Death and such. .. That autoerotic asphyxiation causes enough deaths to be on this list is startling
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[ 365 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#14 - Cleavland Steamer (04/28/2013) [-]
Obesity kills 30,000 people annually?





I had no idea fat people were such cold-blooded killers....
#1 - iamtheblackgoat (04/28/2013) [-]
That autoerotic asphyxiation causes enough deaths to be on this list is startling
#20 to #1 - flopshel (04/28/2013) [-]
It's basically suicide, although they're not conscious of it? (correct me if I'm wrong) ... it's bound to have a staggering amount of deaths... even if perhaps not a lot of people are affected by it, those that are will most likely die due to that.
User avatar #40 to #20 - bothemastaofall (04/28/2013) [-]
suicide implies you wanted to die.
User avatar #230 to #40 - mrloki (04/29/2013) [-]
that would rule out all accidental suicides, I believe that if you do something that kills you, it's suicide, no matter if you wanted to die or not
User avatar #247 to #230 - bothemastaofall (04/29/2013) [-]
I thought we just those accidents.
An old classmate of mine fell off a bridge and died. We didn't say he committed suicide.
#360 to #230 - anon (04/29/2013) [-]
what if you drive a vehicle every time you get in you have the chance to die while driving be it your fault or not your fault
User avatar #168 to #20 - creosote (04/29/2013) [-]
"Autoerotic" being the key word here.
User avatar #241 to #1 - savvasp (04/29/2013) [-]
I could have swore it was called selferotic ashpyxiation :/
#25 to #1 - anon (04/28/2013) [-]
Number one cause of suicide in men of ages 12 to 23.
#220 to #25 - anon (04/29/2013) [-]
Erm, first off, that would be a *method* of suicide, not a cause. And autoerotic asphyxiation isn't suicide to begin with.
User avatar #228 to #220 - mrloki (04/29/2013) [-]
if it's auto, I consider it suicide ._.
User avatar #315 to #228 - Lilstow ONLINE (04/29/2013) [-]
anon is correct.
you sir, are the faggot.
#271 to #228 - anon (04/29/2013) [-]
That wouldn't make sense.

It's only suicide if they kill themselves with the intention to kill themselves. Otherwise it's an accident.
#335 to #1 - frky (04/29/2013) [-]
Fun fact: this guy died from autoerotic asphyxiation
User avatar #81 - Cambro (04/29/2013) [-]
Black Friday kills 500 people annually

Um, Black Friday is one day a year in only America (I believe). 500 people dying every Black Friday is beyond ridiculous.
User avatar #245 to #81 - scapeartist (04/29/2013) [-]
It's weird how people trample eachother over cheap goods right after being thankful for what they have on Thanksgiving.
#84 to #81 - thrashtilldeath ONLINE (04/29/2013) [-]
It's because there are so many killer deals.
#257 to #84 - anon (04/29/2013) [-]
God ******* damnit this made my day
User avatar #89 to #84 - joltzeke (04/29/2013) [-]
that made me laugh too much xD
#28 - kridane (04/28/2013) [-]
Shopping on black friday kills 500 people a year?
I'm pretty sure thats a U.S. only thing, and if it is then wouldn't they make it a big deal if 500 people died on one day?
User avatar #33 to #28 - ablt (04/28/2013) [-]
Yeah, occasionally one person will die a year. Maybe this is including 3rd world countries.
#36 to #33 - Thebiggeorgy (04/28/2013) [-]
I'm sure they're just busting down the doors for the Half off sale on Fresh water and Bread
User avatar #128 to #36 - zorororonoa (04/29/2013) [-]
Oh please get top comment
User avatar #51 to #28 - TheExile (04/28/2013) [-]
Yeah I did some research on the facts, and Black Friday was the most incorrect one. 3-5 people die on average, and that's rarely. Otherwise most of the facts were true.
User avatar #106 - DeathclawRulez (04/29/2013) [-]
Nice try sharks, i'm still not going in the water
#164 - eliotmoose (04/29/2013) [-]
gee bill two wieners?
#166 to #164 - lolwtfme (04/29/2013) [-]
thats right!
thats right!
#71 - injerseyforever (04/29/2013) [-]
I read the hot dog one as "Hot Dogs kill 70 children anally."
These are the things I expect from the internets.
#102 - wherethawhitewomen (04/29/2013) [-]
I was expecting this to be a pro-weed post.
I was expecting this to be a pro-weed post.
User avatar #103 to #102 - damnusername (04/29/2013) [-]
THAT GIF IS BREAKING MY BRAIN!
User avatar #139 to #103 - Sorrowscythe (04/29/2013) [-]
4th Dimension, bruh
#216 - tooanontoquit (04/29/2013) [-]
Attempted rape by dolphins kill 14 people annually
#52 - jok (04/28/2013) [-]
It makes sense that obesity kills three times more people than lightning bolts. Just imagining one of those things falling out of the sky gives me the chills. Lightning is pretty cool though
#61 to #52 - zdaninjamonkey (04/28/2013) [-]
someone just stole her chicken............RUUUUUNNNN
someone just stole her chicken............RUUUUUNNNN
User avatar #53 to #52 - dirtyshisno (04/28/2013) [-]
looks like shes out of breath just from standing up.
User avatar #70 - hotschurl (04/29/2013) [-]
AUSTRALIA

