McDisasters 16: Oops I Crapped My Pants. Another anecdote from my days as a fry cook at the D. I have no problem with old people. More times than not, they are

McDisasters 16: Oops I Crapped My Pants

Another anecdote from my days as a fry cook at the D. I have no problem with old people. More times than not, they are much better than the average riffraff you deal with on a day to day basis. But every once in a while, you get someone who's just an asshole. Meet Old Dan. If you can place the literary reference, you win a subscriber! Not only did he destroy my restroom, he busted my balls over a measly 69 cents! Just no pleasing some people.. Anyways, enjoy!















.comanderspy and masterchiefawesome, any thoughts, suggestions, questions?

saunday, early afternoon
to work counter
knew girl quit after the bus episode
icouldn' t handle the stress
running slower
mmy place is in the grill
burnouts filling my station can' t
handle our pace
bus pulls in
citizen center out for the day
afresh from chruch
cooming in for coffee, pies and icecream
pstart brewing coffee, tell the stoners to drop
abus unloads in parking lot
paediatric thriller to the door
ssome of them are literally dancing
ccan' t wait to get their weekly treat
ffirst few make it in the door
aabout the 10th or so
knotice a stench growing stronger
llike the smell of 1, 000 broken dreams mixed
with polymeric
oold dan shuffles in the direction of the
wrest of the bus gets in
aabout of them all together
eevery single person orders the same thing
iapple pie, ice cream cone, senior coffee
69, please
it 40 times, you' d remember it too
oold dan is last to order
ahas shame in his eyes
sstill reeks of death, decay and denture cream
Shounds rough, just bear with me
gguy orders the same thing
69 is your total sir
astards arguing with me over the price
the prices and the tax to him
sstill says its higher than he remembers
ttell him that 39 other people ordered the
exact same thing
people paid the exact same amount
i dont care what they paid, i only pay 2
bucks! periode'
stold him the least he would pay would be
12, 1 buck for an icecream, 1 buck for a pie,
6% sales tax
yhe says its ******** , refuses to pay
t get anything, goes back to the bus
wrest of the octogenarians eat and drink
coffee for about an hour
out like coal miners going back to
ffind it odd none of the men use the restroom
lobby/ restroom sweep after the
crowd leaves
knot much trash or mess in the lobby
aone guy left his cone upside down on his pie
dealt with worse in the past
lobby sweep, breath a sigh of relief
the restroom kit
ahit the ladies first
of adult diapers in the can
of coffee and asparagus hangs in the
arun the trash
ahead for the mens
oopen the door slowly
notice something awry
oold dans stench hits me with the force of a
baseball bat
stall in back has standing water
ahead back apprehensively
oopen door slowly
iused adult diaper covered in ****
scrammed into the bottom of the toilet
oold dan tried to flush his shame
iused the plunger to assist in his efforts
now sticking out of the toilet
llike a soldiers grave on forgien soil
a couple of times while I' m extracting
the war relic
the blockage, half the diaper makes it
thru the terlet
bset to mopping
scatch another wiff of old dans noxious stench
all over my half clean floor
yhave to start over
scatch another wiff
mmake it to the sink
oblast puke all over the counter and mirror
ddo a quick spot clean
awalk to shift manager, tell him he needs to
send in a finisher
ccan' t go back there
its younoob, finish it'
dude, i' ll be in there all day blowing chunks
if you send me back.'
me back in
about 3 more times cleaning
manager tries to write me up for
Aight it, take it to store manager
estore manager sides with me
ssays 'if it made him puke, i can' t imagine
how bad it was..'
parites up shift manager, not sure what for
shires new counter employees same week
For mom McCoys;
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Views: 76013
Favorited: 89
Submitted: 05/05/2013
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#17 - thesirofponies (05/05/2013) [-]
It does seem better than a lot of 						****					 you went through,so that's a small plus.
It does seem better than a lot of **** you went through,so that's a small plus.
#25 - Cleavland Steamer (05/06/2013) [+] (2 replies)
>in olive garden
>having family get together
>my senile grandpa is sitting next to me
>he's high on alzheimer's
>waitress starts taking orders
>looks at gramps "What would you like to drink, sir?"
>everyone prepares to hold in their laughter at his response
>"I'll have a glass of hot water"
>gets his damn hot water and drinks it like nothing's wrong
>food arrives
>he had some pasta or whatever
>waitress offers him shredded cheese
>"Tell me when you have enough"
>he remains silent
>2 minutes later
> ******* enormous mound of cheese on his plate
>people staring at Mt. Parmesan
>mfw every time we go to that olive garden the staff ask about "That old guy who really loved cheese"
#7 - daphnie (05/05/2013) [-]
Dude, I 						*******					 love your stories. Keep posting!
Dude, I ******* love your stories. Keep posting!
#24 - valetparking ONLINE (05/06/2013) [+] (1 reply)
these stories are exactly why i refuse to work at any fast food place.
#36 - cptjoe (05/06/2013) [-]
'like a soldiers grave on foreign soil'
'like a soldiers grave on foreign soil'
#15 - misterkinz (05/05/2013) [-]
**misterkinz rolled a random image posted in comment #61 at Oh Society ** mfw that leg at the end
**misterkinz rolled a random image posted in comment #61 at Oh Society ** mfw that leg at the end
#51 - dafuckisthisshit (05/06/2013) [-]
"shift manager tries to write me up for insubordination"
"fight it, take it to store manager"
"store manager sides with me"
"writes up shift manager"
#8 - woojestonie (05/05/2013) [-]
Mfw reading the whole thing
#47 - whatasickname (05/06/2013) [-]
keep 'em coming, OP. these stories are 						*******					 awesome.
keep 'em coming, OP. these stories are ******* awesome.
User avatar #9 - dzubelyudee (05/05/2013) [-]
You are a god among men, sirbrentcoe. Sacrificing your lunch for the cleanliness of a bathroom is no small feat.
#57 - thisisestonia (05/06/2013) [+] (1 reply)
#34 - switchblayde (05/06/2013) [-]
I lost it at death, decay and denture cream.

