RPG Hoarder. .. Hoarders people come to Breezehome, Dovahkiin's residence in Whiterun, WH, Skyrim. The Whiterun Guard won't allow entry due to potential health/magical hazard.
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[ 66 comments ]
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#6 - arrisarrad (05/16/2013) [-]
Hoarders people come to Breezehome, Dovahkiin's residence in Whiterun, WH, Skyrim.

The Whiterun Guard won't allow entry due to potential health/magical hazard.

Finally get permission from Jarl's steward to enter house after signing wavers, setting up magical barrier with court wizard and sealing ourselves in specially made, air-tight Dwemer armor suits.

By the Eight, how in Oblivion can a person live like this? Empty soul gems litter the floor, which is absolutely COVERED in ornamental plates, vases, baskets, pots, rolls of paper, and foodstuffs of every imaginable variety. There's ash piles from Gods only know what that are so ingrained into the floor that I don't thing anybody could get them out.

Deeper in, discarded weapons join the pile, old potions, some broken and leaking all over the place, soaking into books and clothes of every shape and size gives a nasty, magical garbage juice smell to the whole place. Ancient weapons of legend stick out of piles of refuse, ready to poke, skewer, incinerate, steal the soul of, or transform people into chickens and must be carefully avoided.

We've reached the second floor. pelts of animals poorly skinned covering piles of armor and rotting food make it hard to tell where to go. A woman is just sitting and eating bread amidst the garbage. The Dovahkiin starts crying, "Oh Lydia, I'm so sorry!"

Found a massive collection of keys, nobody has any idea what they're for. Dovahkiin swears they're worth keeping. Also found mounds of arrows of every variety.

Stumble back down through the main room. How does this even render? Start moving stuff out of the house, accidentally drop a few things, get into big discussion/argument with the guards about people tripping over it. Finally drag everything to some random bandit hideout. Stuff everything inside dead bandit's corpse. Job well done.

Next time on Hoarders: Skyrim, we visit Riften's Mistveil Keep and its resident court mage Wylandriah.


User avatar #45 to #6 - HardyUndertook (05/16/2013) [-]
I can't wait for the next installment
User avatar #39 to #6 - YllekNayr (05/16/2013) [-]
that was excellent
#48 to #6 - anon (05/16/2013) [-]
how does this even render, brilliant
#58 to #6 - botherandbefuddle (05/16/2013) [-]
"By the Eight"
#13 - blbrian (05/16/2013) [-]
>Buy Breezehome
>Get married
>Wife cooks meals n earns money
>Life is good
>One day come back from an adventure
>Some archerdude be sitting in my living room
> ******************** .jpg
>Start talking to him
>Gives me attitude
>Kill him
>Kill the wife for being a slut
>Kill all the guards who come storming in
>MFW I'm hoarding bodies
#5 - thecharliesheen (05/16/2013) [-]
"But I NEED these silver candlesticks! And Arvak's skull will make an awesome mantel piece eventually!"
#4 - ragingflamingos (05/16/2013) [-]
User avatar #1 - KylieAnne (05/15/2013) [-]
Do you need these skulls? ...

Yes. I might use them to decorate my house with when I have the patience. It's just they roll a lot.
User avatar #3 to #1 - thewebspinner (05/16/2013) [-]
-What about all these ears?
-Huh?
-The ears. These ones next to all the toes.
-Oh, right. I'm saving them for alchemy and stuff...
-They're really moldy. Are you sure you need them?
-GODDAMIT WOMAN!! I MIGHT USE SOME OF THIS STUFF LATER! I JUST NEED A BIGGER HOUSE!!!
#15 - ragged (05/16/2013) [-]
I've taken to decorating my homes in Bethesda games. For example, in Fallout 3 you'll find a lovely assortment of bloody skulls on my bookshelf. In the spare room you'll find a combat knife standing on its point upon the table, a bit of Psycho next to the knife, and an assault rifle leaning against the wall.

It's a very Feng Shui inspired design. I hope to add more skulls, perhaps some mutilated torsos, and the remains of my enemies. Preferably on a pike, but I'm not picky.
#25 to #15 - europe (05/16/2013) [-]
#31 to #15 - brucemuffinz (05/16/2013) [-]
Blood bags?
User avatar #23 to #15 - Loopholes (05/16/2013) [-]
I put an empty nuka cola bottle on a upside down bucket near my door, I am best interior designer.
#27 to #15 - TastyBurger (05/16/2013) [-]
I filled the bath tub in the Pre War Suite in Tenpenny Tower with all the Pre War Money I had. Same with the tub in the Penthouse Suite in New Vegas.
#12 - pineapplechunkss ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
Now go Fus Ro dah and **** will crash
#9 - felixjarl ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #10 to #9 - gytisout ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
is he kill?
#11 to #10 - felixjarl ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
Nope, just a flesh wound.
#19 to #9 - byodensbeard (05/16/2013) [-]
The **** even happened there?
User avatar #20 to #19 - felixjarl ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
Some sort of air canon.
#34 - mummyslittlebitch (05/16/2013) [-]
Skyrim should be used to teach children organizational skills.
User avatar #50 to #46 - kiratheunholy (05/16/2013) [-]
It's happened to me before too. It just matters how many people see it within the first hour usually. Cause 95% of FJers only browse highest uploads, not newest.
User avatar #56 to #46 - thegifmaster (05/16/2013) [-]
Oh
User avatar #57 to #56 - potatophucker (05/16/2013) [-]
Meh. Who cares?
#47 to #46 - raxmus (05/16/2013) [-]
I know man, its funny junk
I know man, its funny junk
User avatar #49 to #47 - yologdog (05/16/2013) [-]
Hercules!
User avatar #22 - jdizzleapplepie (05/16/2013) [-]
Fus Ro Dah!
#60 - falloutreaper (05/16/2013) [-]
Dwemer scraps almost useless BUT I CAN'T NOT HAVE IT!!!!! I have an irresistible urge to collect any piece of Dwemer metal I find....
User avatar #18 - tacobadger (05/16/2013) [-]
I do this with cheese wheels...
User avatar #2 - lillelise (05/15/2013) [-]
Eh.. Isn't that rather like the back of any shop considering all the crap you sell all the time?
User avatar #43 - khajiithaswares (05/16/2013) [-]
This picture triggers something in me, i can't even... USE A CHEST FOR CHRIST SAKE. sorry
User avatar #16 to #14 - blarghagh (05/16/2013) [-]
beat me to it
User avatar #59 - funnyjunkianonetwo (05/16/2013) [-]
Am I weird for collecting bloody rags and execution hoods? Or is that normal?
#51 - spanishninja ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
#52 to #51 - spanishninja ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
#53 to #52 - spanishninja ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
#54 to #53 - spanishninja ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
**spanishninja rolls 39**
#55 to #54 - spanishninja ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
#17 - alucardshellhound (05/16/2013) [-]
**alucardshellhound rolled a random image posted in comment #77 at Who Would Have Thought **
#32 - anon (05/16/2013) [-]
Name: Nerd
Profession: Gamer
Virgin since: entire life
#63 to #32 - highlanderone (05/16/2013) [-]
virgin since? so you dont start off as a virgin, you become one through gaming?
#61 to #32 - anon (05/16/2013) [-]
Name: Anon
Profession: Bad troll
Virgin since: entire life
User avatar #33 to #32 - bitchplzzz (05/16/2013) [-]
Good job giving yourself that +1

sperglord
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