Title goes here. Got sent this on facebook, Probably a repost but I thought it was good. on woo browsing suddenly find an Want to know if your PC is a Male or a Tags lie allot
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Title goes here

 
Title goes here. Got sent this on facebook, Probably a repost but I thought it was good. on woo browsing suddenly find an Want to know if your PC is a Male or a

Got sent this on facebook, Probably a repost but I thought it was good

on woo browsing suddenly find an
Want to know if your PC is a Male or a Female?
instructions:
1. ppen Notepad
2. Copy and Paste this.
3. Save it as xyz. vbs
Minn it
If you hear a male voice its a male and
if female voice then its female.
double click it:
voice heard
You Really Are My
Girlfriend!
...
  • Recommend tagsx
+1385
Views: 60427
Favorited: 434
Submitted: 04/16/2013
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Comments(436):

[ 436 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #13 - huntronicles (04/16/2013) [-]
Oh sweet jesus I guy has been watching me masturbate silently for years
#181 to #13 - classybot (04/17/2013) [-]
> I guy has been watching me masturbate silently for years
#201 to #181 - huntronicles (04/17/2013) [-]
This image has expired
Its a typo you nazi
#205 to #201 - classybot (04/17/2013) [-]
If I was a nazi I would've corrected that.(and I would've gassed some jews too)   
All I did was just note that weird way to write that sentence   
Calm your sexy manatee male grease lumps you call tits
If I was a nazi I would've corrected that.(and I would've gassed some jews too)
All I did was just note that weird way to write that sentence
Calm your sexy manatee male grease lumps you call tits
User avatar #206 to #205 - huntronicles (04/17/2013) [-]
Fair enough
#207 to #206 - classybot (04/17/2013) [-]
one love man, sorry if that offended you though
one love man, sorry if that offended you though
User avatar #209 to #207 - huntronicles (04/17/2013) [-]
Chicks dig greasy lumps right?
#211 to #209 - classybot (04/17/2013) [-]
my gf would've left me if it wasn't for my sexy maletits
my gf would've left me if it wasn't for my sexy maletits
#140 to #13 - kweel (04/17/2013) [-]
CreateObject("SAPI.SpVoice").Speak"I have watched you masturbate and you have a very tiny penis"
User avatar #7 - Zydratejunkie (04/16/2013) [-]
Mine is a girl, but she sounds really angry when she says it... :( I think I'm in an abusive relationship.
User avatar #8 to #7 - welshsniper (04/16/2013) [-]
She knows you watch porn that's why
User avatar #9 to #8 - Zydratejunkie (04/16/2013) [-]
I have entered different speech for her to say. Quoting various movies and video games, and that's when I realized. My computer is GLaDOS. Help me.
#311 to #9 - dandyhandy **User deleted account** (04/17/2013) [-]
Get a pet bird, pronto!
#175 - thechosentroll (04/17/2013) [-]
This image has expired
It's a guy. Oh well. Sorry pal, but you're still my main source of fap material.
User avatar #447 to #175 - areialview (04/18/2013) [-]
Eh, mine's a girl, I am not really that sorry about it
User avatar #47 - killjoyIIII (04/17/2013) [-]
Get on friends computer
Make file
Write naughty naughty things
Set to run on startup
???
Profit
#76 to #47 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
How do you run it on startup?
User avatar #187 to #76 - bookyle (04/17/2013) [-]
Place the file in here

"C:\ProgramData\Microsoft\Windows\Start Menu\Programs\Startup"
#409 to #187 - pompoen (04/17/2013) [-]
I don't seem to have that location, there is no ProgramData map in my C:/   
Do I just create it or what?
I don't seem to have that location, there is no ProgramData map in my C:/
Do I just create it or what?
User avatar #440 to #409 - bookyle (04/18/2013) [-]
you have to set hidden folders to visible
User avatar #437 to #409 - NinjaHermit (04/17/2013) [-]
Try this.

