Party Hard. . Gimme yew best Fat Female eneeq nzers ml sbe at party strunk as Rehanging with 3 ether friends girls ene beta male fun, small party with ene small
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[ 291 comments ]
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#23 - whoisthatguyable (05/15/2013) [-]
I remember there was this fat bitch at my school, who would always pick on the smaller girls saying that they don't have "Curves" Of course they didn't give a **** , and neither did anyone else. But the one day, fat bitch starts going off on this one girl, who is about five foot five, weighing about 90 pounds. Tiny girl. So fat bitch starts bitching at tiny girl, giving her **** because she lost at least twenty pounds in the last few months. I have no idea how she knew that, but other girl starts crying. She says to the fat bitch that she has an autoimmune disorder and her medication makes her lose dramatic amounts of weight. This hits close to home for me, because my sister has the same problem. Anyway, fat bitch has the nerve to say,"You're a lying **** you anorexic bitch" So I ask her what her excuse for being overweight is, and she says that its from depression. So I say,"What the **** do you have to be depressed about?" And she says because of the death of her parents. So I, in all of my wisdom and witty humor, say,"Did you eat them?" All 200 student in the cafeteria begin laughing their asses off. Fat bitch cries and runs out. Whoisthatguyable saves the day. Thin girl gives me a hug. Fat bitch tries to sue me for harassment, instead gets written up for bullying. Of course everyone forgot about the whole thing a week later but I think it was funny :/

TL;DR Fat bitch gets told, whoisthatguyable is hero of the day
#189 to #23 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
you, sir, are a hero
User avatar #197 to #23 - walhor (05/15/2013) [-]
Please come to my school, we have about 10 of them in my class.
User avatar #243 to #23 - severepwner (05/15/2013) [-]
I'm just going to pretend that you married skinny girl because life should be a good romance story.
User avatar #170 to #23 - oceanfrank (05/15/2013) [-]
you actually had the audacity to make fun of an orphan? I mean I probably woulda said that in my mind but I would handled it a bit better. Woulda told her, "oh. But seriously stop, it's not funny and it's not cool. She has her problems, you have yours, dont make yourself her problems too." or some **** like that. Both situations are terrible but she didn't deserve that.
#180 to #170 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
people need consequences to learn and improve. When someone pulls a dick move and gets away scotch-free they don't become a better person. People need to know there's a line, and get a better sense for it
#269 to #170 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
It aint bad if she's fat
User avatar #272 to #170 - lorkhan (05/15/2013) [-]
I would have said something along the line "And you think it makes it okay for you to bully this girl?" But some people need to get their lesson learned, either hard or sooooooft...
User avatar #204 to #170 - toosexyforyou (05/15/2013) [-]
Start leaving your house a bit more often and you'll realize that some people need that.
User avatar #44 to #23 - deandrummer (05/15/2013) [-]
You have gained my respect and admiration, my good man.
#114 to #23 - patriotpenguin ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #137 to #23 - ohgodwhyme (05/15/2013) [-]
LMAO Bravo!
#155 to #23 - hillbillypowpow ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
You are a good person and I'm proud of you as a human being.
User avatar #40 to #23 - derpmcfly (05/15/2013) [-]
Can I be your friend?
#28 to #23 - intestines (05/15/2013) [-]
I love stories like these. What makes her think that she can make fun of someone ESPECIALLY for something that they can't even help. What a cunt. I applaud you
#33 to #23 - sxeindi (05/15/2013) [-]
sounds like that chick can differentiate between being proud of her body and being a bitch. about time someone called her out on it
#36 to #33 - sxeindi (05/15/2013) [-]
can't***
#109 to #23 - dafq (05/15/2013) [-]
Medications do crazy things man. I was prescribed meds for my add a month ago and I've lost 20 pounds. But kudos to you man for standing up to the whale
#199 to #109 - jakeattack (05/15/2013) [-]
feels man, imagine having 2 meds for adhd and another for depression. lol 3 a day:/
#104 to #23 - zackmorris (05/15/2013) [-]
And at the end of the day, you still made an orphan cry.
And at the end of the day, you still made an orphan cry.
#112 to #104 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
lolz, dat cookie look like a dick
#127 to #104 - GnRNoD (05/15/2013) [-]
That day, was a good day for whoisthatguyable
#7 - grindor (05/14/2013) [-]
#279 to #7 - heartgoldawesome (05/15/2013) [-]
That was great!
That was great!
#27 to #7 - acemanioo (05/15/2013) [-]
that. was. glorious.
User avatar #32 to #7 - stonedplatypus (05/15/2013) [-]
This is just... perfect. I wish I could thumb you to Oblivion
User avatar #34 to #7 - mattseven (05/15/2013) [-]
Makes me hate fatties. GLORIOUS!
User avatar #39 to #7 - nggamer (05/15/2013) [-]
that was ******* awesome
User avatar #118 to #7 - symmiie (05/15/2013) [-]
I don't know why, but my favorite part about that entire story was

