch up. But I'm not saying it, biology is. Testosterone is a major factor in why many men are daring and aggressive, and women simply have less of it than men do, there's nothing wrong with that, nor am I claiming any sex is weaker than the other. And with good reason, gender shouldn't be used as an excuse for behaviour, but the truth is the truth and the truth is that boys and girls' behaviour are, in fact, different. That's just how it is, but again, with understanding and discipline, we can evolve beyond it
#78 to #47 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
Alright i'm going to interject here cause i want you to understand that behaviors that are shown in todays society are social imprints. Testosterone does lead to aggression but that does not mean that having less will leave you to be submissive. Also if it were not for the distinction that is given from society's pressure, women would not be submissive. To make sure you understand that even today we give off societal pressure to women, as children girls are judged by others (even younger girls) as weird if they don't want to play with dolls but instead want to go outside and play in mud. Not to mention that when a woman rejects a man she cannot blatantly reject his advances without being called a bitch when the man tells others that he was rejected by her. Women today have been raised with the idea of differences between a mans behavior and woman's behavior. Obviously there are differences between men and women biologically but you can't say that it's due to instinct and testosterone
User avatar #80 to #78 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
I do understand that, but behaviours are also caused by biology and environmental situations. Place someone in a stressful environment and their behaviour changes rapidly, even messing with someone's belief system will do this. Testosterone leads to aggressive action and a competitive drive, it is also the foundation for these things (and no, testosterone is not only limited to males, females have it as well, although usually in smaller amounts. This can be changed easily as well, as testosterone, just like with adrenaline, increases or decreases based upon the situation you are in. A calming scenario requires less testosterone, while a hectic or challenging one will produce more of it. But please keep in mind I never said it was the 'make and break'. And yes it does mean that, when you lack a competitive or motivational drive, you become submissive in nature, that's simply how it works. Submissiveness is simply the lack OF drive).

You seem to believe my paragraph was about how women are fundamentally flawed, while it was not. My paragraph and argument has absolutely nothing to do with the 'restrictions and oppression of women', nor do I care about it. I was simply explaining that women are more tactile than men, they are more tactile naturally because most women do not seek out conflict, rather avoiding it (for whatever reason this is, is of no concern of mine), they do not seek it out because they have naturally lower testosterone levels than most men, but this can be changed easily. If you notice, nothing in my argument is an 'end all', EVERYTHING has variables and every rule has its exceptions, but arguing over semantics does absolutely nothing and is a complete waste of time
#84 to #80 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
I would not use the term submissive in this instance then, because to be submissive is to give in and become obedient. If anything you should use Passive because they won't as likely driven by aggression as often. My whole point in my paragraph was to not show the oppression of women because that would be for a different topic. It was all over your usage of submissiveness. Women aren't submissive due to their lower testosterone they are submissive due to the fact they are raised to be submissive and act in certain ways. That was my whole argument. You may be lacking drive but that does not automatically mean you are submissive you just are a passive existence.
User avatar #85 to #84 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Right, passive, my mistake. Thank you for correcting me. In this instance then we are both correct, me if I use passive, you if I use submissive
#88 to #85 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
No problem, what you are saying was correct the submissive part was just bothering me lol.
User avatar #157 to #47 - mutzaki (05/18/2013) [-]
On average, men's and women's behaviors are different from each other, yes. And yes, I'm not saying that our hormones don't have any effects on us. However, here's the crunch; you very much underestimate society's impact on us, and leave too much to be explained by hormones. If you see a pumped up, fight-friendly guido in a night club, up in another guy's face, would you seriously think "ah, yes, what a fine specimen of the male human. Let's see which male will end up the victor"? Everything from him being a guido to him being violent is the result of how he most likely hangs around with other violent people, and has probably been taught all the way from his childhood in one way or another that he should be violent to be seen as a manly man, or to get women. Someone who has had a much less violence-endorsing childhood than he, will more than likely grow up to be a lot more passive and rational in their behavior.

Another thing would be, if you look at tomboys who were raised by older brothers, that even though their estrogen levels aren't different from other girls', they still act masculinely, simply because of their environment. Vice versa as well with brothers growing up with sisters.