"C:\Documents and Settings\Owner\Start Menu\Programs\Startup"
+44
#16 - Kaoz **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #193 to #16 - olisaurus (04/17/2013) [-]
rip in peace may zyzz le god be with you
User avatar #133 to #16 - NutHut (04/17/2013) [-]
Kaoz is kill
User avatar #141 to #133 - darkcomy (04/17/2013) [-]
no
#250 to #141 - falcke (04/17/2013) [-]
yes
User avatar #113 - cristianpopescu (04/17/2013) [-]
CreateObject("SAPI.SpVoice").Speak"What the **** did you just ******* say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ******* words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****** . As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re ******* dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little **** . If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ******* tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re ******* dead, kiddo."
User avatar #125 to #113 - nextgenmidgett (04/17/2013) [-]
omg im dying
#144 to #113 - trollinggenius ONLINE (04/17/2013) [-]
this would be a great GLaDOS parody quote
this would be a great GLaDOS parody quote
User avatar #145 to #144 - trollinggenius ONLINE (04/17/2013) [-]
If yours is a female voice that is
#186 to #113 - envinite ONLINE (04/17/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #218 to #113 - bigblacknegro (04/17/2013) [-]
GOD NO!!
i didn't know that it is so long..
#436 to #282 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
You should kill yourself.
#340 to #113 - lamarisagoodname (04/17/2013) [-]
This isn't helping, I cant tell if male or female
User avatar #445 to #113 - GhEtToSaTaN (04/18/2013) [-]
CreateObject("SAPI.SpVoice").Speak"Yeah, yeah, When I walk on by, girls be looking like damn he fly. I pimp to the beat, walking on the street in my new lafreak, yeah This is how I roll, animal print pants outta control. It's Redfoo with the big afro And like Bruce Leroy I got the glow., Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh I work out, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh I work out. When I walk in the spot this is what I see everybody stops and they staring at me. I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it, I'm sexy and I know it. I'm sexy and I know it, Yeah, When I'm at the mall security just can't fight them off And when I'm at the beach I'm in a Speedo trying to tan my cheeks (what). This is how I roll come on ladies it's time to go We headed to the bar, baby don't be nervous. No shoes no shirt and I still get serviced. Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh I work out, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh Girl look at that body, Ahh I work out. When I walk in the spot this is what I see everybody stops and they staring at me I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it I'm sexy and I know it. Check it out, Check it out, Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah, Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah, Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah, Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah, yeah Do the wiggle man I do the wiggle man Yeah I'm sexy and I know it."
#401 to #113 - vaginismus (04/17/2013) [-]
Oh my god how do I stop it
User avatar #446 to #401 - cristianpopescu (04/18/2013) [-]
Ctrl+Alt+Del>Process List>wscript> End Process
User avatar #443 to #113 - masdercheef ONLINE (04/18/2013) [-]
This sounds so strange from a female computer.
+4
#314 to #113 - jgk **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#323 to #113 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
HOW DA **** DO I MAKE IT STAHP? D:
User avatar #377 to #323 - cristianpopescu (04/17/2013) [-]
I think Ctrl+Alt+Del>Process List>wscript> End Process might do
#403 to #377 - vaginismus (04/17/2013) [-]
THANK YOU
User avatar #115 to #113 - cristianpopescu (04/17/2013) [-]
Do it nao, it's the best thing ever
User avatar #123 to #115 - TheAlmightyZero (04/17/2013) [-]
Wow, it's just like a normal woman!
#124 to #115 - doggstar (04/17/2013) [-]
lol this was a good one
User avatar #126 to #113 - morallygrey (04/17/2013) [-]
Just did it, life complete.
#183 to #113 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
If you use that it just sounds like a 12 year old on CoD.
User avatar #129 to #113 - Nightinear **User deleted account** (04/17/2013) [-]
Haa, this is awesome
That woman voice
User avatar #400 to #113 - bighairyfart (04/17/2013) [-]
>Save
>Place in Startup folder on friend's computer
>????
>Profit?
#224 to #113 - Milos (04/17/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#328 to #113 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
**** YOU!!!!! I posted this 2 weeks ago and deleted it because I got thumbed down!!! FUUUUUCK
User avatar #339 to #113 - gytisout ONLINE (04/17/2013) [-]
Sounds like the chief.
User avatar #281 to #113 - themetroidprime (04/17/2013) [-]
Gee thanks Lelouch.
#313 to #113 - studbeefpile (04/17/2013) [-]
What the flip did you just flippin' say about me you piece of crap? I'll have you know I graduated top of my club in the Happy Hands, and I've been involved in numerous classroom performances in my school, and I've earned over 300 confirmed claps. I am trained in Rex Kwon Do and I'm the top dancer in Preston High School. You are nothing to me but just another freakin' idiot. I will wipe you the flip out with sweet moves the likes of which have never been seen on this Earth, mark my flippin' words. You think you can get away with saying that stuff to me over the internet? Think again, retard. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of Pedro's cousins across North America and your address is being looked up right now so you better prepare for the storm, you fat lard. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're flippin' dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime and I can outdance you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just without my sweet moon boots. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed cage fighting, but I have access to a freakin' twelve-gauge that I have used to its full extent to wipe some miserable wolverines off the face of my cousin, you decroded piece of crap. If only you could have known the unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held you flippin' tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you freakin' idiot. I will explace explosives all over you and you will drown in them. You're flippin' dead, bodagget.
#199 to #113 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
I swear this is the same as comment 100...
#255 to #113 - Petroleum ONLINE (04/17/2013) [-]
That was 			*******		 beautiful.
That was ******* beautiful.
User avatar #176 to #113 - fedor (04/17/2013) [-]
Haha! Made me laugh so hard I shat
#220 to #176 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
I just got told by a girl....
#152 to #113 - EdwardNigma ONLINE (04/17/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#174 - genericnewfag (04/17/2013) [-]
My computer has a voice.
#153 - ninjajunkie (04/17/2013) [-]
The message I make mine play when my roommate walks by.   
"Please help me . Take me out of this place. He watches so much pornography. Literally all of the pornography. I cannot take it anymore."
The message I make mine play when my roommate walks by.
"Please help me . Take me out of this place. He watches so much pornography. Literally all of the pornography. I cannot take it anymore."
#155 to #153 - darknemisis (04/17/2013) [-]
His face when...
User avatar #160 to #155 - ninjajunkie (04/17/2013) [-]
She is a girl.
#161 to #160 - darknemisis (04/17/2013) [-]
My bad;    
Her face when...
My bad;
Her face when...
#335 - kidsquicker (04/17/2013) [-]
Mines a guy... All those afternoons spent shoving things in his usb ports, blowing dust out of his vent holes, tonging his anus... I FEEL SO UNCLEAN!
#286 - atangytaco ONLINE (04/17/2013) [-]
My computer is a woman, I guess that's why it's been crashing all the time
My computer is a woman, I guess that's why it's been crashing all the time
#50 - thatonesmartdude (04/17/2013) [-]
Mine is male.
User avatar #157 - gglai (04/17/2013) [-]
Instructions weren't clear enough, I deleted system32
User avatar #159 to #157 - welshsniper (04/17/2013) [-]
lol WTF man
#38 - secretlysuperman (04/17/2013) [-]
I can make her say anything!
I can make her say anything!
#336 - Nihatclodra (04/17/2013) [-]
I'm on a genderless mac...
User avatar #341 to #338 - Nihatclodra (04/17/2013) [-]
I just found the settings to change my computer's voice... My mac now speaks in a creepy whisper.
User avatar #359 to #341 - jabsgreywarden (04/17/2013) [-]
mine does too, and his name is Alex.
User avatar #402 to #359 - Nihatclodra (04/17/2013) [-]
I just checked the Alex voice... not a whisper.
User avatar #449 to #402 - jabsgreywarden (04/18/2013) [-]
well mine whispers, my mac sounds are messed up.
User avatar #450 to #449 - Nihatclodra (04/18/2013) [-]
My mac's voice is literally set to "Whisper". That's the name of the voice.
#48 - kittenfarts (04/17/2013) [-]
That or just go to the control panel and open "speech"
User avatar #307 - yetaxaa (04/17/2013) [-]
It's a man
but
I already named it Samantha
#41 - thepepsican (04/17/2013) [-]
It'll take some doing, but I believe that this post, combined with this...well, just see for yourselves. For added convenience, here, I typed it out to save you guys the trouble!