>Chillbro bails.
User avatar #12 to #7 - shinycharizard (05/14/2013) [-]
That was the best thing I've read in a very long time.
User avatar #43 to #7 - derpmcfly (05/15/2013) [-]
I wanna find this guy, and give him the highest of all highfives.
User avatar #158 to #7 - ktbmnf (05/15/2013) [-]
thats the best story i have ever heard. please sir, can i have another?
User avatar #161 to #7 - songemot (05/15/2013) [-]
I would pay to see a movie about this.
#21 to #7 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
that was a beautiful story.
#25 to #7 - tubaplayah (05/15/2013) [-]
Amazing. That is the only way to describe this
#278 to #7 - nastoy (05/15/2013) [-]
Thank you kind sir for sharing this fantastic 4chan content with us.
This really improved my day.
#264 to #7 - powellrebecca (05/15/2013) [-]
read this on another similar post, seriously hilarious, and everyone can relate to it for sure   
   
gif unrelated.
read this on another similar post, seriously hilarious, and everyone can relate to it for sure

gif unrelated.
#179 to #7 - penguinsaresexy (05/15/2013) [-]
It's not letting me load it(( and it looks glorious
User avatar #14 to #7 - theRomaniantroll (05/14/2013) [-]
For anyone offput by the length, it's worth the read, and it's funny all the way down so you don't have to wait for a punchline. Also, "I'm a doctor not a miracle worker" I lost my **** .
#184 - tigasingy (05/15/2013) [-]
Personal Fav
#1 - sorrybut (05/14/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#190 - thebannedzombie (05/15/2013) [-]
Long, but so ******* worth the read...
#273 to #190 - iBlondie (05/15/2013) [-]
Worth it.
Worth it.
#283 to #190 - faithrider (05/16/2013) [-]
i didn't want to but i read it anyway. ******* amazing.