Again, I know that hormones have somewhat of those effects on behavior, but unless we're talking about people with really abnormal levels of a hormone, then we are simply beyond that nowadays, and social imprint has taken over. You seem to agree that people who act opposite of what they're "supposed to" based on their hormones, are results from social influence. We differ in that I strongly believe the same goes for the other way around, and that we are born blank slates, but you believe our hormones predestine how we behave if you take away social influence. I may be a bit off in if that's what believe, and if so, I'm sorry.

Anyway, I honestly don't think we'll get anywhere with this, so I say we should just drop it.
User avatar #254 to #157 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
I know full well the effect of society's impact and also take it into account, but I also believe that instincts and hormones that have been honed for millions of years beat the effects of social rearing, seeing as society changes VERY frequently

That's very true, but that also leaves a lot unexplained. There are some kids who grow up in great homes, yet deliberately go out and cause trouble. There are others raised around killing and crime who grow up to make great changes for the better. Environment and social standing don't make and break what kind of a person you are, rather, they just offer experiences that you interpret in your own specific way

That's not totally true. When faced with competition and clashes, testosterone levels increase regardless of whether you are male or female (while oestrogen levels stay the same).

Indeed I do believe that. I never said hormones predestine the way we behave or are, I just believe that you are born with certain imprinting already intact, I.E. you interpret things a certain way, everyone does individually, regardless of how they are raised, every situation you are faced with and everything you get from these situations just depends on how you choose to interpret it (as you CAN also change how you interpret it, but it still must be that way). In that sense, a truly good person will be good no matter what hardships while a truly evil person will be evil no matter what blessings, some people just see and comprehend differently. It's alright

Eh, very well. Although you do make some excellent points
User avatar #34 to #6 - jrondeau **User deleted account** (05/18/2013) [-]
Oddly enough, I think your comment just made me realize that I associate higher levels of reliance on body language and other forms of non-verbal communication with higher levels of insecurity and incompatibility for some reason.
User avatar #40 to #34 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Eh, it can be. It's very easy to tell when someone is insecure or nervous with their body, but confidence can also be shown as well
User avatar #43 to #40 - jrondeau **User deleted account** (05/18/2013) [-]
True. I used to be able to read all the signs in body language relatively well (at least in my opinion) and that in part netted me a fantastic relationship with an ex-girlfriend for a year and a half that I ended up breaking off. After getting with another girl who sends the most infuriating mixed signals imaginable, I now realize that I just haven't ******* cared at all about that stuff because when I do now I just get ****** by mixed signals, even though non-verbal communication is really important with most women. I need to focus on that stuff more again.
User avatar #36 to #34 - jrondeau **User deleted account** (05/18/2013) [-]
Thank you sir. I used to be able to work incredibly well with body language and enjoy it thoroughly in conversation, but recent events have changed that somehow. I need to rethink my thought processes regarding how I interact with women.
User avatar #44 to #6 - thorsragnarok (05/18/2013) [-]
well then captain, **** it all. i'll go to bed now.....
#141 to #6 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
Haven't you copy/paste this from another content? or is it just yours and you did not want to retype it all?
User avatar #245 to #141 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Don't worry, it's mine. Although I wouldn't care if people copied and pasted it to content (I figure that if this content is reposted, so should my comment, and it seems a lot of people enjoy it)
#170 to #6 - Bricehager (05/18/2013) [-]
Damn, hadn't thought of that. You're a smort gui
User avatar #81 to #6 - BillyRyan (05/18/2013) [-]
I sometimes envy gay men. I suppose they've got it right.
#130 to #6 - redtooth (05/18/2013) [-]
This also explains why girls accuse you of cheating when all you did was have a muscle spasm
This also explains why girls accuse you of cheating when all you did was have a muscle spasm
User avatar #185 to #6 - jajathezombie (05/18/2013) [-]
And then there are the guys who think "she smiled at me" means "she wants the D"
User avatar #246 to #185 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Haha, indeed. Arrogance can be a downfall of many
#68 to #6 - crazyoljew (05/18/2013) [-]
You have opened my eyes, good sir. Thank you
You have opened my eyes, good sir. Thank you
User avatar #14 to #6 - doodogger (05/18/2013) [-]
You are very wise.
User avatar #16 to #14 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Thank you very much. It's actually part of a book I'm writing. The first chapter is about how to get sexual/passionate relationships with the opposite (or same) sex, the second chapter (incomplete) is about fighting/conquest, and how to win any battle whether in a personal fight or on a battle-field