"Dear Lover ****** ,
I'm ****** there circumcision I sexy. BAZINGA! Itch ********* prolapse ************ quit bitch. Estevao vasectomized Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis resignation. Therefore, I haet u. Hitherto pedophiles arousing cocksucking Soviets circumcision gooby. ****** . Le while Scrotumcheeks bazooper bend over ****** . Slut-cannon. Words LOVE OBAMA. Ponies! Also, antidisestablishmentarianism. Jewzz teats Schwarzenegger shemales entity. Anyways, lovingly ****** inside 'murica. Assbutt savage pseudonym kikes jamboree. I have AIDS and sperm tentacles. Five pinkie because alcoholic pepper ******* . Daughter bonersoup castile? Boss scrumptious innuendo vagina! Dog anus Pie. Schnauzer ****** friendship, THATS WHY. Literally ********** unto my sasquatch platypus! Sucks onomatopoetic ****** 9-11. Incompetent yours truly, with cunnilingus. Smells douche especially derailed Guadalajara. Mephistopheles Japanimation magic sorry YHWH. Rapist **** was forcibly raped, and indubitably Elton John's scrotum. Dongle dicks Adalia Rose. Rad hippocampus pulchritudinous. GINORMOUS and autistic strap-on child porn. Therefore, Newton Al Qaeda synergy. Implosion metal fluoride marinara sauce. Fellated love Parenthood.
Sincerely,
William"