<foodbro's face when
#250 to #190 - nuaden (05/15/2013) [-]
*******		 awesome story.
******* awesome story.
User avatar #237 to #190 - popcornisland (05/15/2013) [-]
I just spent 10minutes reading this, Damn good ending.
#93 - patriotpenguin ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
me and friends at my friend joeys  cabin playing our weekly warhammer 40k tournement,and just hanging out    
joey calls, tells us hes gonna be  a bit late   
ah well,commence with the tournement!!   
my turn to battle , start setting up orks, we hear a bang outside    
look out the window and see the local collages frat boys had a bus that broke down just a bit from the driveway    
they take the party inside the cabin,giant cluster of people swarm the table to watch the battle.   
Half hour in the fratboys are loaded drunk and some are cheering me on and others were cheering on my friends imperial gaurds   
a squad of tank bustas destory a leman russ that got mamed by a looted wagon,frat boys on my side of the room start cheering    
my friend harrys baneblade takes a pot shot at flash gitz , misses and completly obliderates  a squad of ork boyz and grotz   
likewise the other side starts cheering then   
about at 3ish in the morning the cops come   
open the door, see a bunch of frat boys chanting urgs (too drunk at this point to say orks) while lifting me off the ground   
laugh their asses off and leave    
NEXT DAY    
wake up, all my stuff is neatly packed up,my friend joey got to the party when everyone was passed out and packed up our models ( turns out the same cops caught him speeding to the party)    
frat boys are gone, urgs is spray painted on the wall   
joey asks how the game was   
mfw
me and friends at my friend joeys cabin playing our weekly warhammer 40k tournement,and just hanging out
joey calls, tells us hes gonna be a bit late
ah well,commence with the tournement!!
my turn to battle , start setting up orks, we hear a bang outside
look out the window and see the local collages frat boys had a bus that broke down just a bit from the driveway
they take the party inside the cabin,giant cluster of people swarm the table to watch the battle.
Half hour in the fratboys are loaded drunk and some are cheering me on and others were cheering on my friends imperial gaurds
a squad of tank bustas destory a leman russ that got mamed by a looted wagon,frat boys on my side of the room start cheering
my friend harrys baneblade takes a pot shot at flash gitz , misses and completly obliderates a squad of ork boyz and grotz
likewise the other side starts cheering then
about at 3ish in the morning the cops come
open the door, see a bunch of frat boys chanting urgs (too drunk at this point to say orks) while lifting me off the ground
laugh their asses off and leave
NEXT DAY
wake up, all my stuff is neatly packed up,my friend joey got to the party when everyone was passed out and packed up our models ( turns out the same cops caught him speeding to the party)
frat boys are gone, urgs is spray painted on the wall
joey asks how the game was
mfw
User avatar #15 - tehcashew (05/14/2013) [-]
>Be 18 at friends house
>fat **** free-loader who lives at his house comes over later on
>everything fine for a couple hours
>then ******** says I bet I could take you Anon, you look like a pussy
>look at him "You sure"
>I'm 6'1" and 205lbs mostly muscle, wrestled, played football and ran track for 3 years
>Best friend is 6'8" or so and around 325, makes me look small
> ******** "yeah I know I can"
>Me, standing up, "alright. Try it then"
> ******** charges me with the force of a thousand doughnuts
>I make slight side-step, grab shoulder, use his momentum roll him mid-air
>His knee touches ground
>breaks on contact
>Makes sound of branded dolphin
>Best friend laughing his ass off
>lean down to ********* ear "Are you sure? Are you totally sure"
>he hides when I come over now
#157 to #15 - allion (05/15/2013) [-]
that was alpha as ****
#191 to #15 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
>breaks on contact
>makes sound of branded dolphin
I laughed so hard I think I pulled an abdominal muscle
#77 to #15 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
> ARE YOU ******* SORRY
#47 to #15 - mushizombie (05/15/2013) [-]
You're an alpha. Lets 			****		.
You're an alpha. Lets **** .
#242 - maciejj (05/15/2013) [-]
>Be me in hs, gay and anorectic (6 feet tall, weighing 120 pounds)
>Fat bitch, or, small and fat bitch
>not only fat, obese
>Walks up to me
>Hey, maciejj, why are you a gay faggott??????????????????
>I don't say anything and just walk on
>for the next two weeks, everytime she saw me she just went like: "Faaaaggot, faaagoot, faaggot"
>Getting fed up with her ****
>one day she hits me while she calles me a faggot
>push her arm away, the fat is shaking
>I get mad
>"Listen here, you fat landwhale bitch. Yes, I am a faggot, but at least I'm not a ******* whale."
>She gets red
>While shaking and being red she tells me that she's fat because of the medication she takes.
>A bunch of people get around to watch
>Alphamode, on.
>"What kind of medicatiion? Hamburgers and cock?"
>She get even more red
>"You faggot, it's because I have a back pain all the time!"
>Doublealphamode, on.
>"It's because your fat is too much for your back to handle, isn't it?"
>Everyone taking my side, starting to clap
>Landwhale runs away crying
Later I found out that it actually was because of the fat being too much for her back
She got in trouble for calling me things and I was so damn proud, feels good.
#247 to #242 - basham (05/15/2013) [-]
You fabulous fagarooni.
You fabulous fagarooni.
#253 to #251 - basham (05/15/2013) [-]
Are you really homo?
#255 to #253 - maciejj (05/15/2013) [-]
Homo as ****
User avatar #257 to #255 - basham (05/15/2013) [-]
That's cool man. You stuck up for yourself. That's takes a lot of guts. And balls.
#263 to #242 - lorkhan (05/15/2013) [-]
This was great.
This was great.
User avatar #208 - timmywankenobi (05/15/2013) [-]
>be me back in grade 9 ,shy kinda nerdy guy
>see morbidly fat girl jenny getting picked on by other girls for being fat .
>feel bad for her.
>Decide to be nice to her and try to be friend
>start talking to her asking her about her day and trying to cheer her up
