RPG Hoarder. .. Hoarders people come to Breezehome, Dovahkiin's residence in Whiterun, WH, Skyrim. The Whiterun Guard won't allow entry due to potential health/magical hazard.
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RPG Hoarder

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Views: 56387
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Submitted: 05/15/2013
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#6 - arrisarrad (05/16/2013) [+] (4 replies)
Hoarders people come to Breezehome, Dovahkiin's residence in Whiterun, WH, Skyrim.

The Whiterun Guard won't allow entry due to potential health/magical hazard.

Finally get permission from Jarl's steward to enter house after signing wavers, setting up magical barrier with court wizard and sealing ourselves in specially made, air-tight Dwemer armor suits.

By the Eight, how in Oblivion can a person live like this? Empty soul gems litter the floor, which is absolutely COVERED in ornamental plates, vases, baskets, pots, rolls of paper, and foodstuffs of every imaginable variety. There's ash piles from Gods only know what that are so ingrained into the floor that I don't thing anybody could get them out.

Deeper in, discarded weapons join the pile, old potions, some broken and leaking all over the place, soaking into books and clothes of every shape and size gives a nasty, magical garbage juice smell to the whole place. Ancient weapons of legend stick out of piles of refuse, ready to poke, skewer, incinerate, steal the soul of, or transform people into chickens and must be carefully avoided.

We've reached the second floor. pelts of animals poorly skinned covering piles of armor and rotting food make it hard to tell where to go. A woman is just sitting and eating bread amidst the garbage. The Dovahkiin starts crying, "Oh Lydia, I'm so sorry!"

Found a massive collection of keys, nobody has any idea what they're for. Dovahkiin swears they're worth keeping. Also found mounds of arrows of every variety.

Stumble back down through the main room. How does this even render? Start moving stuff out of the house, accidentally drop a few things, get into big discussion/argument with the guards about people tripping over it. Finally drag everything to some random bandit hideout. Stuff everything inside dead bandit's corpse. Job well done.

Next time on Hoarders: Skyrim, we visit Riften's Mistveil Keep and its resident court mage Wylandriah.


#13 - blbrian (05/16/2013) [-]
>Buy Breezehome
>Get married
>Wife cooks meals n earns money
>Life is good
>One day come back from an adventure
>Some archerdude be sitting in my living room
>Nottodaymotherfucker.jpg
>Start talking to him
>Gives me attitude
>Kill him
>Kill the wife for being a slut
>Kill all the guards who come storming in
>MFW I'm hoarding bodies
User avatar #1 - KylieAnne (05/15/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Do you need these skulls? ...

Yes. I might use them to decorate my house with when I have the patience. It's just they roll a lot.
#5 - thecharliesheen (05/16/2013) [-]
"But I NEED these silver candlesticks! And Arvak's skull will make an awesome mantel piece eventually!"
#15 - ragged (05/16/2013) [+] (4 replies)
I've taken to decorating my homes in Bethesda games. For example, in Fallout 3 you'll find a lovely assortment of bloody skulls on my bookshelf. In the spare room you'll find a combat knife standing on its point upon the table, a bit of Psycho next to the knife, and an assault rifle leaning against the wall.

It's a very Feng Shui inspired design. I hope to add more skulls, perhaps some mutilated torsos, and the remains of my enemies. Preferably on a pike, but I'm not picky.
#12 - pineapplechunkss (05/16/2013) [-]
Now go Fus Ro dah and shit will crash
#9 - felixjarl ONLINE (05/16/2013) [+] (4 replies)
Comment Picture
#34 - mummyslittlebitch (05/16/2013) [-]
Skyrim should be used to teach children organizational skills.
User avatar #22 - jdizzleapplepie (05/16/2013) [-]
Fus Ro Dah!
#60 - falloutreaper (05/16/2013) [-]
Dwemer scraps almost useless BUT I CAN'T NOT HAVE IT!!!!! I have an irresistible urge to collect any piece of Dwemer metal I find....
User avatar #18 - tacobadger (05/16/2013) [-]
I do this with cheese wheels...
User avatar #2 - lillelise (05/15/2013) [-]
Eh.. Isn't that rather like the back of any shop considering all the crap you sell all the time?
User avatar #43 - khajiithaswares (05/16/2013) [-]
This picture triggers something in me, i can't even... USE A CHEST FOR CHRIST SAKE. sorry
User avatar #59 - funnyjunkianonetwo (05/16/2013) [-]
Am I weird for collecting bloody rags and execution hoods? Or is that normal?
#51 - spanishninja ONLINE (05/16/2013) [+] (4 replies)
#32 - devout feminist (05/16/2013) [+] (3 replies)
Name: Nerd
Profession: Gamer
Virgin since: entire life
User avatar #33 to #32 - bitchplzzz (05/16/2013) [-]
Good job giving yourself that +1

sperglord
#7 - devout feminist (05/16/2013) [-]
before it loaded i thought it would be a bunch of dead people using pgs on cod.. RPG HOARDER
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