pic related to story.
User avatar #29 - starlightloves (05/06/2013) [-]
My boyfriend encounters similar horrifying situations (he works graveyards at our mcdicks). He always reads your stories and he looks so happy that someone understands him so thank you :)
#71 - sparkieemae (05/06/2013) [+] (4 replies)
>Be working at movie theater
>Sets just ended so lobby basically empty except one old man meandering about
>Hasn't gotten to movie yet, probably going to shout that his movie started before he could get to it and he deserves a refund.
>Stocking or sweeping or ********
>He approaches and thanks me for my help
>Haven't actually helped anyone so just respond with 'I'm sorry?'
>'Oh that wasn't you'?
> Bustles over to manager, explains had an employee help him but clarifies it wasn't me.
>Can we just not call me out to my supieriors as unhelpful please
>Go to do restroom check
>Oh god stench worse then dumpster behind humane society in Phoenix
>All stalls empty and clean except handicapped
>Oh god no please don't let this happen
>Return to lobby
>Old man still out there
>Hasting concession about price of rasinettes
>Counter personal 'I'm sorry sir I understand, we are just a movie theater and this is our primary source of profit"
>'Sir the boxes here are counted into inventory we are expected to have a certain about of bank to account for each missing box'
User avatar #94 - iamchicken ONLINE (05/06/2013) [-]
They should make Gasmasks part of the work uniform.
User avatar #19 - mookiez (05/05/2013) [+] (1 reply)
**** pants related. pretty funny.
#20 to #19 - sirbrentcoe (05/05/2013) [-]
the dudes face when ******* walks out.. oh my god..
#14 - prontoon (05/05/2013) [-]
i enjoy these stories, never seen one in newest uploads just on front page.
i enjoy these stories, never seen one in newest uploads just on front page.
#68 - sphinxe (05/06/2013) [-]
You are one brave soul, my friend.
You are one brave soul, my friend.
#54 - probrem (05/06/2013) [+] (1 reply)
> Work at McDonalds.
> Busload of old people order food.
> Cleans up when they leave.
> Some guy shat his diaper and tried to flush it to no avail.
> Totally didn't make up any of these stories and made them unnecessarily long.

There we go. Saved you some time.
#60 to #54 - bokkos ONLINE (05/06/2013) [-]
Saved time while preserving none of the comedic wording or phrases. Good work.
#53 - thearcher ONLINE (05/06/2013) [-]
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