>she seems a little happier till some popular girls walk by and then she pushes me full force into lockers on the other side of the hall and shouts "eww get away from me you creepy nerd !"
> a little offended but figure she is just trying to impress popular girls so ignore it
>3 weeks pass
>she is upset and crying because no one has asked her out to big dance
>decide to try to become her friend again by asking her to dance
>she say's she would rather stay home and kill herself then be seen with a disgusting nerdy creep like me .
>temper flares volume control lost,everything goes red yell loudly " you're a real bitch you know that ,I mean did it ever cross your mind at any point that maybe people don't like you not because you fat but because your a giant mean spirited ******* bitch who has the hygiene and appearance of a six week old cantaloupe and the personality of a decayed beached whale !! "
>whole hallway goes silent for what felt like 3 or 4 minutes
>jen starts crying and wailing and runs out of the school
> kinda in shock not sure what I just said and kinda feeling bad about it
>everyone starts unexpectedly cheering and clapping
>mentally handicapped kid starts singing ding dong the witch is gone
>jen never comes back to school
>I am treated like a hero for like a week
>still not entirely sure what happened.
User avatar #217 to #208 - toosexyforyou (05/15/2013) [-]
You got some blind rage and told off a fat cunt, the crowd loves people who rage at someone they all hate.
User avatar #222 to #217 - timmywankenobi (05/15/2013) [-]
oh okay I guess that makes sense.
#240 to #208 - yourdonutz ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
10/10 would read again
10/10 would read again
#252 to #208 - atticusspc (05/15/2013) [-]
i liked the part about the handicapped kid
i liked the part about the handicapped kid
#282 to #252 - faithrider (05/16/2013) [-]
i like how you used obama's clapping gif as your pic for the retarded kid...
#186 to #115 - tenmillionbears (05/15/2013) [-]
"400 pound celestial object"
#91 - prontoon (05/15/2013) [-]
oh lord, i absolutely hate this one fat lard ass in my school. Every day this whale sneaks her large manatee friends into the school so they can all eat together in the library. normally i wouldnt mind this however every time they show up with the food court in their purses they go into full grime mode
"oh god, i havnt shaved my pits for a week, look how hairy they got"
"atleast they dont smell like mine, i smell like a sewer. here smell 'em"
every day these McDouble sized girls sit, eat for 25 mins, fart loudly that the floor rumbles with the intensity of a 6.0 magnitude earthquake
User avatar #182 to #91 - mcbrosephson (05/15/2013) [-]
I know that rustling. There is this one girl at my university who probably controls the tides of the ocean with her fat, moon shaped self. Every Tuesday and Thursday, I would chill in the same lounge area as her and over hear her rant about some ******** that smelled better than her rancid self. She rants about how she is so stressed about triple majoring and acts like the planets revolve around her (which is pretty obvious because of her orbit) and she said she is working for a degree in music but absolutely hates musicians like Mozart, Bach, etc. And when she came on the retreats (I go to a Catholic university and I am a leader of the Campus Ministry) one of my friends said that she was getting all bitchy about not wanting to be there but just going anyway because it ticks off her parents or some **** . I even found out that the only reason she is fatter than jabba is because she hates her parents. She is destroying herself because of some dramatic ******** with her parents even though my friend knew her from high school and said that her parents always supported her since she was first able to roll around the floor.This whailord was fat because it seemed like she needed to to prove some fake point. Sorry if the read was long
#87 - sonofposeidon (05/15/2013) [-]
Posted not too long ago. hella relevant.
User avatar #116 to #87 - sonicg (05/15/2013) [-]
Oh god I remember that **** .
User avatar #120 to #87 - Crusader (05/15/2013) [-]
Not as funny
User avatar #83 - mcbrosephson (05/15/2013) [-]
Be junior year in High School (my high school has a student body of about 300 something kids, 82 in my class). Our school is an old church plus it's side buildings and the hallways feel like you're being crammed into a sardine can. I was and am 6'3'' so I am fairly the tallest kid and am able to see above the short stature of the hispanic majority of the school. I am stuck in hall traffic going to lunch. As I wait for the horny couples to move from the path, I hear the voices of the cafeteria slowly die down and two girl voices become the loudest. Bonquiqui the Lard and Watermelondrea the Planet Shaped are starting to argue over over horny black dude about who is the better "lover". As the two get closer and in each others face due to their gravitational orbit, the horny negrite says "I still can't tell who's booty is bigger" (which of course was foolish to say considering that whenever those two sat down it looked like the entire chair was slowly being engulfed by a black blob). Lard and Planet Shaped finally start to brawl for the the horny beta. None could ever be dominate in this fight because when they tried to pin the other down, they would roll off of each other (imagine stacking a ball on top of another one). As the fighting commences one student throws food on top of them just before one of the teachers finally does something about it. The teacher (our all around math teacher who also lifts) grabs the two and just as he is about to pull them away to the principles, he slips on beans or some **** that was supposed to be beans and pulls the fat asses down to the grave with him. Needless to say, that both girls ended up on top of him and cracked a rib in his body. To this day, my former mathematics teacher has a prejudice against anyone fatter than the definition of fat.
#172 - TheCynic (05/15/2013) [-]
I dated a girl in high school who was about a 6/10 I guess. She wasn't fat, but was very curvy with an average waste. She was concerned, however, that she was fat. So she became bulimic and old me about two months into the relationship. I try to help her through the issue, give her encouragement and tell her her body is just fine, etc.

