McDisasters 22: Jesse, We Need To Cook. Another anecdote from my days as a fry cook at the D. I don't mind OCD people for their cleaning skills out of a fast pa
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McDisasters 22: Jesse, We Need To Cook

McDisasters 22: Jesse, We Need To Cook. Another anecdote from my days as a fry cook at the D. I don't mind OCD people for their cleaning skills out of a fast pa

Another anecdote from my days as a fry cook at the D. I don't mind OCD people for their cleaning skills out of a fast paced environment. But put an alcoholic OCD 26 year old in a McDonald grill, and there's going to be problems. This guy would literally open the freezer to hide his face while he took pulls off his hip flask! He did ok during slow times, but any rush, and his lack of speed became an instant issue. Enjoy the read, Funny Junk! and if you don't like the story, leave a comment and I will give you a thumb anyways!

PART 7 /funny_pictures/4542697/McDisasters+7+Race+Weekend+Madhouse/

PART 8 /funny_pictures/4544444/McDisasters+8+The+Golgothon/

PART 9 /funny_pictures/4546427/McDisasters+9+Decreaser+Death+Cloud/

PART 10 /funny_pictures/4547440/McDisasters+10+The+Ragenadian+Urinal/

PART 11 /funny_pictures/4549438/McDisasters+11+Fellatio+Fun/

PART 12 /funny_pictures/4550919/McDisasters+12+AutoWash/

PART 13 /funny_pictures/4552972/McDisasters+13+The+Birds+and+the+Antz/

PART 14 /funny_pictures/4571052/McDisasters+14+Bus+month/

PART 15 /funny_pictures/4572642/McDisasters+15+Drivethru+not+Walkup/

PART 16 /funny_pictures/4574161/McDisasters+16+Oops+I+Crapped+My+Pants/

PART 17 /funny_pictures/4577568/McDisasters+17+Stoner+Dreds/

PART 18 /funny_pictures/4579456/McDisasters+18+Smokeys+Revenge/

PART 19 /funny_pictures/4580816/McDisasters+19+Dinner+Rush+Mayhem/

PART 20 /funny_pictures/4582475/McDisasters+20+Got+Lucky/

PART21

comanderspy and masterchiefawesome honorable mention

later
knower guy replacing kitty
consists on working grill
ttry to pull rank
ccan' t keep anyone out
kfine, **** it
like a ************
aalso a raging alcoholic
shrinks on breaks
shrinks in grill
shrinks while drinking
creeps his **** together
kirill is cleanest it has ever been
eeverything is fully stocked
knot a crumb or grease splatter to be seen
sandwich maker
swipes the table after every sandwich
tiimes hurting a little
yhave to force him to cook one day
smaking sandwiches
making meat
strains every burger for 5 seconds before
traying it
wlecome annoyed
yhe' s sneaking sips from a flask when he thinks
i' m not looking
ihope to improve times by making him cook
cook than sandwich maker
twerking at
stropping a little shredded lettuce and some
onions while making one order
knotice he' s itching to wipe down the table
ttell him to concentrate on making meat
skeep working, making sandwiches
ggo to drop buns in toaster
ddude runs over and wipes table down
ddoes not dry it
pstart assembling double cheeseburgers
sticks to the wet table
thears as i try to pull it down
ibun flips over
Ionians, pickle, mustard and ketchup all over
the table
gguy flinches like i took a swing at him
ttell him that' s why we don' t wipe table during
lunch rush
zbrush it all on the floor
gguy flinches again
ttell him to man up
yhe starts saying he' s not feeling well
tthe heat from the grill is making him dizzy and
queezy
soco. com
skeep at it for a while
goes even slower
creeps complaining that he' s sick
around like a drunk
astards leaning on the grill
synaps his head back
of puke right on the grill
what the **** man?! get to the bathroom right
fgets to the table
starns left
into my 3/ 4 full waste can
amother ****** ...
stakes the waste can with him to the restroom
stakes 45 minutes in there
ain the intere, i' m left to my table, clean
a grill and still make food for ravenous
customers
shoudl have shut the grill down
said just clean as you go
the frying puke into the grease traps
like a dumpster fire behind a PF Changs
frighting not to add to the pile
aat least none got on the floor
wwould have had to pull out the grill
tthese bitches weigh over 250 lbs
kirill is cleaned, start dropping as much meat as i
can
crooking and making sandwiches myself
feaster than when i have ocd in the grill
vwhen ocd makes it back to the grill, says sorry
man, something got to me
ttell him to stand at the bun station
yhis least favorite place
scrum's everywhere
twerking furiously while he drops buns
Tories to every crumb that comes out
Finally lose patience
ttell manager to get him out of my grill before i
strangle him
goes to the fry station
ahas a heart attack over the loose salt
dissmissed from fries, sent to the coiner
ccan' t get over the tray liners not being
centered on the trays
yyou gotta be ******* kidding me...
dsent to back cash
mdoing dishes
ddon' t hear from him the rest of the day
bonerman the grill
skeep my times down
tries to come back
relaxe at him until he slinks away
phucker never offered me any whiskey
knever allowed in the grill when i' m working
...
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Views: 84925
Favorited: 99
Submitted: 05/15/2013
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Comments(225):