Every chapter is broken into two parts, one, how it works, two, how you make it work FOR you
User avatar #17 to #16 - doodogger (05/18/2013) [-]
Do you study psychology?
User avatar #19 to #17 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Not academically, but as a hobby. It's also in the book (required, as there are chapters focusing on motivation and happiness)
User avatar #20 to #19 - doodogger (05/18/2013) [-]
Sounds like a book worth reading. I also study psychology as a hobby.
User avatar #21 to #20 - MysticTomatoe (05/18/2013) [-]
can you refer me on a good psychology book, for science?


no really, I actually plan on taking a few classes on psychology in college
User avatar #23 to #21 - doodogger (05/18/2013) [-]
I use psychologytoday . com, psychology.about . com, and apa . org. You can also use the DSM4 (or DSM5 when it comes out) DSM = Diagnostic and statistical manual for mental disorders.
#25 to #24 - doodogger (05/18/2013) [-]
Are you being sarcastic?
#30 to #25 - MysticTomatoe (05/18/2013) [-]
not at all, this will probably help me a lot, more than you think
User avatar #48 to #30 - doodogger (05/18/2013) [-]
Oh cool then you're welcome.
User avatar #125 to #16 - RamzaBeoulve (05/18/2013) [-]
Sounds pretty good, actually. I want it.
User avatar #210 to #16 - hotschurl (05/18/2013) [-]
10/10 would buy
User avatar #156 to #16 - danniegurl ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
that's cool, i i read a body language book (and was really upset when my mom's bf threw it away thinking no one would read it. it wasn't even mine, it was my grandpa's) so i might like your book too.
#58 to #6 - howuncreativeofme (05/18/2013) [-]
any tips on how I can make a guy I like know it? we have been meeting up once a week for almost 2 months now, always for a drink at the same place. conversation is always enjoyable, rich, and lasts for several hours. honestly never met a guy who i clicked with so well. but no progress! I cant tell if this is just a good friendship or if we are both waiting for the other to make a move. I want him to make the first move, but how do I let him know that he won't be rejected? Please give genuine advice, fj
User avatar #63 to #58 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
It's actually more easy than you think, simply bring up the topic of relationships, he obviously knows you're single so bring that up and go for a compliment (I.E. "Oh well, perhaps I'm just lacking X and X qualities to get a boyfriend"). If he likes you, he will obviously interject and explain that you're more than worthy of a boyfriend and may find one soon, WHEN he says this, simply brush it aside and say "Ya, but I need a man like you, not a boy" and touch his hand lightly. If he's bright, he'll get the message. If not, you should find yourself a better guy

(Note: This is only an example and varying situations will yield varying results, but the principle's the same. Let him know that you are attracted in him and desire a relationship, he should pick up the slack. Or, you could always ask him out yourself and save a lot of time and trouble, plus I'm sure he'd be really pleased)
User avatar #120 to #63 - vZaaa (05/18/2013) [-]
Would be fun if the girl said "Oh well, perhaps I'm just lacking X and X qualities to get a boyfriend", and the other dude would be just like "k".
User avatar #144 to #120 - rieskimo (05/18/2013) [-]
That's my brother right there in a nutshell. I love him but he is absolutely socially retarded.

I brought him to a blacklight party that a couple of my friends were having. My brother is physically attractive I would say based on the amount of strange(as in strangers not as in odd) ladies have approached him in one form or another. However, my brother can't strike a conversation for the life of him and he generally just comes off as retarded. Anyway, in the party he was hanging out in a corner just taking in the sites when a 7/10 approaches him. She starts trying to strike up a conversation and after that doesn't go too well(again socially retarded) she tells him "This party is getting pretty lame... I really just wish somebody would take me away from here".
My brother isn't even making eye contact with her and is just idly nodding his head in agreement through their "conversation" but after she said that his response was "Yeah, that's too bad that you don't have a ride or anything" full stop.