Eventually, she breaks up for me for her asshole ex. He doesn't take her back, and she immediately comes back to me. For three months, she practically begs for me to take her back. When she finally shuts up, I find another girl and date her instead. Out of the blue, old girlfriend texts me and says she wants to hang out. I tell her I can't because I'm dating someone else now. She begins flipping **** when I try to explain to her how it works. She starts calling me ugly and **** .

I warn her twice not to play this game with me.

"You'll never date anyone prettier than me!"
To which I respond,
"Bitch, you have to throw up to feel pretty."

She didn't respond. I haven't heard from her ever again.
#174 to #172 - anon (05/15/2013) [-]
That last comment was probably just a bit uncalled for. Just a bit.
User avatar #175 to #174 - TheCynic (05/15/2013) [-]
I still feel awful about it from time to time.
#183 to #175 - taintedangel (05/15/2013) [-]
Don't.  You just saved yourself from, possibly, an endless cycle of her 			****		.
Don't. You just saved yourself from, possibly, an endless cycle of her **** .
User avatar #207 to #174 - toosexyforyou (05/15/2013) [-]
grow up
User avatar #246 - hunnyshuckumms (05/15/2013) [-]
>Be me
>Work at a restaurant
>Working front counter
>A wild Snorlax appears
>Slowly approaches the counter
>Attempt to converse with the beast
>Tells me she wants ice cream
>Ask her what kind
>Points at a tub of rocky road
>”How much for the whole thing?”
>3 gallon tub
>Hilarity ensues
>She looks me dead in the eye
>Realize she’s serious
>Never been in this situation
> Go to the back and ask manager how much to charge
>Laughs his full head off
>Heads to the front and sells her the entire tub
>Fatty waddles over to a table
>Begins to devour the 3 gallon tub of ice cream
>Eats about half and falls asleep
>Sleeps for about 10 minutes, wakes up, and leaves, tub in hand
>Never see her again
User avatar #270 to #246 - RebelRy (05/15/2013) [-]
I now want to know how much 3 gallons of ice cream would be.
User avatar #245 - darkspiribass (05/15/2013) [-]
Let's see if I can do one of these fat person stories.



>Wake up.
>Piss.
>While washing hands, look in mirror.
#5 - tfixari (05/14/2013) [-]
Oh God I laughed so hard!
Oh God I laughed so hard!
#2 - twi (05/14/2013) [-]
This image has expired
I was working as a mall santa once and this fat tub of **** greasy mexican kid sat on me and ******* **** his pants ON MY DAMN LEG
THEN THAT PIECE OF **** HAS THE NERVE TO TELL ME WHAT HE WANTS ME TO BRING HIM

I hate Mexicans now
User avatar #45 to #2 - cthumoo (05/15/2013) [-]
you spoke to a piece of **** ?
User avatar #26 to #2 - pwnagraphy (05/15/2013) [-]
"Now"?
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