[ 225 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#58 - enamis (05/15/2013) [-]
I swear to ******* god OP, if the very last chapter of this says "I live in a pineapple under the sea" I will ******* find you, and I will kill you
#182 to #58 - anon (05/16/2013) [-]
my god imagine if this whole thing was a set up. oh laurdy
User avatar #210 to #58 - drastronomy ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
make it happen, OP

it will be the greatest ********* of our time
#77 to #58 - kisushima (05/15/2013) [-]
Jesus H. Christ I have a new worst fear now.   
   
Pic unrelated..
Jesus H. Christ I have a new worst fear now.

Pic unrelated..
#194 to #77 - anon (05/16/2013) [-]
source....for uhh....scientific matters?
User avatar #211 to #194 - chupiter (05/16/2013) [-]
Olivia Wilde on Colbert report i believe.
User avatar #212 to #211 - Ryu (05/16/2013) [-]
Nice avatar
User avatar #214 to #212 - chupiter (05/16/2013) [-]
Thanks. I like yours too!
User avatar #205 to #194 - thedudeistheman (05/16/2013) [-]
Fairly certain it's Olivia Wilde. Go nuts.
User avatar #161 to #58 - ompalomper ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
DON'T TEMPT HIM!!!
#72 to #58 - lordraine (05/15/2013) [-]
I had never even considered that.

But now I want it to happen.
#18 - eatchickendaily (05/15/2013) [-]
[drinks internally]
#160 to #18 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
He always has that one line...
#49 - qazsa (05/15/2013) [-]
What was this cheeky little ****** doing out of place.
#144 to #49 - krizzah (05/15/2013) [-]
OP is clearly hiding something from us.
OP is clearly hiding something from us.
User avatar #56 to #49 - frienderman (05/15/2013) [-]
It's there to annoy people with OCD
#35 - holler (05/15/2013) [-]
ocd at the bun station
ocd at the bun station
#224 to #35 - anon (05/17/2013) [-]
THERE ARE NO BUNS IN THE BOTTOM LEFT CORNER
User avatar #78 - brenton (05/15/2013) [-]
>Former server at Japanese steakhouse
>Pothead cook at the kitchen grill in the back for to-go orders
>Handles 15 meals on one half-sized grill, no problem, speedygonzalez.fotografía
>Smokes on breaks
>Boss catches him, orders random drug testing
>Stops smoking, doesn't want to get fired
>Starts ******* everything up and panicking during Friday dinner rush
>Boss: "What the **** is wrong with you today?"
>Cook: "The weed kept me calm. I can't concentrate like this."
>Boss: "... You are no longer subject to random drug testing."
>Never notice a single mistake again
User avatar #67 - Lambda (05/15/2013) [-]
***** let me get this straight: He puked on the grill, and then you guys just scraped it off and kept cooking burgers on there?
User avatar #76 to #67 - ladyxa (05/15/2013) [-]
my thoughts exactly.
User avatar #79 to #67 - fuckmods (05/15/2013) [-]
well whiskey plus the heat from the grill would have killed any and all germs, still disgusting though
User avatar #124 to #67 - ICEDgrunge (05/15/2013) [-]
that's the secretsauce
#11 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
it kind of bothers me that on every one of these posts several people will say ``see you on the front page``. I mean what is the point of those comments. Its really obvious that it will get to front page i mean we all know it will.
#126 - kungfujesusx ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
Petition to change the title to "tales from the Mccrypt"
#233 to #126 - finjin (11/14/2013) [-]
It had better be that is perfect **** to sign.
User avatar #198 to #126 - meganinja ONLINE (05/16/2013) [-]
All in favor say Aye
User avatar #133 to #126 - pivotmasterdm (05/15/2013) [-]
I'd sign that ****
#129 to #126 - hueyfreeman (05/15/2013) [-]
I second this
User avatar #149 to #137 - darkfuzion (05/15/2013) [-]
aye
User avatar #153 to #149 - ddemiddon (05/15/2013) [-]
Yup
#93 - koalasonfire (05/15/2013) [-]
Dumping
#176 - pappathethird (05/15/2013) [-]
op's fw
op's fw
User avatar #167 - cakezs (05/15/2013) [-]
I ******* love the line that's in every McDisaster that has random website and file extensions following it
User avatar #10 - zenjion (05/15/2013) [-]
i feel sorry for the customers. how can you stand the smell of fried vomit and still eat your meal?
#59 to #10 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?
#123 to #10 - hillbillypowpow (05/15/2013) [-]
It's McDonalds, they probably couldn't tell the difference.
User avatar #168 to #10 - cakezs (05/15/2013) [-]
Sounds like a normal meal at McDicks
User avatar #12 to #10 - sirbrentcoe (05/15/2013) [-]
i dont know man. i could hardly keep my food down, and i wasnt even eating.
#25 - pineapplepeople (05/15/2013) [-]
So I like your stories man, but your getting a little ridiculous with the "statement.joke". It's funny but don't get too redundant. Just my two cents.