kills 100.000 people annually
User avatar #3 - newinterweber (04/28/2013) [-]
> Ron Jeremy
> Kills 100 anally
> annually
#116 - sketchfactor (04/29/2013) [-]
I thought it would be one of those "look at how few people die from guns" things.

I was glad when it wasn't.
#325 - harjinder (04/29/2013) [-]
I was expecting the last one to be "Marijuana kills 0 people a year".....
#361 to #325 - anon (04/29/2013) [-]
Well, there's multiple times someone is found dead and they had taken marijuana at the time of death. It's generally not the soul factor, but it contributes about as much as a drunk death.
#49 - ericzxvc (04/28/2013) [-]
Almost every single one of these is a blatant lie. Does anyone actually believe this 			****		?   
I also don't think he knows what the word annually means.   
Lightning does NOT kill 10k people a year   
www.chacha.com/question/how-many-people-die-per-year-worldwide-from-lightning-strikes   
This site says about 500, the wikipedia article has completely contradictory information and doesn't make any sense.   
Airplanes and hippos kill nowhere near that many people   
www.nydailynews.com/news/national/airplane-deaths-record-2011-report-article-1.999500   
401 people from airplanes in 2011   
I completely lol'd at the black friday and volcano ones   
http://www.volcanolive.com/fatalities.html   
Maybe in the 1800s there were more but there's a solid one person a year in the 2000s   
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Friday_(shopping)   
In their it gives two people who were shot on black friday near a shopping mall which is a stretch even then   
I mean these are pretty much all completely ridiculous, how is anyone believing this? I'm not going to bother to continue with the inane task of pointing out obvious fallacies.
Almost every single one of these is a blatant lie. Does anyone actually believe this **** ?
I also don't think he knows what the word annually means.
Lightning does NOT kill 10k people a year
www.chacha.com/question/how-many-people-die-per-year-worldwide-from-lightning-strikes
This site says about 500, the wikipedia article has completely contradictory information and doesn't make any sense.
Airplanes and hippos kill nowhere near that many people
www.nydailynews.com/news/national/airplane-deaths-record-2011-report-article-1.999500
401 people from airplanes in 2011
I completely lol'd at the black friday and volcano ones
http://www.volcanolive.com/fatalities.html
Maybe in the 1800s there were more but there's a solid one person a year in the 2000s
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Friday_(shopping)
In their it gives two people who were shot on black friday near a shopping mall which is a stretch even then
I mean these are pretty much all completely ridiculous, how is anyone believing this? I'm not going to bother to continue with the inane task of pointing out obvious fallacies.
User avatar #126 to #49 - garymotherfingoak (04/29/2013) [-]
>believing cha cha answers

they may have included injuries

the volano one is complete bull yes

it was probably injuries for black friday
+8
#142 - cghfg **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #151 to #142 - uhidk (04/29/2013) [-]
you could fall on your head and break your neck.
User avatar #157 to #142 - godhatesusall (04/29/2013) [-]
I think the idea behind that is that people hit their head or something and asphyxiate but don't wake up.
You also have to take account that this is America we're talking about and some people could easily die doing **** like that because they're obese and have a very hard time getting out of a bed (not saying all Americans are obese, but realistically 340 people out of 311,591,917 people makes sense if the people who die falling out of bed are REALLY obese).
-2
#160 to #157 - cghfg **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #172 to #160 - kommandantvideo (04/29/2013) [-]
Why are americans so fat?
Because they eat a lot, ******* .