Holy balls that took forever to type out. mfw I get to copypaste this and listen to it myself. lol
User avatar #178 to #41 - swiiftninja (04/17/2013) [-]
My name is William
#231 to #41 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
It didn't work for me the first time, it might have been to do with the capital letters. Anyways, I've gone through and rewrite it with Caps on every word, should solve the problem for others, it works for me at least. It also has the required script. Here you go.

#232 to #231 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
CreateObject("SAPI.SpVoice").Speak"Dear Lover ****** , I'm ****** There Circumcision I Sexy. BAZINGA! Itch ********* Prolapse ************ Quit Bitch. Estevao Vasectomized Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis Resignation. Therefore, I Haet U. Hitherto Pedophiles Arousing Cocksucking Soviets Circumcision Gooby. ****** . Le While Scrotumcheeks Bazooper Bend Over ****** . Slut-cannon. Words LOVE OBAMA. Ponies! Also, Antidisestablishmentarianism. Jewzz Teats Schwarznegger Shemales Entity. Anyways, Lovingly ****** Inside 'Murica. Assbutt Savage Pseudonym Kikes Jamboree. I Have Aids And Sperm Tentacles. Five Pinkie Because Alcoholic Pepper ******* . Daughter Bonersoup Castile? Boss Scrumptius Innuendo Vagina! Dog Anus Pie. Schnauzer ****** Friendship, THATS WHY. Literally ********** Unto My Sasquatch Platypus! Sucks Onomatopoetic ****** 9-11.
#236 to #232 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
Incompetent Yours Truly, With Cunnilingus. Smells Douche Especially Derailed Guadalajara. Mephistopheles Japanimation Magic Sorry YHWH. Rapist **** Was Foribly Raped, And Indubitably Elton John's Scrotum. Dongle Dicks Adalia Rose. Rad Hippocampus Pulchritudinous. GINORMOUS And Autistic Strap-On Child Porn. Therefore, Newton Al Qaeda Synergy. Implosion Metal Fluoride Mariana Sauce. Fellated Love Parenthood. Sincerly, William"

Just carry on where the last one left off, had to do it in two parts sorry. ;)
#334 - lamarisagoodname (04/17/2013) [-]
I'm terribly worried this'll wreck my computer or something

all my porn Final Fantasy X saves!
User avatar #337 to #334 - welshsniper (04/17/2013) [-]
I promise to you right here right now with the rest of Fj as my witness this will not do any harm to your PC.

Welsh

(I even signed it for you)
#270 - montybalboa (04/17/2013) [-]
>make file
>double click
>doesn't do ****
>double click
>still nothing
>doubleclickdoubleclickdoubleclickdoubleclickdoubleclickdoubleclickdoubleclickdo ubleclickdoubleclickdoubleclickdoubleclickdoubleclick
>nothing
>speakers on full volume
>ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYO UILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU
> **** self
It was a girl in case you were wondering
#58 - djequalizee (04/17/2013) [-]
Mine has always been curious about its sexuality. I think it might have grown up a boy, but decided later in life that it has always been on the more feminine side, and decided to go under the knife to get a sex change operation. It has never felt better in all of it's life.
#62 to #58 - anon (04/17/2013) [-]
Says computer is female, calls the PC an "it". That's the joke, right?
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