Long but worth it. Probably repost found it on a best of /b/ thread.. File: -( 20 KB, 310x386, HOP story, ipg) e Be 19 Living in my collegedood Doing school thi
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Long but worth it

Probably repost found it on a best of /b/ thread.

File: -( 20 KB, 310x386, HOP story, ipg)
e Be 19
Living in my collegedood
Doing school things
Works at HOP
Because college town, be swinging
A group of at guys comes in every night
Three are nice and tip well
Cine asshole
Asshole always gets 6 pancakes.
After 2 months of dealing with them . jpg
Asshole' s outweighs his friends' Likeability
Slowly developing cancer from asshole radiation
e seems like he hasn' t mentally evolved yet
probs bordering tard status
uge muskie's though
instead of going for direct confronts: ion i make a decision
going to slowly and methodically **** his mind
Every night, one pancake gets more in nature
Maybe degrees on a day
Because i introduce the nickcage slowly he doesn' t notice for awhile
I watch happily and giddily as he chokes a cockface down
It begins to be the centerpiece of my day
Definably notices after it is straight up a big honkin' dick
Added whipped cream at the end of the urethra (blueberry)
Feel a storm brewin
I deliver his penor cake one fateful evening
He looks me dead in the face and asks me
Heyy -(deciphers nametag [letters hurt him]) a__ no___ n what is this **** ?"
I don' t know
You better start talking or I' ll talk to your manager"
Manager... Iet us refer to him as C.
C is my best friend.
jpg
I' II go get him for you, faggot, sir."
Sneak in faggot cause feeling extra alpha
e notices, not happy.
Approach C and explain everything. He all of it, every detail
e is in on the conspiracy now
Props to C for his improv work.
e sneaks in about El penis related puns into his talk with asshole.
Paraphrasing , Sir, we don' around back here
My employees aren' t messing with souljunk
That mightiest be a coincidence
You need more evidence than one penis shaped pancake
Other tables overhear and enjoy giggles
DYING in the kitchen
Asshole scowls, pays walks out.
jpg
no way this ************ will come
Justin case, C gets every employee on our shift in on it
Dumb ****** comes back
sitting in different zone to not deal with me
doesnt matter
This was our night to bring so many Gallic references in
An army of workers ready to bring penis into every open conversation
we were armed and ready
Gentlemen, this was no ordinary penis assault
This was the All Harlow' s Eve of cock
All men replaced their nametags with an alias for a peen
Chuck, Dick, Peter, Johnson, and the Asian bashboy? Dong
All men stuffed their frontal pantaloons with things to give noticeable bulge
We plan the assault in waves
Phase I begins
First waiter comes, nametag Johnson
Takes orders, waves bulge in Assholes face
mother. ******* . pancakes.
fooi. jpg
Cue Dick
brings drinks, spills Assholes on himself in the cock region
Furiously cleans it 2 feet from Assholes face
Uproar in the kitchen
Total improv
All of our sides
other tables get ****** service and tips will be slim tonight
worth it
e mo more waves pass
e stands
Silence in the kitchen
e comes into the kitchen
we skitter
C takes over and calms him down
should have been a counselor
Final wave commence
he had seen Dong clean the previous spill and caught wind of the nametags after that
I stroll out
He looks pissed as ****
I hand him not one, but six straight up cocks. No disputing
Bacon pubes, cherry herpes, whipped creampies
My nametag for this evening?
Penis
He rages and punches me cold
Wake up in the hospital
all employees are around my bed
Wake up to applause
Broken nose but oh so worth it
Never see him again
we are known henceforth as IEDC
International House of Cock
...
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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#1 - anonymous (04/22/2013) [+] (8 replies)
I put it to you sir that in fact you are the real asshole, because this man has not tipped you to your satisfaction and or was conducting himself in a rude manor you have taken it apon yourself to make his visits to your store a less than satisfactory experience.
#4 to #2 - btchpls (04/22/2013) [-]
The above story? Could be fantasy, could be real - who cares? It's all interweb BS

You on the other hand have a deep seated and very misplaced sense of entitlement, there's some weak, even childish deferment as well.

1. I have worked food service, so don't try that "you wouldn't understand" with me.
2. It's the wait staff's job to be "nice and polite" as it's what they're paid to do, aside from carrying food - it's ALL they're paid to do.
3. Customers don't know or care how many hours you work, if you're working too much that's your problem so fix it.
4. "Always tip 15% or more, say your please and thanks" - I'm so ******* sick of halfwit waitstaff thinking they can do a ****** job yet are still entitled to a tip. Get lippy, mess with my food and no tip is the BEST you can hope for.

All that's asked of you is to do the minimum, not even a smile is needed - show up at the table, take the order, ask will that be all, fill the water periodically & bring the ******* food - how damn hard is that?

Sure working food service can be stressful, there's assholes everywhere. Don't for a second mistake it for actual "work" physical or mental, there's a reason so many are ******* drones.
#6 - teranin ONLINE (04/22/2013) [-]
>all hallow's eve of cock
>all hallow's eve of cock
#12 - chandaman (04/23/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #11 - paintballgun (04/23/2013) [-]
Glorious man just glorious. Grade A man this is some pretty awesome **** you found man. Just awesome
#8 - mrshrapnel (04/22/2013) [-]
Holy **** this is gold!
#14 - Crusader (04/23/2013) [-]
I lost it at "dick around"
I lost it at "dick around"
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