I just heard this all going down and just about died from laughter.
#194 to #144 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
Your brother is my hero. Even if it isn't on purpose the fact he can bring conversations to a stop like that i find hilarious
User avatar #195 to #194 - rieskimo (05/18/2013) [-]
You wouldn't even believe it, the look on her face was amazing. It was a mix of "What the **** ?" "Are you kidding me?" and a little bit of sadness.
User avatar #154 to #144 - danniegurl ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
kinda want to know what your bro looks like now.
User avatar #198 to #154 - rieskimo (05/18/2013) [-]
I'd post pictures, but that's kind of a breach of privacy.
Sorry. If it were just about anybody else but my brother I wouldn't care as much.
User avatar #199 to #198 - danniegurl ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
no, i understand. that's why i didn't ask you to post a pic.
#179 to #63 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
There's a false premise in your statement, you assume he'll be willing to make the first move but a lot of guys (myself included) simply don't want to or are even afraid to make the first move.
User avatar #248 to #179 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
No, I'm assuming he's willing to follow up on HER first move. If you are afraid or unwilling to take initiative, that's fine, but be aware that opportunities (and not just in relationships, but even such things regarding business, or learning, or adventure) will not wait for you, and others more daring and bold will latch onto them quite quick. Life favours those who are prepared to go the extra mile and take an extra leap
User avatar #64 to #58 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Men work differently than women, of course as you know; and it's fundamental to understand how they work in order to properly prepare and guide yourself through them. In essence, males respond more to ego. They enjoy being the alpha male and in control of the situation (even if you have a male who is quiet and reserved, or enjoys chaotic environments, he is still in his comfort zone and thus master of his own world and controlling it). If you want to impress him, do not hang on his arm, but give him a challenge, give him a REASON to like and appreciate you more than just an emotional cushion, let him know that you have absolute standards and that he has passed them, it'll be a bigger ego boost than giving him a million compliments. Just as well, by doing this you inspire him to keep improving to match your standards, and he will be happier and better for it, which will inspire YOU to improve to keep up, thus a positive relationship is formed based off mutual respect and admiration. Giving anything too easily lessens the value, this includes such things as compliments and sex (pro-tip: Statistically, relationships last longer the longer you withhold sex. That is, for meaningful relationships rather than just purely sexual or passionate ones).

However, men do not like being SHOWN UP in what they enjoy. If you, say, best him at a game he loves and then flaunt it over him, it will only serve to upset. You can still beat him and be better than him at things, just be sportsmanlike about it

Also, there are some boys (yes, boys, because there is a difference between men and boys) who dislike anything resembling superiority or constructive criticism. I would suggest you leave this type of relationship as soon as possible

Do you need any more advice or explanation?
User avatar #66 to #64 - howuncreativeofme (05/18/2013) [-]
You have definitely given me a lot to think about! And I really appreciate it. It just annoys me that a whole 'game' has to be played out in these sort of early stages between two people. Im not naturally very flirty, so if I want to do some of the things which you have suggested, I will really have to go out of my comfort zone. But still, thanks for taking the time to explain this 'art-form' to me!
User avatar #69 to #66 - captainfuckitall (05/18/2013) [-]
Believe me, life favours those who take plan, examine, and take initiative, this is true in all aspects of life from romance to business. When you go out of your comfort zone, you get an understanding of exactly who you are, and with self-understanding comes growth
User avatar #215 to #58 - hotschurl (05/18/2013) [-]
Just tell him you're interested. Best case: So is he, Worst case: He's flattered but has to decline. Personally I don't believe that telling someone you're romantically interested in him or her will destroy an existing, solid friendship.
If one of my female friends whose friendship i honestly cherish and enjoy told me and I had to reject her why the hell would i dislike or ignore her afterwards? Things might be a little awkward for some time after such an event but a solid friendship should be able to withstand that and get back to normal eventually, in my opinion.
#192 - blaankie (05/18/2013) [-]
MFW I find out a girl likes me
#89 - EdwardNigma (05/18/2013) [-]
I can't pick up on anything like that, I don't pick up on hints or gestures because I don't have good enough social skills to know how AND because I generally assume everyone hates me by default.

Ah, the wonders of incredibly low self esteem and self hatred.
User avatar #196 to #89 - fukkendragonite (05/18/2013) [-]
I understand how that self esteem problem feels, but let me tell you, that in itself is incredibly self centred and egotistical. People have more important things to worry about than hating you. They have no opinion if they don't know you.