That's my joke for the day, don't stone me.
#299 - brida (04/29/2013) [-]
wrong move ************
#266 - hybredmoon (04/29/2013) [-]
And yet none of these things fill me with the absolute pants 			********		, mind numbing terror of becoming a meal for a prehistoric god damned monster.   
   
  Just imagine, you're swimming along, the bright summer sun shining down turns the waves into warm cerulean tinted glass all around. Suddenly, you feel it. You cant see it but you can_ feel_ the presence of something huge in the water near you. Just as the uneasy feeling convinces you to turn for the shore you're suddenly snatched violently down and back, your head bobbing beneath the surface just long enough for you to choke when your shocked gasp causes you to inhale a bit of water.    
  Unease gives way to fear, and you kick desperately for the shore. But something is wrong, your right leg isn't working the way it should. You glance down and the blue water you thought was so beautiful has turned as red as a butchers floor.  Realization and pain slam into your mind, jostling for position at the front of your thoughts.    
Shark!   
  Your eyes turn back to shore now, it was so close before, it may as well be on another planet now. People are pointing, you pray for help but who can reach you in time, who can save you from five thousand pounds and millions of years of perfectly tuned evolution. You open your mouth to scream.   
"HE-"   
   And the water closes over your head. You're in it's mouth, oh dear god in heaven you're in it's mouth!  The teeth almost tickle as they prick against your skin but then the jaw closes, a ton and a half of pressure drives fifty daggers into your body. The air is crushed from your lungs, cold sea water causes your throat to seize shut painfully as you mindlessly seek to fill the void with something, anything! Of a sudden, you relax. The pain fades, replaced by a warm numbness. You've gone into shock. The last thing you hear, as the massive head shakes, is a sound like rock candy being bitten as your hips and spine are crushed. You wonder what they'll find.   
  Then the dark takes you.
And yet none of these things fill me with the absolute pants ******** , mind numbing terror of becoming a meal for a prehistoric god damned monster.

Just imagine, you're swimming along, the bright summer sun shining down turns the waves into warm cerulean tinted glass all around. Suddenly, you feel it. You cant see it but you can_ feel_ the presence of something huge in the water near you. Just as the uneasy feeling convinces you to turn for the shore you're suddenly snatched violently down and back, your head bobbing beneath the surface just long enough for you to choke when your shocked gasp causes you to inhale a bit of water.
Unease gives way to fear, and you kick desperately for the shore. But something is wrong, your right leg isn't working the way it should. You glance down and the blue water you thought was so beautiful has turned as red as a butchers floor. Realization and pain slam into your mind, jostling for position at the front of your thoughts.
Shark!
Your eyes turn back to shore now, it was so close before, it may as well be on another planet now. People are pointing, you pray for help but who can reach you in time, who can save you from five thousand pounds and millions of years of perfectly tuned evolution. You open your mouth to scream.
"HE-"
And the water closes over your head. You're in it's mouth, oh dear god in heaven you're in it's mouth! The teeth almost tickle as they prick against your skin but then the jaw closes, a ton and a half of pressure drives fifty daggers into your body. The air is crushed from your lungs, cold sea water causes your throat to seize shut painfully as you mindlessly seek to fill the void with something, anything! Of a sudden, you relax. The pain fades, replaced by a warm numbness. You've gone into shock. The last thing you hear, as the massive head shakes, is a sound like rock candy being bitten as your hips and spine are crushed. You wonder what they'll find.
Then the dark takes you.
User avatar #275 to #266 - hybredmoon (04/29/2013) [-]
As opposed to:
"Oh ***** " you think to yourself as the coca-cola logo looms over you like the hammer of judgement "I didn't really want a soda that bad." The machine falls, crushing your skull. You die instantly, but you die at last knowing why they had to put 'DO NOT TILT' on the machine. You also have a brief moment of nirvana like understanding of the futility of it all, as you realize that anyone retarded enough to ignore the sign, is probably just retarded enough to not move out of the way of the falling ******* machine.
User avatar #246 - CHARGERZ (04/29/2013) [-]
And i still ain't getting in the water with those ****** thangs.
#297 to #246 - stankfinger (04/29/2013) [-]
Sharks are quite tame and the real problem should be the greater evil. The Immortal jellyfish. www.mnn.com/earth-matters/animals/stories/immortal-jellyfish-does-it-really-live-forever
#219 - xsynysterx (04/29/2013) [-]
"annually" doesn't even seem like a real word after reading it so much
#256 to #219 - xxyzx (04/29/2013) [-]
iKR?
iKR?
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