PS: never eating Mickey D's again.
#70 to #25 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
I know I'm anon, but I just wanted to say that I love the statement.jokes. Keep em going. I think most would agree. You got a thing going there, man. Like, a thing. Don't wreck the thing.
#192 to #70 - pineapplepeople (05/16/2013) [-]
I agree they're funny, I was just trying to warn him from getting redundant/excessive, as paradoxical as that may sound.
User avatar #26 to #25 - sirbrentcoe (05/15/2013) [-]
the nuggets are good
#27 to #26 - pineapplepeople (05/15/2013) [-]
Pink slime?
User avatar #31 to #25 - fuzzysixx ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
thatsthebestpart.meat.sandwhich
#193 to #31 - pineapplepeople (05/16/2013) [-]
See my response to the anon above.
#230 - teenytinyspider (06/08/2013) [-]
To all those who are waiting for the next one, it's not coming.

www.funnyjunk.com/text/4591967/This+is+the+end/

Click that link for more information.
User avatar #136 - buttholee (05/15/2013) [-]
HOW ARE YOU NOT MANAGER YET?
User avatar #173 to #136 - nylak (05/15/2013) [-]
He just admitted to participating in a ridiculous violation of pretty much every basic health code out there, and his coworkers knew about it. If this happened and he still had a job afterwards he should have thanked his lucky stars.
User avatar #9 - navadae (05/15/2013) [-]
i hope i never have to experience the sight and smell of... frying puke

erg
#6 - linktheherooftime (05/15/2013) [-]
I don't think I could work in the Fast Food industry.  How did you even manage to last as long as you did anyway?
I don't think I could work in the Fast Food industry. How did you even manage to last as long as you did anyway?
User avatar #87 to #6 - fivebecomesfours (05/15/2013) [-]
McDonalds just has the worst of it. I personally work at Taco Bell and it's not that bad at all.
User avatar #158 to #6 - rockamekishiko (05/15/2013) [-]
i don't think any of them are real or at least 90% of the content is fake
#218 - demystify (05/16/2013) [-]
Well, SirBrentCoe, I joined funnyjunk just so I can subscribe to your stories.   
>deargodhilarious.my/sides.htm
Well, SirBrentCoe, I joined funnyjunk just so I can subscribe to your stories.
>deargodhilarious.my/sides.htm
User avatar #223 to #218 - redstag (05/17/2013) [-]
i did the same ******* thing, Bros for life
User avatar #145 - tenmillionbears (05/15/2013) [-]
Hey sirbrentcoe do you think you have enough of these stories to make the series as big as Anime Mot Posters?
User avatar #148 to #145 - zafara (05/15/2013) [-]
Or tard stories?
#171 - jjholt (05/15/2013) [-]
>pukes on grill   
>manager lets you keep grilling after simply wiping it down
>pukes on grill
>manager lets you keep grilling after simply wiping it down

User avatar #177 to #171 - xIArcticIx (05/15/2013) [-]
Another great reason I dont eat fast food much
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