Same goes for the self hatred. If you hate yourself, don't focus on it. Try to make other peoples lives better. Help other people and it'll help you forget how much you suck. If you don't think you're worth the effort of doing anything good for yourself, then look after the people who you do think deserve it. Dedicate yourself to helping your family and friends and keep a positive attitude. It really will help you block out your own feelings about yourself.

What ended up happening with me was that I tried to help other people because I didn't value myself as a person at all. I don't think I really did much, but people started to thank me a lot and say nice things about me and I started to feel more confident in my own skin. In return for me being nice to them, they made me feel good about myself. That's what life is about.

Live and let live- and dream big.

Based on my own experiences. Sorry for the lecture.
User avatar #205 to #196 - EdwardNigma (05/18/2013) [-]
I do try to help people, but I can't keep a bright attitude being the cynical, angsty **** that I am.

Plus, I take the "Everyone hates me" thing from most people disliking me when they first talk to me, or even when they first see me. More people dislike me than like me at this point, so statistically, people are more likely to dislike me.
User avatar #206 to #205 - fukkendragonite (05/18/2013) [-]
I feel that man. But it'll turn around for you. I swear to you it will. I only ask that you read and understand the advice given, nothing more.
#249 to #196 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
You see, I try to help others and be a nice person and people do thank me and say nice things, but at the end of the day no matter how hard I try to befriend these people, they ignore me except to say "thanks" or "you're awesome". It's all just empty compliments. They appreciate me, but don't bother to try and hang out with me or have a complete conversation with me.
#250 to #249 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
In addition to that, any time I'm visibly upset about something everybody seems to turn a blind eye. Nobody bothers to ask me "Are you okay?" or simply be a friend when I need a shoulder to lean on. These are all feelings that I've never been able to communicate to people in real life because nobody cares.
User avatar #251 to #250 - fukkendragonite (05/18/2013) [-]
Don't do it for the recognition, do it because you don't value yourself. Find at least one person that is worth the effort, whether that's family or friend, and make them feel good about themselves. If you believe you're worthless and a waste of space, then why not try to make someone who is worth something happy
#256 to #251 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
You don't understand. I DON'T "do it for the recognition". My point is that I already do those things, but I still don't have any friends. There's not much else I can do.
You can be a caring, helpful person all day long but you're still going to feel like **** if you're constantly lonely. It is great to love and help others, but that alone will not bring you happiness. I need a friend, somebody to talk to and do things with, but I can never get that close to people.
User avatar #258 to #256 - fukkendragonite (05/18/2013) [-]
Let me tell you that you're preaching to the converted mate. All I'm trying to say is that you have to find a distraction. You have to find SOMETHING to focus on to take your mind away from feeling ****** but I know that's easier said than done.

The way I do it is by trying to make other people feel good. Seeing people happy makes me kind of happy.

I don't think I have had anyone I could truly call a friend in maybe 7 years or so. People treat me like total **** , and I ******* hate it. But I never give up trying, because all I want to do is create happiness. If I can't be happy then someone else should be. That's a little bit of consolation don't you think?

I just try to count my blessings. At least my family give a **** . My brothers are the closest friends I could ever ask for. My parents always gave me everything they could. Try not to focus on what you don't have, and focus what you do have. When you do that, you at least put a small smile on your face, even if it's forced.

Count your blessings, try to stay positive, and try to make other people happy. What's the alternative? Sit around and feel sorry for yourself? That may seem like the simplest thing to do, but you're worth more than that.

Honest to **** mate, I understand completely. You might think I don't, but I do.
#259 to #258 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
Yes, you are right there, and I still do keep trying. I only thought you were saying that doing this would completely fix this problem. I try to function normally and appear to most days, but at least one day every month and several nights a weeks I just break down. It seems I can cover up the problem, but it still doesn't go away.
User avatar #260 to #259 - fukkendragonite (05/18/2013) [-]
Sometimes you can't drown your demons if they know how to swim. Sometimes you just have to embrace your flaws and accept them, and learn to live with them. Who knows, you might surprise yourself and rid yourself of the problem altogether. But sometimes you do have to take a step back and accept that certain things make you who you are, and you have to take a deep breath and prepare to deal with it in your own way.
#94 to #89 - champaigne (05/18/2013) [-]
No you're pretty normal. Everybody else does, in fact, hate you by default. But that's because they are, in fact, insecure and lacking in social skills.   
   
   
   
Can't help you with the self hatred thing tho. Get over it
No you're pretty normal. Everybody else does, in fact, hate you by default. But that's because they are, in fact, insecure and lacking in social skills.



Can't help you with the self hatred thing tho. Get over it
#97 to #94 - nignacio (05/18/2013) [-]
FINALLY I get to use this.
User avatar #99 to #97 - champaigne (05/18/2013) [-]
Don't shoot the messenger
#98 to #96 - champaigne (05/18/2013) [-]
Truth hurts man. Butt it's a good hurt. Pic related..?
#26 - epicburana ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
Isn't this a sign enough?
Isn't this a sign enough?
#119 to #26 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
Has been a while since the last Ariana picdump here...
User avatar #161 to #119 - xecoq (05/18/2013) [-]
yh maybe with some Victoria Justice in there as well?
User avatar #100 to #26 - ilikebuttsex (05/18/2013) [-]
i love ariana grande...

so... cute.. yet... looks.. so... kinky
User avatar #29 to #26 - jewsburninindaoven (05/18/2013) [-]
She wants the D
User avatar #108 to #26 - cabbagemayhem (05/18/2013) [-]
She looks like she disagrees with what was just said, but is trying to hide it.
User avatar #53 to #26 - gcloud ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
no
0
#202 to #53 - adplum has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #52 to #26 - haydn (05/18/2013) [-]
I don't know why, but this made me realise how long it's been since a girl has been into me. **** you.
User avatar #92 to #52 - sebthebrony (05/18/2013) [-]
A girl has never been into me.
**** you
User avatar #131 to #92 - blastblood (05/18/2013) [-]
I have never been into girls, **** me
User avatar #140 to #131 - gianttophat (05/18/2013) [-]
I have never been in a girl, **** me
User avatar #188 to #140 - crabcorehero (05/18/2013) [-]
i have never been in a **** , girl me.
#213 to #188 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
I have never been in a ****** , ****** me.
User avatar #242 to #188 - sebthebrony (05/18/2013) [-]
i have never **** in a girl, been me
User avatar #270 to #242 - crabcorehero (05/19/2013) [-]
i **** been in have, never me.
#207 to #92 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
To your knowledge. But the likelihood is that girls have been into you without your knowing, and they've just been really good at hiding it and you've been really dumb at reading their signs.
User avatar #31 to #26 - fuzzysixx ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
I would just assume she has to pee
#255 to #31 - SILENCEnight (05/18/2013) [-]
**SILENCEnight rolled a random image posted in comment #5 at Champion Iris ** its true
User avatar #216 to #31 - imaginariness (05/18/2013) [-]
This +20 times
#224 to #31 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
I'd wanna watch...
#169 - thebritishguy (05/18/2013) [-]
once a girl I liked shook her ass a little as I walked by and then giggled, I glanced down awkwardly and thought "she's probably just joking". WTF am I so virgin?!
User avatar #174 to #169 - cantfindausername ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
A girl straight up told me she liked me and I didn't believe her.
#175 to #174 - thebritishguy (05/18/2013) [-]
and people complain that they are in the friend zone, I know of two girls who I probably put in the friend zone
User avatar #176 to #175 - cantfindausername ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
Dammit, I liked this girl so much.
User avatar #177 to #176 - thebritishguy (05/18/2013) [-]
that's pretty ****** , do you know her phone number or something?
User avatar #178 to #177 - cantfindausername ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
Oh, geez. It was about four-five years ago. But still, I would still liked to have seen how it would have worked out. She was cute as **** .
I have a girlfriend now!
#180 to #174 - ironstrike (05/18/2013) [-]
I could beat that.

My crush asked me if I wanted to start going out with her. I was so caught off-guard that I beta-fagged on the spot, thinking one of her friends put her up to it as a joke.

Turns out she really did like me and I never got the balls to ask her out.
User avatar #181 to #180 - cantfindausername ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
Something similar happened to me with another girl:
Her: "I heard you like me."
Me: I was dumbstruck and what came out was a very quiet "Oh.... no..." Followed by me being single still for the next three years.
#257 to #174 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
I feel that both males and females are all experiencing this sense of doubt and it's making us all very lonely and unhappy.
LET'S ALL JUST CRY TOGETHER.
#103 - cmurphyjrjrjr ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
sufficient
sufficient
User avatar #115 to #103 - jorjebicboi (05/18/2013) [-]
she is soo hot...
#204 to #115 - linkheros (05/18/2013) [-]
Shes not hot at all
#57 - faithrider (05/18/2013) [-]
oh i see. you like girls with a landing strip...   
   
that's enough internet for me....
oh i see. you like girls with a landing strip...

that's enough internet for me....
+1
#95 to #57 - palemotherfcker **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#104 - cmurphyjrjrjr ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
"LET US NOW BEGIN COURTSHIP HUMAN"   
   
pretty much got no choice after that right
"LET US NOW BEGIN COURTSHIP HUMAN"

pretty much got no choice after that right
User avatar #223 to #104 - imaginariness (05/18/2013) [-]
Shame everything except the focal point (not going to point it out) looks pretty and dateable
User avatar #265 to #223 - cmurphyjrjrjr ONLINE (05/19/2013) [-]
Yeah I don't like black chicks either
User avatar #149 to #104 - ichbinzweijahrealt (05/18/2013) [-]
OMG imagine that girl giving a cunnilingus to other girl
User avatar #266 to #149 - cmurphyjrjrjr ONLINE (05/19/2013) [-]
giving a cunnilingus
#187 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
I have a hard time differentiating friendliness with flirtation... So a girl smiles at you, what does it mean? What if she's just really outgoing and smiles at everyone?

I missed afew opportunities in High-School I know, but honestly I was so awkward back then(still am, just slightly less so) that I had no idea what to do anyway.
User avatar #217 to #187 - cormy (05/18/2013) [-]
Yeah... I have this very same problem. I don't know how girls draw lines. I swear sometimes 2 girls will make out like it's the last day of their lives and somehow they say they aren't lesbians and don't love each other, they're just really good friends.
User avatar #193 to #187 - arizonastar (05/18/2013) [-]
we are one in the same i missed so many opportunities in HS because I was mega shy and was picked on alot, and being ADD didnt help i feels teh same.
#5 - jusmumbo (05/17/2013) [-]
What she's thinking...
"I'll go this side so you can lift from the other"
Amirite?
#135 to #5 - unoletmehavename (05/18/2013) [-]
Her name is Jada Stevens
User avatar #7 to #5 - usernameluisdjlols (05/18/2013) [-]
her face looks like a dog sneezing
User avatar #150 to #7 - BubsyB (05/18/2013) [-]
Jada Stevens is one of my favorites must admit she's putting on a stupid smile in this though
User avatar #220 to #7 - imaginariness (05/18/2013) [-]
Bless you
#126 - anotherponyaccount (05/18/2013) [-]
**anotherponyaccount rolled a random image posted in comment #466 at It's pop not soda ** what girls think i need
#127 to #126 - anotherponyaccount (05/18/2013) [-]
**anotherponyaccount rolled a random image posted in comment #119 at Title ** what I really need
#129 to #127 - xxfireflyxx (05/18/2013) [-]
**xxfireflyxx rolled a random image posted in comment #96 at Perfect loop **
What you get.
#137 to #129 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
That song.
just got on the radio
3 seconds befor i scrolled down
my life is a lie
User avatar #222 to #137 - articulate (05/18/2013) [-]
I was driving with the instructor once and Dream On by Aerosmith came on the radio and he changed it to that song.
User avatar #219 - samio ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
I think what's wrong here is the fact your confusing interest with arousal.

Most women I believe are looking for a stable, loving relationship, where they can trust their partner, enjoy life till death, and possibly raise a family.

Most guys are pretty much looking for a quick **** and flee.
( I won't lie, I'm kinda like this too when desperate)

Men, if you want that kind of interest, you can just head down your local strip for a cheap night out.

The amount of money you'll spend on the dates before sex compared to the amount you'll spend on a hooker, is substantially higher.

The more you know
#229 to #219 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
And that's why you'll never have any sex
User avatar #230 to #229 - samio ONLINE (05/18/2013) [-]
Have you had any?

Do tell the rest of us your superior chick magnet powers that allow you to drown in pussy on a daily basis.

If not, you have no standing here.
#232 to #219 - Rascal (05/18/2013) [-]
as a (thats why im posting anon) i just wanted to let you know you understand most of us very well. keep doing what your doing man.
+5
#186 - Yesitsme has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #191 to #186 - ilovehitler (05/18/2013) [-]
trouble is finding a girl that isn't disgusted by your presence.
#37 - rhc (05/18/2013) [-]
This is a real tough thing for me. I've been kind of an awkard asshole my entire school career, but this year, my senior year, girls have started being attracted to me. Like, mostly ugly or annoying girls, but also a few really pretty or hot ones too. The problem is I'm still an autistic betafag and I don't know what to do with girls unless they act first. It's not like I'm afraid of girls, I flirt lots, but I seem to have no capacity for romance beyond that.
This is a real tough thing for me. I've been kind of an awkard asshole my entire school career, but this year, my senior year, girls have started being attracted to me. Like, mostly ugly or annoying girls, but also a few really pretty or hot ones too. The problem is I'm still an autistic betafag and I don't know what to do with girls unless they act first. It's not like I'm afraid of girls, I flirt lots, but I seem to have no capacity for romance beyond that.
#41 to #37 - slothism (05/18/2013) [-]
My personal advice I can give to you since just going for it isn't an option for you
Get into a one on one conversation with one of them, those really deep and meaningful ones.
Just beware of the friendzone when you do this
User avatar #153 to #41 - ilolyoucry (05/18/2013) [-]
I don't like getting into those conversations with my girlfriend...
I know that it could make things between me and her better(See my comment above)..
But I just don't know if she is the kind of girl who can take something like that serious,
or even in the right tone.
So, yeah.
User avatar #42 to #41 - rhc (05/18/2013) [-]
that's how awful i am actually; i can get "friend-zoned" even after I'm aware a girl has a crush on me. but i wouldn't call it the friend-zone, because on an individual basis, it doesn't really bother me.
#45 to #42 - slothism (05/18/2013) [-]
For me it was the other way around as I got older I kinda got less popular with the ladies so I had to learn to be more alpha
I had to learn to "go for it" and trust me it was not easy to learn
you'd be sweating balls and your heart would be beating like a ************
I did get turned down twice of my 3 times going for it
But it worked out in my favour in the end

So yeah, honestly best thing to do is to man up bro
User avatar #145 to #37 - VideotapeAxed (05/18/2013) [-]
Just ask them if they want to go for some coffee or to a movie. If they say no move on to the next one.
User avatar #152 to #37 - ilolyoucry (05/18/2013) [-]
Now, you are someone who understands me.
I am just recently having the same problem, and are also beta as **** .
However, before this year I was fat as **** . I started doing Football, Wrestling, and Track&Field this year and lost a **** ton of weight and put on a good amount of muscle..
But I'm still that fat beta at heart, and I don't know what to do when I'm confronted with the problem of a girl eyeing my from across the classroom..
Let me lay out a example for you of this problem:
Contrary to what I have said above, I do have a girlfriend. Only because she is just as weird as I am, though. And this between me and her are really weird right now..(Barely ever seeing each other, and only talking once in a while.) Early in our relationship this other girl messages me on facebook confessing how she likes me and didn't know how to say it..and that if things between my girlfriend and me don't work out to give her a call. So I'm like,"Yeah, cool. Whatevz". BUT, **** gets more cray. This other girl starts messaging me out of the blue, and all her friends keep messaging me about her. So ya' know, I pick up on the mental cues...but I don't like this girl. I'm still in a relationship and don't like flirting with other girls.(Talking and being friends is one thing...but stringing them along while I'm in a relationship is another.) So I talk to her once in a while, never giving her any reason to suspect a thing is going on between us..but she still does think that.
So yeah...I'm a awkward boyfriend who is beta-shy as **** around her and even more so when her friends are around, and I got these two girls trying to get at me and I don't know how to approach the situation.
BUT, I saved a lot of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico.
#72 to #37 - swagbot (05/18/2013) [-]
If you want it, get it.

If you don't don't.

E-Z.

(message me if that isn't specific enough)
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